Chapter 16 Old Friends
Meg took a deep breath and stepped inside his lair. It was all as she remembered the last night she had been at the Opera three months ago, just that she was completely sure that before she stepped through the mirror everything had been in order. Papers were spread all over the floor with pieces of glass and some of his clothing hanging from the opened drawers. Candelabras were laid over the cold stone, the wax of the candles already dry. A wave of anxiety crept over her body as the memories of that night appeared on her mind. Yes, she had been afraid of how things would turn out in the end, and to be honest, she hadn't expected it to be like it was.
She walked carefully up the stairs which led to his majestic organ, feeling a wave of anger as she realized that some of the keys were missing. How could people be so cruel? There was absolutely no need to break things, especially when it was about something as elegant and beautiful as that organ. Meg bent down to collect some score sheets, observing the written notes with his beautiful calligraphy. She felt tears began to prickle at the corner of her eyes, and blinking them away she put the sheets aside and turn around in the direction of his room. With trembling legs, she walked to his room, stepping inside nervously. She looked around the magnificent room, a bed in the shape of a swan in the middle of it. Scarlet sheets covered the expanse of the bed, pillows spread over the mattress and all over the floor.
Her heart skipped a beat as she saw the face of Christine looking back at her from the ground. She stepped closer, realizing that it was a portrait Erik had made. She would have recognized his technique anywhere. Meg closed her eyes trying to calm herself down, remembering that he loved her when he drew that portrait of Christine. But still, she looked absolutely beautiful. Christine had been Meg's best friend since the moment her mother had brought her to the Populaire. They had shared so much together that Meg considered her a sister. She didn't feel hate or had hard feelings towards Christine for what she had done to Erik, somehow she understood her decision. Christine loved Raoul, and although she appreciated Erik, she simply didn't see him as more than a teacher and guardian.
She closed her eyes, feeling his presence closer like never before. She could faintly smell the scent of roses and candle wax, that scent which was uniquely his. Opening her eyes abruptly, she turned around, expecting to find him standing on the threshold. She was alone, as she had been for a while since she left Florence and her husband behind. She felt like an intruder in the room, as if she didn't belong there. There was still so much about him that she didn't know, and he didn't know things about her either. Walking slowly around the bed, the pain in the center of her chest intensified as memories of all the time they had spent together rushed through her mind.
"Why did I leave you there?" she whispered, running her fingertips along the edge of the beautiful bed. Meg couldn't remember the last time she had slept peacefully, not being haunted by the sound of his voice, green sparkling eyes, soft and warm hands tracing the length of her neck and holding her hand gently. She had no idea how had she managed to spend so many sleepless nights and still be able to lead an entire ballet corps. Slowly, she sat down on the bed, surprised when she found it surprisingly comfortable. Pondering between lying down for a while or returning to the surface, she found herself slowly leaning down into the pillow. She let out a tired sigh and closed her eyes the moment her head touched the pillow, realizing how tired she really was.
It had taken her at least two hours to find her way down to his lair again. The way her mother had sent her the night of the fire had been sealed so no one could return to the terrifying lair of the monster. So Meg had had to find her own way down through the dark and wet tunnels. She had slipped a few times, nervous on falling onto one of his traps again. She was completely sure that he would not come to rescue her this time. But in the end, somehow she had arrived at the entrance of his home, or what was left of his home.
What would he be doing right now? Would he be thinking about her as she was about him? Her body yearned for him, she need him, like she had never needed anyone before. As the days passed, a piece of her heart fell apart. Reaching out a hand she grabbed hold of the closest pillow and gripped it tightly against her chest, stunned when his scent invaded her senses. Lazily she opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling, her muscles slowly beginning to relax. But as she slowly began to drift away, the image of Christine appeared on her mind. Meg remembered what Erik had told her the day he had confessed all of what he had endured.
She remembered that he had said that Christine had fainted…could it be that, where Meg was lying, Christine had lain too? A stab of jealousy ran across Meg's chest as the image of the final confrontation appeared on her mind, Christine had kissed him that night, trying to persuade him to allow Raoul and her free. It had been Erik's first kiss, and it had been with someone who didn't care about what would happen to him. But still she felt somewhat angry that she hadn't been able to be his first kiss. Meg closed her eyes once more, remembering the night he had first kissed her. Erik had found enough courage to take that big step and change both their lives forever. Meg had never thought that he would be able to care about a woman after all he had been through with Christine. She knew that he trusted her, even to the point that he had married her.
She glanced towards his organ, trying to visualize him sitting down on the bench playing one of his many creations. How would it be when they would finally have a normal and peaceful life? She groaned with frustration and turned on her side, pressing the pillow tightly against her face. Meg felt alone, like if no one could comprehend what was happening to her. Her mother had tried to make her understand that it was just a matter of time before he returned to her, but still the feeling that something bad would happen never left her chest. The premiere of Don Juan was near, and the production still didn't have a lead dancer or a leading soprano. Apparently the soprano would arrive today or tomorrow, all depended on the weather. Meg also knew that Erik would arrive soon; she just hoped that he came before the night of the premiere, so they could leave Paris as soon as possible.
Soon she began to fall asleep, she still was conscious, but her body was relaxed. There was no other sound in the lair than the lap of water colliding against the shore and her soft breathing. She missed the life she had begun to have in Florence, the job at the studio, the walks to Piazza della Repubblica. Preparing breakfast each morning, talking with Arabelle, Gisella and Isabella. She missed the children…but most of all she missed him. She drifted to sleep with the memory of La Medicea surrounding her. She thought she heard the sound of something, a peaceful sound echoing around the room. Then she thought she heard it again. It was the same tune Erik had hummed so many nights ago. She opened her eyes instantly, rising up so she could be in a sitting position. Turning her head from one side to another, she tried to find the source of the melody, which had become louder now that she was using all of her senses. Putting her feet on the ground, she rose slowly, walking around the room until she saw it. A papier-mache musical box, in the shape of a barrel-organ. Attached, the figure of a monkey in Persian robes playing the cymbals. The monkey balanced from one side to the other, his arms repeating the same movement as the cymbals collided together creating a soft sound. The details in the monkey were astounding; from the little shoes he wore to the red turban with the black feather on it. Stretching a trembling hand, Meg caressed the face of the monkey.
The music was hypnotizing, as was all that the lair contained. Even its owner was hypnotizing. Soon, the monkey stopped playing and all that remained was the final note echoing through the caverns. Without a second thought, Meg grabbed the music box carefully and straightened up. She was not going to leave this down there, somehow she felt that this had been really especial to Erik and when he returned, she would give it back to him. Giving the room a final look, she stepped out of the room and walked in the direction she had come.
Erik stepped down from the carriage, suddenly blinded by the sunlight of the Parisian day. He never though that he would need to return to the place where most of his dreams had been shattered. Although he highly appreciated the Opera Populaire, he still wasn't sure if he was ready to step inside once more. The façade of the building was decorated with rose marble columns, friezes, sculpture groups and two large gilded statues, which shined with the reflection of the bright sunlight. Erik had never had the opportunity of observing how imposing and breathtaking the building was in broad daylight. He stood mesmerized by the view in front of him, surprised by the beauty of the place he had once called home. Blinking repeatedly to clear his vision, he began climbing up the steps which led to the main entrance, clenching his fists tightly trying to stop the sudden knot forming on the pit of his stomach. Suddenly he stopped, realization dawning in him. He couldn't walk in as if nothing had happened and just face the authorities. He needed to see Meg first. But how?
The journey from Florence had been really exhausting, so Erik had spent most of the time sleeping; not wanting to be conscious so his mind wouldn't begin assaulting him with memories of the blond ballerina. Arabelle and Federico had left him on the train station, trying to assure him that everything would turn out fine and that they would be expecting them when they returned. So definitely he wasn't sleepy. Actually, he felt strong and powerful, something he hadn't felt for a long time. Retracing his steps, he walked down from the main entrance and walked around until he came to the path that led to the stables. There was a secret passage there, the passage which Meg and he had taken the night of the fire. Cautious that no one was in sight, he snuck into the stable, hurrying to the wall where he remembered the passage was, and pushing aside some of the bricks, located the entrance. Taking in a deep breath, Erik stepped inside. The smell of dampness surrounded him, the tunnel only lighted by the faint sunlight that passed through the door he had just closed. Tightening his cloak around him, he began walking in the direction that led him towards his lair. It was as if it never had happened, as if he had never left the Opera Populaire and now was walking towards the stage where he would watch rehearsals, just to then send a letter communicating what he had observed. The ballet girls were missing their entrance, the singer were off-pitched…he would analyze every single detail. And he was still in love with Christine. He was still invisible, hidden because of his monstrous face.
But now everything was different. His face was not disfigured any more, he looked as any other men, probably some scars here and there, but actually he looked normal. He didn't need to hide anymore; he wouldn't threaten the managers or persuade Christine. He wasn't in love with her anymore. This time he was a new man seeking for his wife. He was looking for Meg, the little blond ballerina who had risked all she had to save him and take him to a safe place, creating a strong bond of friendship with her. A friendship which had become a marriage in which, at some point, he had developed strong feelings for her, feelings which still thrilled and terrified him.
"It seems that the Phantom has returned" he whispered, his footsteps echoing through the dark tunnel.
Drawing near to the entrance of the tunnel where she had come, Meg slowed her steps, holding carefully the music box in her hands. She opened the door which led to the hallway, peeking out to see if there was any one there. At the sight of the empty corridor, she stepped out hurriedly and ran in the direction of the Prima Donna´s dressing room. When she closed the door she leaned back against it, looking up to the ceiling as she tried to slow the pace of her heart. She held the monkey carefully near her chest, holding it in a possessive manner. She knew that anyone who had been down at the lair the night of the fire would surely recognize the music box. And she was absolutely sure that her mother would not like the idea of her being alone down on the cellars of the Opera House.
Meg walked towards a trunk which was next to the boudoir and placed the music box inside of it, locking it cautiously. The moment she straightened up, a sudden knock on the door caused her to gasp with surprise. Without waiting for an invitation, the door opened and her mother walked in hurriedly, her face flushed by the effort, surely she had run a long distance.
"Marguerite, where have you been?" she asked raising an eyebrow as she approached to Meg.
"Sorry, Maman, I've must have fallen asleep" Meg lied. Lying had never been something easy to her, especially when it was to her mother.
Antoinette grabbed her by the hand an pulled her towards the door "We must be at the stage right away, the lead soprano just arrived"
Meg stopped suddenly, causing her mother to turn around and looked inquisitively at her.
"Who is she?" Meg asked in a whisper, suddenly feeling her legs glued to the floor.
Her mother gave her a compassionate glance and dragged her further out of the dressing room "You will see"
Meg let her mother drag her through the long and deserted corridor which led to the stage. At some point they began running, the voices of the crowd becoming louder with each step they took. In a blink of an eye they were standing behind the crowd, a circle forming around the newly arrived visitors. Meg could hear the voices of Monsieur Firmin and Monsieur Andre as they talked with the woman who was standing in the middle of the congregation, holding the arm of a tall man. They both wore elegant clothing, showing that they belonged to the high society of Paris. The woman had her back to Meg, but still she would have recognized those chocolate dark curls anywhere.
At that moment, Meg heard the voice of the woman, soft and delicate. The voice that had bewitched all Paris and her now husband. Feeling her throat suddenly dry, Meg took a step back, lifting a hand to her forehead. She took another step back prepared to leave the stage, when her mother´s hand grabbed her firmly by the arm, a severe expression on her face. How could this be? Of all the sopranos in Europe how had they chosen Christine again? Above all that, how had she accepted? How had Raoul let her? She couldn't be here, not when Erik would arrive any day. He would see her, he would feel all the pain once more…but what if he still felt something for her? What if when he heard her sing he would be blinded once more? A lump formed in her throat at the image of Erik leaving her. No, that wouldn't happen, Christine was already married. And for all she knew, Erik did care for her, even to the point of having a facial reconstruction. They had shared so much together, he was a new man. But what if Christine recognized him and warned the authorities?
Meg took another step back, taking advantage of her mother's distraction and turned around to leave.
"Meg?"
Suddenly the stage fell into complete silence. Meg froze, turning around slowly, recognizing that voice clearly. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest as she saw the crowd parting to let the way clear.
"I knew it was you!" Christine squeaked excitedly as she picked up the hem of her gown and hurried to stand in front of her.
Meg stood frozen, unable to move or say anything as Christine embraced her tightly. Suddenly Meg remembered that she was supposed to be excited as well and raised her arms to encircle Christine's upper back gently. After a moment Christine drew back, giving Meg the opportunity to see her closely. She still looked as beautiful as always, her eyes sparkling as they had never before, the shy and insecure girl who lived at the Populaire long forgotten. In her place stood a radiant woman who seemed confident with herself. She wore an elegant burgundy gown which made her pale skin glow. Her long chocolate curls were pulled back, cascading down her back freely. Her cheeks were not pale as they had been, instead a rose tint colored them. This was not the Christine who had lived at the Populaire, in her place stood a more mature and confident woman. Meg was aware of her friend saying something and explaining details of her wedding and demanding an explanation of where had she had been during all that time. Suddenly she stopped, glancing down to Meg's hands.
"My God look at this" Christine breathed, looking back again to her "You are a married woman now? Why haven't you told me?"
Meg shrugged and gave her a weak smile "Nobody knew about it"
Christine stared at her surprised, an excited smile forming on her lips "You have to tell me every single detail!"
"It was not much-" Meg tried to explain as Christine turned around looking for someone.
"Raoul! Look who is married now!" Christine squeaked to her husband who was talking with Monsieur Firmin. He apologized and turned in the direction of them.
"I'm sorry Christine-"Meg apologized as she tried to release her hand from Christine's grip "But I really have to go now-"
And with that she turned around and ran towards the exit of the stage, leaving a stunned Christine and Raoul behind. She couldn't talk to her, not right now. She needed to organize her ideas and plan what she would say to her best friend. She didn't wanted to lie, but she knew that if Christine discovered that she had married Erik, things wouldn't turn out fine.
Erik turned to glance back over his shoulder to make sure no one was following him, although he knew that no one had ever known the passage he was taking. He had been wandering around the Populaire in search of the only reason he had ever dared to return to this place. He hadn't imagined the wave of emotions he would have felt when he stepped into his lair once more. Everything was destroyed; nothing had been spared by the furious mob, not even his organ. And although he wouldn't have liked to admit it, it had caused him a great pain to see his old home in ruins. With each step he took in the shadows, he felt more and more out of place, as if he didn't belong to the shadows anymore. And he didn't like that feeling.
Looking out through a crack on the wall he realized that the corridors were deserted. With an expression of confusion, he kept walking, pursing his lips in frustration. Where was she? He had looked in the dressing rooms, Madame Giry's office, and even the manager's office. The only thing he had discovered was that she had been using the Prima Donna's dressing room; he would recognize those dresses anywhere. They had been the ones he had bought her during their first week on Florence. So now he was sure where was she staying, but there was no hint as to where she might at the end of the tunnel, he walked cautiously into another tunnel which led to the chapel. It was his last hope. He wouldn't face the authorities, not until he was sure she was safe and sound. He clenched his fists, his wedding ring pressing tightly against the palm of his hand. Erik winced at the physical pain he felt on the center of his chest, a pain which had only grown since he had woken up in the hospital alone. The memory of her lovely face assaulted him, making the corner of his eyes itching with unshed tears, blinking furiously to clear his vision. The scent of wax began filling his senses as he approached the chapel, quickening his pace and then stopping at the sound of voices.
He rested against the wall holding his breath as he listened carefully trying to understand what they were talking about. His heart skipped a beat as he recognized who was talking. He would have recognized that voice anywhere. He had created it after all. He took a step forward slowly, standing behind the stained glass window so he could see them properly. Erik's breath caught in his throat as he realized that it was Meg who was inside the chapel. But she was not alone, she was with Christine.
Meg was kneeling in front of the picture of her father as silent tears rolled down from her cheeks. Why did she feel like that? Christine was her friend after all! She would understand, surely she would. But still Meg was aware of the strong bond Erik and Christine had shared, and that terrified her horribly. What would happen when Erik arrived and saw Christine? Was he really over her? Somehow she knew that Erik felt something for her, something strong, and something that he had never shared with Christine. It was something real.
"Meg?"
The soft whisper came like a breeze and immediately she knew that it was Christine who was standing behind her. Lifting a quick hand to wipe away her tears, she turned around slowly, a soft smile on her lips. Christine was standing at the threshold, a look of pure concern on her face. Yes, deep inside her she was still the girl who lived at the Populaire.
"Sorry I disappeared so suddenly earlier" Meg apologized as she stood up carefully "I began feeling a little bit dizzy"
Christine approached to her with an honest smile "That's all right; there was quite a lot of people on the stage"
"So now tell me, how have you been?" asked Meg with a smile.
"My God, it has been so incredible!" Christine answered excitedly "Raoul has taken me to so many beautiful places! The world beyond the Opera House is much more beautiful than I have ever imagined"
As Christine continued to tell Meg about the places in Europe she and Raoul had visited, Meg couldn't help but notice how much she had missed her. Christine had practically grown up with her. They had shared so much together that Meg couldn't imagine how her life at the Populaire had been without her. Underneath the fancy clothing and stylish hair-do, her best friend was still there, and Meg couldn't help but to smile. She had really missed her after all. The way her face glowed with excitement and happiness proved to Meg that she was truly happy, and that maybe she wouldn't have been as happy if she would have stayed with Erik.
At some point, Christine grabbed Meg's hand and walked with her towards the bench in front of the window. They sat down as Christine kept talking, never letting go of Meg's hand.
"What happened the night…the night of the fire?" asked Christine as she tried to hide the tone of fear in her voice, although Meg had noticed "Your mother said you went to stay with one of her friends, but we all thought that perhaps he had something to do with your whereabouts…"
"Not at all" Meg giggled weakly "I did go with a friend of Maman"
"I see that now!" laughed Christine happily "Now I really want to know everything about your new husband, my friend!"
Meg smiled "There's not much to tell about"
"You must tell me all the details" Christine encouraged "Where did you met him? Did you met him here? Maybe Raoul knows his family…"
Meg squeezed her hands and forced Christine to look at her. Christine fell quiet instantly, her attention on Meg.
"I met him the night of the fire" Meg explained quietly, looking at her intently.
Christine smiled as excitement appeared on her features "Did he help you escape? Oh! He went with you on that mysterious trip? How romantic!"
"Actually I was the one who helped him escape" Meg said carefully.
Christine drew back slowly, her expression revealing confusion and surprise as realization dawned in her. Meg let go of Christine's hands and began twisting the fabric of her skirts in an attempt to calm herself down.
"You-you mean…" Christine stuttered, not being able to finish the sentence.
"Yes" Meg whispered as she nodded slowly "I married the Phantom of the Opera"
Christine fell quiet, gazing to the distance, a lost expression in her eyes. Meg kept silent too, expecting her to say something first. Her heart pounded loudly, as if in any minute it would come out of her chest. Resisting the urge to stand up and run away, Meg glanced down to her lap, expecting her best friend to say something.
"How-How could you do that? After all he did to me?" Christine whispered, gazing up to stare directly to her eyes.
"He is a new man now, Christine" Meg explained quietly "He is different now-"
"No he is not" Christine answered coldly "He is dangerous! How can you be married to someone like him?"
"Someone like who?" demanded Meg, anger boiling in her veins all of a sudden "Tell me, someone like who? Someone who gave you everything, risked his life, dared to love and in the end was betrayed?"
Christine stood up, her delicate fists clenched tightly "Someone who kidnapped me, threatened me and Raoul-someone who killed, someone who is filled of hate and loathing?"
"How can you say that? Meg hissed as she stood up and approached Christine "How can you say that when all he did was for you?
"You really don't know how much I had to endure, do you?" whispered Christine, a tone of mock surprise.
"It was your fault" answered Meg coldly "You played with him and then broke his heart."
Christine was quiet for a moment, just to then gaze into her eyes once more "Are you sure he loves you?"
Meg remained silent, not being able to answer her question. Did he love her? She knew that he had strong feelings for her, but he had never said that he loved her. Something ached inside of her chest as fear began creeping over her body. She needed to leave she didn't wanted to be here, not when Christine was saying such things of the person she cared for the most. She didn't have the strength to fight back.
"How could you marry him?" whispered Christine "He vowed he loved me- how could he fall in love again so fast?"
"Because it wasn't love what he felt for you" stated Meg coldly, looking at her intently "It was anything but love"
"Are you sure?" asked Christine "Did he ever tell you everything he did for me? Did he ever tell you about the night he took me down to his lair? How he sang to me? How he embraced me? Did he ever say something about the wedding dress he made for me?"
Meg took a step back, blinking furiously as she tried to clear her vision "Stop it-"
"Did he tell you about what really happened the night of the fire? Did he tell you that he gave me a wedding ring? I kissed him, Meg, twice. And it was something that I will never forget, those two kisses really changed my entire existence" Christine took a step forward, her voice cold.
Meg turned around giving her back to her. Closing her eyes furiously she tried to ignore what Christine was saying, although it was impossible, not when they were in such a small room.
"The last thing he said to me was that he loved me"
Opening her eyes, she turned abruptly, tears falling freely down from her cheeks.
"I realize now that I really didn't know how much he loved you" Meg answered coldly "Or how much you both have really shared…not even that he had proposed to you"
Meg took a step forward, watching how Christine's expression changed to surprise.
"But let me tell you something" Meg hissed "I don't care what happened, because he has changed, and no matter what you say, I would still want to be with him."
And with that, she stormed out of the chapel, ignoring the voice of Christine calling for her. The instant she was out of her sight, Meg began running towards her dressing room, tears falling uncontrollably down from her cheeks. But Meg was unaware that there had been someone who had been listening to their confrontation, someone who was following her in the shadows of the tunnels.
When she closed the door of the dressing room, she leaned back against it and let all the tears come out, sobbing hard as she slowly crumbled to the floor. Why didn't she know anything about what Christine had said? Although she was trying to not feel any pain or jealousy, it was impossible. To know that Erik had done such things just for Christine was like a dagger straight to her heart. Trying to calm down, she stood up and walked to the trunk, opening it and taking out the music box. She kneeled on the floor once more, her body shaking with sobs as the monkey began playing a soothing tune instantly.
"He never said the words" whispered Meg between sobs as she caressed the head of the monkey softly.
Erik stood frozen behind the mirror, silent tears running down his cheeks. He had never imagined that Meg could be so strong to face her best friend, just to defend him. Every word that Christine said was like a blow straight to his face, and he could tell that Meg was feeling the same way he was. Just that she had to hide it. At some point Erik was tempted to walk out and defend Meg, hide her from all the vicious statements Christine mas making. Yes, he had done everything she had said, but Meg was right. It hadn't been for love.
Taking a step forward, he placed a hand over the mirror, not wanting anything but to step out and hold her in his arms, to tell her that everything would turn out fine. That he did care for her. He slowly knealt in front of the mirror, sobs shaking his body. His eyes were flooded with tears as he observed Meg crying on the floor. He watched as she stood up and walked towards the trunk weakly. His heart skipped a beat when he realized what she was holding. His music box. A flash of happiness flooded him when he realized that she had been down to his lair. To know that one of his favorite things was in her keeping made him somewhat happier, to know that she had something of him with her.
Hot tears kept rolling down from his cheeks as he observed her every move, fighting the urge to open the mirror and running to her side. But he needed to wait; he knew that if she knew he was there, she wouldn't allow him to speak to the authorities. It was then when he heard her speak, something that make his heart break into pieces "He never said the words". He never told her how much she meant to him, how important she had become to him in such a short amount of time. How his life would be over if she abandoned him. What he really felt for her, something that thrilled him and terrified him.
"I never told you"