Chapter Three: Remembering and Forgetting

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Harry Potter. I only own my plot, my OC and any other OC's that appear throughout this fanfic.

Anna P.O.V

I stretched my arms before getting up from bed. I didn't get back until almost midnight after my encounter with Cedric the other night. It was something that could've been avoided. Why am I so stupid sometimes? I looked to the bed across from mine only to find Cho still sound asleep. Oh Cho, sweet and innocent Cho. I hope you realize what you're doing with him. I never quite told her exactly what went down in fourth year. Despite the fact that she was, and still is, a very trusted friend, I don't know if she'd understand. She'd probably just judge me, get all mad, and side with Cedric. I know she'd be biased because of their relationship. Yuck! I think I just vomited in my mouth. Just thinking of being in a relationship with that nasty, slimy, no good prat would turn anyone mad.

Oh, who am I kidding? The whole female population of Hogwarts is head over heels for the Hufflepuff. Top of the class, popular, personable, Head Boy, not to mention good-looking. I chided myself for letting myself praise the git. No matter how many horrible things I could say about Cedric Diggory, the one thing I can't do is lie, lie about hating him forever. Truth is, it didn't start off this way. Believe it or not, we used to be good friends, might I even say best friends. My father always told me that sometimes people start off one way in the world, but then after life's through with them, they end up a different person. I had yet to figure out if that applied in a positive or negative sense because with me, it usually turned out to be a bad thing. Cedric was one of those "bad things".

Hell yes we used to be best friends. He and Cho were my two closest friends. Actually come to think of it, I'd say I was closer to Cedric than the Asian perfectionist. We became close when we were both chosen for Seekers on our houses' Quidditch teams. Every match was a time to compete, but after starting to get to know each other, we grew close. We began eating together at breakfast, meeting up after class, studying in the library together, and even going to Hogsmeade when our homework loads were light. Cho obviously noticed, but didn't mind. She was happy to see that I was finally branching out from our tight-knit duo. Again, I was a very awkward child. I never understood why Cedric Diggory would even give me the light of day.

Sure, I'd heard plenty of Cedric Diggory before even coming to Hogwarts. His father worked for the Ministry of Magic and was said to be a noble wizard. His son was only expected to be that, and much more. The thing about Cedric was that he was a genuine person, a trait hard to find in people. No matter how much pressure was on him to be the perfect person, he never gave in to what other people expected or wanted. He was always just himself.

Cho, quite honestly, never truly understood Cedric. She didn't understand why he did the things he did, why he never caved in, and so on. I often felt that perhaps she would never understand the friendship Cedric and I had. It puzzles me even more now because of the fact that they're together.

Somewhere along the way, I started to develop feelings for Cedric. I was a young teenage girl and he was the popular guy in school. Come on, it was inevitable. That complicated things even more when he started to have feelings for Cho. I was pissed beyond belief. Even though she was my good friend, I couldn't help but feel jealous of her being the one his heart longed for. I never told Cho of the feelings I harboured for him, the situation would just turn really ugly. To make matters worse, I got news from my parents regarding my brother. He was sick, and I don't mean "under the weather" or "has the flu", I meant sick, as in disease sick. I knew something was up one day when I got home school and my father was trying to sooth my mother out of an insane crying fit. The dinner table was quiet that night.

Garrett wasn't a wizard. We drifted farther apart, but still remained close through constant letters. One letter from my parents almost ended my life. I remember exactly what that letter said, the tears that went into writing each and every word. That was the day I found out my brother wouldn't live forever. I used to think that people could live forever, and I have a horrible combination of magic and poetry to thank for that belief.

That letter started the downfall of my fourth year. I stopped showing up to class, stopped talking to people. Consequently, my grades suffered greatly (which was odd because I'm a Ravenclaw) and so did my social life. I stopped talking to Cho and Cedric. Cho would try to get me out of my depressive state, but Cedric…Cedric let it happen. He didn't even try to ask what was going on. Popularity consumed him. When people asked me where he was, I always responded with a monotone, "I don't know, and I don't care." Yeah, people started to stay away from me, too. That was when I really turned to poetry. I started hiding behind my books and books of poetry to escape a world that was crashing down. I admit it, I became a loser. Nobody would talk to me, I wouldn't talk to anybody, I quit the Quidditch team, I flunked classes. It got to the point where casting Avada Kedavra on myself seemed like the best option. But there was something inside of me that told me to keep going. It was a little hope, but it would do for the time.

So, how does this relate to my hatred for Cedric now? Well, he eventually gave in, gave in to what everyone else in the world wanted. He became the Golden Boy, getting all the attention, and he basked in it. He loved the attention from the teachers, the girls, his friends, the entire student body! Cho was the one who gave him the most attention, and that still makes me fume inside. Just because I became Hogwarts' most unpopular, anti-social student doesn't mean I don't take notice of the things that go on. Anyway, one day I went to go study in the library, something I hadn't done in a very long time. I brought one of my poetry books just in case. When I finished up, I seemed to have left my poetry book on the table I was studying at. It didn't show up for a whole week. I started to get really worried. One weekend afternoon, when I was walking through the courtyard, I saw a large group of boys. And who else would be in the middle of it all other than the famous Cedric Diggory. The boys were cheering him on, and a red flag went on in my head. Something is definitely wrong. That's when I saw Cedric holding my poetry book. I probably looked like a statue to everyone around. I didn't move, as if my feet were permanently glued to the courtyard's stone floor. That's when one of his lunatic friends spotted me.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the loser herself. Anna, how nice of you to join us."

I didn't bother to look at anybody else. I just stared at Cedric who had a firm grip on my precious book.

"Cedric, please give me my book back. Please, you don't understand how much that book means to me…it's…it's…" I pleaded and begged, not caring if tears were already flowing freely down my face.

"Oh Cedric, please, please!" The friend who acknowledged me earlier mocked my desperate tone.

Cedric said absolutely nothing the whole time. He just looked at me, and then started laughing hysterically. He actually thought it was funny. So much for "best friend".

"Anna, it's just a book. Plus, we ALL know about your little crush on Ceddy here. Don't worry, though, only the ENTIRE school knows. Cedric told us all about the way you look at him with those green eyes of yours, the way you laugh at all his jokes, the way you try to hold his hand during those study sessions…"I could feel myself sniffling profoundly, my tears coming down like a waterfall. I noticed that when his friend said that, the smile was wiped off Cedric's face. He stopped laughing and kept looking at me. What was the look in his eyes? Pity? Sympathy? I couldn't tell. Did I care? I realized I no longer cared about his opinion.

Something inside me snapped. Don't ask what it was because I don't know if I'd be able to tell you. All I know is that I had the nerve to walk right up to his friend, and slap him right across the face. Talk about "wiping that smile off your face". He touched his cheek where I hit him, eyes enraged, and nostrils flared.

"Cedric! What the hell, do something!"

"What the hell am I supposed to do, Derrick?"

"Tell her off! People like her don't deserve to treat people like us like she just did."

People like us? What does that even mean? After slapping Derrick across the face, I had a newfound fire burning inside of me. I took that chance to confront Cedric Diggory himself.

"I don't know who the hell you or your friends think you are," I jabbed him hard in the chest with my finger. "But I think it's time YOU realize that the world doesn't revolve around Cedric fucking Diggory!" He visibly flinched at my language. I never swore in front of him before. "Learn that now before your head swells up ten times bigger than it already has! You may not care that you lost your best friend, considering everyone else around you is dying to become your new one, but I never thought I'd see the day when you, Cedric, would do something like this. I admired you because of your selflessness, your humility. I see that it was all just one big joke!" I snatched my poetry book from a very stunned looking Cedric. "Have a nice life. I know I will because you're no longer going to be a part of it." I stomped off, not even bothering to take one last look at the person who used to mean so much to me.

That was the last time I spoke to or saw Cedric before taking my leave after fourth year. Of course, the reason for my absence was out of my control. Death is never something you ask for, it's something that just comes.

I remember Garrett's funeral like it was just yesterday. I hope nobody caught my farewell speech to my big brother on video because I probably stopped to wipe my face about ten times. It was like I was the ocean, made of tons and tons of water. I chose to read my favourite poem out of my favourite poetry book, a.k.a. the book Cedric stole. That book was a gift from Garrett on my eleventh birthday. It was the one thing I had to remember him by. I wasn't kidding when I said that it meant so much to me.

Thank you all for gathering here today to help mourn the loss of my brother, Garrett. It really means a lot to me, especially to my parents…Garrett, you were my older brother. Not just because you came out two years earlier than I did, but because you were the one who took on the responsibility of taking care of me when Mom and Dad couldn't. You were my best friend, the one I talked to about all my problems, the one who beat up whoever hurt me, the one who never told anyone my secrets.

I remember when we were little kids and we accidently broke Mom's special vase from Grandma after a vigorous game of tag. We stashed all the pieces behind the sofa in the basement and blamed the whole thing on Cousin Elaine when she came over the following day. Sorry it took this long to admit, Mom.

On my eleventh birthday, Garrett gave me a beautiful book full of all my favourite poetry. He knew me all too well. This one in particular is my ultimate favourite. It's called "The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost.

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

You've taken your path, Garrett, even if you left me behind. I forgive you for ditching me like you used to in the playground. It'll be a hard road for me to take without having you by my side, big brother, but know that for you, it's a chance I'm willing to take. I love you.

Garrett's funeral was the day that poem became something much more to me than just a collection of words. It became a goal I had to achieve. I wasn't going to let his death, or Cedric Diggory, stop me from living my life, from chasing my dreams. I vowed to myself that day, June 25 of 2000 that I would do everything and anything I could to get myself back on track, no matter how many changes I'd need to make. That was the day I took a look at myself in the mirror, and decided I would work hard to perfect my face, my personality, my everything. It took a lot of work, but Garrett was always the one in my heart telling me to keep going. He was my inspiration.

I got dressed in a dark pair of skinny jeans, a white tank top, and a blue sweater. I slipped on some flats and looked at myself in the mirror. My wavy brown hair was tied in a loose plait that reached below my chest. Weekends were the best, a chance to get out of those itchy school uniforms. Cho was still fast asleep. I decided to go on to breakfast without her. She wouldn't mind anyway, it was Cho. Nothing ever gets her down. Besides, I was starving!

As I made my way to the Great Hall, I felt like I forgot to wear pants or something. People kept staring at me! Really people? You know who I am, I don't need this kind of attention! I caught the eyes of Marcus Flint and Draco Malfoy, in particular, boys that never used to give a damn about me. They looked me up and down, and I couldn't help but giggly and blush slightly. I guess I really did grow out of that "ugly duckling" stage. My dad's words suddenly rang through my head. "Stay away from the boys, Adrianna Summers." Not likely, I thought, as I absentmindedly sent a wink some seventh year Gryffindor's way.

I took an empty seat at the Ravenclaw table and began gobbling down a plate of fruit, bacon, eggs, and potatoes. I could care less about the people around me that would call me a pig or a slob. Screw them, right? I reached for the pepper shaker, and looked up momentarily, only to find all the eyes of the Great Hall on me. Instantly, the hall was filled with chatter and whispering. I chuckled to myself and shook my head, but not before seeing the distinct eyes of Cedric Diggory.

He looked like he was in deep thought. I remember that look one morning in third year when we had a big Potions test. He looked like he was going to pass out in class when he reached the essay questions. I laughed out loud, which startled him as it was the first sign of "friendliness" I'd given him since I arrived back. Then I remembered, I'm supposed to hate him, not act like we're buds. I immediately put on my straight face and went back to working on my food.

Forget about him Anna. Forget about it all.

I decided to insert this chapter because it explains the reason behind Anna's hate towards Cedric. It's characterization, right? Enjoy! Please read and review!

Oh, and I think I'll follow an alternation POV pattern between Anna and Cedric for the rest of the story!