Sorry this update took so long, I've been jumping through hoops to start up school again and haven't had the chance to just sit and write. Apologies!

The day had started off so nicely, with a pot of fresh coffee waiting for him when he woke up and a day that promised to be clear of any sort of creepy-crawlies, but right around eleven, things started to get weird. And if Dean Winchester, Hunter Extraordinaire and diner at the Buffet of Strange, thought things were weird then they bordered on being all kinds of mushroom-inspired crazy.

It had started with Cas fluttering in unexpectedly, his tie even more askew than normal and a smear of something black and gooey on his trench coat. He nodded at them, apparently out of breath, before he addressed them properly. "Hello."

"Ah, Cas?" Sam was sitting at the table, his fingers hovering above the keyboard, paused in their typing. "What happened to you?"

The Angel looked down at himself, quickly attempting to straighten his lost cause of a tie before he peered at the goo on his coat and frowned. "I found a job."

Dean, who had been attempting to salvage what remained of the morning by downing his not-quite-turpentine coffee, realized that it was all about to start going downhill at a breakneck speed. "What sort of job?"

"The sort of job we do…?" Cas' head tilt bordered on being expected at this point, as his tone indicated he wasn't sure what Dean meant by that, exactly. "There's a restless spirit inhabiting one of the graveyards near here, and I located it."

Sam arched his eyebrows, giving the Angel a looking over before he spoke. "A spirit did that to you?"

Cas again moved his hands to his tie, looking suddenly very uncomfortable, and Dean realized that he was embarrassed. "It took me by surprise." He mumbled at last, not looking at either of them.

Dean snorted, draining the last of his coffee and setting the mug on the table. "Well then, we better go salt this sucker."

"It won't be that easy, Dean." Cas spoke up, finally lifting his gaze to look the hunter in the eye. "I identified the woman who came after me, and I discovered she was already cremated."

"So then what the hell is left for her to be haunting with?" He asked, arms crossing over his chest. He didn't like cases that weren't straightforward; he preferred to salt and burn and get the hell out of Dodge, not hunt down some stray bit of DNA that was hanging around the place.

"I have Ariel looking into it."

At that point, Dean decided that maybe today couldn't get any weirder. That, of course, was before Ariel turned up with her newfound information. It took the Seraphim another thirty minutes to finish whatever it was she was doing and come back to the hotel, and by that time Dean had given up hoping for a normal day. Between Gabriel appearing out of nowhere with a question for Sam about some obscure ritual or another (Dean honestly didn't want to know why the Archangel needed to know), and Cas sitting in front of the TV watching cartoons, his afternoon began with crazy, and escalated to pure insanity.

When Ariel did arrive, looking a bit disheveled with Ectoplasm smeared clear across one cheek; she looked between the three of them and then returned her gaze to Cas. "Can you please go get your brother off his backside and have him take Sam to the cemetery?"

Dean opened his mouth, ready to protest, but Sam beat him to it. "Gabriel's off doing some ritual or other…" He gestured vaguely, and Dean could have sworn he saw a flush slink up the back of his brother's neck.

"Oh, right," Ariel blinked several times in quick succession before she looked between the two brothers, "well then, who wants to deal with the ghost?"

Sam was on his feet before Ariel had even finished speaking, and he gestured towards Cas. "We got this. You look like you could take a break anyway…" He shot Dean a significant look (one that screamed for him to do something, but the something in question was rather vague), and headed for the door, Cas quickly standing and switching off the television before he followed.

The silence that followed their departure was only a little awkward, and Dean finally decided to break it. "You gonna just leave that black goo there, or do you plan to do something about it?" And no, it wasn't his smoothest line ever, but he could live with that.

Ariel lifted a hand to her face, fingers brushing just under the smear of black, and she let out a huff of air that could almost be considered a laugh. "I forgot that was there…" She tipped her head towards the bathroom and arched an eyebrow at the Hunter. "Do you mind…?"

He shook his head quickly, and she moved off towards the bathroom. "So what spirit is it you sent our siblings after?" He asked after a short pause.

"Oh, just a restless spirit, nothing much…" Her voice filtered out of the bathroom to him as he heard the water begin running into the sink. "They should be back in an hour or two."

He hadn't meant to say it, when she first appeared in the room. He'd meant to keep the awkward question to himself and let her keep her secrets. But then the question had fallen from his lips before he had the chance to stop it. "What did it feel like?" She peered around the doorframe of the bathroom at him, an eyebrow arched in silent question, and Dean felt his heart start to pound, because this was not how he intended to have this conversation (he had envisioned there being a lot more alcohol involved, actually). But this, with the awkward silence stretching between them and her green eyes glued to his, this is not what he had been planning. "When Gabe died." He clarified, and instantly he wished he hadn't.

Her whole posture changed, from the way she was looking at him to the way her fingers curl in the fabric of the washcloth she was holding, and her eyes hardened in a way he knew all too well. "How do you think it felt, Dean?" Her tone is so hard as to be almost painful to listen to, but the Hunter presses on.

"I know, I mean…" He paused, trying to shake off her sharp gaze, and then continued in a softer tone. "When another Angel dies, how does it feel? Does it hurt, like an actual physical pain, or do you just have to deal with the grief of it?"

Her gaze softened slightly, and her posture relaxed into one that impresses upon him only mild disapproval, and she tipped her head slightly to one side, considering for a moment before she replied. "I suppose there is a… twinge, of sorts. When an Angel's Grace leaves a vessel quickly, there's a sort of energy wave that accompanies it." She pauses again, and Dean can see the way her eyes lose focus, as though she's looking at something through him. "It was more of a tug, for me. I was still in heaven at the time, so I couldn't feel it as forcefully as, say, one of the Angels on earth… But yes. There was a physical hurt that came from his passing." Her gaze refocused onto him, and she smiled sadly. "Does that answer your question?"

He can't look at her, can't stand to see the expression in her eyes that he's far too familiar with, from seeing it in the mirror more times than he'd like to count. He can see it, in his mind, the shock on her face, the wide eyes and slack jaw as the realization that her brother is gone dawns on her, and he doesn't even care about the fact that she wouldn't have looked the way she does now, because he's starting to have trouble dividing Annie from Ariel, the same way he struggles to separate Jimmy and Cas.

He can hear her screams in his mind, and he can't shut out the sounds of her sobs as they fill the conference room of the hotel, he can see her rocking back and forth with Gabriel's head in her lap, her whispered words of sorrow slipping past her lips in Enochian. He can see her tip her head towards the heavens and demand an answer from a Father who has long been silent. He can feel how she felt.

He snapped his gaze back up to meet hers, and catches the tear that's slipped from her eye, trailing idly down her cheek. "I'm sorry," she managed faintly as she wiped away that stray tear, "Gabe always told me I shared too much…"

"He was right." That seems to do the trick, because she manages a faint smile and dips her head, hiding what may very well be a few more stray tears that are making a break for it. "But I can't say I really mind."

She snaps her head back up so fast he has to suppress a wince, and the look on her face is one of complete surprise. "Really?"

He grins. "I went to Hell and Purgatory," he reminds her with a chuckle, "I think I can handle a few Seraphim-induced emotions for a handful of seconds."

She manages another small smile, looking perhaps a little less sad, and he feels better for it. "I'm still sorry." Her gaze softens, and as she wipes at the last vestiges of Ectoplasm on her cheek, she tips her head to one side again. "For a lot of things, actually."

It's another impulse of his that he can't seem to stop, and before he quite knows what he's doing, he's across the room and taking the washcloth from her, wiping gently at a spot of Ectoplasm that she'd managed to miss right by her ear. "Don't know what you have to be sorry for, exactly, not much of this is your fault."

She held still, letting him wipe at the side of her face, and smiled faintly. "I left Cas to the wilds of the world and the whims of his brothers, I let you and Sam go about trying to save the world without help… I let things happen, Dean. Even unconsciously, that still makes them my fault."

"You couldn't have known." He breathed softly, needing her to not blame herself. He needed her to not feel like it was all her fault, because it honestly wasn't. "And even if you had, the hell were you meant to do about it?"

She fidgeted on the spot as he finally managed to wipe away the last vestiges of black goo and hand the washcloth back to her. "I should have looked sooner, Dean. I shouldn't have hidden for so long." He gave her a slightly confused look, and when she realized she hadn't followed her train of thought, she sighed softly and began to explain. "In Heaven, in my true form, my wings hide me from view." She held up two fingers, managing another small smile. "Two to cover my eyes, two to cover my body, and two to cover my feet. In essence, I'm a floating mass of feathers, and I only peer between the cracks when I am called to do so." Her hand fell back to her side, and her gaze lowered to where Dean knew his tattoo was hiding just below the collar of his shirt. "I hadn't heard my Father's voice in so long, I…" She shook her head. "I stopped caring what my siblings did. And then, when they called, I was too foolish to do anything."

"When who called?" He asked; picking the first question that fell to the tip of his tongue.

"Gabriel, actually." She shook her head, letting out another huff of laughter. "He always was persistent… But so gentle, under all that armor he wore." Her gaze softened as she paused, and he saw her eyes once again lose focus. "But by that time… He'd already left, and his prayers pulled me out of the daydream I'd been living in." She looked up at him, and the guilt was plainly written in her eyes. "I let them all down, Dean. And I'll never be able to fix that."

He opened his mouth to object, to tell her they were her family, and she shouldn't think that way, but before he got the chance, the door behind him opened, and Ariel vanished into thin air. "Dammit!" He hissed; glaring at the spot she'd only just been occupying.

"Dude, what'd you say to her?" Sam asked; the smirk audible in his tone.

"I do not believe Dean is responsible for her sudden departure…" Cas put in gently. "She has been known to drop everything in order to answer another call." He sounded like he knew that from experience, and Dean decided not to press the subject, hoping that's really all it was.

The last thing he needed on his case was a pissed-off Celestial Being.

Gabriel didn't even have to look up when he heard the tell-tale flutter of wings fill the apartment in Paris he'd picked out for himself, there really was only one person it could be. He'd spent a lot of time hiding from his siblings, but there'd always been one who could find him when the time came. "What's the matter, chickadee?" He asked off-handedly, turning the page of his paper and pretending to read the curling script of the headline. "Those boys get a little too friendly? You want me to roast 'em like chestnuts over an open fire?" He tipped a corner of the paper down and grinned at her over the top of it. "Cause I would, you know."

The little monologue had earned him a chuckle, and his grin softened a little at the corners as she moved across the room and perched on the corner of the velvet ottoman his feet were propped up on. "No, Gabe, that won't be necessary."

She had a nervous, distant look in her eyes that he didn't like, and he gently nudged her with one foot, an eyebrow arching. "Hey, what's wrong? You don't look too good."

She shook her head, as though trying to dispel whatever was bothering her, and offered him a strained smile. "Sorry, just remembering."

Gabriel felt something cold and unpleasant pool in the bottom of his stomach, and he folded his paper back properly, plopping it into his lap before he spoke. "Now sis, what have I told you about that?" He clicked his tongue disapprovingly, giving her a look. "No good ever comes of it, you know that."

"I know," she replied so softly he almost didn't hear her, "but Dean brought something up, and now I can't… I can't seem to stop."

He could feel it from here, the crackling dissonance in her Grace that told of something being truly wrong. It twisted at odd angles, and changed densities, as though not sure whether to be a shield or an escape route, and Gabriel unconsciously reached out to brush against it with his own. A faint hum greeted him, and the crackling slowly began to calm, like the receding thunder after a storm has passed. He frowned slightly, looking her over closely. "What exactly did Thing One say to you?"

That earned him a slight smirk, and she shrugged. "He asked how it felt to lose you."

Gabriel's whole posture seemed to slump, his eyes going soft as he watched her gaze trail away from his face and onto a spot on the cream carpet below them. "Oh, Ariel…"

"Oh no you don't," she reprimanded gently, her gaze still not quite meeting his, "don't you oh Ariel me, Gabe. I've been looking after myself for quite some time already, thank you, and I can still do so now."

"But you shouldn't have to." He replied, sitting up straight and leaning closer across the space that divided them. "For once, you should sit back and let your little brothers pamper you, because it's about time we did!" He fixed his best disapproving look onto her and continued in a softer tone. "You stitched me back together from dust, Ariel; the least I can do is look out for you now and again."

She laughed softly, and he could smell the tang of salt on the air from unshed tears in her eyes. "Okay." She breathed out at last. "I think I need to be looked out for now, please."

Gabriel decided being flashy wasn't necessary around his big sis, and instead stood up and walked around to stand behind her, his hands landing lightly against her shoulders and giving the tense muscles there a gentle squeeze. "All you had to do was ask."

She leaned into the touch just slightly, sighing as she felt the tension drain from her slowly. "Do you blame me, Gabriel? For what our brothers did to each other?"

The Archangel felt that same cold feeling slide back into his stomach, and he tried his hardest to push it away as he replied. "Dad, is that really what you think? C'mon, Ari, you know that's not true." He smoothed his hands along her shoulders, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of her head. "Those asshats did what they did of their own accord; you had nothing to do with it." He squeezed her shoulders tightly, giving them a gentle shake as though trying to shake some sense into her. "Besides, they only listened to Dad because they were terrified of him… If you'd stepped up, you would have been torn to shreds."

"And then where would you have been?" She asked softly, a teasing tone in her voice. He chuckled softly, rubbing her shoulders again gently, and she let her eyes flutter shut. "I tried, you know. I tried to stop them. But Raphael was so… Insistent." She let out a breathy sigh as Gabriel found a knot in her shoulder and started to work it out of the muscle. "He locked me up when I didn't fight back, when I told him I wasn't willing to kill my family." Her head tipped forward as Gabe's thumbs started to work up the back of her neck, and her next words were slightly muffled. "When I told him he would never sit on our Father's throne while I still protected it."

The Archangel's hands stilled against her neck, feeling her pulse quicken beneath the skin, and the nervous bob of her Adam's apple as she swallowed down a sob.

"I told him no, Gabriel, and he reacted like a petulant child and threw a tantrum." She shook her head slowly, her shoulders curving forward as she bit back more tears. "And when I came back, when I was released from my cell… I walked into a Paradise I no longer recognized."

He gave up his position at her back, instead moving around to look her in the eye, tipping her face back up so that he could smile down at her gently. "Not. Your. Fault." He said in a tone that a kindergarten teacher might use on a disobedient child. "Just because our bastard brothers decided to wreck the playground while you were in time-out does not mean you have to feel guilty about it." He smirked. "Besides, the teacher's been gone far too long… You can't be expected to keep all those naughty children in line all by yourself."

She laughed at that, shaking her head at his antics before she smiled up at him. "I'll take that as the stop worrying, Ariel that it's meant to be."

He tapped the end of her nose with a wink. "That's my girl. Now come on, let me give you a real massage." He grinned. "Your feathers are still ruffled, let me smooth 'em out for you."

She rolled her shoulders experimentally, glancing back into thin air before she looked back up at him. "It has been some time since they've been properly groomed…"

Gabriel beamed at her. "Perfect!"

Dean was staring at his mug, a dejected look on his face at the sad fact that it was now empty, and wondering why he was once again alone in the hotel room. He understood Sam ditching to go get food, that made perfect sense, but did Cas really have to go see his big brother just because the Archangel had snapped his fingers and asked for a favor?

Somewhere along the way, Dean felt like he'd become the kid on the playground that no one wanted on their team. It wasn't a particularly nice feeling.

He let out a dejected sigh, standing up and moving towards the coffee maker in the corner of the room, before he heard the sound of wings fill the air and the soft whump of something landing on the bed. He turned at the sound, surprised and a little uncertain of what had made it, and felt his eyebrows arch when he saw Ariel looking at him from the bed.

"You look… odd from this angle." She pronounced after a moment, tipping her head to one side. She was on her back, her head hanging off the edge of the bed, and the tips of her hair nearly touching the grimy carpet on the floor. "Not bad," she continued in that same slightly slurred tone, "but certainly odd."

"The hell happened to you?" Dean asked after the span of about a heartbeat, taking in the contentedly blissful look on her face, and the idyllic smile on her lips.

"Had a massage." She replied promptly, stretching her arms out over her head, the backs of her hands grazing over the floor. "Let Gabriel groom my wings. Now I feel all…" She trailed off, wiggling her fingers as she looked for the proper word. "Fluffy."

Dean choked on a laugh as he continued to look at her. "Fluffy? You sure you're not on something?"

She looked at him with the widest, brightest green eyes he'd ever seen, the innocence on her face akin only to Cas'. "I am on something, Dean. I'm on your bed."

He pinched the bridge of his nose with a faint sigh, closing his eyes. "Yes, Ariel, I noticed. I meant narcotics." He looked up again when he heard her giggle and fly across the room, suddenly inches from his face. Her head was tipped off to the side again, her gaze so intense Dean had a hard time looking back at her, pinning him against the low table at his back by her proximity.

"Unless you count as a drug, I don't think that applies to me." Her words were less slurred, probably because she was vertical this time around, but they were said with an undercurrent of emotion that Dean recognized all too well. She leaned in a little closer, forcing him to lean back, and her lips quirked upwards into a grin. "Why does your heart pound like that, Dean?" She asked suddenly, gaze fixed onto the pulse point on his neck. "Am I doing that?"

"You are kinda close, Ariel. Personal space and all that…"

"You never complained before." She pointed out, slowly pulling away. "And I think I know why…" Her gaze softened, flitting over his face before it returned to his eyes. "Are you ever going to stop feeling responsible for what happened?" One of her hands landed on his chest, right over his heart. "Are you ever going to let it go?"

"I can't." The admission was practically dragged from his lips, his voice little more than a harsh whisper. "I've tried, Ariel, but I can't." Memories were flooding into him, memories from Purgatory, where he fought tooth and nail to keep his head above the water and not drown, memories of before, of everything he'd gone through, everything he had tried to forget, but hadn't managed to. Of the Pit and turning the knife on other people, of losing Sammy, of having Hell Hound tear into him and drag him into the darkness. "They won't leave me alone."

He jumped slightly when her forehead landed gently against his, a warm pressure against his skin. "Do you want to forget?"

And it was such a tempting offer, such a simple thing to agree to and hope it turned out alright. To simply wipe the slate clean and forget all the crap he'd been put through, all the pain and the tears and the scars left on his soul. "I wish I could." He bit back a sob, the pain evident in his voice. "But I can't."

"Let me do something, then," she offered instead, "let me help you, Dean."

He chuckled, about to ask what she had in mind, but he never got the chance. A warm pair of lips landed against his forehead, the motion so foreign it took him a moment to realize what it was, and he felt heat flood through him. It wasn't a burning, searing heat, the sort he associated with stab wounds and broken bones, but a comforting heat. The kind you got when you downed good bourbon, or curled up in bed on a rainy day. It flooded into his muscles and bones, crackled pleasantly across his skin and made him shiver, danced along his spine and curled softly against his insides. Her hand was still over his heart, and he felt heat flood there too, working through the chambers of the organ before it flooded out into the rest of his system, burning brightly as it went.

He held his tongue until the sensation had faded to a gentle hum in the back of his mind, his skin returning to its usual temperature. "The hell was that?"

"A cleansing." She replied promptly, her voice back to its usual brisk tone. "About time, too…" She tapped a forefinger over his heart. "Ticker had nearly stopped ticking."

"You… Did you just heal me?" He wanted to be perfectly clear about what had just happened before he went and did anything reckless.

"More or less." She shrugged, looking him over. "I can't do anything about your eyes," she mused softly, running a thumb over his cheekbone, "but at least the scars aren't on your skin anymore." She gave him a soft smile before she pulled away. "Call me if you need me, won't you?" Dean heard the key turning in the lock of the hotel room as though it were coming from a mile off. "After all," Ariel breathed out just before the door opened, "you are the one who asked me to stay."

For a fraction of a second, Dean thought he saw her wings as she flew off, the sound somehow more pronounced than before, and then Sam was walking in the door and looking around with a puzzled expression. "Dude, did you have company?" He asked with an arched eyebrow, setting the provisions down onto the table and kicking the door closed.

"Yeah," he replied faintly, "had one of the winged wonders swing by for an update." He shook his head to clear it, and then turned his attention back onto his brother. "So what'd you bring me?"

Sam rolled his eyes, deciding not to pry into whatever moment his big brother had been having, and tossed him a wrapped burger. "Enjoy."

Castiel was partway across the parking lot of the dingy little motel the brothers were camped out at when a hand caught at the sleeve of his coat, and he instinctively turned towards the being responsible for the action.

Ariel gave him a slight smile, the expression a bit lopsided as she tipped her head to one side, and tugged his sleeve a little harder. "I think they've had enough of our kind for one night, Cas," she nodded off towards the empty car park, "but I have an idea I think you'll like."

He dutifully followed her, letting her hand slip from the corner of his sleeve she'd grabbed to fit her fingers in between his own. She led him clear across the parking lot, and it was only when they started to move across the main road and into the residential area across from them that he thought to ask where it was they were headed.

She pulled up short, as though only just realizing herself that she hadn't explained her plan, and instead of telling him, dragged him on a quick flight through the air. When they stopped, they were perched on top of the water tower about a mile from the motel, the cool night air swirling around them gently as they both tried to find their balance and settle comfortably on the metal structure.

From here, Cas could see the lights of downtown in the distance, and all the land that lay between them and the bustling streets. And if he tipped his head back, he could see the stars stretched out above him in the wide arc of the sky, all glittering like tiny diamonds set into midnight blue velvet. Each with a name and a purpose, and a chemical make-up that defined how brightly they would shine and exactly when they would burn out. It was beautiful.

"I've missed watching the stars." Ariel admitted softly, as though it were some deep secret she'd kept buried. "Missed doing a lot of things I used to do."

"Do you miss Heaven?" Cas' voice was nearly lost in the whispering wind, his tone was so soft, but Ariel still heard him.

"Not as much as I would miss Earth." She replied after a pause, turning her gaze back onto him. "Not as much as I would miss you."

Something warm swam through Castiel's chest at those words, and he felt the corners of his mouth pick up just slightly. "I don't really see what there is to miss with me… I am not the best of our siblings…"

"You were always my favorite, though." She admitted with a sly grin. "And Michael always told me I shouldn't have favorites, because it wasn't fair, but I think he was just jealous."

If they'd been manifested, Castiel thought his wings may have ruffled with pride at that comment. "Why did you take such a liking to me? I am the least of our Father's children…" And although he meant it because he was merely a Messenger with no title, he meant it in a few other ways as well.

"You were… Stunning." She replied, turning her eyes back onto the skyline. "That first time we met, I couldn't stop staring, and that's something, coming from me." She let out a soft giggle at the memory. "And Balthazar looked traumatized, because you weren't supposed to talk to us, no one really was, but I didn't mind." He'd forgotten her hand was still entwined with his until she gave it a gentle squeeze. "You had eyes that told stories, Castiel… Eyes that were ready to drink in all the wonders our Father had made and cherish each of them." She grinned then, turning just enough to send him a wink. "And perhaps cherish a few more than most."

Cas imagined that, had Dean been present, he would have blustered through an annoyed string of expletives at that, but the Angel knew well enough by now to simply take the comment in stride. After all, it would be foolish to argue a fact that was so obviously true. "You say that as though it were a problem that needs solving…"

"Hardly." She replied with a shrug. "I just think it's entertaining that of all the people you chose to stick around with, you picked those two." She shook her head as though resigning herself to some terrible truth before she turned back to look at him, her expression suddenly serious. "Which reminds me… I know what you told Dean."

Castiel was about to ask and what was it I told him, before he saw the look in her eyes and knew exactly what she was talking about. "I see. I take it you share his view on the subject?"

"If by that you mean I think you're an idiot for threatening to harm yourself, then yes, we're of a like mind." She held onto his hand a little tighter, as though she could squeeze the idea out of his very flesh. "You realize, don't you, that if you decided to do that, I'd bring you right back again."

"The thought had occurred to me, yes." He admitted softly, still uncomfortable under the scrutiny of her gaze.

"Good. Because I don't care how long it takes me, I will put you back together again." Her voice dropped an octave or so, and she ran her thumb over the back of his hand. "I made a diamond out of dust once, Cas, I will be more than willing to do it again."

He smiled at that, giving her hand in his a slight squeeze. "And I appreciate it."

She brightened instantly, releasing his hand in order to lie back with her hands behind her head and look up at the stars. "Right then, time for a game. First one to name thirty stars wins." She grinned at him. "Think you can beat me, little brother?"

He matched her position, his hands instead resting against his stomach, and smiled slightly. "No… But I think I will still try."

Admit it... You'd love to lie under the stars with Cas. XD

Like I said, I'm sorry it took so long to get this chapter up, but the next will probably come after a bit of a break as well. School starts tomorrow, and I have very strict instructions about paying attention in class and keeping my grades up, but never fear! I shall not abandon you completely!

The song "That's What You Get" belongs to: Paramore