This chapter was a pain in the ass to write. This chapter is going to be a little different, and a bit longer due to heavy dialogue. A lot of things are going to surface, so pay attention! Haha.
Thank you again for the wonderful reviewers.
NiceStories; I find myself doubting my ability to carry a story, and feel that if there isn't constantly something going on, that I'll lose interest and so will the reader. I normally only write short stories and oneshots to prevent that, but this story means so much to me that it's very much appreciated to hear such kind words. Thank you so much, as always.
ninjamidori; I know! Things are going to be changing for everyone, soon.
Anime Lady PIMP; I've seen so many documentaries on the subject that it's mind blowing how that happens. But, in all honesty, the people that survive with the attachment, are lucky in comparision to some.
It's a horrible catch 22. D:
crim5on cr0w; thank you sweetheart! I try to update at least once a day. Sometimes, I can get a couple of chapters posted.
I'm rushing to get through the next couple of chapters to get to a treat for you guys!
Chapter 9
Puzzle Pieces.
Dreams.
They were supposed to hang the moon, not smear bloody prints across the stretching of your sleep. No. They were nightmarish, orchistrating attacks in the lull of supposed peace.
Yet, as they made her eyes stir, rubbing them with the backs of her hands, she felt at ease. She awoke where she had closed her eyes, tucked beneath InuYasha's chin. Her heart echoed in her ears, as she inspected his sleeping face.
He'd probably stopped his mind from running at its steady pace long enough to breathe. Every wrinkle in his skin told a story, a rugged, work-worn tale of love and loss. She admired the heavenly pallor of his hair, gingerly silking her finger through the long cord that ran across his chest.
The morning light peeked through door, warming their skin with its golden hands. How she longed to never move, to just exist as she had. That was all a memory, locked up tightly in the back of her head.
The mess around them didn't seem as bad now that there was morning to chase away the demons, which the night had brought. Kagome furrowed her brows, knitting her hands into her savior's shirt. She clung to him like a child, hoping that she could find what little trust he offered.
The movement made him stir, as he looked down upon her dark crown, feeling her breathing out of synch with his. His long arm draped around her, making her flinch.
A wince creased across her face, as she hid within him. She didn't speak, didn't find the strength to move any more than she already had.
InuYasha let out a sigh and gently ran a thumb across her back. He was trying to wake himself from the sore, groggy grasp sleep still had on him.
"You feeling okay, Kagome?" The man's tired voice rumbled. His eyes fell on the cleaning still left to be done and he grimaced.
Kagome shook her head softly, "I don't want to be here, InuYasha. I can't see my family." She said, hoarse and vacant. "I-I want to, but not like this."
A frown hit his face, "You know you should. They've been holding on for you. That's the only thing that kept them going." He said sternly, as if trying to coax her into being strong.
The girl wanted to cry, but couldn't force the tears to come. She was drier than an old well, devoid of moisture which once was rampant.
"I can't, I need a few days. This is so strange. I can't understand it." Kagome said, straightened herself, removing her body from his.
Part of him wanted to grab her, pull her back to him. She fit against his body like she should and it pained him to watch her push herself to her cracked feet.
A sigh escaped him and he followed her lead, save for his movement was far more lethargic. "What are we going to do about the house? Kaede-baba will be back soon. She always comes back before noon." InuYasha said, rubbing the kinks out of his neck.
Kagome hugged herself, circulating with anxiety. Her gray eyes were wide, searching for an answer. She knew this place wasn't really their home. It was a reminder of things that wouldn't change.
Loss and escape had lead them here. Their lives hadn't started here, they sure as hell deserved better after all they had been through.
Clenching her fists, Kagome ran into the kitchen, flipping on the eye on the gas stove. She jerked the knob on the oven, flinging it open to fill the space with the familiar, pungent odor.
InuYasha stiffened. It only took him a moment before he registered what she was trying to do, and flung himself over the counter top. His landing was unstable, sending him rolling off the sink pit onto the floor.
The girl was beside herself, lost in whatever sense of justification she had. Her hands frantically searched a drawer, looking for matches when InuYasha's hands clamped down on her arms.
He turned the girl to face him, shaking her forcefully. "What the fuck do you think you're doing, Kagome?" His voice growled as she kicked the oven door shut with her foot.
He wanted her to make eye contact so badly that he could slap her. What in hell made anyone think of burning down their home? It may have been what he had gone through that made him so intense, but it still didn't change that she had lost her mind.
Kagome forced him off of her as she let out a strangle cry. She flipped off the oven, slamming her hands down onto the counter. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"
InuYasha was baffled. "Do you think I have any more answers than you do? I have no idea what's going on! You just magically show up back here and I'm supposed to know what to do with you?" He asked, his hands contorting in front of his body.
Kagome turned to face him, mouth ajar with contempt. "After what I've beent through, you really think I care if you're here or not? I don't even know you and you expect to think that you're going to take care of me like I'm a child?"
Rage, blind rage boiled beneath the man's skin. This woman was going to be the death of him. He was about to scream at her, holding it back just enough to show the violence in his eyes. He had longed for the moment to see her, basked in the innocence he had dreamt she had...
But, this was who she was now.
Kagome was testing him. Her eyes narrowed on him as though he would submit to her, and when he didn't, fear creased the lining of her stomach with its nauseating waves.
"Look," InuYasha gritted, "I don't have time to play these games. I am not Bankotsu and I am not the person who did these things to you. I am just living here because of your family. You aren't anything like I imagined you to be." The man spat, recoiling at the intensity of his words.
He was being callous. He knew that being brash with her wasn't helping the situation get any better.
The look of hurt that struck her face was evidence enough to prove that point.
Her hands fumbled with the knob on the stove, turning it off. She didn't want him to look at her any longer. She'd tried to move past him only for his hand to latch on to her wrist. The touch had been gentle, has if merely keeping her from running off and hurting herself in the mess.
Kagome's eyes nervously met his and he calmed himself. "Are you hungry?" He asked her softly, noticing how waifish her frame was. She reminded him so much of himself it hurt.
The girl slipped her hand passed his fingers and cupped it within her own. "Yes," She said, "I'm starving. I haven't really eaten much lately." She smiled sadly, before she heard a familiar ring that made her blood run cold.
InuYasha looked to the living room where he and Bankotsu had tussled. A light flickered on and off, like a signal. Kagome looked up and him and pattered across the room to find it. He followed her, looking down at the couch.
With a heavy grunt, InuYasha skidded it across the floor, finding a cellphone crying to be answered. Kagome's mouth twitched beneath the weight of her frown. That device carried evil within the wiring.
InuYasha knelt down and picked it up, watching until the backlight dimmed. He slid it open, looking at the missed call. It didn't have any name attached to it, just a series of numbers.
Kagome looked up at him, her teeth chewing at her lip. "You have his wallet, don't you?" She asked.
InuYasha nodded, scrolling through all of the entries. Most of the calls were to and from the same set of three numbers. There was one that stuck out from the others, a local number. He hadn't had the luxury of using a phone in the past few weeks, but he recalled this one belonged to the shop Kagome and Hojo had worked at.
InuYasha figured Bankotsu was checking to see if the old pair still lived in the inn.
Kagome knitted her brows, looking out the door at the wind chime that sang against the silence.
"Bankotsu was supposed to take over his father's company before he was forced to go under." The girl said, "He was devastated that he couldn't make the money his father had. Then again, they were running weapons from China." A shrug rolled across her shoulders.
InuYasha tensed, shutting the celluar and stuffed in his pocket. "I know that." He said tersly. "We can at least use the phone to keep ahold of Kaede-baba."
Kagome mulled over what he had said and felt an uneasiness rising. "What do you mean that you know?"
The man waved her off, trying to suppress a memory. "I did have to talk to him, didn't I?" He responded, his mind warring to keep his past behind him. What had occured in Tsukiji was beyond him now.
Everything that he had worked so hard for was a sham. When Kanagawa's company floundered, he had been the first cut made. It had mostly been his fault that their activity had found out.
Closing his eyes, he bathed in the blackness behind them. He wanted to feel nothing. Holding on to the man's affects made him feel sick. Bankotsu was probably washed well past the inlay of rocks that stood tall against the edge of the bay.
His hand ran through his hair as he looked at the girl. He licked his lips and structured a brick facade to keep her leering eyes at a distance. "Let's get some food in you and we'll call Kaede, alright? I'm not going to run off with you or anything, just please trust me."
Kagome stared with uncertainty for a moment, before she went and found a pair of her old jeans. They were skin-tight, uncomfortable. She'd frowned at how tiny she was when she was a teenager, not to think she had seen better days now.
InuYasha waited for her on the porch, smoking a bitter cigarette. It made him feel dizzy, relieved, and ill at the same time. When he flicked it, the woman joined him on the slick porch, still wearing his shirt like a dress.
There was something about that man that she couldn't put her finger on. She knew that Bankotsu was no good, but InuYasha was a little different. There was a kindred soul that laid beneath his skin.
She knelt down to tie her old green tennis shoes, adjusting the red fishing twine. Always had she found it to be a romantic gesture, keeping her right foot connected to a tether that would eventually tie her to someone else.
Little did she know that she was walking beside the other owner of the thread.
In Tokyo, Sango awoke to the hum of a clock. Shippo coiled around her like a spring, smothering her skin with a sweaty heat. It took her a few moments to peel him off of her, but she managed to slip past his tiny hands, replacing her body with Buyo's.
Ayame had been too tired to really socialize when they had arrived. Dressing herself in some of the woman's pre-pregnancy clothes, she shuffled across her apartment. It was the exact same as she had remembered it.
Clean, not a speck of dust to be found anywhere. The floor was glossy, polished as if someone had spent hours cleaning it. The hallway was an open mouth, leading to two other rooms, larger than the entirity of Sango's entire home.
As she rounded the corner, she found Ayame sitting at marble island in the kitchen. The woman smiled crookedly, as if unsure of the intent of her guest.
"Morning, Sango." She said, sipping on a freshly made smoothie. "I made you some coffee, it's over there." Her long fingers waved to a pot on the slick counter, with a cup waiting for the woman.
"Thank you. It's been a rough couple of days." Sango sighed, pulling her hair over her shoulder before she poured herself some of the steaming liquid.
"Oh?" Ayame said, "Well, you're here now and that's all that matters." Her voice was soft, hinted with a loving tone.
Sango took a seat across from her, staring at her brilliantly colored hair. She was always a Shibuya girl and she doubted that would ever change. Her eyes were already heavily lacquered with false lashes and layers of powder and liner.
Her stomach was hidden beneath the lip of the island, keeping the rounding curvatures a secret.
Sango found this visit to be awkward, heavily wrapped within a nervous habitual promise to do so.
The woman looked up from her magazine to wrinkle her nose at her guest. "So, did you adopt that little boy?" She asked almost curtly.
Sango shook her head, waving a hand in defeat. "I'm watching him for his father. He wanted to come so badly that I just brought him along with me. I'm sorry if it bothers you." She apologized.
"Sango, you know I love children. What's the boy's name?" She asked curiously, "Is his father's hair like that pretty color?
Sango's hands found her lap, "No. It's actually he adopted father. Both of his parents passed away and he was kind enough to take him in. Shippo and InuYasha have been through so much."
"The Ito boy had a son? Hm, I figured Miroku would have told me. I can't believe that man is still alive." Ayame gawked, amazed by hearing that name. There had only been one person she'd ever heard with that same and she was just sure it was him.
Sango blinked, knowing that InuYasha had lived in Tokyo until the past year. It would have made sense with his job and all to know a lot of people. But the one thing that stood out in her mind, before anything else, was Miroku.
Her cheeks darkened and her eyes fell to the floor, before raising back to Ayame's in stealth. "So, how is he anyway?"
Ayame's eyes rolled, "He doesn't live here anymore. I told him to leave. I've just been so dissatisfied with him. I don't care if he feels differently. This entire ordeal was just too much for someone like him to handle."
It was like he had meant nary a thing to her.
Sango's chest pounded. "I'm sorry, Ayame. What about the baby?" She pointed to her friend's robust stomach.
"Pfft, I'm perfectly capable of taking care of him. My little Ginta is going to be just fine. Besides, I've been seeing someone else, actually, for a while now. I'm not even sure that the baby is his." Ayame sighed. She didn't hold any shame, just remorse for not knowing whether or not she had to deal with him any longer.
Sango furrowed her brows and bit her lip. "Really? Did he know that you were having an affair?"
"Obviously. It's not like he could keep his pants on." Her eyes lingered over Sango. "Ah, well, its all in the past and I don't have to deal with anymore of his bullshit. People think I'm being cruel about it, but the man that I have now is a man, not a boy trying to be one."
"Miroku's a lawyer Ayame, and just because he has a sense of humor doesn't mean that he's any less of a man than whoever it is you're with now." Sango bit back the anger that was building in her chest. She never remembered her friend being so cruel.
"You have a sweet spot for Miroku, Sango?" Ayame's sculpted brows arched as her hand caught the kicking of her child.
"No, I'm just saying that you really shouldn't strip him of his manhood by saying that. He bought you everything you have, everything you could have ever wanted. Hell, Ayame, he paid for your schooling that you do nothing with." The woman was livid. Ayame was so ungrateful for what she had been given.
Sango would have killed for someone to have cared enough to do that for her. She would have used every bit of her lessons for the better good of others and her life. She'd had to pay for all of her schooling, work two jobs to be where she was at now.
How dare she assume that the hand she was dealt was so hard to overcome. There was no adversity other than selfishness for her to contend with.
"I didn't invite you to see me only to be berated for the best choice I've made in a long time. Is that the reason that you came to visit so often, too see my husband, Sango?" Ayame scowled, her voice soaked to the chord in apathy.
Sango sighed, her hand palming her face. "No, you're one of my best friend's. You know that. I don't know why you'd even think of saying some of the things that you do though. Your parents raised you better than that."
Ayame crossed her arms, heaving a hefty sigh. Her mood was already soured by the idea that she had been encroched upon. Sango was just a wolf in a hen's house.
"Well, you can take that attitude with you when you leave. I didn't expect you to be so uppitty seeing as you moved away to that crappy city." The uppity woman spat, finding it hard to control any sense of selfless demeanor.
It was all or nothing now. The tides had turned for them, obviously. This visit was going to end as soon as she could get her out the door.
"Ayame, don't you think that you're being a bit unreasonable?" Sango asked, feeling aggrivation eat at her. She hoped that Shippo was still asleep. This conversation was getting dirty, and he didn't need anything else to worry about.
There was a resounding silence that fell over them for a moment. Ayame had been a smoker and pulled out a drawer next to her. Since she had gotten pregnant she had only had them in emergency situations, as she called them.
Her eyes bore holes into the woman as she pressed one between her lips. As soon as she lit it, she saw Sango's jaw clench. Her guest moved, sliding the chair out from her quietly.
She had almost made it to the sink to deposit her cup when Ayame's words stung her like a poisoned barb.
"I'm not the one that killed their brother."
Those words slayed her. Sango sucked in a breath that could have fair near made her lungs explode. No one had ever spoken such malicious words to her. She died all over again as she felt her eyes well with tears.
Everything inside of her was quivering. If Ayame wasn't pregnant she would have pounced her like a lion, decking her in her crude mouth.
Sango tried to calm herself, wringing her hands along the backside of her neck.
"How could you even say that to me?" She said, hushed and so soft Ayame barely heard her.
"Because, you are just as bad as everyone else. No one thinks that you're a good person around here. It's amazing that you find the strength to even come see me." The red headed woman belittled her, exhaling her fumes into the air.
"He was suffering, Ayame. He had cancer and was going to die. He begged and begged and begged me to help him not suffer anymore. Do you know what kind of weight that has on me? I don't even nurse really. I just do paperwork like a dog." Sango's voice wavered, all of her conviction was washing away and leaving her with the residue of her mistakes.
"You know, maybe this wasn't a good idea. I thought that we could fix the friendship we had, but we can't. You can just leave with that kid, and hope and pray that you and his father are meant for each other." Ayame said in a haste huff. She waved her cigarette at the woman, feeling the weight of the room crash down upon her.
"Shippo has nothing to do with any of this. His father is a good man, how can you say things like that?" Sango's eyes searched hers for a moment before realizing that she had overlooked his name, as though it had been normal. She was so blinded by Miroku that it sickened her.
"It surprises me that you think I speak of people without knowing them." Ayame retorted, pushing herself to her feet. She gripped the counter, waddling slighty in her efforts to put out her cigarette.
"You know InuYasha?" Sango asked, knitting her brows together. Her heart was jostling violently as she looked towards the woman's painted face. Dread slapped her across the face again, as she wondered about his safety for the millionth time.
"He was Miroku's best friend, Sango. Do you really think that I'd have known anything about him if he wasn't leeching off of us for months." Ayame shrugged lackadaisically.
"You kicked him out on the street when he had nothing?" Sango was dumbfounded. How could anyone let someone go without shelter? Let alone being someone so close to her husband.
"Well, what was I suppose to do? He was so pitiful that there wasn't anything anyone could do. I'd assumed he was dead. Miroku's given up hope on him, too. He went down to the mura to see if anyone had seen him, and that was the last we talked about him." The woman grumbled, getting tired of her guest's presence.
"Don't you need to tell him he isn't?" Sango hoped with every fiber of her being that he still was. Closing her eyes, she swallowed the darkness until she heard Shippo's footsteps stirring. The bathroom door shut and she let out a sigh.
"What does it matter to me, honestly? I haven't spoken to Miroku in over a month. Why don't you go tell him, if you can find him, or whatever." Ayame's lips pursed, arms crossing over her spherical stomach.
"Ayame, you know where he's staying, don't even act like you don't know." The other woman bit, shaking her hands in aggitation.
"Fine." Ayame glowered, grabbing a pen and paper from a drawer. "Here, he's probably going to be really happy to see you after all this time." Her voice was like the most vile sound she'd ever heard. She'd lost everything in this city, now.
There was no attachment that she saw worth coming back for. It had enveloped her brother, her, and all of the people that she had ever known with this cynical and devastating sickness.
Each illness varying in severity until it finally took its toll.
"Thanks. I'm sorry we bothered you." Sango snapped at her as Ayame slapped the paper down on the counter.
"Oh, Sango?" Ayame stopped her as she stormed away. "Why don't you keep your nose out of other peoples business. That's what caused InuYasha all this trouble. It's for that child's best interest. Besides, you don't want to be involved with that man."
Sango looked as though she'd been shot. Ayame didn't know a damn thing about InuYasha. It didn't matter how much he was around before, and she obviously didn't know anything about her.
Hell, she was supposedly supposed to be her best friend, after all.
"Ayame, go fuck yourself." Sango seethed on her breath as she headed down the hall to gather up Shippo.
She just prayed to the gods that fate would untangle the mess that it had made within its web.
Her hand fell on the bathroom door, as her eyes lingered on the paper in her hands.
"Do you still love me, Miroku?"
AN: YES. ANGSTY ANGST AND ANGST.
Some of the ties are starting to thread together, now.
I'm fairly pleased with this chapter, no matter how angry I am at it for the difficulty.
Haha. But, as always, I hope that you enjoyed it and will continue to support this story.
Thank you for your reads and reviews!
-Jiru-