Chapter 30 : SPECIAL CHAPTER FOR THE FANS

This chapter is not cannon but because we've come so far, we thought you fans deserved it.

John Guevernont closed the door behind him, pulling off his ducky tie and unbuttoning his chalk stained shirt.

"Oh my," Edward purred with lust. "Your French Canadian chest is just making my stone loins quiver with need. And the gap in your teeth…"

John smiled a wide, gapped tooth smile. "I know, I know. It's just like in the Canterbury Tales."

"It is!" Edward swooned with delight, his toes clapping together in excitement. "This reminds me of our first meeting when we first discussed Chauser's finest work together!"

"WHAT ABOUT OUR FIRST MEETING?" Bret Michales yelled, storming in clad only in eyeliner, mandana and wig. "WAS IT NOT MAGICAL AS WELL?"

"Oh but it was!" Edward said, letting Bret into his den of men. "I gotta say…"

Bret looked at him lovingly. "Did it really turn you on?" he asked.

Edward nodded.

Before Edward could reply, Jacob bust down the door, breaking a hole in the wall for Ernie Bach Junior to appear.

"COME ON DOOOOOOOWWWWNNNN!" He sang holding his arms open wide as all the men in the room enveloped him into a thick and manly group brug. "I've got everything you're looking for, boys!" he said with a sly smile and a sudctress wink.

"That and then some!" Jacob growled, staring at Erine with the eyes of one ready to wham bam and thank you ma'am someone.

Ernie chuckled, petting each of his subservient men on the head. "Dears let us line up. You know how it is. We buy for less so we can sell for less."

"Never a truer word spoken!" Bret Michaels agreed, starting to situate himself in line formation. "And I have to say, it's turning me on!"

"D'at's such a good deed ya did for dis youngsta," Alan Shawn Fienstien said, patting Earnie Bach Junior on the back. "Yous such a good juniah scholah."

"Ain't that the truth!" said the man from the elevator. "Elvis and Good Deeds are eternal." He nodded contently to himself, nudging Edward on the arm with his elbow as Edward also nodded, chortling.

"My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun…" Alan Rickman said as he entered into the room, looking forlorn. When he faced the room of studly, nude men, he lit up like a Christmas tree being plugged in for the first time since the wires were untangled. "I grant I never saw a goddess go" he said, wiggling his eyebrows as though to imply 'oh baby!'

"He's seein' da meeeens. He's lookin' at da meeens. He's lusting over da meens… meens… meens…" R. Kelly's soulful voice sang out, accompanied by The Situation's choreographed fist pumping.

The room was filled with hot, naked, burly, oily, sweaty, pectorially enhanced, men. They came together, embracing each other like brothers who sometimes let their animalistic urges get the better of them.

"Gentlemen!" John Guevernmont said, gathering the troops. "Tonight…

WE DANCE."