***This is a short chapter, but I should have more tomorrow! Keep up the reviews, y'all are great! :) ***

Chapter 13

"Reba!" John pounded his fist hard on the table. "I've been talking to you for the last 10 minutes and you're not even paying attention! What the hell are you thinking about?" He sat across from me on his dining room table with a few empty beers in front of him. We each had a large amount of chicken on our plates, considering neither one of us had an appetite.

"I'm sorry hun, I was just thinking about things." I responded, not knowing if I should be scared or not.

"Don't apologize, Reba. I'm sick of it!" He stood, and I knew to be scared. "The past three days I've been trying to be a good guy and treat you right, and you don't even bother to acknowledge me? What has gotten into you? Huh? Is it another man?''

I stood on shaky knees. "John, no, of course not! I've just been really stressed lately, with work and the kids and-"

"Stop giving excuses!" He threw a beer bottle across the room, and all of my calmness shattered along with the glass as it made contact with the wall. He began walking around the table towards me, and I started backing up.

"John quit it!" I yelled, trying not to show my fear. I knew he was right- I hadn't been myself for the last three days. But with everything Barbara Jean had said, it was kind of hard not to. Every second since our moment together had been filled with conflicting thoughts about Brock. I knew John must have noticed the way I would zone out while we were in the middle of a conversation, but I kept telling myself I'd pull it together before he got mad. I guess I had been too late. But all I was focused on now was keeping him from getting mad enough to hurt me. "Honey, c-calm down." I walked towards him, holding out my arms and laying them on his chest when we got close enough. He stared down at me with a clinched jaw and eyes that penetrated mine. I couldn't breathe, but forced myself to keep the situation under control. "I'm sorry, okay? I'll work on it." I stood on my tip toes and kissed right under his ear. I felt him ease a little.

"Just… Get it together, okay? I don't have to deal with this shit." He pulled my arms off of him and grabbed our plates from the table. He threw them in the kitchen sink and grabbed another beer. I waited quietly, feeling like a puppy who had just been scolded, until he spoke to me again.

"Well, dinner's out of the way. Are we going upstairs now or what?" He was definitely in a bad mood, but I was just thankful he was calmer than before.

As much as I honestly didn't want to, I knew that I had to. That was the only reason I came, anyways. Well, for him it was. The only reason I came was the fear of what he'd do if I didn't. But at least this was a for-sure way to calm him down.

"Okay." I said, walking over to him. He didn't bother to bend down as I strained to reach his mouth and kiss him softly. "You ready?" I asked in my hushed southern voice. He walked right past me and upstairs. Feeling as used and dumb as I should have, I followed.

The hard thing with John is that you never know what he is feeling, or how he is going to react to something. It seems his mood is constantly changing, and it's impossible to get used to. I couldn't tell if he was mad or not as he walked upstairs, knowing I was following, without looking or speaking to me. All I could do was do my best, and hope it would work.

We walked into his room, and he sat on the edge of his bed and stared at me with that unreadable face he wears so well. I smiled a seductive smile and began walking towards him, watching his muscles relax as his eyes scanned down my body. I reached him, and then sat on top of him with my legs on either side of him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressed myself against his obvious hardness, and tried to read his face.

"You're mad at me." I said with a puppy dog face.

"Make me not mad at you." He said. He didn't touch me, but his eyes melted me.

I smiled, and then leaned forward, pressing my lips against his. He didn't kiss back until I forced my tongue between his limp lips. He sighed into our kiss and grabbed onto my hair, tugging it as our tongues wrestled. I pulled off, and started kissing down his jawline and neck. When I reached his shirt, I ripped it over his head and pushed him back onto the bed, staying in a sitting position on top of him. I ran my fingers over his hairy chest. I leaned down and started kissing his abs. Relief rushed over me when I heard a relaxed, pleased groan and felt his muscles loosen up even more. I unbuttoned his pants, and he got off the bed to take them off. Afterwards, he came back to me and pushed me on my back on the bed, yanking off my pants. He climbed on top of me, holding my thighs apart with his hands and pressing himself hard against my panties. I moaned and rolled my head back as he began thrusting for a few minutes, each time getting more forceful. He pulled me up again with one arm and used the other to take off the rest of my clothes, then laid me back down.

"Oh John…" I purred as he kissed around my neck and chest. I arched my back as he took my breast in his mouth, and wanted so much more of him. He pulled back and stood on his knees, looking down at me. He gently ran his fingers down my chest, across my breasts, and down my stomach, teasing me by rubbing circles right beneath my naval. My moans got louder and louder as he got closer. As soon as his fingers went deep between my legs, I began rocking my hips against them, moaning his name. He pounded his fingers into me hard and fast. Before I knew it, he pulled them out and replaced them with his own length. He grunted with each thrust inside of my body.

Eventually, John came. I never did, however. As great as it started out, the more and more into it we got the more and more my mind wondered away. I couldn't help but think of what Brock might possibly be doing, and just pray he wasn't drinking. The kids were with him, too. I tried to push the thoughts away as we lay there, John's back to me. I took a deep breath, knowing how wrong our whole relationship was. I had just recently begun thinking about when I decide to move on past him. I was lucky to get away last time, but would I be that lucky now?

Finally, I drifted off to find myself alone on a vast beach shore, searching for Brock. I didn't know where he was or how I knew he was there- All I knew was that I must find him. I started calling his name, feeling my voice crack as I screamed for him. The air was cold and empty, and the ground sank beneath my feet as I ran. I was alone and scared, running from something.

"Brock! Brock please come here!" I couldn't stop myself as I began crying on the beach. Suddenly, I felt a strong tug on my head. The feeling was so real and clear compared to all of the other things I was feeling, and it made everything go blurry as I focused on the pain. Soon, my vision went completely black and I heard John's voice.

"Wake up, bitch." He pulled my head off of the bed by my hair, causing me to cry out in pain.

"What- What's going on?" I stared at his fuzzy face intensely until I could make out his features.

"You're dreaming about that bastard!"

"What? Who?'' I rubbed my sore head.

"I'll be damned if you ever say his name in my bed again!'' He yelled fiercely. He brought his hand high over his shoulder, and then swung it down into my cheek, knocking me off of the bed. I lay there until the pounding in my head stopped, and then slowly started putting on my bra, panties, and shirt which were next to me. I couldn't find my pants, but I didn't care.

"I'm leaving." I said as I began walking out the door.

"Like hell you are!" He said, running after me. He came up from behind and put his forearm across my neck. I gasped as the pressure from him made it hard for me to breathe. He had never grabbed my neck outside of sex before, and I actually feared for my life.

"John-please let me go. Please." My voice was strained. He ignored me as he yanked me back to the bed, keeping his arm in place, and threw me down on it. He laid down next to me quickly before I could get up, and draped his heavy arm over me. I moaned and wiggled beneath him, but couldn't manage to get away as he laughed at me. He pulled the covers over us and pulled me close, which he had never done before. Had it not been under the circumstances, I would have probably really enjoyed it.

"Have sweet dreams about me, okay?" He whispered in my ear as he grabbed my breast. He squeezed so hard I had to hold my breath until he let go. Then, I lay there in the dark, entangled in a monster's arms. The question I had asked myself earlier had just been answered- With mine and John's relationship, there may be no turning back this time.