Sorry it has taken so long for the update. My life has been crazy lately. With the semester ending, updates should become more regular.
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Warning: This chapter contains adult themes and elements (although nothing too explicit).
Rosewood in the spring was beautiful. The snow gradually melted leaving puddles of glassy water that reflected puffy white clouds. The roses began to bloom in a riot of colors and the sun came out of hiding. It was a time for playing, when children could go and run around in their backyards. It was a time of warmth, when sweaters and jackets were peeled off and scattered until the time when they would be picked up and put back into storage until next year. For Aria, it was a time of happiness, her last stretch of childhood, the final few months of high school. For Ezra, spring was a time of decisions and choices about where he would be next spring and with whom.
Aria sat next to Ezra on the sofa in his living room, her hands stroking the nape of his neck before roaming down his back before they settled on his chest, positioned so that they could easily take off his shirt or push him away, which she would do if things became too heated. Ezra was running fingers through her hair, and he inhaled the scent of her soft skin while his tongue slid between her teeth. Aria took a moment to nibble on his earlobe before pushing him—down onto the sofa and not away like she knew she should.
She straddled him, taking off her outer shirt to reveal a white lace camisole that transparently revealed the red bra she wore underneath. He sucked his breath in sharply before letting it out in a groan. Aria sighed in pleasure, and she bent down to kiss him, his hands roughly grabbing the back of her head to pull her closer. The couple's breathing became heavier, and their panting was audible as she eased him out of his faded t-shirt, throwing it haphazardly across the room. Her fingers felt his naked chest, beginning to glisten with sweat as his hands, resting on her buttocks, pushed her harder down on him. She shivered with excitement. "More, Ezra," Aria begged into his ear.
He wanted to give in. He really did. He could feel her simultaneously tugging at his pants and pulling at her camisole. It would be so easy to just…but he shouldn't, and he knew he shouldn't. She was the one who knew when too much was going too far. But she hadn't stopped him yet. It would be so easy to just let her keep going the way she was. It was obvious she was enjoying herself. It was a Saturday afternoon. No one was looking for them. It would be a short trip to the bedroom, if they even went to the bedroom at all. It would feel so…No, he couldn't.
With great difficulty, Ezra disengaged his lips from Aria's and propped himself up on the couch. Aria gently fell to the seat by his feet, her breathing heavy and expectant, her eyes confused and disappointed. He looked around for his shirt, and bent down to pick it up before throwing it back on. Sweat clung to his upper lip.
"We didn't have to stop," said Aria suggestively. "I wasn't ready to."
"Yes, we did," sighed Ezra, his breathing becoming more regular. He sat up straighter. "We agreed not to go too far until you were out of Rosewood High."
"But it feels so good," protested Aria, "and it isn't fair to make you wait. We made that promise at New Year's. That was over two months ago." She looked up at him expectantly.
"It would hurt me more if we didn't wait," said Ezra. "In the long run it would."
"So it's back to this again," said Aria, looking for where over shirt was. She found it on the coffee table and grabbed it, straightening her posture as she put it back on.
"We will always be back to this, Aria. It always comes back to this," replied Ezra.
"But I've known you so much longer than that. You're more than just my teacher, Ezra," protested Aria, her voice becoming high-pitched and frantic. "Besides, I'm the only girl in my class who is still a virgin."
"You know why we need to wait," protested Ezra. "You agreed to wait. Besides, you're not eighteen yet, and that could cause…problems," he let out delicately.
Aria shook her hair out in a huff, combing it through with her fingers. "You know how this makes me feel," she exclaimed, her voice becoming softer.
"Oh, Aria," he pulled her closer and wrapped her in his arms. "No matter what anyone else thinks, we know the truth. Nothing is ever going to change that. Nothing."
She relaxed and snuggled closer to him, letting her head rest on his chest. "And if the world falls apart at the seams?"
"Then," he sighed, breathing in the scent of her, "we will still have each other."
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"Do you think Anne and Captain Wentworth should be together? Do you think that the fact that they come from different social backgrounds should prohibit them from being together?" Ezra's voice boomed throughout the classroom, waving a copy of Persuasion in his hands. "Austen wrote this as a commentary on society's obsession with wealth and position. What do you guys think about it?" He looked up and saw Spencer raising her hand.
"Spencer?" he prompted.
She cleared her throat. "Austen might have written the novel to comment on the gentry's obsession with wealth and status, but she makes fun of it. Anne and Wentworth are obviously perfect for each other, and Austen believes they should be together even if the characters in her novel don't."
"Which brings up the point of what happened before the events in the novel takes place. What did happen between Anne and Wentworth? Mona?" he called out expectantly.
The girl looked up from where she had been texting on her phone. "Anne and Wentworth. That's the book, right?" In a sudden flash of inspiration she pointed a perfectly manicured finger in Ezra's direction. "Didn't he propose to her or something?"
"Yes, he proposed to her," said Ezra, hiding a smile. "Does anyone know what she said?"
"Lady Russell told her not to marry him because he was poor and she is the daughter of a baronet," answered Holden from his seat in the back row.
"Good. What about now? What has changed since he proposed to her the first time?"
"He got rich killing people," called out Noel.
"He got rich in the war, and what happened to Anne?"
"She got poorer," said Hanna. She wrinkled her nose. "And old."
"She was very much less attractive than what she had been when Wentworth proposed," added Jenna. "She was a less valuable commodity on the marriage market."
"Okay. So if all that changed was wealth and social status, why would he be a good catch now? She is still the daughter of a baronet, and he is still as sailor."
The class was silent for a moment, before a voice spoke up. "Because now she realizes how much she truly loves him, and she doesn't care what her family thinks anymore." It was Aria.
"Does she?" asked Ezra. "She obviously cared enough the first time. All Lady Russell had to tell her the first time around was that it wasn't a good idea."
"But she was young, then," explained Aria. "She knows her heart better now. She's more mature."
"Why would he want her this time around? Jenna just pointed out that she's less valuable now on the marriage market."
"Because he loves her too, even if sometimes he thinks he doesn't." Aria looked at him pointedly and his breathing grew heavier, the moment seemed to stretch out for eternity. For a moment, it was just him and her.
"Which brings us back to the original question," broke in Ezra, ending the moment. "Should Anne and Wentworth be together?"
"Yes," said Emily clearly from the seat next to Aria, eying her friend. "Two people who love each other that much should be together, even if silly things like wealth and social status stand in their way."
"I—" the bell rang, cutting into Ezra's sentence. His students rapidly filed out of their seats and through the door, grabbing their things as they did so. "Don't forget to finish the book for next class," he called behind them.
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"Aria."
Aria looked up from her dinner. "Yes, Mom?"
"You've been staring out into space for five minutes. Is everything okay?" Ella looked at her daughter curiously.
"Everything's fine," answered Aria easily as she turned her attention back to her lasagna. "I was just thinking about something Spencer said today, about college."
"You did turn all those applications in the fall, didn't you?" asked Byron, taking a gulp of his water.
"Of course she did, Dad," said Mike, snickering from where he sat on the other side of his sister. "Don't you remember all that drama about getting Ezra to write her a letter of recommendation?"
"Ezra wrote you a letter of recommendation?" Byron stared at Aria, his hooded eyes gleaming with concern and accusation. "I'm not sure that was appropriate."
"Why?" called out Aria, suddenly, her voice rising. "Why was it so wrong?"
"Well," Byron squirmed in his seat slightly. "I know he's your teacher, but there are other things that should prevent from writing one in good conscious."
"I'm a good student," spouted Aria. "I'm the best writer in my class. I haven't had Mrs. Welch in class for over two years, and it would be extremely difficult for my teacher in Iceland to write me one halfway across the world." Her chin lifted in challenge.
"He is much more than your teacher," said Byron firmly. "He's been your neighbor for years, and he's practically a member of this family. Family members shouldn't write letters of recommendation."
Aria's voice, which had been steadily rising since the conversation began, suddenly dropped to an almost-whisper. "He's so much more than that." She got up and left the table, her heeled shoes loudly clicking against the hardwood of the stairs.
Silence reigned at the dinner table until Mike broke in. "Do you think she was really upset about college?"
"I think she was in her own way," responded Ella. "It means leaving everything she knows behind, and the people she loves behind, too." She gave her husband a knowing look.
Bryon sighed. "I think that Aria just needs some time alone."
Ella took a sip of her water and looked back down at her lasagna. "We both know ignoring the problem won't make it go away. She needs to be able to sprout her wings. She needs to be able to fly. Not talking about the real issues…" she looked at her husband. "Not talking about how she feels is just going to leave her grounded."
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Ezra watched the sleeping girl in his arms. Her head rested in his lap, pillowed under hands. Her ear looked up at him, and pushed her hair away so he could see it more clearly. She breathed in and out evenly.
Although the March weather was unusually warm, a fire roared in the stone fireplace, heating up the house that seemed tinged with cold lately. Ezra continued to stroke the girl's hair, and looked out the window that was covered up with curtains, obscuring his view. The girl moaned softly, and turned his attention back to her.
"Tell me," she mumbled softly. "Tell me you love me, Ezra." Aria groaned again before continuing. "I need to hear the words."
Ezra was silent for a moment as Aria stilled in his arms. "I love you, Aria. I think I always have," he finished thoughtfully.
She didn't respond, and her breathing was deep and even. He realized that she had been talking in her sleep. "Nothing else, matters," he continued, even knowing she was asleep. "I'm in love with you, and I will fight for you."
She moaned in response before uneasily flipping over in his arms, a bad dream disturbing her rest. He covered Aria up with a warm red blanket, and continued to softly stroke her hair.
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"I'm going to tell her parents," said Ezra, taking a large gulp of beer, and then looking back at Hardy, who sitting next to him at the bar.
"Tell them what? It sounds like they already suspected the one thing." Hardy glanced at his friend quizzically before taking a sip of his own drink.
"The other thing. I'm going to tell them the other thing." Ezra raised his glass again, this time downing his beer in one fell swoop before signaling the bartender for another.
"Ella Montgomery has been like a mother to me. She deserves to know."
"And Aria doesn't?" asked Hardy.
"I want to protect her from it for as long as possible."
Hardy shrugged. "Why protect her? Why not just tell her. Most girlfriends would be thrilled."
The bartender placed another beer in front of Ezra, and he took a large gulp before answering his friend. "Because it ruined my life. It hurt me in so many ways. I don't want it to hurt her or even touch her."
Hardy sighed and fingered his drink before looking at Ezra, who was well on his way to getting drunk in the over-crowded bar. "Ezra, I'm not a philosophical kind of guy, but you have touched Aria and her life. That means this other thing has touched her too, whether you like it or not."
"It's just," Ezra downed his second beer and wiped his mouth before continuing "It's just it would be easier to tell her parents than to tell her. They might be more understanding."
"And she wouldn't?"
Ezra ignored his friend and signaled the bartender for a third beer.
Hardy took a sip of his own drink before he continued his thought. "I haven't been the most supportive of you and Aria. I think it's one of the stupidest, most irresponsible things you've ever done. And I say that knowing you dated Jackie Molina. But if she is truly the person you love, and if she really does love you, then she will understand. And if she is the person you're supposed to be with, then she won't run away from it or from you." Hardy finished his beer, patted Ezra on the back, and left the bar, leaving Ezra alone with his thoughts and his demons.
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"Aria?" asked Ezra. He was sitting at the wooden desk in his study, looking from the pile of papers he was working on.
"Hmm," she responded lazily, looking down at her book. She was sitting comfortably in the leather chair Ezra kept in his office, her legs swung over one of the arms, the other arm supporting her back. He noticed she was reading The Bell by Iris Murdoch, the book he had just assigned for class.
"If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?"
Aria lowered her book and looked at him thoughtfully. "Like if I suddenly found out I was a billionaire, and could go anywhere I wanted?"
Ezra hesitated. "I mean, like if you suddenly sprouted wings and could fly somewhere, anywhere in the world, someplace you've always wanted to go."
"Well," she said slowly, "There is this painting I saw in Florence when we were in Italy. It was of a woman, a Renaissance lady, dressed in this beautiful blue gown staring out a window of this palatial mansion. The plaque in the museum said that it been in California for decades in this woman's private collection. I looked up the painting online after we got home from Europe, just because I couldn't get it out of my head, you know? The museum's website said that the painting was part of a series and that there was a companion piece. It's probably lost now, but if I could go anywhere in the world, if I could suddenly sprout wings or fly or teleport somewhere, I'd like to see that other painting. It would have been nice to know what she was looking at." Aria sighed. "I know it's not much of an answer, and it probably doesn't make sense—"
"No," cut in Ezra, "it makes perfect sense."
Aria smiled brightly at his understanding. "I love you, you know?" she said softly from across the room.
"I know," he replied, his eyes dark pools of wonder and amazement.
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"Why are you springing this on us now?" asked Byron, his tone curious but without astonishment. He shifted in his seat, the leather of his living room couch crackling.
"You are my family. Aria is my family. It's time I stopped hiding."
Ella glanced out of her living room window and to the house next door thoughtfully. "We never would have known. You could have kept quiet."
"I could have," agreed Ezra. "I could have gone on teaching at Rosewood High for thirty years without anyone knowing that I wrote a novel or about all this, but that would have felt too much like lying."
"What are you going to do about it?" asked Ella gently, patting Ezra's knee.
"I had wanted to give it all away. I talked to Isaac—my lawyer—about it, but the way everything is set up through," Ezra swallowed, "through the businesses and the real estate and the way the will was written. I can't. I'm stuck with it."
"No, sweetheart," said Ella in her most motherly-sounding voice. "About Aria. What are you going to do about it?"
"You know," said Ezra matter-of-factly.
Ella looked away and then back at him. "I know enough to suspect. I know enough to know that you have been her best friend for years."
"That's not to say we approve," said Byron honestly. "But things aren't…things aren't going to stay the way they are forever. Aria is talking about college, and I'm sure you're going to write another book."
"And June is right around the corner where the, the delicacy of our situation will be put behind us," finished Ezra somewhat harshly.
"Something like that," said Byron.
"What do you want me to do?" asked Ezra helplessly.
"Tell her what you told us, and hold off until graduation. I don't want Aria to think she finished her senior year off well because she had help. I want her to look back later and know she did it by herself."
Ezra winced at the implication. "And you?" he asked Ella.
She smiled softly. "There are worst things in the world than having Ezra Fitzgerald as my daughter's boyfriend."
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Ezra was startled when he heard his bedroom door open suddenly, the door opening with a bang against the opposite wall. It was late on a Saturday night, and Ezra had nearly fallen asleep reading Ulysses. But the sight that greeted jolted him until he was wide awake—and nervous.
Aria was wearing stilettos, heels even higher than her normally heeled shoes. She wore short shorts. Something, Ezra thought practically, was not at all warm with the storm that raged outside. She wore a black leather jacket over her shirt. Her make-up and hair were perfectly made-up and coiffed. She was breathtaking.
"I've been thinking," said Aria, walking towards him while unzipping her jacket, revealing nothing underneath but a lacy black bra. She kicked off her shoes. Ezra groaned in pleasure. "I've been thinking, that we've spent too much time thinking," she climbed onto the bed, crawling toward him on all fours, "don't you?" she leaned into him, her breath tickling his cheek.
He captured her lip in his, and pulled her closer. He wanted more of her, and he wanted more of her now. They broke apart for a minute so they could reposition themselves. "Yeah," he answered as he did so, nodding his head vigorously. He threw his book onto his coffee table as she shimmied out of her shorts, revealing panties that matched her bra, and straddled him. She pinned him against the headboard, and he let her. He was too busy feeling the bare flesh of her legs. He breasts pressed against his chest and she slid her tongue into his mouth. She tasted delicious. She ran her fingers through his hair and down across his shoulders until she grabbed his hands in hers, positioning them until they were on her breasts and buttocks.
"Please, Ezra," she begged. "I need this. Please." She kissed him again, without giving him time to respond, and suddenly she rolled over until he was on top of her, the bedding a mess of sheets and comforter. "Let's not think about it," she whispered. "Let's just do it." She tried to pull off his shirt.
"Aria, we can't," he told her, his resolve disappearing with every second that she touched him. "There are things you don't know, things you need to know before we do this."
"I know that I love you," she said, successfully pulling his shirt off. "That's all I need to know."
"Aria," he held her until she was still in his arms. They were both panting. "I need to talk to you."
"Please don't bring up what I know you're going to bring up," she whispered. "I don't want to think about that part of our lives right now."
"Aria," he struggled to find the words. "What I need to tell you. It's that, it's that my last name isn't Fitz. It's Fitzgerald."
March 14, 2012
Rosewood in the spring is beautiful. The snow gradually melts, leaving puddles of glassy water reflecting puffy white clouds. The roses begin to bloom in a riot of colors and the sun comes out of hiding. It's time for playing, when children can go and run around in their backyards. It is a time of warmth, when sweaters and jackets are peeled off and scattered until the time when they are picked up and put back into storage until next year. For me, it is a time of happiness and a time of decisions. College is coming. I applied to several schools. NYU, Columbia, UCLA, U of Penn, and Hollis of course. What does that mean for me and Ezra? What does that mean for me? What does that mean for Ezra?