Emiya Clan - Nerima 02a
Emiya Shirou, patriarch of one of the most powerful families in Shin-Tokyo, was sitting at a table across from a stern-looking man. In a situation he was finding himself in far too often recently, he struggled with how to explain the fact that one of his children had suddenly, recently become permanently attached with the other man's own child.
Fortunately, the young black-haired youth took the decision out of his hands. "Let me guess," Ranma Saotome said with a weary sigh. "Pops here got me another fiancée?" Akitsu shifted slightly at her customary position beside her husband but was otherwise silent. Koyuki sat on his opposite side, but rather than the impassive expression she usually displayed, she had a hungry expression on her face as she stared at the speaker.
Shirou simply raised an eyebrow at the boy's statement. "Another fiancée?" he repeated, his voice artificially mild.
"Oh yeah," the Ranma said, heedless of the shushing noises his father was making at him. "I've got at least half a dozen people after me, with roughly half of them directly because of Pop here. There was the arranged promise, the okonomiyaki stand, the Chinese prize food..."
Shirou's eyes snapped over to Genma Saotome, who suddenly developed an interest for a smudge on a wall to the side. Frowning, he raised his hand to stop Ranma from continuing his list.
"Although I am finding this extremely interesting," he turned a glare on the elder Saotome. "I must point out that amongst my family, there are several... customs involved which have escalated our claim."
Ranma narrowed eyes at the Emiya patriarch. "You ain't Chinese are ya?"
Shirou blinked at that. "Um, no. However I would like to ask you to confirm something." He indicated his daughter with a wave. "When you kissed my daughter-"
A large mallet, glowing brightly and promising painful vengeance slammed into the chair where Ranma had just been sitting, interrupting the conversation. The whole table turned as one towards an equally brightly glowing girl, trembling with rage as she pulled the weapon from the shattered remains of the furniture.
"Raanmaa~" growled the short-haired girl.
"It wasn't my fault, Akane!" The protest came from above and Shirou turned away from his study of the unique weapon to find his prospective son-in-law clinging to the ceiling. "She kissed me!"
The youngest Tendo, Fiancée #1, merely growled something unintelligible and cocked her arm to hurl her weapon... only to find it pressed firmly against the table by a steady arm.
Shirou met her glare with an even stare, then turned his attention back upwards. "When you kissed my daughter," he continued. "did you happen to notice anything unusual?" Ranma seemed to double-check that the tomboy had been safely contained before he noiselessly dropped back to the floor. "She... uh, started glowing?" He turned a critical eye towards Koyuki who smiled faintly at the sudden attention. "She doesn't have a curse, does she?"
"Oh, no," Shirou reassured him. "Not at all. However, if what you said is true, then according to... her people's customs, you two are now married."
"What?" More than one set of eyes suddenly turned to stare at the now blushing Emiya teen.
"You... you pervert!" Akane shrieked at Ranma. She hefted her mallet high - the same mallet Shirou suddenly realized was no longer in his grasp.
Had she somehow dematerialized it and reformed it? Golden eyes suddenly focused on her more closely as an aura visibly manifested itself around her.
Ranma leapt back to avoid her attack, landing near the wall when it abruptly exploded into splinters. A purple-haired girl dual-wielding Chinese chúi jumped through the gaping hole and took an aggressive stance.
"Airen no can marry New-Girl! Shampoo kill!"
Shirou's eye twitched.
Another girl dropped in behind the first, this one wielding what seemed to be a grossly oversized cooking utensil. "Ran-chan, ignore that hussy's claims! You've got me!"
Yet another wall across the room burst into pieces and a stocky boy staggered in, leaning on a large bamboo umbrella. "Saotome!" he growled. "You made Akane cry, prepare to die!"
One by one, the Nerima Wrecking Crew made their appearances with their usual battlecries and death threats. Shirou noted with interest that though half of the death threats were aimed at his family - Koyuki in particular - each of their attacks were aimed at the black and red blur that was now frantically dodging all over the room.
"Die Saotome!"
A puff of snow exploded into existence beside him, and he turned to see an odd assortment of blades, spears... and was that a potty-training toilet?... rebounding off the improvised barrier. One of them had just attacked his little girl...
"I'm over here, you blind quack!"
He closed his eyes and grit his teeth. "Akitsu."
The sound of crackling ice was the only indication that she had heard his command, and he opened his eyes to find almost every combatant's arms and legs frozen to the floor. One of them, a Chinese boy in flowing white robes was completely encased in ice. A series of chained weapons stretching from his sleeves along the floor suggested the reasoning for his wife's ire to that particular individual.
Ranma, left completely alone from the attack, stood in the center of the room in a low combat crouch, watching the sitting family warily. A shaky hand reached up from below the table, pulling a nervous looking Genma Saotome back into his seat.
Heads all around turned towards the Emiyas still sitting casually at their table with measuring eyes. Some looked nervous, others looked murderous.
"Who are you people?"
Shirou smiled.