+ Fallacy, a 100themes Challenge +
Sarehptar

Theme: 8, Innocence
Characters: Avis Rara, Ruwalk, Akano Chi
Pairing: None
Warnings: More innuendo than you can shake a stick at, awkward situations, obnoxious OC...
Need to Know Info: 赤の血, Akano Chi, is a Cloaks original character, one of three Dragon Fighters whose official job is "Make Avis Rara's life as chaotic as possible". He's just cheap entertainment.
Title Provider: I Like the Way (Bodyrockers)

But Most of All, Yeah, I Like the Way You Move

He shifted nervously against the table's edge, trying very hard to ignore the eyes that he felt stabbing into his back. They had been there almost ten minutes now, silently watching, ever so careful to stay hidden, even from the corners of his gaze. He could sense the spirit, knew the owner of the energy was no threat, but it still made him tremble. He was in the middle of the Dragon Castle, and every second of unwanted attention was potentially dangerous. He scribbled furiously on the report, filling it out with more enthusiasm than it ever deserved.

"AUGH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" A voice howled out his exact sentiments, and the stranger who had been spying stomped determinately into the room, closed his hands over the doctor's shoulders and shook him roughly. "WHY?!" the intruder cried, real bubbly tears pooling in his shockingly blue eyes.

"I-I'm sorry?" Kharl noticed that his voice has a nervous tic to it that sounded almost suspicious. It was because he saw the unsheathed blade hanging at the strange man's side—a Dragon Fighter, and his arms were clinging uncomfortably tightly around Kharl's neck. The red-headed boy sniffed loudly and sobbed mock heart-break into the doctor's collar. Weakly, Avis Rara reached up and patted the spy on the head, around his long scarlet ponytail.

"Why couldn't you have been a girl?!" the boy wailed in utter despair.

"W-what?!"

"Ruwalk said there would be a cute nurse! Rara-sensei is cute, and is a nurse, but… He's a guy!" The mournful look in the younger man's eyes was enough to make Kharl feel momentarily guilty, ridiculous as that thought was.

"I'm very sorry, but I'm quite—" Kharl found himself at a wall, having a Dragon Fighter crowding his tiny office and showing no signs of leaving.

"I startled you, right?" The red-head straightened suddenly, untangling himself from the unfortunate object of his broken-hearted affection, and bowed stiffly in apology. "I do that a lot! My name's Akano Chi." Kharl nodded politely, not quite sure how to react to the sudden and unwelcome introduction.

"And is there… something you need?" Kharl prayed there wasn't so that he could hurry the boy out of his office and lock the door. But, as if his words were some sort of invitation, the blue-eyed boy, Chi, smiled brightly.

"Come out of this stuffy closet Rara-sensei! You could totally use a break; you've been working all day!" Kharl didn't have the time to ask how he knew that. "Since I can't check you out, we'll go check out the maids!"

"Check? But if the any of the maids needed a check up, they would have come by already." Kharl blinked his fake blue-green eyes, unsure of why the obnoxious boy was now staring him in unbroken shock.

"No, no, no…" Chi muttered, wrapping a most unwelcome hand around Avis's shoulders, a smug boyish smirk darting over his face. "We're gonna go bird watching."

"Birds? Really?" It was actually an interesting invitation, and Kharl found himself very much wanting to say yes. He hadn't had a chance to research Dusis fauna at all, and the birds here were all exotic and foreign. With a swift glance at the report, which thanks to his prior nervousness was already finished, he decided that it couldn't hurt to leave the cramped office for a little while. The smell of the sterilizer was starting to irritate his nose...

-x-x-x-

"Oh man, check that chick out! She's so hot!" Kharl was quickly realizing that Akano-san's idea of bird watching didn't involve very many birds at all. Chick, Kharl discovered, was some sort of Dusis slang for 'young female'. It made him bristle and laugh simultaneously, but he did not tell Akano that there was a time when both he and "Lord Rath, Warrior Extraordinaire!" or whatever it was that these Dragon Fighters labeled him, could also have been called chicks. "Really hot," the red-headed man whistled appreciatively under his breath, and Kharl was struck with confusion, again.

"Akano-san, I'm a doctor, and I can tell very easily when someone has a fever. I'm certain that she's not far above the standard Dragon temperature." The red-head stared back at him, mouth agape. Kharl swore one of younger man's eyes twitched.

"No. She's hot. Fine? A babe? A goddess? Foxy?" The blond doctor felt the beginnings of a headache starting to form. This was like trying to hold a conversation in two different languages. "Come on man, you can't tell me you don't want a piece of that!" The red-head flailed like a startled parrot, as the innocent maid continued to dust the open-air corridor obliviously. "I'd eat her up!"

Kharl could not stop an estranged shiver. There was nothing in the storybooks suggesting Dragons practiced cannibalism! "Akano-san, I don't think eating others is a healthy past-time…" The Fighter had the grace to look scandalized.

"Rara-sensei, you seriously need to—"

-x-x-x-

"Ruwalk-sama, I'm very concerned about one of your Fighters, an Akano Chi." Avis Rara wandered down the recently cleaned hallways beside the Saffron Officer, whose normally happy eyes were narrowed in worry.

"You think he's sick, Rara-sensei?"

"No, not exactly…" He wondered exactly how to voice his worries without sounding overly involved. "I was simply interested in assessing his mental state. While I was with him today, he seemed… incapable of speaking coherently." Ruwalk's raised eyebrows asked for an explaination. "Well, he started off by confusing birds with women and grew increasingly less comprehensible. He seemed to be under the impression that several of the castle's maids were suffering acute fever, and that they had all been possessed by fox demons." Ruwalk stopped walking, and stared at the smaller man with unrestrained bewilderment.

"And then he was utterly perplexed when I told him a woman his own age could not be a 'babe'." A sinking feeling struck Avis, as he watched Ruwalk's mouth slid open into a stunned gape. "He even suggested that he finds females delicious to eat…" The sudden fluster in the Saffron officer's face was no more reassuring than his previous reaction.

"And then he seemed to lose all ability to use common grammar, and did not understand me at all when I corrected him. One lays down, one does not get laid."

Ruwalk, blushing an unhealthy apple shade, made a move to pat the doctor reassuringly on the shoulder, but stopped halfway through the motion.

"You know… I wouldn't worry too much. Akano-kun has always been special. Really! D-Don't let it bother you. Oh, look how late it is, I have to go…" The Dragon Officer spun on his high heel and vanished swiftly around the corner, clutching his sides and horribly red in the face.

Kharl got the distinct feeling he was being laughed at.