"I lost her"
Emily was having a day from hell. Not only did she have to deal with her own work she was given Sarah's workload as well. She also had to manage Miranda's horrifying mood swings. Her cell rang.
"Emily can you do me a favor?" The voice over the phone hopefully asked.
"Sarah, you should be here by now! Where the heck are you? Miranda is driving me crazy." Emily whispered the last sentence as she began typing away at her keyboard. "What do you want?"
"Please, can you go over my job contract and see if I die on work duty, Runway will pay for my funeral?" Sarah's tone was a little anxious.
"Are you high? Or drunk? Or both!" Emily asked, as she stopped typing.
"Emily something bad happened…IlostPatricia," Sarah took the receiver off her ear. Anticipating a yell when she finished the phrase in a rush.
Emily felt the ground open under her feet, a sudden dizzy spell encircling her. 'Is this what people feel when they are having an aneurysm?' She thought.
"You what?" Emily asked not really needing to hear the confirmation to know she was dead.
"I said I lost Patricia," Sarah repeated word for word lowering her voice at the end.
"I heard what you said the first time. I just refuse to believe it," she pressed her eyes shut, "please please tell me this is a sick joke and you are laughing right now getting into the office."
"Emily, do I sound like I'm joking?" Sarah asked as she looked around for any sign of Patricia.
"Bloody hell, you are dead, I'm dead, what happened?" Emily was pacing behind her chair.
Sarah was trying to go over the details in her mind about what happened. "I dunno, I stopped 2 minutes to buy a hot dog and dropped her leash for a second and when I looked back she was gone."
"Do you know where she went?" Emily inquired.
Sarah rolled her eyes at the dumb question "Yes Emily, she left me a portable GPS navigator with all the information on it so I can track her down."
"Oh god, what are we going to do?" Panic was evident in Emily's voice by now.
"I don't know, but I am gonna take the next plane to Iraq. I'm sure I'm safer there than here when Miranda finds out." Sarah stated as if this solution was the most obvious.
"Don't be silly Sarah, Miranda can get you there too." The simple truth was that their boss probably could.
"Oh god, I'm gonna call Andy, and beg to her to be with me when I tell Miranda. She is the only person that can shield me against her."
Emily stopped to pace, "Finally that brainless head of yours has a less then idiotic idea. Andy has many sources on streets. She can help find Patricia, I mean, after she kills you."
"Andy is my friend Emily. She will understand and help."
Emily shook her head. "Before she is your friend she is Miranda's partner, never forget that Sarah," she added as the phone started to ring, "hang on the phone is ringing."
"No, I have to call Andy, bye." Sarah ended the call not waiting for an answer.
"Miranda Priestley's office," Emily work 'I'm panicked but calm' tone was back.
"Hello dear," the familiar voice made Emily fidget. As soon as Emily heard the accent she had to ask herself why she hadn't called in sick today. The answer was simple, she couldn't be sick, ever.
Emily let out a long breath. "Hello Evelyn, how can I help you?"
"I would like to talk to my child." Evelyn demanded.
"I will see if she is available."
"Emily, make her available now…dear!" it was impressive how Evelyn could scare someone even when using the word dear.
Emily could only close her eyes and pray for the best. She walked to the door and was greeted by Miranda's back.
"Miranda, Evelyn wants to talk to you." Emily nervously said.
"Tell her I can't talk right now, I'm busy," Miranda simply demanded like getting rid of Evelyn was the easiest thing to do.
"I already said as much and as always…she doesn't care. Please don't make me deal with her." Emily was so far beyond caring that she started to beg.
Miranda turned her chair and gave Emily the most evil glare and picked up the phone. Emily mouthed something Miranda couldn't quite understand but it sounded like 'thank you God' and walked out.
"Hello Evelyn," Miranda greeted her mother.
"Hola Mimi, how are you and my girls?" Evelyn happily returned.
Miranda knew it was useless to ask but she did anyway, "Don't call me that please," she sighed in defeat, "we are all fine thanks for asking."
"Miranda, don't treat me like some kind of AA weekly meeting where people have to go, pretend to be happy and come back home to drink."
"Sorry mother, I'm dealing with something rather important right now." Miranda answered taking her glasses off.
"How are you and my lovely daughter in law?"
"We are fine, you should call her," The quickest way to get rid of her mother was to push her on someone else. Why not Andrea? She'd forgive her…"She has been longing to talk with you."
"I already called her today. We talked for almost half an hour," she said joyfully.
"Excuse me, you called Andrea first and then you called me?" Miranda was taken back.
"Well you don't even want me to call at all." She was completely right, Miranda thought, but still…she was her mother. Not Andrea's.
"Mother I would love to spend the whole day talking about the benefit of jealousy in mother-daughter relationship, but I have a lot to do."
"Do you have something to say to me? Any new?" Evelyn asked curiously.
"Nothing that I'm aware of, do you?" Miranda wondered where this was going.
"Andrea told me about the baby." Evelyn said smiling over the phone.
"What baby?" She asked worriedly.
Evelyn sighed. "The baby you are trying to have. It is wonderful news darling."
"We are only thinking about it, nothing´s for certain yet." Miranda was trying to end that conversation before it even had a chance to start. "Mother I really have to hang up now, is there anything more you want to talk about?"
"Well I wanted to apologize too, about the magazine picture." Evelyn apologizing for something she did, that was new.
"Next time." Miranda started in her usual tone, "Please be more reasonable, in your age you and your inconsequent friends should not be seen at nude beaches by any circumstances. Even if that is across the country."
"I will try to remember next time Mimi, I love you, bye-bye." She hung up before Miranda could say anything more.
Miranda lay back in her chair facing the windows once again putting her glasses on. "I must be paying for something," she muttered.
-The New York Mirror-
"I can't believe this Sarah! You can't spend 3 days without getting yourself in trouble? I'm starting to regret recommending you for the job." Andy was shaking her head, incredulous about what she was hearing.
"Andy that was not my fault! The damn dog is fast!" Sarah said trying to make amends. "And I was really hungry…"
"Oh please," Emily interrupted, "What a pile of bullocks. I knew your junk food disorder would get you in trouble someday and you drag me down hill with you. Miranda almost fired me once this month."
The three of them were in a conference call trying to find a solution.
"I already hold the record. She almost fired me 3 times this month and I'm not complaining!" Sarah snapped like this record was actually desirable.
Emily was getting irritated "Ah, thanks to you I'm half way there to my golden medal then."
"Excuse me." Andy had to intervene. "I don't want to interrupt the old married couple act/domestic dispute, but I have to find my dog and for your well being, Sarah, she better be okay. You keep searching and asking around. I'm going to call some contacts now and see what I can do, and you Emily, try to keep Miranda busy."
"Is throwing me out a window busy enough for you?" Emily asked.
Andy couldn't help but giggle. Emily was being absurd. Wasn't she?
"Andy you work in a newspaper, put an ad out on the lost and found page." Sarah interjected.
Emily was clearly rolling her eyes over the phone, "Sarah do you really think you have until tomorrow to find Patricia?" Emily froze when Miranda passed her by as she headed out of the office. She had nothing to worry about, Miranda never paid attention to what Emily was saying. She could breathe freely now that Miranda had passed.
"Of course I do, don't I?" Sarah asked with hope in her voice.
"It's a good thing you came to work in black clothes today, right choice for your funeral." Emily finished eyes following Miranda down the hall.
"Ok this conversation is useless. I'm going to hang up now, let's keep in touch, bye." Andy hung up.
"Bye," Emily and Sarah said in union.
xxxxxxx
Fifteen minutes later Sarah was walking the streets desperately trying to find any sign of Patricia. She regretted coming to work in high heels. "Damn Blahnik," she swore.
A few blocks later she stopped by a moving company truck and saw a group of young men working and decided to approach them.
"I'm sorry to interrupt but did you see a huge dog by any chance?"
"No I didn't but I can bite you if you want," some guy said lifting a box.
Sarah stared at him "I'm fillet mignon honey." His smirk fell. "Too good for your lousy taste. Asshole."
His colleagues started to make fun of him immediately.
"Oh, the doll is nervous. I can help with your search if you want angel." He continued.
"You know," Sarah paused "I think with that kind of lousy come out you must be either in a terrible marriage or just sexually frustrated." She ended showing him her middle finger not even looking back.
"2 for the lady," one of his colleagues screamed out of breath from laughing so hard.
One block later Sarah saw a guy playing a guitar with a well known dog close to him.
"Hey where did you find this dog? You stole her!" She screamed getting close to him.
"Excuse me, I didn't steal anything. He was hungry I offered food and he sat here close to me." The man replied.
"Well great, that dog is mine and I'm taking her and just so you know it's a she not a he." Sarah clarified.
"No you are not, she is ok here and she is helping me to make money, so leave us alone." The man waved his hand at her.
Patricia seemed to be in her own world, enjoying the peace of chewing something that looked like everything but a bone.
"Sir I'm begging you," Sarah decided to play nice "I need to take that dog back to her house."
"Ok then I´ll sell her to you for 200 bucks."
"You what? This isn't even your dog." Sarah put her hands on her hips.
"Sorry but I need the money for beers and hookers." He glared at her.
"Oh my god, don't you think you should at least lie and say you're hungry and cold?"
"I don't lie lady, God forbids it." The man defended his principles.
"I don't have 200 bucks on me." Sarah miserably admitted.
"Well I already made a call and this kind of pretty dog is easy to sell."
"Have you no mercy? I will die if she doesn't come back with me." She was pleading now.
"Too bad." He feigned interest and a sorrowful frown.
Sarah was nervously typing on her cell phone praying for an answer.
"Yes I found her…No Andy the situation is not ok! I need you to come with 200 bucks. I'm at 52th with Madison." Sarah gave her the coordinates.
Twenty minutes later Andy was walking down the street in a rush and as soon as she saw Patricia she sighed in relief. Patricia became excited when she spotted her and ran up to her owner.
"Down girl…" Andy happily greeted Patricia making her sit.
"Thank God you are here, this terrible man is bribing me to give her back."
"Carlos?" Andy smiled at the man. "Hi," Andy greeted him gently.
"Hi Ms. Andy, is that your dog?" He asked curiously.
"Yes, well kinda. Thank you for taking care of her. How are you doing?" Andy was patting Patricia's head.
"Do you know him? From where?" Sarah couldn't believe this.
"Yes I do, he helped me with a little problem some time ago." Andy didn't want to go into details about the night Carlos helped her after a drug dealer had held her at knifepoint when she was doing research for an article.
"I'm doing well Ms. Andy." Carlos answered nodding up at Andy, ignoring Sarah's presence.
"Why are you back on streets?" Andy asked interested, while Sarah only became angrier the more she was ignored.
"The shelter you put me in was great but I like my liberty." He explained.
"There you can have a descent bed and food." Andy explained. Sad that he had left.
"Oh no I still live there at nights I just like to spend my days doing something better than playing dominos." He smiled.
"I can see that extorting people is more interesting." Sarah muttered under her breath but loud enough for him to hear.
"I'm glad to hear you're still there." Andy was taking out the money from her pocket and handed to him, "Here's your money."
"No no please, I can't accept that. I was going to give the dog to the annoying lady anyway, I just didn't at first cuz she doesn't know how to ask nicely and by the way I can´t believe someone as nice as you Ms. Andy can have her as a friend." He glared at her.
Sarah glared back. "Not that this is any of your business but we were more than just friends once" Sarah said arrogantly.
"Shut up Sarah, thank you Carlos, and if you need anything give me a call." Andy took a look at her watch, "I have to go back to work, and you," Andy pointed to Sarah, "Do not lose her again or you will have to deal with Miranda's fantastic mood today by yourself."
"Ah oh," Carlos said in a whisper but loud enough to Sarah to notice. He was enjoying the entertainment of Andy scolding the woman.
-Miranda Priestley's office-
Sarah arrived back at the office to find Emily close to tears. She felt, somewhat sorry for the other woman.
"Do you have any idea how much my bladder is hurting?" Emily said moving from her desk and helping Sarah with her thousand bags.
"I'm sorry Em. I brought Patricia home and when I was almost here I remember that I had to pick up Miranda's change of clothes so I had to come back."
"God you are a catastrophe, I can't believe you are surviving here at all."
Sarah sighed. Emily was too wound up, too tense. "Emily, you need to get laid." A thought crossed her mind. "You know, maybe I can help you," Sarah said with a devilish smile making Emily gasp in surprise.
"I'm not that desperate!" Not yet at least. "You manage the desk, you perv, I need to pee," Emily said storming out of the office while Sarah tried not to laugh too loudly.
"Sarah?" The way Miranda called made her drop the smile, she was becoming accustomed to being called Emily already. Hearing her own name terrified her.
"Yes Miranda," Sarah answered moving into the office.
"Thank you for finally deciding to arrive at work," Miranda said in disdain crossing her arms over her chest.
"I'm sorry I had some mishap I had to deal with," Sarah tried as an excuse.
"Did you call Sandoval about the shoots next Friday?"
"Yes, Miranda."
"I will need extra clothes for my meeting later, I'll have no time to go home first."
"Joanna gave it to me and I will put it on your bathroom in a few."
"Did you get the ballet tickets?" Miranda asked almost sure she'd failed this task, those tickets had been sold out for week.
"Yes, your usually seats and I already called the twins father informing him they will be at his house Saturday morning." Sarah answered with an air of satisfaction.
"Fine. Did you confirm Andrea's doctor's appointment?"
"Yes, they had full agenda for a month but I could get an appointment this Wednesday at 3:00 pm. I already informed Roy of the address. I presume you are going with her," Sarah finished.
"Of course," Miranda and Andy were thrilled about their first appointment at the Fertility Clinic.
"And before you ask, I already rescheduled your meeting with the art department to 5:30 pm in case you can't make it back on time." Sarah completed proudly.
Miranda was trying to find some flaw with Sarah's abilities. She hadn't found one, yet. For every question she received a competent answer. Miranda reclined in her chair pursing her lips studying Sarah's satisfied face. Being a friend of her wife provided her with some useful tips.
"That's all…" Miranda's ice tone rang through the office.
"I'll be right there if you need anything" Sarah was trying to hide the smile when she turned her back to Miranda.
"In fact there is one last thing" Sarah stopped dead in her tracks.
"Don't forget to deduct two hundred dollars from your next paycheck. Mr. Carlos' compensation for the graciousness to call the number on Patricia's collar and for informing Joanna he had found her abandoned on the streets." Miranda was enjoying the view of Sarah shuddering as each word reached her ears.
Sarah felt all her blood drain from her face "Fuck. Me. Dead." She said to herself. "Yes Miranda, absolutely," she continued to walk leaving an amused Miranda with a completely fulfilled smile on her face.
Fin.