Empty Spaces Chapter 10
Set from Alex's POV in the prison.
It had been nearly a full week since Alex had seen Piper just before the christmas pageant and she was coming dangerously close to losing her shit. She'd spent days practically stalking CO Fischer around the prison, but on the rare occasion that they did manage to speak discreetly she had been less than satisfied with the meager crumbs of information that the guard had been able to let slip. She'd wanted the woman to pass a message along to Piper but she just didn't have acess to the inmate while she was still in the hospital. It was obvious that the woman felt for the inmates she kept watch over, but this was a big stink and she just couldn't afford to take too many chances. The brunette understood that on an intellectual level, after all the last thing the inmates needed was to replace Fischer with another Mendez. So she was trying as hard as she possibly could to keep it all together but it was a struggle that grew increasingly difficult with each passing minute that ticked on by.
She'd never felt this powerless in her entire life. Back when she was young and the mean girls had picked on her clothes and laughed at her, her mother had been there to teach her to stand tall and tell the world to go to hell. That ability had gotten her through so many crazy situations over the years, but she found it failing her now. A cocky attitude wasn't gonna change the fact that the love of her life had killed somebody. Alex had done a lot of shady things in her time working for the cartel. There had even been one or two incidents over the years where someone had died in the course of doing her bidding and her culpability had been somewhat questionable, but she'd never actually killed anybody, that had always been the line she hadn't dared to cross. She couldn't even begin to imagine all that this would mean for Piper. Something like this could get an inmate up to twenty years at a max facility. Alex just hoped she'd been smart enough and with it enough to ask for her lawyer. The longer she thought about it the worse it all seamed to look for Piper.
The mental and emotional side of her lover's turmoil, that she couldn't even begin to imagine. She didn't know the details but she knew that Pennsatucky was dead, most of the prison had been dumbfounded by that revelation. She'd always known that temper of hers was gonna get her in trouble someday, but even the brunette hadn't seen something like this coming. She'd been trying for days to imagine how those soft warm loving arms that used to hang about her waist with such ease, or how the tender nimble fingers that had brought her so much pleasure were even capable of snuffing out a life. No matter how hard she tried she just couldn't wrap her head around any of this, couldn't stop the guilt that was eating away at her inside. She could've stopped all of this before things had gotten out of hand if she hadn't been so petty. It had been a childish game freezing Piper out, that she just couldn't forgive herself for.
Nicky had been forced to witness this emotional roller coaster for days, she wanted to help she just didn't know how. She sat with her a lot just trying to be there for the other woman as much as she could, but she was at a loss. Alex needed information but none was forth coming from the guards, not even CO Fischer. After the announcement about Doggett they'd closed ranks refusing to give any other clues as to what had happened, or just what kind of condition the missing blonde might be in. Nicky had no allusions about the brunettes feelings for her ex, she knew that what the two had was the real deal. Had seen it every time she'd caught them gazing at each other, all those unspoken conversations. She knew that the worst of what was eating her up inside, knowing that she'd sent her love away in her time of need. Nicky couldn't fight the accompanying guilt at the role that she had played that day, the smug smirk that had graced her own lips. For now all she could do was sit down beside her friend and help to try and chase one or two of the demons away. She sat down on the brunettes bunk beside her annd put a comforting hand on her knee, hoping it would help but knowing that it wouldn't.