Chapter 39:

I let out a miniscule squeak and managed, "How about not?"

"Put the sword away, my dear. You have no need of it, as you are going to be burnt to a lovely, crispy dwarf-woman in the next few moments anyway," he informed me, and he said it so cheerfully and seductively (not like that), in Benedict's voice, that I almost did as I was told.

Then I remembered that this was not Benedict, this was a gigantic evil dragon that was flying to destroy a whole bunch of completely innocent people.

"Not today," I snarled, and drove the point of my sword down into the hole in his cluster of scales on his chest.

He laughed for a moment. "No blade can pierce me -" he began, and then he choked.

"I found your weak spot," I growled lowly.

"You -" he broke off in a scream as his body caught on fire. I joined him, feeling the flames lick around my body, sending smoke high into the hair in billowing clouds as we fell into the lake, a flaming ball of dragon and girl.

The lake rushed up to meet us, and I took a deep breath as we plunged into the water, all of Smaug's fire dissapating with a hiss. I expelled bubbles from my mouth as I screamed wordlessly, a high, thin sound as the water pressed against my ears. I wrenched Ripplescale out of the dragon's skin, then shoved off of his belly with my boots in the hopes of reaching air.

My head broke the surface of the cool, clear water, and before I noticed anything I sucked a huge breath in through my mouth. I put my face in the water again, and watched in awe as the great dead dragon sunk and settled on the bottom, still completely in sight. If the men of Laketown saw him, they would know they were delivered.

With that, I began to swim rather inelegantly, my mouth gaping like a fish as I heaved air, reaching the shore in less than ten minutes.

I wrenched myself out of the water and Ripplescale clattered against the rocks. She had a pattern on her now - a fiery one that suggested to me the idea that dragon's blood was extremely acidic.

Exhaling heavily, I dragged a shaving hand across my mouth, seeking to make sure that I would not vomit. Then I shoved the blade into its sheath and stood up, swaying as I surveyed the lake.

It was steaming. The vapor rose off of the water in thick fogs, hiding everything but the faintest shadow from me - I managed to see the outlines of some boats, perhaps going to investigate.

Then I heard something that warmed my heart: an incredibly loud shout of, "The Dragon is dead!"

Cheers arose from the whole lot of them, and I felt my emotions crumble a tiny bit as I realized the destruction I had saved them from.

"You're welcome," I whispered, but I didn't truly want to take the credit. Then the realization hit me - I had killed a dragon.

Not even Gandalf had managed that.

I let out a ridiculously loud and unladylike snort, and then another thought hit me. Kili is going to be so freaking worried.

I turned and began trudging from the edge of Long Lake, moving at a clipped pace that made my mucles burn. "Why me?" I asked the world in general. "Why me?!" I screamed, feeling a rant coming on as I stopped suddenly, turning in a slow circle in a grassy clearing, addressing the twinkling heavens. "Why didja pick me to be a rebellious Dwarf woman-human-witch, to go to some other world and become a completely different person there, to come back to save a bunch of Dwarves countless times? To go on a quest to reclaim a bloody mountain? To slay a fucking dragon?"

There was no answer.

"Typical," I grumbled, and then continued walking as if nothing had happened.

I finally breached the trees, to find myself staring at the Mountain. "Hello, beautiful," I murmured softly, then began the home-stretch. After a moment, I heard the snap of a twig, and I tensed, a cloud of blue dancing on my fingertips, ready to hurl deadly magic at any attacker stupid enough to take me on. I killed a dragon, motherfucker, I thought fiercely, prepared for anything.

I let out a miniscule squeak and managed, "How about not?"

"Put the sword away, my dear. You have no need of it, as you are going to be burnt to a lovely, crispy dwarf-woman in the next few moments anyway," he informed me, and he said it so cheerfully and seductively (not like that), in Benedict's voice, that I almost did as I was told.

Then I remembered that this was not Benedict, this was a gigantic evil dragon that was flying to destroy a whole bunch of completely innocent people.

"Not today," I snarled, and drove the point of my sword down into the hole in his cluster of scales on his chest.

He laughed for a moment. "No blade can pierce me -" he began, and then he choked.

"I found your weak spot," I growled lowly.

"You -" he broke off in a scream as his body caught on fire. I joined him, feeling the flames lick around my body, sending smoke high into the hair in billowing clouds as we fell into the lake, a flaming ball of dragon and girl.

The lake rushed up to meet us, and I took a deep breath as we plunged into the water, all of Smaug's fire dissapating with a hiss. I expelled bubbles from my mouth as I screamed wordlessly, a high, thin sound as the water pressed against my ears. I wrenched Ripplescale out of the dragon's skin, then shoved off of his belly with my boots in the hopes of reaching air.

My head broke the surface of the cool, clear water, and before I noticed anything I sucked a huge breath in through my mouth. I put my face in the water again, and watched in awe as the great dead dragon sunk and settled on the bottom, still completely in sight. If the men of Laketown saw him, they would know they were delivered.

With that, I began to swim rather inelegantly, my mouth gaping like a fish as I heaved air, reaching the shore in less than ten minutes.

I wrenched myself out of the water and Ripplescale clattered against the rocks. She had a pattern on her now - a fiery one that suggested to me the idea that dragon's blood was extremely acidic.

Exhaling heavily, I dragged a shaving hand across my mouth, seeking to make sure that I would not vomit. Then I shoved the blade into its sheath and stood up, swaying as I surveyed the lake.

It was steaming. The vapor rose off of the water in thick fogs, hiding everything but the faintest shadow from me - I managed to see the outlines of some boats, perhaps going to investigate.

Then I heard something that warmed my heart: an incredibly loud shout of, "The Dragon is dead!"

Cheers arose from the whole lot of them, and I felt my emotions crumble a tiny bit as I realized the destruction I had saved them from.

"You're welcome," I whispered, but I didn't truly want to take the credit. Then the realization hit me - I had killed a dragon.

Not even Gandalf had managed that.

I let out a ridiculously loud and unladylike snort, and then another thought hit me. Kili is going to be so freaking worried.

I turned and began trudging from the edge of Long Lake, moving at a clipped pace that made my mucles burn. "Why me?" I asked the world in general. "Why me?!" I screamed, feeling a rant coming on as I stopped suddenly, turning in a slow circle in a grassy clearing, addressing the twinkling heavens. "Why didja pick me to be a rebellious Dwarf woman-human-witch, to go to some other world and become a completely different person there, to come back to save a bunch of Dwarves countless times? To go on a quest to reclaim a bloody mountain? To slay a fucking dragon?"

There was no answer.

"Typical," I grumbled, and then continued walking as if nothing had happened.

I finally breached the trees, to find myself staring at the Mountain. "Hello, beautiful," I murmured softly, then began the home-stretch. After a moment, I heard the snap of a twig, and I tensed, a cloud of blue dancing on my fingertips, ready to hurl deadly magic at any attacker stupid enough to take me on. I killed a dragon, motherfucker, I thought fiercely, prepared for anything.

Voila. Sort of a cliffhanger, not really. On we go.