Here it is again… my next chapter. So, I really, really hope you enjoy this. Please comment, I love hearing what you all think. Thank you all to my newest fans for adding my story to their alert subscription and favouring my work! Im so amazed at the response of this so far.
Lokiworshipper13 – Hello again stranger, I really hope you are ok, and everything is well and sorted (If you want to inbox me for a chat feel free) ! Thank you again for the lovely review
Anonymous 3:30 – I laughed again… and don't worry, I am a female haha!
Marvel owns Loki and all remnants of Asgard. Leera, Loofney, Leymina, Gerathaim and Gaisha are mine
…..
"Hello my sweet boy" Loki exclaimed, rushing to his son whom sat upright on his bed, his arm in a sling and his leg out straight in a cast. Loofney's face lit up as he watched his father approach him, with one of the guards that had visited him this morning. Loki approached the top of the bed and took a seat, bringing his sons head towards him, kissing his head. Loofney snaked his free arm around Loki's neck and held his father tightly. Gerathaim watched in awe at the sudden change in demeanour in his lord; watching Loki embraces his son and shows him so much emotion. Loki kissed the side of Loofney's head once more and pulled away smiling. "You look well. How do you feel my love?"
"I feel sore..." Loofney replied, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. "Can I come back with you today?" the small child said hopefully.
"No, my child, you need to stay here. You will heal quicker" Loki replied, stroking his son's cheek. Loofney's expression turned solemn and he shuffled down the bed, lying back on the bed. Loki felt terrible as he watched his son lie down unhappily.
"Will you come and see me every day?" Loofney asked.
"Of course I will, Loofney" Loki smiled, and leant forward, placing his soft lips and his son's small forehead. Loofney smiled when his father pulled back and closed his eyes, feeling weary. Loki bid his son farewell and promised him that he would see him in the evening. Getting up and giving thanks to the elder, Loki and Gerathaim left the chambers and began to walk slowly, through the corridors, in complete silence until Gerathaim looked sideways at the prince and Loki lifted an eyebrow. "Is something wrong?"
"I have never seen that side of you, my lord" Gerathaim stated, a bit amused.
"Then feel privileged dear son of Gaisha, for not many people have" Loki chuckled in response and watched the guard crack a grin and face forward. Loki trailed his eyes over the man, over his armour. "You need not wear you armour in my service. You may wear your medals and carry your spear, but I do not require you to wear your armour. You are to be my guard, and I would have you presented as such that would not intimidate my son or daughter"
"As you wish, my prince" Gerathaim agreed and was slightly thankful as the armour he wore and the helmet upon his head proved heavy from day to day. Loki grinned and looked on ahead at the highlighted halls, glimmering in the golden morning sun. "What do you require me to do this day, my prince?"
"Ahh, well, firstly, return home and change. Then report to me with your friends during the lunchtime meal, and I will give you word then. Until such time, the morning is yours to do as you wish. Spend it with your wife" Loki replied, knowing how hard it must be for a soldier to spend time with their wives when they were working most hours of the day. Gerathaim looked like a child at Christmas and his smile stretched for miles.
"That is truly generous my lord, thank you" Gerathaim thanked, looking sideways once more to the dark haired god.
"You need not thank me. Go; enjoy your time alone with her. I shall see you during lunch" Loki spoke and dismissed the guard. Gerathaim unashamedly ran down the corridor earning a rare smile on the tricksters face. He felt good at making someone other than his wife and children, happy. Stopping still, Loki thought for a moment of what he was doing. Why was he being so nice to this guard? Why did he give him the day off? Why did he have...? Why did he FEEL a need to befriend this man? Why, why, why? Scratching his chin in confusion, Loki looked around and edged his way to the nearest window, looking out over the beautiful realm of Asgard. The emerald prince began to think deeply of things that were once dormant in his mind. Looking across to the second Bifrost of the realm, Loki remembered back to the day his brother destroyed the first one, because of him, because he tried to rip Jotunheim apart. Then his thoughts trailed along to Laufey. He had killed his own father, his own flesh and blood. What kind of a monster was he? Loki sighed and spotted Heimdall in the distance, with his magnificent sword in hand. Loki felt a churn in his stomach as he thought of falling into the abyss, the moment he woke in the presence of the Chitauri, and all the... Inhuman acts they cast upon him until Loki could cope no more and subjected him to them. That is what no one knew. Thor did not know, nor did his parents, nor Heimdall, nor Leera and nor the avengers. Loki was tortured, and made to do such soul crushing things under the ever watchful eye of the Chitauri and the horror that was Thanos. His offer to Loki was one of life and service or die with shame. Loki did not want to die, but found that his heart, for reasons unbeknown to him, did not want to hurt Odin, or Thor or another person. But, Loki had to decide. He chose life, as anyone with their life in danger, would. Loki was weak, and it was visible. Thanos had commanded what dark matter he could muster and held the god of mischief blithe binds, thrusting the power into Loki's soul, consuming his body and mind. Loki felt himself strengthening, his eyes changing and this sudden edge to kill, to obstruct and control, and it blinded him and increased his anger to utter rage. From the moment Loki stepped foot on Midgard, to the moment he was bound by a gag and chains, he was under the control of the Chitauri, and Thanos. When Loki landed back on Midgard, the control over him had somehow disappeared, but not once did Loki forget the threat that was dished to him if he should fail them. Some nights, even now, Loki would hear the sickly voice echoing in his ear drums, speaking the evil words 'you think you know pain' and 'there will be no realm, nowhere where you can hide'. Thinking on these words, the emerald prince felt a sudden terror consume him. What if, what if after all this time Loki spent joyfully with his wife and children, Thanos was devising a plan to send his Chitauri to hunt down Loki, to cast on his very being the horrors they so described. Loki clutched dearly onto the window sill and several beads of sweat trickled down his face. He had the option, once he arrived in Asgard for the first time with Leera, to inform Odin of the threat against his life. But Loki thought better of it, as if he told Odin such things, then Odin would have known that Loki was controlled, and ok knowing that, it would prove right that Loki would not have done that in his own mind and own power and would once again appear as the lesser of the brothers; the weaker of the two, even unable to prevent himself from being controlled by another powerful race.
Breathing heavily, Loki looked up to the sky and was unaware of the footsteps approaching him. Loki swallowed hard and imagined, though he knew it would do no good, all the possible tortures that he would receive if they were to find him. He experienced several forms, but gathered that what they had in mind would be far more spine crunching. Loki let out a fearful gasp as images of the Chitauri violating Leera, and ripping apart Loofney and Leymina came into mind. Knees beginning to trembled, a hand was places firmly onto the tricksters shoulder and Loki let out a strangled scream of terror, dropping to the floor in a thud. He Chitauri would have to fight against Asgard defences to breach the palace, he knew that, but for that sudden moment, Loki felt like his life was about to turn to shreds as he believed that hand belonged to one whom hunted his soul. Feeling no after math of the touch on his shoulder, Loki looked up from his position on the floor and found Thor standing over him, an extreme form of worry plastered on his face. Dropping to his knees, Thor faced Loki and placed a firm hand on one of Loki's knees.
"Brother, why do you tremble so? Did I scare you that much? Usually it takes one with grace to creep up on you, and I am not one known to be graceful, or easy to creep up on you. Surely you heard me approaching" Thor spoke, tracing his eyes over Loki's terrified expression.
"I-I, I was deep in thought, I heard you not" Loki rasped and looked quickly around the area, checking for any unwanted visitors.
"Brother, why are you so jumpy? What were you thinking about to make you such?" Thor questioned as he followed Loki's head moving around all over the place, checking every direction of the corridor.
"It's nothing..." Loki replied and scrambled to his feet, ignoring Thor's helping hand.
"You have always been pale, but by the heavens, Loki, you are as White as a sheet." Thor gasped and places a hand on Loki's arm, eyes filled with concern. "Tell me brother, what frightens you so?" Loki pulled his arm away and looked back throughout the window to the sky.
"Nothing can breach Asgard without permission to enter by the All-Father, is that correct?" Loki asked and felt Thor stand beside him, closely, both looking out at the golden realm.
"Yes, that is so. Why do you ask?" Thor raised an eyebrow and looked at his brother's side profile. Loki had matured greatly. His perfectly chiselled cheekbones and chin stood proudly on his muscular neck, his marvellous green eyes shone brighter than they had ever before, and his raven black hair, straight as always, felt lightly past his shoulders. Thor found his memories almost to be false, when looking at Loki now. This man, whom stood beside him now, a powerful god, a married man and a father, was once a great rival an enemy to Thor, destroyed half of New York through selfish ambition, killed many innocent people and attempted to take his life. Loki had changed so much in such little time, and it made Thor proud to see him so. Thor never stopped loving Loki, through the times of trial and hate, of hurt and envy. In fact, it made him love him more. And now, as they stood side by side, Thor felt a swell of joy around his heart that Loki had now decided to speak to him, without hurtful glares or snide remarks, but with genuine interest.
"Just curious, that is all" Loki whispered back, closing his eyes and dropped his head in relief. Thor frowned and clasped his hand against Loki's back, holding it there in comfort. Loki wanted to move away from the touch, but felt too filled with relief to even move slightly.
"Why do you seem down, Brother? Is it because of Loofney? Leera told us what happened during breakfast this morning. You were not there at breakfast. Is that where you were?" Thor asked and Loki shook his head.
"I was there, but my emotions are not a result of my son. Please Thor, don't press anymore on this subject" Loki said wearily and stepped away from the window sill, looking at Thor, smiling slightly.
"I know there is something wrong, but I will respect your wishes and will no longer continue this discussion. I actually came to find you. Sif, the warriors three and I are planning to go out hunting this afternoon. We were thinking, to keep your mind off of certain things, would you care to join us?" Thor asked and watched Loki grimace at the thought of his previous hunting experience.
"I think not. I thank you greatly for the offer, but I wish to stay with my wife this day" Loki replied and quickly rubbed his temples, his once pounding heart now steadying to a normal pace. Thor gave a grunt of disappointment and tapped his brothers arm, biding him a fare afternoon and that he is always there is he needed someone to talk to. Loki watched as Thor walked away, and he thought about his wife and children, about the previous images of them that had flashed across his eyes. Loki felt confused. Confused with all these emotions; the way he began to feel with his once sworn enemies, the way he began to judge people, the way that he was now. . . scared. Swallowing a lump in his throat, swallowing his pride, Loki exhaled in defeat and thought that the only way now, that he would have peace of mind that his family and his own life were safe, was to talk to the one person he wished to have no connection with. . . Odin.
…..
Rapping his fist nervously on the All-Father's chamber door, Loki lowered his head, dreading this moment where he would tell Odin everything. Loki's intelligent ears picked up movement on the other side of the door, and he braced himself. Softly opening, the doorway revealed the All-Father, dressed in his casual Asgardian garb with Frigga not far behind, sitting on a chair beside the bed. Odin's eyes widened, not expecting to see Loki at his door, and he gasped in surprise. "My son, is all well?" Odin asked, still feeling shocked at his presence.
"I wish to speak with you" Loki replied, lifting his head, staring at the wise being. Odin nodded and stepped aside, ushering his youngest son into the room. Loki walked past, feeling uneasy and trailed over to his mother's side.
"What do you wish to discuss, my son?" Odin inquired, closing his door, and walked to stand behind his wife on the chair, resting his hands on Frigga's shoulders. Loki moved and sat down on the edge of the bed in front of them. Placing his hands in his lap, Loki took a deep breath and looked to the people whom brought him up since he was a new born.
"My safety; my families' safety…" Loki replied, his eyes slightly glazing. Odin frowned at the response and was silent for a moment, trying to think of a reason for this, but he found none and replied,
"What about your safety, Loki?"
"I want to know if I, Leera and my children are safe from harm…" Loki replied.
"Why would anyone wish to harm you my sweet?" Frigga piped up, concerned at her sons questions.
"There is something I have not told you, or Thor, or my wife. I only wish it to be between us. Do not mention it to Thor or Leera. What I say does not leave this room. That is my bargain if we are to speak" Loki said firmly and watched Frigga and Odin nod together in agreement. "When I fell, when I woke to the company of the Chitauri, I was not a welcomed visitor…" Loki began and watched Odin move and take a seat next to Loki, much to his disappointment. "… I was not welcomed by them as I led you all to believe. During most of my time in their company, I was subject to a variety of, well…"Loki broke off and looked away from his parents, feeling ashamed "… I was tortured…"Loki heard Frigga gasp and felt Odin stiffen. "…for months I was given the option to submit myself to their rule or die. During that time the options rang through my mind. I wanted to die, for the pain I received… I welcomed death, but a part of me wanted to live, to see it through, and to hear their bargain. So I was weak, I gave in and chose to be subject to their rule. I was used and abused for Thanos' gain. Then, of course, I was delivered yet another ultimatum; destroy you, Midgard, anything that would be in their way, with the plus side that I would rule Midgard, or once again, face the penalty of death. I am not the monster you believe me to be…" Loki looked up and faced Odin with a glare, and Odin looked shocked as if to say 'I never thought that'. "… I told him I did not wish to kill anyone, but the idea of ruling appealed to me. But still I declined the offer, and wished for death. Thanos manipulated me. I was consumed with what dark matter he could muster, completely under his control. I was sent to Midgard under his command. I knew not what I was doing in my right mind. It may have been my body there, my awareness even, but that was not my mind. I was given a warning, within a few days of breaching Midgard, that if I were to fail Thanos, there would be no place for me to hide, to realm to find sanctuary. They would find me, and show me the real meaning of pain. The Chitauri are a race that does not go back on their word lightly. I did fail them, not only that, those friends of Thor, the Avengers, they destroyed the Chitauri's sector with the use of the human 'missile', killing all their soldiers. Not only is my name up for hunting due to my failure, but I am responsible for the deaths of half of the Chitauri army. It is only a matter of time before they do find me, and not only that, when they learn of my wife and children, I- I don't… I don't know what I am going to do…" Loki finished speaking and looked at his hands.
"Six years Loki, six since you returned to us, why, only now are you telling us this? Loki, you have been hurt all this time, living in fear and you have kept it to yourself" Frigga said upset, leaning forward, placing her hands over Loki's.
"I was already the second son, not just in age but in act. To tell you that I did all that, not by my own strength, but under the mind consuming power of another, would once again place me as the weaker one, the runt of the litter. How weak would I have appeared to you, to the people of Asgard, to Thor and his friends if I had said there and then, that I only did it in fear of my life, because I was tortured to the point of near death?" Loki said coldly stiffening his back when he felt a strong hand rest warmly against it.
"Is it not a good thing to know that it was not you whom did all that; you were not in your right mind?" Frigga whispered comfortingly. Loki shook his head and let it drop. Ignoring her question, Loki whispered
"Are we safe? Are my wife and children safe? Am… am I safe?"
"As long as you reside in this realm, Loki, none shall touch you. You are safe here, under my guard. I will let no one lay a finger on you, do you understand. This realm is protected. Never in all my years has anyone breached this realm…" Odin replied and Loki looked to him
"The frost giants entered this realm…"
"Exactly Loki, they entered it, because you let them in willingly. If you had not have done so, they would never had been able to. Unless you lead them in, which obviously you will not, the Chitauri will never enter this realm. No race can enter this realm without authorization from myself, unless it be you or your brother returning from Midgard. Also, we have the advantage of Heimdall. If he were to see such an impending attempt to breach such a powerful realm as this, we would have been notified." Odin said and watched Loki nod in agreement. Odin smiled at the communication between him and his son; it had been such a long time and Odin had sorely missed it. Frigga rubbed Loki's hands gently and spoke
"It hurts me my son, to hear of the pains you suffered beyond falling into the abyss. To know now what you did, why you did it-"
"You think me to be a monster?" Loki said again, interrupting his mother.
"No, I think you to be brave. Anyone with a right mind, in that position, would have done the same as you. You said that for months you chose torture and death over submission. Not many people would even last that long. You truly proved yourself brave and a true son of Odin, Loki. I am proud of you, I am proud that even in your time of pain, you thought of the people you loved, not wanting to hurt us, but rather, take the hurt upon yourself. That Loki, is something to be proud of" Frigga finished, a tear trickling down her cheek. "I wish… I want you Loki to stop calling yourself a monster, for you are not one in my eyes, your father's eyes, nor anyone else's eyes. You are no monster. You are my son" Loki closed his eyes, sighing and took a deep breath.
"Thank you Loki, for sharing that with us…" Odin spoke quietly and moved his hand up to Loki's neck, squeezing it affectionately.
"I am glad, relieved even, to hear that we are safe" Loki replied, opening his eyes. Composing himself, returning his hardened shield from emotions, Loki stiffened his back and slid from his parents comforting touches, now standing up, facing them. "Thank you for listening, and for your reassurance and support" Odin stood with his wife by his side.
"You are leaving so soon? Come, stay with us longer, let us talk more my son, knowing this information has changed so much" Frigga replied, hopeful, and Odin smiled in agreement.
"Yes… I must… I have some things to do. I shall see you at lunch." Loki stated and bowed lightly to the Queen and All-Father, feeling unsure of himself, not trusting himself in the loving embraces of his parents, fearing that if he stayed, he would succumb to a whimpering mess and would lose all self-control. Walking to the door and placing his hand on the door handle, Loki looked back "I hope you will respect my request and keep what has been discussed between ourselves and what had been said within these four walls will stay within these four walls?"
"Of course, my son" Odin replied, bowing his head slightly to Loki, and it made the emerald prince feel quite unnerved. Loki looked back to the door and turned the handle, pulling it open. Then with one last deep breath, Loki left the chamber without looking back and closed the door behind himself. Thinking for a moment, Loki looked around, then decided to find his wife and daughter, walking off into the distance. Meanwhile, Frigga looked up, teary eye at her husband. Odin held a smile upon his face and he embraced his wife tightly. "I have missed that… talking with my son…" Odin whispered against Frigga's head and sighed with joyfulness.