Thank you again for the reviews – it really helps to know what people think :) I have been playing around with a couple of ideas for where to take this story, and it's basically come down to a kind of thriller/romantic cross over. Hope you enjoy!
As Jess stepped through the glowing, shimmering haze, she was surprised to find herself still in the ARC. It was different, she could see the little changes which occur over time, but it was still relatively the same.
She turned, expecting Becker to have his explanation ready, was instead met with a pair of astonished, hazel eyes. It seemed he was just as shocked at his behaviour as she was – after all, Becker made it a rule never to go through anomalies, and she was sure this was doubly appropriate under the current circumstances. Wasn't there some law about not going back on your own time line? Or was that just in Back to the Future?
'I can't believe it's you,' she said breathlessly, unable to stop herself staring blatantly at him. He hadn't changed – his hair was slightly shorter, and there was perhaps one or two wrinkles that his younger, flawless skin hadn't possessed, but other than that...
He looked up at her, his eyes glinting with tears, and grabbed her arm once more to pull her into a loving embrace. Jess leant her cheek against his warm, solid chest, unsure whether this counted as hugging another man, but decided the younger Becker didn't need to find out... well, not just yet at least!
'I tried, Jess- I really tried,' he whispered into her hair, his voice breaking as he sobbed uncontrollably. Jess could hardly breathe she was so in turmoil. She had never seen her dark, brooding soldier so hurt before – even when he had been shot by Ethan he didn't show the pain on his face. This was too much for her to bare.
'Becker, please, tell me what's wrong!' she begged, looking up into his dark eyes for some kind of answer. His lips quivered, and he gently kissed her forehead as his breath hiccuped. All Jess wanted to do was make things better, but she hadn't been with Becker all that long, and who knew if they were still together in the future!
Eventually, though, Becker released his hold on her, and stepped back to allow them both some space. He furiously wiped away the tears trickling down his cheeks, looking unnecessarily ashamed at his actions, and turned away from her pleading gaze.
'God, I promised I wouldn't do this,' he murmured, more to himself than anyone else. Jess' mind flew over the possibilities as to why he was so desperate to see her, and suddenly halted at the prospect that perhaps she was no longer here... in the future...
'Am I dead?' she blurted out suddenly, so terrified was she at the idea.
He turned slowly, his expression grim, and her heart flipped and jolted as she read the answer in his eyes.
'No...'
'I don't know, Jess. That's the honest answer. I really don't know.'
xxx
Jess sat on the sofa in a house she had never seen before – Becker's house. Everything seemed very neat, very organised, and very Becker.
'You have a lovely home,' she said politely as he sorted the slightly askew magazines sitting on the coffee table – mainly military magazines and one about guns. She smiled.
'Jess, stop it.'
She looked away, knowing exactly what he meant. She didn't want to know what happened in her future, especially if she was going to be told she didn't have one. She would prefer to make small talk, even if it was excruciatingly awkward.
He crouched down in front of her, grasping her hands in his, and kissed each finger delicately. It was the most loving he had ever been, and she could hardly believe this was still the same gun-happy captain she had fallen head-over-heels for.
'Why am I here, Becker?' she asked, not sure if she wanted to know the answer. By the look on his face, he evidently didn't want to say either.
He sighed heavily, exhausted from worry and fear. 'You've left me, Jess.'
She almost laughed. Of all the things he could have said, this was the most impossible to believe. She knew she would never leave him, not matter what!
Jess shook her head, and he placed a soft, cool hand on her cheek to stop her. 'You left me a note three months ago saying that you were sorry, and that I needed to look after Bella.'
Jess was about to argue with him, saying this couldn't be true, when her mind suddenly focused in on the last thing he had said.
'Who's Bella?'
His head shot up, immediately realising his costly mistake.
'Jess- I wasn't supposed to tell you. It could ruin everything...'
'Who's Bella?' she repeated, her tone having grown more urgent and serious.
He squeezed her knee, supportively, and then braced himself. 'She's our daughter.'
xxx
Jess stared at him, suddenly seeing him in a completely new light. He was a father. The father of her child. She had a child!
'I don't believe this,' she said quietly, feeling dizzy and overjoyed in equal measure. She was a mother, and goodness' knows when that was actually going to happen to her present self!
Becker smiled sadly at her. 'That's the exact same look you had when you first found out. You screamed inside the bathroom, came rushing out looking like you were going to faint, and then told me I was going to be a dad,' he said. 'I've never been happier.'
At this, Jess could only laugh. Of all the happiest moments in his life, strangely she assumed his best memory would have something to do with the military. It was a wonderful surprise that it was actually something to do with her... and Bella.
She breathed out deeply, trying to comprehend the idea of a baby, their baby. Her mouth and his dark hair, his determination with her quirkiness. The perfect child.
'Bella Becker.' She laughed again, already knowing it would have been her who came up with the name.
'Actually, she's Bella Elizabeth Becker. After your mum.'
Jess felt like crying, but managed to refrain. So much had happened in such a short space of time, and although she felt completely over-whelmed, so far, this had been the happiest day of her life.
'Where is she now? Can I see her?'
Becker shook his head, having anticipated the question and knowing it would be the catastrophic idea. 'You know you can't. And anyway, she's with my parents right now.'
'But I told you to look after her. Isn't that what you said? In the note?' Jess found herself growing increasingly worried as she imagined her sweet, beautiful baby with people she had never met before. She should be with her father, with her...
'Jess, I've been going insane without you here. I needed some time, and I could hardly go through an anomaly and leave Bella here on her own. Plus, I couldn't have you seeing her, not before you were meant to.'
She put her head in her hands, desperate to see the daughter she didn't even know she had. She almost wondered whether she was going mad!
'I'm sorry. I shouldn't have sprung all this on you. It's just... I can tell you anything, and I thought you could tell me anything, too. But you left, without a goodbye or a proper explanation. I woke up to check on Bella, and beside the cot was this scribbled note. It's just... It's not like you.'
Jess looked up, suddenly understanding everything. 'Is that why you brought me here? So I could explain why I went?' she asked, livid that Becker would risk her own future to explain something she couldn't possibly know!
'I didn't know what else to do!' he shouted, exasperated that she couldn't see what he was going through. She had disappeared from his life, perhaps forever, and all he wanted was to see her again, even if he had to return to the past to do so. He would anything for her...
'Becker, I don't know. I don't understand how I could ever leave you, and I certainly don't understand how I could possibly have left our daughter! I don't see what you expect me to do considering it hasn't happened to me yet!'
Jess stood up, knowing she couldn't stay here any longer. She needed some air, and she needed to be alone.
'Don't leave me, Jess. I'm begging you, don't leave me again,' he whispered, his eyes expressing the sheer desperation in his heart.
She moved forwards automatically, placing her hands on either side of his face, and kissed him sweetly. Their lips brushed against one another before pressing gently together as he pulled her closer. Through her mind, Jess knew there was something wrong with what she was doing, but suddenly nothing mattered except making Becker happy. She could see how wounded he was, and knowing it was because of something she had done made her all the more determined to heal him. She loved him, and she was desperate to show him that.
xxx
When Jess woke, the first thing she felt was a strong arm wrapped tightly around her waist. She heard Becker's deep, rhythmic breath as it caressed the back of her neck, and then suddenly it all came flooding back. The passion in each kiss, her hands grappling with his shirt, and his fingertips burning against her bare skin.
'Oh my God,' Jess whispered quietly, feeling almost as though she had cheated on Becker. It was the most confusing, nerve-wracking, exhilarating feeling, and she was both shocked and appalled to realise she didn't regret a single second!
'Good morning,' a half-asleep Becker said, groaning as he stretched under the covers. She rolled over, stunned as she saw his half-naked body above the duvet. She gulped loudly.
'Anyone would think you hadn't seen me naked before!' he joked, and then saw the look on her face and realised instantly what they had just done.
'Oh hell.' Though he sounded worried, a smile crept up on him, tugging at the corners of his mouth.
'This isn't funny, Hilary,' she said, smiling herself now.
The both giggled as they hugged, and she gasped as he trailed butterfly kisses down her neck. It had been the most perfect night, and the most perfect morning, that she could remember, and she was so glad she had spent it with him.
OK, so I said all would be explained, and I know that isn't exactly true, because I'm sure there are still MANY unanswered questions! Don't worry, everything will eventually reveal itself in time :) Please let me know what you think – I love waking up to the ping of an e-mail announcing someone has read my work!