Buffy picked up on the second ring, surprised that anyone would be calling this early in the morning. The only reason she was up was that Connor was a morning person. The rest of the house would be up soon enough, and then the preparations would start. It was T-minus zero hour – wedding day.
"Hello?" she said.
"Buffy!"
"Wes!" Buffy smiled shifting the phone to a more comfortable position against her shoulder. "You're early this week," she joked. For the last six weeks, Wesley had been calling every week to check on Connor and make sure everything was alright with the Sunnydale crew.
"Yes, sorry about that," Wesley apologized. "We're going on a bit of a mission later on, and I'll be gone the whole week. How is everything?"
"Everything's good," Buffy said. "But crazy. You called at the right time. It's Xander and Anya's wedding day today."
"Oh yes," said Wesley. "Please convey my congratulations to them."
"I will."
"How is Connor?" Wesley asked.
Buffy smiled, getting up from the edge of her bed and glancing over at the crib where Connor lay, happily occupied by his own toes.
"He's good," she said. "Still teething. But it's getting better. He's got lotsa tiny white teeth now. And he's been biting everything in sight! Willow says he'll start chewing the furniture if we don't get him a new teething ring soon."
Wesley laughed.
"Oh dear."
"Yeah, he's a menace," said Buffy, leaning on the railing of the crib and grinning down at the boy. "Aren't you, kiddo? But Wes, I've been thinking, Connor doesn't have a birth certificate, does he?"
"I don't think they issue those for vampires," Wesley responded.
"Hmm," said Buffy. "Thought not. He was kinda born on the DL, wasn't he? But what if those pesky social services people come by? They're going to want to know where Connor came from, and where his papers are and boring stuff like that. Do you know somebody that can forge that kind of thing?"
Wesley was silent for a long time.
"Yes," he said finally, gruffly. "I think I know someone. What would you like them to say?"
"Well," said Buffy, twisting a strand of her hair around her finger. "About that…"
Buffy tried to shush Connor, but the baby would not be shushed. His cries would fade to a whimper, and then would break out into full blown crying again. He had been fed, changed, rocked, everything, and yet he would not stop.
Well, reflected Buffy as she swayed around the dining room in an attempt to sooth his wails, he picked the right night to keep everyone awake. Nobody was sleeping tonight.
Sitting at the dining room table, her laptop in front of her and her head in her hands, was Willow.
"It's been three days, Buffy," she said wearily. "Where could he be?"
"He ran out on his wedding, Wil," Buffy said. "Give him a little space."
"I know," said Willow wearily. "I'm just worried."
"Me too," said Buffy. She shifted Connor's weight on her shoulder, rubbing his small back with her free hand. "Even Connor knows there's something wrong. He misses his Uncle Xander."
Willow smiled a little at this.
"He hates Xander, remember?"
"That's only revenge for Xander hating his daddy," Buffy reasoned. She dropped a kiss on Connor's head, as her back rubbing began to quiet him. At the thought of Angel, her heart constricted. Having Angel's son in her arms kept him constantly in her mind. Her poor heart felt like it had bruises.
"Where is he?" Willow groaned, breaking Buffy out of her painful spiral of introspection. "What if he's stuck in a ditch somewhere? What if he can't find his way home, what if…"
Buffy interrupted Willow's rant.
"Stop with the black hole of worry, Wil," she reminded her friend. "He has to figure a lot of stuff out before he can come home."
Willow nodded absently.
"At least Dawn's gone to her friend's house for the night. She might be able to get some sleep, finally. Unlike the rest of us," she said, tapping on the keys of her laptop.
"Hmm," Buffy hummed.
Connor looked like he might be dropping off to sleep. Buffy sighed in relief.
"Thank goodness," she breathed. "I thought he was going to cry all night."
"Like he did last night," said Willow. "And the night before. And the night before. Poor little guy," she abandoned her laptop to cuddle Connor. "Teething is pretty uncomfortable. So I hear. I'd cry too if I had teeth erupting from my mouth."
Connor's eyes were drooping, his small mouth opening in a wide yawn.
"I know, baby," Buffy said. "Mommy and Auntie Willow are tired too."
Connor was now fully asleep, and Buffy felt exhaustion pulling at her as well. She slept when Connor slept, and she'd take whatever she could get. Carefully, she laid Connor down in his bassinette in the living room, and crashed on the couch.
"You should try and get some sleep, Wil," she called into the dining room.
"Still too wired," Willow answered back. "You sleep, though."
The sound of the door opening jerked Buffy out of her doze. She opened her eyes in time to see Willow rush to the door, and Xander to come stumbling through it.
"Xander!" said Willow. She had forgotten to keep her voice down. Her loud exclamation woke Connor up, and he was upset.
He screamed his protest for the world to hear.
"Oops," winced Willow.
Immediately, Buffy was awake. She wearily picked the baby up, rocking him against her shoulder.
"Hi Xander," she said, giving him a small smile.
"I see my presence has not gone unnoticed," Xander said.
Willow threw her arms around her best friend and hugged him tightly.
"We were so worried about you!" she said.
"Sorry," Xander replied. "I'm sorry. About everything."
Buffy came forward, and Xander put his arms around both her and Willow, in a three-way hug.
"I even missed the screaming wonder," Xander said, regarding Connor with affectionate dislike.
"You missed lots of screaming," Buffy assured him
Xander made a face.
"Oh joy."
"Hey Xand, I've been thinking," Buffy said, trailing into the living room, where Xander was moping on the couch. He'd been there for the past week, ever since coming back from his abortive wedding attempt.
Xander looked up.
"Uh oh," he joked lamely. "The Buffster's been thinking."
Buffy shifted Connor on her shoulder, and made a face at him.
"You're not going to go back to your apartment, right?"
"No," said Xander, shuddering lightly. "It's too full of… her."
Buffy nodded, understanding.
"Well I was thinking, you can't sleep on the couch forever. Eventually we're going to need our living room back."
"Oh. Right. Sorry about that," Xander said, getting up and picking up a discarded shirt. "I'll get out of your way, then."
With her free hand, Buffy reached out and smacked Xander's shoulder.
"That's not what I meant, you dummy. Just listen. I'm wondering if you want to stay here. I only have the basement to offer, and it's not exactly the Ritz, but we could fix it up a bit, put a bed down there, put up some nice curtains, you know."
Xander was looking at her, but not saying a thing. It was making Buffy nervous. She began to babble.
"I mean, I know you're sick of basements, but at least it wouldn't be your parents', and…"
She was cut off by Xander, who in one swift move enveloped both her and Connor in a hug.
"I love you, you know that don't you Buff? You're the best friend a guy could ask for. Besides Willow."
Buffy grinned.
"Anything to get you off my sofa," she teased. She sat down beside him on said sofa, and he draped his arm easily over her shoulder. "How're you holding up?" she asked softly.
Xander shrugged.
"Not so good on the Xander-scale, I have to say," he replied. "I screwed up big time, didn't I, Buff?"
Buffy didn't say anything, just settled Connor more comfortably on her shoulder.
Xander sighed.
"It was just terrifying. Suddenly Anya was talking about mortgages and kids and I wasn't ready for that. I guess you think I'm stupid for asking her to marry me in the first place."
"I don't think you're stupid," Buffy assured him.
"I thought I could do it, honestly I did," Xander said, without looking at her. "Right up until the moment I was standing in the church, I thought I could do it."
"And then?" Buffy prompted.
"And then I realized what a big faker I was. I'm only pretending to be grown up, Buff, you know that. Really, I'm just as much the goofy teenager as I ever was."
"I guess life has a way of springing stuff on us," Buffy said, her eyes travelling down to Connor, who was dozing lightly against her shoulder. "One minute you're a regular kid doing regular stupid kid things, and the next wham! Someone hands you a baby. You don't get an instruction book or anything that says 'congrats, you're grown up now! Here's everything you need to be responsible and mature.' You just need to figure it out as you go."
Xander smiled lightly.
"Not all of us have a kid to put that all in perspective," he squinted at Connor. "You know, he's kinda cute when he's like this." Tentatively, Xander reached out and laid a hand on Connor's head, stroking his downy baby hair.
Connor was instantly awake, his eyes screwed against a wail.
Xander snatched his hand away.
"I take it back!"
Life, Dawn decided, sucked. Everything about it just sucked giant purple popsicles. And everyone knew that the purple popsicles were the worst ones, the ones nobody wanted that got left in the freezer for months, and melted slightly into a purple gooey mess at the back of the icebox.
Yup, right now, life was a purple gooey mess. She had homework stacked up to the rafters, her old friends didn't talk to her any more, and to top it all off, she had babysitting duty tonight while Buffy worked and Willow went to class. Xander was staying in the basement now, but there was no way they were letting him near the baby. Those two hated each other.
Come to think of it, Dawn wasn't very fond of the baby either. He was noisy and demanding, and diapers were gross. He couldn't be let out of sight for even five minutes or Buffy would freak, and he was in the way all the time. Why did Buffy have to take care of him anyways? He wasn't her kid, he was Angel's.
But then, Dawn thought sourly, Buffy would do anything for Angel. No matter what the older girl said, she was still head over tail in love with Angel. That's what this was really about. Buffy had this sick fantasy that she and Angel had a baby together, and that if she took care of Connor, Angel would come back to her. It was way twisted.
Dawn rounded her street, and trudged down it, feeling very low. Before, if she came home like this, Mom would make her a cup of hot chocolate, and they would talk about it over dinner. Now, she was lucky if she saw any of the people living in her house, besides Connor, who didn't count anyways. There was nobody to take care of her; she had to take care of others.
Out of habit, Dawn checked the mailbox before unlocking the door. She was surprised to find a large brown envelope sticking out of it. Willow usually took the mail in before she went to class. Dawn turned it over. It was addressed, in elegantly tidy writing, to Buffy.
"Buffy?" Dawn called out, pushing the door open.
"We're in here, Dawnie," Willow called from the kitchen.
She slipped her shoes off, and padded down the hall to see all three resident Scoobies sitting at the breakfast bar. In the corner sat the white bassinet; as always, Connor was in sight.
"Hey Dawnster, how was school?" Xander asked.
Dawn dropped her bag on the floor and groaned.
"I hate school," she said.
Willow smiled.
"Cheer up," she said. "By next year, they'll have finished the new high school, and you can go to that, instead of them shoving you older kids in the elementary schools."
"And that's supposed to make me feel better how?" Dawn asked, sitting on a stool and leaning her head on her hand. "Thanks so much for blowing the school up, guys."
Buffy smiled.
"Anytime," she said. "One of the many services we offer here at Scooby headquarters."
Dawn rolled her eyes.
"This was in the mail for you," she said, throwing the envelope on the table. "We got anything to eat?"
"Pop tarts," Xander said, a big smile on his face.
"Oooh, goody," said Dawn, running to the cupboard and pulling the brightly coloured box out. "I thought Willow didn't believe in pop tarts?"
Willow wrinkled her nose.
"Xander shopped today."
"Ah," said Dawn. "That explains it."
Buffy, meanwhile, ripped open her envelope, and slid out the various papers from inside.
"Whatcha got there, Buff?" Willow asked, peering over her shoulder.
"It's from Wes," Buffy said, showing her friend the short letter Wesley had written. From inside the folded paper, several hundred dollar bills slipped out.
"Buffy's monthly child support," Xander joked.
Buffy made a face at him.
"Hey, at least someone cares if the little guy goes to college or not!" she said.
"Buffy there's something else," Willow said, pointing down to the envelope.
Dawn leaned over her sister's shoulder as the slayer slid the piece of paper out of the envelope.
"Birth certificate?" she asked, suddenly a lot more interested than she had been a few seconds ago.
Buffy's eyes scanned it.
"Wow, Wes, I knew you were good, but this is like, freakishly good."
"Splainy," Willow demanded, leaning across the table to look at the certificate.
Buffy slid it over so that Willow and Xander could take a better look at it.
"About a week ago I realized that Connor didn't have a birth certificate. And I didn't want those social service people trying to take him away from me. So I asked Wes if he had any connections that would get me one. I didn't expect it to be that fast."
"Uh, Buff?" Willow said, her eyes glued to the paper. "Did you see this?"
"See what?"
Willow pointed to a spot on the paper. Buffy came around the table to see it right side up, while Dawn peered over Xander's shoulder. Under the spot for "mother" it read Buffy Anne Summers.
Buffy shrugged.
"So?"
"Is that supposed to happen?" Xander asked, staring at the page in disbelief.
"You're not Connor's birth mom," Dawn reminded her, crossing her arms over her chest and scowling at her older sister. "Or did you forget not giving birth?"
"What is it supposed to say, 'Darla the Vampire'? At least I'm a real person," Buffy said. She smoothed her finger over her name on the certificate. "This way, he's legally mine, no questions asked."
"Is it legal?" Willow asked.
Buffy nodded.
"Wes says it is."
"There's just one problem, Buff," said Xander, "He's not your kid."
Dawn could almost here Buffy's defenses go up, like the clang of a drawbridge being drawn.
"Excuse me?" she said, her voice hard as iron.
"I don't care what that paper says, it's a lie," Xander said. " He's not your kid, Buffy. He's Angel's. And no matter how much you pretend, he's never going to be your kid."
Buffy's eyes were cold as she regarded her friend.
"He's my kid," she said, her words all very carefully annunciated.
"Uh, no, he's not," said Xander. His temper, already short these days, compounded with his old dislike for Angel, was boiling to the surface once again. "That paper's a lie. You're lying to people by telling them Connor's your son."
"And what am I supposed to say?" Buffy snapped. " 'This is Connor. He's my vampire ex-boyfriend's miraculously non-vampire baby that I'm looking after for a while because a bunch of demon cults want to kill him. Please don't take him away from me, Social Service lady'? If I want to keep Connor, this is what I have to do."
"And what about when Angel wants him back?" Dawn interrupted. "What're you going to do then? I know you've got some sort of twisted fantasy about you and him and Connor being a family, but that doesn't make it true."
"I thought you of all people would have understood," Buffy said, turning to her sister.
Dawn felt her blood run cold. She hated feeling like a freak, being reminded that she wasn't human.
"Me of all people?" she asked, her voice dropping dangerously low.
Buffy sighed, recognizing the tone instantly.
"That's not what I meant, Dawnie. What I mean is, you're not born of Mom and Dad either. But that doesn't make you less their daughter or less my sister. It's the same with Connor," she put her hands on both her sister's shoulders. "This seems to be the way I get family. Now, I didn't ask for Connor. But he's my son, just like you're my sister."
Dawn looked once into her older sister's face, then wrapped her arms around her.
"I love you, Buffy," she said. "I don't say that enough."
"I love you too, Dawn," she gently stroked Dawn's long hair, and for the first time in a long time, Dawn felt loved and protected like she used to. Buffy pulled away, smiling. "You and Connor, and Willow and Xander, you guys are the family I choose."
Willow joined them, with an arm over each Summers sister.
"We're a family," she agreed. "And I say, if Buffy wants to be Connor's mother for real, why not? When Angel comes back… we'll deal with that then. In the mean time, Buffy's got a point, we can't just have a baby around with no explanation."
Xander looked at the girls, then at Connor, then back to the girls.
"Fine, fine," He grumbled. He came around the other side of the island to join the hug. "Official welcome to the family, Connor Summers."
There was general hugging, then everyone broke away, resuming their places around the island. Dawn picked up her half eaten pop tart and continued munching.
Buffy went to clear some plates from the dining room, and paused in the doorway.
"And I so do not have a family fantasy about me and Angel," she said, hands on her hips.
Even Xander snorted.
"Yeah, whatever, Buff."