My 'Innocent' Life
AN: Based off an episode of Drake And Josh(A show not similar at all to this show), this story consists on what could happen if the world the characters are in had a camera? Yes, you heard right, a camera. Riveting, isn't it?
Story 3: Gone In A Flash
It was another day in the Black Order, with no mission or trouble brewing... yet.
Lavi was all alone in the building, lying on the couch and complaining about how bored he was, especially without anyone to hang out with or even bother, "Maybe I should have gone with them after all..." He sighed.
It all seemed like it was going to be another boring day at the Black Order.
Then, someone suddenly started talking through a mega speaker and made an announcement, "Attention members of The Black Order, will you please meet me in The Science Department? I have something really interesting to show you all so do hurry up. Oops, I think I messed up on my speech there... my bad, don't worry about it and just come on over to the Department!"
When the speech ended, Lavi just stared blankly at what he just heard, "Something... interesting... to show us?" Then again, it WAS something to do, and it would certainly be better than laying on the couch all day.
"Alright!" Needlessly, Lavi decides to go to the Division and see what the news is all about.
.-.-.-.
By the time he got there, Komui was already waiting for them, "Ah, I see you all made it..." He turned happily and then frowned when he saw that only Lavi had shown up. "...Lavi, where's everybody else?"
"Oh, they left somewhere, but they'll be back... eventually."
"Well, I guess we'll continue nonetheless. Anyways, I have made another invention that'll be useful for combat!" Komui announced.
"Sweet, lay it on me, Komui." Lavi responded.
"Sure thing, may I present to you..." He lifts up said thing into the air for Lavi to see, "A CAMERA!"
"It... doesn't look like a battle weapon though..." Lavi said disappointedly.
"Well, it's supposed to not look like a battle weapon, but it secretly is."
"Oh really? Well, what does it do then?"
"For starters, this device has a flasher that can blind anyone who gets into contact with it. For example..." Komui demonstrates this by pressing on the small button, making a flash, causing Lavi to cover his eyes.
"Geez Komui, was that really necessary?" He complained.
"Oh, sorry, but I wanted to prove my point here. Another thing you can do is take someone's appearance on here so you can remember what they look like. That way it'll be easy to spot some differences on certain people in case they were imposing someone or store some memories that you've spent together."
There was a silence between the two, "What? It could happen ya know. Also, if you push this button long enough, you can actually trap them inside and can use them for interrogation! Pretty neat huh?"
"Eh... I guess so? Sorry but I still don't see it like you can."
"It's alright, you'll get used to it eventually. Now one last thing I want to point out is that you can use these lens to zoom in and out on a location and spot some hidden things with this. Go on, try it out," He gave Lavi the camera to try out.
"Sweet, thanks for the cam Komui!" And just as he was about to leave...
"Oh, and don't use them for too long, ok? You're only testing them to see if they're useable."
"Sure, I got it," He said sarcastically and walked out of the department... for now.
.-.-.-.
Not long after he leave, Lavi starts to pester on about the camera.
'Hmm, now what should I do with this camera? What should I test it on? Better than that... who should I test it on?' Lavi sneers at the last thought, and decides to wait until later to use it.
.-.-.-.
Meanwhile, Allen Walker and co. climb onto a train and are on their home from what they were doing before.
"Man, that sure was a nice shopping trip, wouldn't you say boys?" Lenalee said with a smile.
"Yeah, it certainly was..." Kanda muttered while carrying all of the groceries (and Mugen) with his hands, looking like he's unable to balance himself.
"Uh, Kanda? Are you sure you don't need any help with that?" Allen asked.
"Are you kidding? And be pestered by this nuisance about being a weakling? No fucking way!"
"Aw come on Kandy, this is improving your strength," Lenalee protested, "Aren't you glad that you get to train yourself while going from place to place?"
"Not like this... And how is carrying food that we'll eventually eat considered training!? What's next, make me cook all of the food?"
"Well, now that you mention it..."
"GOD DAMN IT!"
"Ehehehe, calm down BaKanda she was just messing with you," Allen said with a smile.
"I was, right Kandy?"
"I think I like BaKanda better, to be perfectly honest..." Kanda grumbled.
.-.-.-.
Eventually the trio make it home with the food, "We're back from food stealing!"
"BaKanda meant shopping!"
"Whatever, just hurry and help with the food wherever you dweebs are."
"Show time," Someone whispered. He sneaked up and took a picture of the trio, startling them and making Kanda drop their foods in the process, "Stri-ku!"
'Should have known...' "You idiot, what did you do that for?"
"Just for giggles and laughs, and man was that hilarious! You guys should have seen the looks on our own faces!" Lavi started to burst out laughing. "Oh yeah, here's a picture to show you guys, Kanda's looked the silliest. SOME tough guy Yu are."
'I swear, you just love to spite me, don't you?'
"Your probably wondering where I found this 'camera'..."
'Not really. Why the hell's that called a camera anyway? That sounds pretty stupid if you ask me...' Kanda thought.
"Well ya see, lets just say that it's... a secret."
"For fucks sake, give me the camera!" Kanda yelled as he reached for the camera, but Lavi quickly pushes the button just in time.
"AH, SHIT MY EYES! I'VE GONE BLIND!" He screams out and walks backwards, trips on a banana, falls on the ground, fell down the stairs, and into a dumpster outside near a basement.
"Hilarity at its finest," Lavi blows his camera like a person would blow on their gun and walks off. 'Though I'm confused as to where the banana came from. Wasn't from me that's for sure...'
"Oh crap! Now what the hell did you do that for Lavi?" Lenalee snapped.
"Oh, like I said, hilarity."
"I'm going to go and see if he's alright while you go and take care of the groceries," Lenalee ordered and goes down into the basement.
Lavi comes from behind the door and takes another shot at Lenalee, who trips and falls halfway there.
"Sorry, didn't think you'd fall down."
"LAVI!" Lena and Kanda were both heard yelling.
"Lavi, stop using that camera to scare people, it's not funny," Allen scolds the red-head.
"Yeah, I guess you're right. I'll stop doing so."
"Good. Now will you please help me with the groceries?"
"Sure thing, after I go to the bathroom."
"Alright then, hurry back."
"K."
.-.-.-.
"Hmm... I think I have another idea..." While going to the bathroom, Lavi decides to pull one last camera prank on someone and runs over to find Allen's bedroom and opens the door. There, he sees the small golem named Timcampy moving around the room trying to find something to do.
"Hey, Timmy, say cheese!" He said as he pushes the button and takes a picture of him/her/it. By doing that however, had caused him to stop mid-air and fall to the ground.
"Uh... Timcampy? Are you ok?" Lavi asked as he picked him up and waggled him around for a bit, trying to get him to move. Unfortunately, he still remained motionless. 'Oh shit! What the hell just happened!? Oh man, if Allen finds out about this...'
"Hey Lavi, what are you doing in my room?" Allen asked as soon as he had entered in his own room.
"Uh... uh... nothing!" Lavi lied as he hid Tim behind his back, "I was... I just wanted to take a picture of your room, cause it looks so cool and all."
"Fucking idiot," Kanda fake-coughed at the response. He was standing outside of the room wondering what the heck is going on in there, "Is that REALLY why you're in Moyashi's room and not something else?"
Lavi pops a cross vein at the rude remark, but nevertheless goes along with his plan anyway, "Well, I'm about done with this place. I'm going to go and take some pics of the library and stuff. See ya," Lavi casually walks past them and then makes a dash for it.
"Fucking weirdo," Kanda said.
"Gee, Lavi sure likes that camera..." Said Allen, tilting his head in confusion.
"Yeah, he does..." Kanda sneered suspiciously.
.-.-.-.
"Shit shit shit, where the hell is Komui?" Lavi turns in all sorts of directions, trying his hardest to find the sister-complex and ask if there is a way to fix poor Timcampy before Allen finds out.
The puzzled Lavi stopped for a moment to think, "Hmm, now if I was in the Science Department, where would I be? I know, Komui!" Lavi makes up a solution and runs off again, only to be bumped into mid-way by Yu Kanda.
Wait, what? "Alright, what's this you aren't telling me and Moyashi?"
"Whoa, how did Yuu get here?"
"Don't call me that. Also, I teleported."
"Huh?"
"He means that he jumped off from the third floor," Lenalee walks in and answers his obscure question.
"Which he really shouldn't have done. He could have gotten hurt."
"Hey, it doesn't matter, I'm ok all right? Mainly because I'm awesome."
"Oh," Lavi bluntly said, "Stri-ku!"
"Anyways, what seems to be the problem you guys?"
"Baka Usagi's hiding something and I have a feeling it involves the Moyashi."
'Oh crap!'
"Is that true Lavi?"
"Um, well, ya see..."
"Hey, what's behind your back?"
"Uh..."
"Tell us the truth Lavi."
The red-head guy sighed and showed what was behind his back to Kanda and Lenalee.
"So you stole... Allen's golem? While he was asleep?"
"Baka, why did you take Timcampy away from Moyashi? You better explain yourself Baka Usagi!"
"He... he's not sleeping..." They gasp in response.
"That's horrible! How did this happen?" Lenalee cried.
"I... took a picture of him...and gave him a heart attack."
The two stared blankly as if they were hearing it all wrong, because he got his picture taken Timcampy killed himself?
"And you haven't told Allen about this yet?"
"Nope... not yet..."
"Man, I'd hate to see Allen's reaction to this..."
"Hey Timcampy, I brought you some... food?" Allen walks into his room and becomes horrified upon witnessing the death of Timcampy.
He drops the food and goes over to where his broken body lied. Cradling him in his arms, Allen cried over him and whispered: "Why? Why did this happen? HOW did this bloody happen?"
Depressed and angry with what had happened to his friend, he goes to see his friends and asks if there was anything that had happened to him while he was gone.
In response, they just turned their heads away without a word. This upset Allen even more. "You... you know something, don't you? Tell me who did this or what caused this, I can take it, I can hold it in, JUST TELL ME WHY HE'S LIKE THIS! PLEASE!" He falls onto his knees, covers his face with Timcampy and his hands, and starts to cry. The friends hang their heads in shame, with Lavi being the most shameful of the bunch, not wanting to break his poor heart any further.
"Yeah, me too," Lavi hung his head in sadness, not wanting to think about that any longer, "Which is why you guys gotta help me bring him back to life!" He lifted his head back up and exclaimed.
"But how the fuck do we do that?" Kanda skeptically asked.
"Well, I'm pretty sure Komui would probably know how, since he made this camera and all."
"HE made the camera? That would explain a lot."
"So let's go and find him then." Lenalee confirmed.
"Alright, but where do we start though? Cause I got nothing." Lavi asked.
"Why not just go back to The Science Department? He's usually always there when we test his inventions," Kanda bluntly replied to them.
'Oh yeah, why didn't I think of that?'
"Cause you're a baka, that's why," He and Lenelee take Timcampy out of Lavi's hands and walk off with it to find Komui.
"Hey, wait up!" Lavi yells and decides to follow them as well to where the Division is.
.-.-.-.
Nevertheless, Yuu Kanda and co. go downstairs after hearing what Lavi told about Timcampy, "Now what do you suppose Komui was referring to when he says 'Something important'?" Lenalee asked.
"Hmm, I think it's supposed to be a machine that can help us with combat." He replied.
"Bitch, please, we don't need help from machines to win battles, we need strategy, skills, and training!" Kanda interrupted while using his Mugen.
"Yuu is always Yuu, it's kind of getting old actually..."
"What did you say Usagi?"
"Guys, not while we're going to see my brother..." LenaLee tried to break the two apart... again.
"Hmph."
.-.-.-.
"Hey, Nii-san, you still here?" Lenalee says as she and the others walk inside the Division.
"Hmm? My precious Lenalee has come to visit me!? Yay, I'm so happy that you've come to see me! Oh right, the question! Uh, yes, I am. Why do you ask?"
"It's about the cameras..."
"Oh, has Lavi tested the cameras I made? How are they? They didn't blow up did they?"
"Well, he did test them, but..."
"We found out that this camera has caused Timcampy to die for some reason because of Lavi going too far with using the camera," Kanda interrupted and showed Komui the limp golem.
"Do you have any idea how to fix him?"
"Timcampy? Hmm, let me see him..." Komui looks and studies him.
'Strange, how can one possible die because of a camera flash?' He starts to poke at it for a little bit when suddenly Timcampy starts to twitch. Komui freaks out and falls back on his chair. When he gets up he sees that Timcampy is moving and floating again.
"Whoa, how'd I do that?"
The others sweat dropped when watching all this, "Um... brother...?"
"I'm ok, I'm ok. Oh and it seems that he was just temporally paralyzed by the flash of the camera, that's all. Try not to do that again, ok. Lavi?"
"Hey, there's actually one thing that I still don't get. If it was just cause he was paralyzed by the light, then how come he didn't even try to mo—"
Boom! The cameras explode in his face. "...ow."
"Hey guys, have any of you seen- Timcampy!" Allen walks in and finds Timcampy floating around his group of friends, both more than happy to see each other.
He turns to the others and finds Lavi in a bit of a... predicament? "Lavi, why are you burnt?"
"Shall we say, 'let that be a lesson to you, Baka Usagi?'"
"What... lesson?" Lavi asked.
"Never 'fuck around' using a deadly weapon of Komui's."
Everyone but Kanda laughs, and then Allen interrupts the laugher by saying: "I don't get it."
"You don't need to get it, Moyashi. Let's leave it at, he deserved it for going too far with using a 'deadly weapon.'" 'Maybe that's what Timcampy tried to do after all...'
"Oh, ok."
"Allen-kun, I'd like to say that I'm very sorry for going to far and almost killing one of your... our friends. Can you ever forgive me?"
"Uh... what are you talking about?"
"I meant that... uh... look, can you at least say that you do forgive me?"
"Um, ok Lavi. I'm always willing to forgive someone like you."
"Awww..."
"EVIL! HE'S LYING! LYING TO ALL OF YOU!" Chaoji yells at them from afar in a pissed off state as always.
"Oh, Chaoji, want to be in the picture too?" Allen asks as he holds the camera and takes a photo.
"Don't change the subject you de- AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" He screams and covers his eyes. He staggers backwards and accidently opens a door outback. Horses and carriages and crashes were heard from outside.
"Um, maybe we should go out there and help him?" Allen suggests.
AN: After that, the gang decided to take one last photo of them together and share it as a memory. They ask Cheese-Head(Chaoji) to take the picture for them, and just when it looked like there'd be a successful shot, the camera blows him up. He was sent to a mental hospital soon after...
Also, no horses, cameras, people with horse carriages, carriages, and golems were hurt in the making of this story :P