My 'Innocent' Life (Part 11)
Story #11: Pawn To Strife
AN: Now here is going to be something really really stupid. Hope you enjoy it :P
"Eureka, eureka, I have done it!" Lavi busted open the doors to the lounge while holding a small box in his hand.
Allen, Kanda, and Timcampy were all lying down on the couches. Allen was reading a book with Timcampy as the gold bunny was floating around in glee and excitement, while Kanda was cleaning his Mugen with a wipe and towel (he wanted to make sure it was extra clean, shiny, and usable for any battle that would come in between).
The three look over to see Lavi standing there proudly with his box... and then went back to their regular routine. "Hey Lavi, how ya doing?" Allen said in a monotone voice. "You know you probably shouldn't stand there like an idiot and move out of the way so others can enter the door."
"Ooh, you just got burned by Moyashi." Kanda replied.
"Eh?" Lavi looked shocked, "But that's something Yu would normally say—"
"Shut the fuck up Baka Usagi."
"No."
"Anyways, was there something you wanted?" Allen asked.
"Well, yeah." The red-head went back to his [stupid] stance from before. "You're probably wondering what I have in this here box."
"Nope, not in the slightest, now get out." Kanda replied.
"Actually I kind of want to know..." Allen said.
'God damn Moyashi why do ya gotta be so kind to everybody... even to a guy like him!?'
"Well I'm glad you asked Allen-kun!" Lavi happily replied. "At least someone gives a crap around here."
"I got nothing better to do and you wouldn't shut up so that's why I want to know so I can get back to my book." Allen sighed.
"EH? So I'm the minority!?" Lavi got blue with shock.
Kanda turned away and thought to himself: 'I hate to admit, but that was actually kind of funny. I must not let anyone else know of this or I might get bullied by Baka Usagi and Moyashi... fuck.'
Lavi got his cool back and explained to what exactly the thing is... kind of. "Well anyway, this box contains something I have made myself."
"Wait, you mean you made that? So it's sort of like some invention?" Allen questioned curiously.
"Yep, and it was all thanks to Komui and his... help I guess."
"Help, what do you mean? Why would he help you of all people?" Kanda raised an eyebrow.
"Well let me tell you a story..."
"God damn it you planned all this didn't you?"
"Shut up and let me finish... or at least continue... or at least start on it. Anyways..."
.-.-.-.
Lavi POV: Anyways I was just walking around thinking of something to do, and since Yu and Allen were not around at that time I just had to think of something else to do... no one to hang out with after showering. And that's when I suddenly saw Komui rush by with a huge box of stuff in his hands, my curiosity peaked and I just HAD to go and check it out!
And so I walked into Komui's lab and saw him drop the box and take some random crap out to... I guess he was trying to do something new or something. I walked over to peek at what he was doing and asked: "Hey there Komui, what are you doing?"
"Oh, I'm just trying to make another new awesome invention that can be used for fighting!" He replied without looking at me.
"Oh." I always wondered why and how he would do such a crazy thing, and that's what it hit me... I looked around the room and saw some shiny things on the ground and picked it up to have another glimpse at it. I said: "Hey Komui, do you think that maybe I could make something useful and interesting?"
"Huh? Oh, I don't know, maybe you could if you gave it your all... but I doubt it."
"Ah, that's pretty cool." And so I went to bring in some tape and knives to twiddle and make the box a little neater to show to Komui when I got finished, and he seemed to be impressed with what I had... or at least I think he did.
.-.-.-.
Normal POV: "...I went over to brag about this to everyone else right after that, and you guys happen to be the last one!" Lavi finished up his 'story'. By the time he had finished however, he saw that Kanda was the only one listening to the story; the other two were sleeping on the couch.
"Wow, that was kind of stupid, no offense." Kanda said in brutal honesty.
"Really, but how is it bad though?"
"Eh, it sounds more like you made that up."
"I totally didn't make it up, it's the truth, ask Ko-kun for proof!"
"Ko-kun? What kind of nickname—"
"Hey, were you listening Allen?" Lavi turned to ask Allen.
'I've been ignored again.'
The white-haired boy opened his eyes and yawned. "Yeah, I am. Sorry about that, I got really tired and barely had anytime to sleep last night..." He rubbed his eyes and blinked rapidly. "What were you talking about again?"
"I made this, at Komui's place." Lavi replied softly.
Allen looked over to see the box. "Looks like a box with tape."
"Wow, you know you did bad when not even Moyashi's impressed with it..." Kanda shrugged it off.
"Yeah, but that's just the tip of the iceberg! Check what's inside of it!" Lavi opened the box and showed Al and Yu some colorful sticks inside. "Pretty impressive, eh?"
"Um... what the hell is that?" Kanda muttered.
"They look like crayons actually..." Allen commented.
"That's because they are!"
"They look like they've already been invented though."
"So you basically cheated." Kanda came to a conclusion. "You wanted to make something but you decide to rip off someone else."
"What? No, it's just that... they stole it first." Lavi protested... or at least tried to.
"So you did cheat."
"Yes."
"Well then why the fucks are you showing us this then!?"
"I figure we might as well try something different... so I invented some paper to use for coloring!"
"Ok you should know that you did not invent the god damn paper."
"I've never tried coloring on anything before to be honest..." Allen pondered, "Maybe it will fun? What do you do exactly?"
"Fun, what's so fun about doodling all day?" Kanda retorted.
"Aw come on Yu, never know until you try. Here, I'll start things off..." Lavi said. He took the crayons out of the box and poured them onto the coffee table, also placing down some paper and a vase to make sure the paper doesn't fly off. The red-haired guy picked up a blue crayon and began to scribble up a giant circle plus a small rectangle on top of it. "Ta-da!" He exclaimed as he had finished his drawing.
"Wow that looks pretty basic." Allen looked over and commented. "Then again you drew too quickly..."
"Honestly, that looks like shit, you call that art?" Kanda added. "What the heck is that even supposed to be?"
"Why it's YU of course—"
"WHAT? I do NOT look anything like that!" Kanda shouted in anger. He turned to Allen as he covered his mouth to prevent from bursting into laughter right in front of him.
"Seemed pretty accurate to me though, I wonder what went wrong..." Lavi pretended to sound concerned. He snapped his fingers and drew angry eyes and a tongue on the face. "Ta-da! How does it look now?"
Kanda twitched an eye before taking a look at the box. "Well if you're gonna play it that way, then I guess I'll have to do something about it!" He snatched a bright red crayon took a paper to draw onto. He drew a small circle with some long triangles on its head and a bigger circle underneath it.
"Wow, that's a pretty stupid drawing, is that supposed to be me?" Lavi looked over his drawing and asked.
"Yes, that is you... as a fat dumb bunny." Pony tail man then drew a giant X on it. "And now its dead. You are now dead."
"Eh? Why are my ears so pointy?"
"Really, that's what you complain about?"
"Nothing that would surprise me anymore Yu-chan..." Lavi shrugged. "I wouldn't even be surprised if I caught you and Allen—"
"What did you say!?" Kanda got up and glared at Lavi, who glared at him back.
"I was just kidding you know."
"No you were n—"
"Hey guys, look what I did!" Allen stopped the fight and showed them his drawing: it was a small gold circle with angel wings and a long tail. "Looks like an accurate representation of Timcampy, doesn't it?"
"That was Tim? I'm joking, I'm joking it looks awesome." Lavi complemented. "Looks better than Yu's drawing that's for sure..." He turned away and coughed up that snark.
Kanda picked up his Mugen to use against Lavi when suddenly said: "Hey I have an idea, why don't we have a drawing contest? Whoever can impress the judge Allen is the winner!"
"Really, why would I want to do that?" Kanda raised an eyebrow.
"Well the winner gets the loser to do whatever they so want!"
Yu made a devious smile. "Really? I hate to admit but that's actually a pretty good idea... though there's no way you'll win against me."
"Oh I wouldn't be so sure; I'm a professional at art."
"Yeah I find that bull."
'Wow, these guys seem to be really into this.' Allen thought to himself while sweat dropping. 'I guess I've learned about new about them today.'
The two take a bunch of crayons from the box and get a totally new piece of paper to draw on and get started on their work.
Kanda draws a bunch of different sized circles across the paper and adds in a stick attached on them all while coloring in some green on top and brown on the bottom. He also adds a large circle to the side while adding some lines across it. He takes the paper quickly and shows it to Allen before Lavi could even finish. "There, I fucking did it before Baka Usagi."
"Aw no fair," The red-head complained, "at least let me finish my drawing so we could both show ours to—"
"Shut up and no."
"Wow that looks really nice Kanda." Allen said with a smile. "I like it; I think you did a great job on it."
"...Thanks." Kanda muttered.
"Yeah, a great job at rushing it." Lavi sighed sadly, "I mean seriously? All you drew for Allen-chan was a freaking plant!?"
"Hey, this isn't a plant you know!" Kanda retorted. "It's actually... moyashi."
The two stare at him with complete silence for a while. Lavi's eyes get teary-eyed as he bursts into laughter, while Allen just stands there trying to keep a straight face during it. "Oh wow, that's got to be the corniest thing I've ever heard, and it came from Yu of all people!" Lavi said still laughing out loud.
"Don't listen to him Kanda," Allen said, "I certainly liked the joke you made for—"
"That wasn't a joke, and I didn't turn you into an actual bean sprout! It was just a simple thing I wanted to do and I couldn't think of anything else, ok!?" Pony-man shot back at them both.
"Yeah, sure it was." Lavi wiped his eyes.
"Well then, let's see you do a better job then!"
"Certainly!" Lavi covered the paper with one of his hands to prevent the others from seeing it as he makes some long and quick draws with his other one.
"Will you hurry it up!?" Kanda interrupted.
"Hey, drawing art takes skill and time to do, and besides, it's only been a freaking minute!" Lavi whined.
He took a red crayon and drew over it, he then took another white crayon to draw over that, and— time passed since he first started drawing. Didn't take too long however as Kanda was sitting on the couch growing all the more impatient. While trying to find some more room for the paper, the red-haired man accidentally drew over the paper and onto the table.
"Oh I guess you don't have any more room for that." Allen looked over sadly. "So are you finished yet?"
Perplexed and shocked, this gave him an idea. "Not yet." He took a pink crayon and started drawing over it.
"Oh, I'm sorry- hey, what are you doing?"
"Why expanding of course, this takes some real talent and skill you know!"
"But won't you get in trouble with Lenalee if she finds out about this?"
"Naw, I'll clean this up after I win..."
"But isn't that cheating?"
Kanda stands up in anger. "Hey, nobody cheats while I'm around... well except for me but still!"
"Daijobu, this'll only take a second." Lavi draws all around the floor, table, and walls just to finish his 'masterpiece'.
As Allen and Kanda stand there in awe, worry, and disapproval... suddenly Lenalee knocks on the door and enters the room.
"Hey guys, what'cha do—" She greeted then paused when seeing Lavi wiggle all around the floor. "—uh, what is going on here?"
"He's being an idiot, as usual." Kanda replied.
"Oh, what else is new?"
"He's trying to make some art to impress me." Allen added.
"That doesn't look like art." The purple-haired girl turned away in disgust.
"Don't worry, he's almost done... I think."
"He is going to clean this up after this, right?"
"Hopefully."
"How?"
"Beats me."
"Eureka!" Lavi cried.
"Eh?"
"I'm now finally done! Come take a look at my work of art." He turns to show them.
The three are horrified at what they saw: giant blobs of cylinders and ovals roaming all around the room like there were ghosts and tentacles, colored like if someone got sick or crazy or something, and on the paper stood just a stick figure with one eye and something... coming out of it. This was his so called masterpiece!?
"Wow, I don't even know what to say..." Allen was... flabbergasted to say the least.
"Well, what do you think? Pretty incredible wouldn't you say?"
"Yeah, it's pretty stupid and painful to look at actually." Kanda replied.
"Um, what are those supposed to be?" Lenalee asked. "Are they... Akuma or something?"
"Oh Lenalee, you have such a great sense of humor!" Lavi laughed it off. "The Akuma's the small pathetic one on the paper. These on the wall are actually us looking all high and mighty over there!"
The three were once again horrified. 'Are you... fucking shitting me?' Kanda thought.
Lavi rushed over to Allen to hear about the news. "So Allen, what do ya think? Did mine blow you away with how unbelievable my drawing was?"
"Uh... yeah, it sure did Lavi." Allen replied, trying to keep a straight face.
"So... does that mean I won? Who had the better drawing?"
"Um..." Allen looked over and saw Kanda making a mean leer at him. He turned back to Lavi to see he's making puppy eyes at him... and failing miserably. "I like them both, so can we have it as a draw?"
"What? We can't have draws, there has to be a winner in the end!"
"Ok then... I guess I win then."
There was a pause. "Eh?"
"But... you didn't draw anything." Lenalee pointed out.
"Actually I did, while you guys were drawing I made one myself!" He takes out a piece of paper as it shows everyone in the Black Order smiling (except for Kanda) and having a good time relaxing... as stick figures. "I think this is the best in my book."
"Yeah, I agree." Kanda agreed.
"That looks really nice Allen, how did you do that?" Lenalee added.
"Oh, well it didn't take too long really." Allen smiled.
'So... he basically cheated then?' Lavi thought while sweat dropping. He shook his head and proclaimed happily: "Oh well, you know what? I'm glad, my drawing's in second place. At least I don't have to take orders from Yu-chan!"
Kanda glared over at Lavi. He walked over to him, tapped his shoulder, and threw him out of the window. "Well that was fun."
"Kanda what the hell did you do that for!?" Lenalee gasped.
"He was being an ass; you can't deny that for a second."
"Um, but who's going to clean up all this?"
"Just let Lavi do that, right Moyashi?" He glanced over to Allen.
"How about we go and shop for some soba as a consolation price?" Allen suggested.
"Aw fuck yeah; I'm glad you got to win in the end!" Kanda cheered and ran out the door.
"Hey, can I come?" Lavi asked.
"Sure, you can catch up with us once you're done cleaning up." The white-haired boy replied.
"You're evil..."
"And you're cute."
"Really!?"
"No."
"Aw~"
Allen and Lenalee sigh and shrug it off as they walk away to catch up with Kanda.
AN: Timcampy got bored of all this so he slept on the couch while Lavi once again got punished for his stupid actions... hopefully he'll learn someday... or I make him do so :P