Thanks be to EBT.
"I never wanted any of this to happen."
And the tears start up again.
"I wasn't thinking. I just… I wanted you to notice me so badly, and when you finally did, it was in the backseat of your car when you're in love with my best friend."
I look away and clear my throat, do my best to stop crying.
I have to stop thinking of myself as a victim, because I'm not.
I'm a big girl.
I did this on my own, to myself.
You may have played along, but Bella's the one who got thrown into it without even knowing.
She's the victim.
And she deserves more than my tears.