Chapter 16
Nessie's point of view
"Nessie? Nessie!" I heard somebody say. I pulled the covers over my head and groaned The smell was horrible. "I know you're jet legged but you've got to get up." I heard Alice say.
I growled. "Why?"
"Because Carlisle wants to examine you." she answered.
"Not good enough."
"Jacob's going to be back any second." What?! He told me I could come with him.
Once Alice saw that using Jacob as an excuse to get me up wouldn't work, she bribed me with brunch. My stomach was growling so I sat up immediately and ate a plate of food that was so big, my normal appetite would only allow me to eat a quarter of it.
"Eating for two?" Alice joked.
"Prehee much." I said with a mouthful of food.
Something made me stop and sit my fork down. Rosalie. She didn't bother to hide her enthusiasm. She was upset that I could even get pregnant and she couldn't. I thought she was happy for me. I thought she got over that. She was like a second mother to me when I was younger. Why is it the complete opposite now?
"What's wrong?" aunt Alice asked. I looked down at my stomach and then looked back up at my aunt. She wasn't happy about seeing anything but she accepted the fact of a new family member coming into the picture. She realized I was an adult now and had to make adult decisions.
"Is she mad at me?" I asked. Thankfully Alice knew what I was talking about.
"Her and Emmett went up to Alaska. If my niece's child would let me see at least something I could see how long they would be gone." I laughed as she directed the last comment to my stomach. "Don't worry about Rose. She's been thinking about this for a month now. So go ahead and finish eating."
I obeyed. While I was eating Alice was able to fill me in on tracking Akken and why he was here. She told me the whole house was boring and dull without me. Eventually my mother walked in and joined our conversation.
"We've got to set up a nursery, plan your baby shower. We also need to go shopping because I want both my nieces to look stunning." Alice listed and I let her.
"She already has clothes, Alice." Momma said to my relief.
"Yeah, but she's going to get bigger than just a little bump, Bella."
I stopped short, looking at my aunt. "Are you calling me fat?"
"It's how a pregnancy goes. You eventually get bigger, meaning you eventually get fatter."
I threw a pillow at her and giggled. My grandmother came in and sat down on the bed, joining our conversation too. It felt nice to have just us talking, but it felt weird not having Rosalie here with me.
By our chatter it seemed my aunt, mother, and grandmother were okay with it. It wasn't a joy for them to think that I could die from my pregnancy, the Volturi could us, and I was having a baby out of wedlock but I've made my decision. They can't change it.
"So what makes you think it's a girl, Alice?" Momma joked. Oh, I don't know. Maybe it's because I said so.
"Because you say it's a boy and you suck at predicting the sex of a baby. I mean, you were wrong about Nessie." Alice chided back. I could only blush for some stupid reason.
"It could be twins. A boy for Nessie. A girl for Jacob." Grandma said. No. Definitely not twins even though my grandmother could be right. Rachel and Rebecca were twins; and it would probably be a mama's boy and a daddy's girl.
"No. No twins." I heard a voice say as he came into the room. I smiled like an idiot when I saw him and my heart fluttered.
I dropped my fork as he strode over to me in a graceful way. He bent over and kissed my cheek, whispering "Hello, beautiful."
I looked at Jacob for a second, completely mesmerized by him. Then I remembered that he left and pinched him in the soft spot of his arm.
"Nessie!" Momma scolded me.
"He left!" I told her then turned to Jacob. "You said I could go!"
"And I'm keeping that promise. I had to phase and tell the pack to meet me at my house." Jacob said, rubbing his arm.
His house? Jacob wasn't staying with me? I mean if he didn't want to do that then it would be okay. But we were having this baby together, right? What if I needed him right away?
"Oh." was all I could say. Jacob laughed and leaned against the bedpost.
"How mad were they about last night?" I asked.
"Don't worry about it."
"So why do you not want twins." Alice asked Jacob.
"Two of Nessie? One's enough." Jake answered, joking at me with a smirk. I glared at him but unsuccessfully hid my blush.
Jacob waited patiently as I finished gulping down my food. He said he already ate, and would have woken me up but I was sleeping so good, that he didn't have the heart too. What I think what it really was is that if he woke me up, I would beg him to stay.
Alice took my tray and danced out the room. Next we had to handle the news Carlisle would give us about our baby. Maybe if it was good then everybody would relax.
Hopefully.
We walked hand in hand to Grandpa's office to find it halfway set up like a doctor's office. There was a bed set in the other side of the large room. There were several machines to the right. Jacob squeezed my hand tight and looked at me. I could see the panic in his eyes. I couldn't blame him. Would we be able to see our daughter or son? When Momma was pregnant with me the ultrasound wouldn't even pick up on me. Needles wouldn't puncture the embryonic sack. I have strong skin. Could the ultrasound pick up through that?
"What are you doing?" I asked. Grandpa, Uncle Jasper, and Daddy were all around a book that looked well off into its hundreds.
"Seeing if we can find anything to help." Jasper said, flipping a page.
"Are there any that are any relevance to your tribal stories that care close to Nessie's situation that might help?" Grandpa asked my Jacob.
"Not that I know of. As far as I know all our births are normal. It's when we phase that we're not the most human as ever; but I'll ask my dad if you want me too. There might be some stories that might help us." Jacob answered.
So they are going to make my baby an science experiment? Not on my watch.
After a while, Grandpa asked me if I was ready. I nodded while uncle Jasper walked out the room and my mother walked in. They moved to an off part of the space. They wanted to be here because they were my parents and the grandparents to my child. They were worried about me, and I could understand that.
As Grandpa was looking, he asked me about my symptoms. I showed him that I was sick most of the time, but it was slowly slacking off thanks to Jacob. I even told him about my fainting. He told us that it was common and I was under a lot of stress. I haven't been eating the way I should and was weak. I know I'm making up for it now. The sickness would either pass or get worse, depending on which way this pregnancy was going. It was something to monitor.
Now we were just waiting for something to pop up.
I never pictured myself as a mother but here I was. I left the love of my life. One of them. Now he was cautious about it all. We both needed to grow up. We have somebody else we have to think about. It was Kaleb's choice to leave. I shouldn't care. I'm with Jacob now. Jacob makes me whole. He loves me. Even with all the horrible things I did to him, he let me back in. He deserves a happy life, and I intended that I was going to try my hardest to make sure he does.
Okay. This baby will show up. It has too. It's one quarter vampire! That's why its going to be normal. A quarter isn't anything! It'll mostly be human.
Grandpa had to press deeper into my stomach due to my skin. Pretty soon we saw a faint image of a baby. A human's eyes couldn't pick up on it but we could.
There she was. My baby. Jacob's baby. Our baby. It was so small. So beautiful.
I smiled hugely as I looked at Jacob, who was all smiles too until he saw something on the screen. He could see my worry and motioned for me to look back at the screen. Before I did. My mother was laughing and Grandpa smiled. Daddy only squinted at the screen as if he was glaring at it. Eventually Jacob went back to smiling and looked at me.
"Apparently Esme was correct." Grandpa said. I looked back at the screen finally. No wonder why I was bigger than normal. It was the one thing I feared would happen.
I was pregnant alright. Pregnant with twins.
"How…" I trailed, looking at Jacob.
"Twins are in my family…" was all Jacob could say. It seemed like he was trying to find the answers himself. I could picture a baby. One baby. I didn't think we would have two.
"That means more shopping!" Alice chimed with excitement.
I looked at Jacob shocked. I could handle being pregnant-I was handling it. But twins? Two? Me and Jacob could do this, right?
"We can do this, huh?"
"Yeah…at least I think we can."
"That also means more danger for Nessie." Daddy said. All I could do was look at him. I was already emotional. My father was already making this hard on me. I knew I was already in danger; but could he at least smile like everybody else was?
I raised up, avoiding the eye contact of everybody. They all acted like they were happy, but thoughts don't lie. Carrying twins was dangerous. That also meant carrying two of a unknown creature.
"Let's go." I told Jacob, grabbing his hand. I don't know why I wanted to go over to where there would be more doubt and criticism.
Payback sucks.
"Where are you going?" Momma asked. I looked at her, about to walk out the door. I was close to tears and I didn't want them to see me.
"We've got to tell Billy and Rachel." I answered. I know I've been gone for a long time and I needed to be with them. But I would be back. We can't let the secret hide from Jacob's family any longer.
"But-"
"It won't take long." Pah! It'll probably take longer than "long."
I walked out and Jacob followed. "Nessie? I know it's a big shock but we can go later." Jacob said, falling in step with me.
"It's not really. I mean, me being pregnant was a small possibility so why not say the chance of me having twins is too. It's just one more life we have to ruin." I said, almost in tears. It wasn't really a big shock I was pregnant with two instead of one. I was happy about seeing my child-I mean twins. It was a shock but finding out I was pregnant was too. Go big or go home, right? Wasn't that how it was suppose to go? But having everybody doubt if I was going to live or not was a bit discouraging. "It just sucks people think I'm going to die!"
I walked into the same room I slept in and rummaged through my suitcase until I found something to wear. I found a black skirt, teal blouse, and black sandals. I checked myself in the mirror. The shirt clearly showed my belly. I didn't know if I was fat or it was the twins. I didn't care. I'd eventually have to display it. I'd rather it be sooner rather than later.
"I don't." Jacob said, appearing behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist to bring me closer to him. I stepped in his embrace as if magnets were drawing me to him.
I looked at him through the mirror. He was lying. He was terrified of loosing me again. He thought I was going to die. That was the hard part. I knew I could fight. I knew I was strong. Why can't people see that too? Why do I have to put Jacob in the spot where he has to choose between his love for me and the protection of the people he cares about.
"You do." I argued. I've seen it in his thoughts. He thinks I'm different. He's afraid that I'll run again. This time I would take away his children from him. He thinks I'm going to die. In this game, trust was like a mirror. You could always repair it. The downer was that you can always see the cracks when you see the reflection. There was cracks in our mirror. I don't think we can repair that.
"I may doubt us, but I would never doubt you." he whispered in my ear.
"Look what happen when you didn't doubt me. I told you I was too selfish to let you go, but then I shove my engagement ring that you gave me back in your face. You should doubt me." I snapped, mostly to myself.
Jacob looked away from me, tensing up. "I should. But I don't."
"Still…"
"Come on. After doing this we'll spend the rest of the evening together."
"I can't. My family-"
"Can wait."
"Oh, and yours can't?"
"Dad and Rachel don't know. Plus Will's going to be close in age with our twins so it might be best if you meet him too. Then we'll have time to relax without the worry of both our families telling us what to do or how to act. I can fight with Edward some more, and you can plan things with Alice. After that we can take it day by day." Jacob told me. He seemed like he had all this planned out. It was amazing how somebody like him could give me a second chance.
When I didn't respond, he brought me even closer to him. He nuzzled my ear which made me relax. I felt his warm breath on my neck and leaned my head back. It was like he knew just what I was thinking when he said, "Don't worry about it. It's the past. We've got more things to handle right now."
My Jacob kissed the spot behind my ear to let me know everything would be okay. I wasn't for sure on that, but might as well agree to it anyway just to keep the both of us calm. "Okay. But no more fighting. I don't really want to spend a whole nine months with tension around us." I stated.
Jacob saluted me with a grin. "Yes, master."
I laughed as we walked down the hall and to the marble, grand stairway. I realized I had my hand on my bump the whole time. Is it something that pregnant women do or is it just me?
"You're not that bad sick, are you?" Jacob asked as he took my hand.
"No. Not that much. Big shock, huh?"
"Extremely."
I shrugged. I knew I shouldn't be too excited about not getting so sick. I knew I should expect the unexpected. I've learned from the four eyes of my life that life loves to tell you one ting then eventually it throw's a curve ball and smacks you in the face. Life laughs at you when you're down rubbing your face as you try to figure out how you'll win the game.
Here's on example of a curve ball.
As we were walking down the stairs, my foot caught on the edge of my skirt and I tripped. I was about to fall face first into the marble if nobody caught me anytime soon. Instead of thinking of something logical and important, all I thought of was how bad it was going to hurt when my face connected with the marble.
Thankfully, Jacob caught me in time. As he scooped me up, I realized I was so close to him that I was practically frozen. Only my quick heart was beating as I start at Jacob's warm brown eyes. I loved him. I was in love with him. If he gave me back my payback then it would be the end of me.
My family was all crowded around us but I didn't care. It was like that moment when some moment in romance novels where the strange, mysterious guy swoops in to save the heroine's life. All the stupid girl could do was stare at his gorgeous eyes.
But the girl wasn't pregnant with twins and felt sick to her stomach like I did. There goes my romantic moment.
"I'm fine." I said then regretted it. I felt like I was going to puke. This place reeked with the smell of vampire. It was funny that I was half vampire, and these babies would be one quarter maybe. Now I can't stand the smell of being around a vampire. Or that could mean that they already have the shape-shifting gene. That could be a blessing and a curse. Blessing because it would be a lot like Jacob, and it wouldn't be that bad of an unknown creature. A curse because that means more stress on Jacob.
I was about to throw up so I carefully rushed out of the house, breathing a sigh of relief as I smelt the early signs of fall.
"Love you!" I shouted to my family, knowing they could hear me even with just a mere whisper.
"Ness!" Jake said, jogging up next to me as I walked briskly through the woods.
"What?"
"I'm not phasing. It's too dangerous for you."
"No it's not. You can run slowly or walk."
"I could move wrong and you fall off. You could get dizzy. You're kinda in a predicament where anything could be dangerous to you." Jake tried to tell me but I ignored him and kept walking.
"Are you calling me weak?"
"Right now, yeah I am."
I looked at Jacob with my mouth open. He use to say that I wasn't weak. But that was it. It was the past. Now things changed and all the cards are on the table.
"Please. Please. Please. I want to see our meadow." I begged, wrapping my arms around his neck and sticking out my bottom lip. I batted my eyelashes. "You know, they might want to see where their parents spent most of their time together."
"Or where they were conceived." my Jacob scoffed and I couldn't help but laugh.
"Please. I miss my russet wolf."
"And you don't like me. Gosh, Nessie, that hurts."
"Although, you give me better kisses when you're human." I smiled and raised up on my toes and moved my head to tease him into kissing me.
Jacob put his hand on my cheek and moved his lips to touch mine. The kiss was so gentle and so short and ended all to soon. He looked at me like he wanted to say something but decided against it.
"Fine." Jake huffed. You win; but I'm going slow. Now crazy stuff. No hoping off of wolves, no running faster than lighting, and definitely no jumping through trees, spider monkey." Jacob listed.
He acts like I'm porcelain that's going to break.
"And no fun is basically what you're saying." I knew I shouldn't give Jacob a hard time. To be honest I agreed with him. I've did so many stupid things that could hurt of babies, and I shouldn't risk it even more.
"Okay. I can easily carry you. It'll be better with my sanity anyway-or at least the last bit of it." he shrugged.
I bit my lip and shook my head no. "Okay, okay. I'll be careful. Now go phase." I giggled.
Jake huffed and ran off. I could head him only a few yards away, but waited patiently. A wave of sickness came at me and I leaned against a large oak. I remembered I would fall asleep against big trees like this one while I waited on Momma and Daddy to finish hunting. That seemed like it was a long time ago. It was. I was young back then. I was innocent. Now every decision I make is going to affect the two new little innocent ones.
With carrying twins, there was a possibility that both Jacob and I were right. We could have a son and a daughter. But it also meant that I could have double the danger. It was a shock, but as long as my two little ones were okay, I was fine.
I groaned and looked down at my stomach. They pick now for this to happen?
"But if you feel-" Jacob's wolf form thought to me but stopped when he saw the look on my face.
No. No. No. There goes my chances of seeing my russet wolf.
I spun around and my stomach heaved. Jacob rushed away and came back in human form as I coughed and gagged. He held me up as everything came back up. After I was done I leaned against his chest and let my head roll back limp. I waited for my stomach to quit rolling before I did or said, or even projected, anything.
I turned my head to look at Jacob. "I thought you said you were going too-" I projected when Jacob cut me off.
"It's too dangerous. Ness, you would be riding on the back of a wolf! I'm taking you back." Jacob said.
He picked me up and started running. I started to fight him kicking and screaming. At first he was winning, and controlling my movements, but then he started to struggle on holding me. I didn't know why I was giving him a hard time. It could be mood swings. I mean, I just threw up.
"No! We need to tell them!" I shouted.
"I will. Renesmee, you don't realize that you're not able to keep anything down! You need to stay strong!"
"I can! I have! I am!"
"You don't get it do you?! You don't get you're in danger! You do realize that it will be me who will loose you! I won't be able to breathe once you're gone. I won't be able to function! I'll be a shell! They won't have a mother or a father! Once you are gone, do you expect me to be able to take care of them?! I can't! You really want to be that selfish and take all that away from them?! You say you love them then you want to do stupid things to try and kill them?! And all this over you not being able ride on the back of a wolf!" Jacob yelled, making me jump. He sat me down and back away from me, breathing heavy.
I was speechless. He lied to me. He said I wasn't going to die when I was! I could already see him giving up even before the game even started. He would die when I would. It was only a matter of time. Our twins wouldn't have a father or mother to love them. To be there for them when they wake up from bad dreams. I could kill them.
Jacob was right as he's been all along.
"What about what we had planned?" I stupidly asked.
Jacob looked at me with disbelief. He then started toward me and gripped my forearm, yanking me to walk with him. I struggled to keep up with him as he was basically running.
"Change of plans." he simply answered, not bothering to look at me or slow down.
"No!" I spat, ripping my arm out of his grip. It burned for a few minutes but I ignored it and stood determinedly. "You're not doing this by yourself. You need me as much as I need you!"
"RENSEMEE!" My Jacob shouted-or what was left of him.
I jumped back scared then recovered. "Just hear me out! If we talk to the pack then that means loads off of your shoulders. You can focus more on me and the babies. You can focus on anything you want. Nobody has to agree with this. They don't have to understand. It's just me and you." I pleaded.
I walked up to Jacob slowly and put my hand on his cheek. "Just me and you. I'm fine. It's just a little sickness. As long as I know you and our twins are okay, then I will be." I whispered. "But I do know that I need to be there to show the pack that there is nothing to fear about these two."
"Other than the sickening pain they get when their around them." Jacob stated with no emotion.
"Then I'll bring on the tears. Who can say no to a crying, pregnant lady?"
"I can't." Jacob bit his lip then looked at me. "Okay. Fine. You can come with me. But I'm carrying you the whole way. No negotiations. If something goes wrong, I swear I will bring you back before you even know what's going on." Jacob said in a tone that I knew not to argue with.
"Deal." I said, sticking out my hand to shake.
"This is stupid. I'm not shaking your hand."
"Fine. You can kiss me then."
"Now that I like better."
Jacob picked me up and smacked his lips onto mine. I melted into his embrace, completely relaxed. I loved him. And just for that moment, I knew I was going to be okay.
~~~~~ Forever Ours ~~~~~
Jacob was amazing already. And as I was looking over the redos of his house, to me he was even more amazing. The rooms were larger, different. He said that he destroyed the place out of anger when he came back from the airport. Of course after attempting to beg me to stay. Billy made Jacob feel guilty so Jake rebuilt the whole thing. He was going to sell it and go some place where the memories of me weren't painful. Now he's got twins on the way.
Amazing how things change.
I could hear Jacob talking to everybody outside but I didn't care. I only stared at the items in my hands. I noticed them on his dresser. I never meant to pry but it was like they were calling out to me. My necklace he gave me on my third birthday, my engagement ring, and the promise bracelet. I didn't deserve any of this. I didn't deserve these two angels that I was carrying. I didn't deserve their amazing father. But I had them. I had him. Now it all felt like I could wake up and it would then be taken away from me.
I swallowed back the tears and walked to my Jacob. It felt like Jacob was the weaker one even when he had the Alpha blood going through his veins. It could be because of his position on how he was standing. Everybody was facing him. They were glaring at him. And all he did was give them an emotionless look.
The minute I walked next to Jacob, all the ones who had a gift(sort of) tensed up like Jacob always does when he's around me. Only my Jacob kept his face neutral. His thoughts said other wise.
Everybody looked at me, which made me shrink back against Jacob's arm. The pack was thinking this was dangerous. Rachel was hurt beyond belief. She was trying to protect her little brother. Karli and Kim were excited to see me. Emily had a smile on her face. Billy wasn't…surprised?
"You're pregnant." Rachel spat. Jacob said that before her hated phone call she told Jacob that I still loved him. That I needed him. She hinted that pretty soon he would be holding a baby and being a parent. It amazed me how right she was even when she never knew it. But then afterwards, she called me and yelled that I shouldn't deserve a guy like Jake drooling over me. She hoped that I would die. She hoped Jacob slap me in the face and find another woman that would truly love him. That phone call sent me into a break down.
I shrunk back even further at the tone of her voice. I was terrified. Terrified of her. I moved half of my head behind Jacob's shoulder and wrapped my arms around his waist. I couldn't do this!
"With twins." I whispered. Jacob shifted uncomfortable. When I tried to step away from him, all he would do was pull me back even closer.
"And you knew?" Rachel yelled at Paul.
He stuttered for words to Jacob easily came to the rescue. "I told them not to say anything. Me and Nessie still had some things to cover so I asked them not to say anything to anybody. We didn't need any of the mess I knew you would be giving us." Jacob snapped at his sister, coming in for his brother's defense.
Billy looked at Jacob with hurt eyes and wondered why. It was like Jacob instantly knew what was wrong and smiled apologetically at him.
"We should have. We have no clue what they are!" Jared spat. Jake still showed no emotion but I can tell he was hurt and betrayed.
There was more shouts and the pack got angrier, making the feeling worse. It made me feel worse and I got even more upset. Jacob stayed the same he started off with but only rubbed my back to calm me down.
"All of us need to calm down. None of this is going to do any good. It's not good for Nessie and some of you could phase and hurt somebody." Billy said. It was like he was taking over the position as father than as head Elder.
I noticed everybody was gripping something. Paul was gripping Rachel tight. Sam was shockingly gripping Emily tight. Embry was gripping Karli tight, and so on and so forth. Pretty soon everybody was going to get like Jake has been-including him.
"I say we give them time. We can't do anything without Jake's permission anyway." Leah shrugged. I could tell she was handling it better than any of them. But that could also be because she wasn't happy about me being pregnant but she wasn't jealous. She was happy for me and Jake, it was just the aspect of it. She believed if she quit phasing her and Kyle could have children. I felt sorry for her. She had that one percent like I did and it wasn't in her favor like it was to me.
"Leah's right. Jake's the leader. If he sees they aren't a danger then we have to deal with it." Sam chocked out.
"Leader." Paul scoffed.
"Excuse me?" Jake growled.
"You're nothing like a leader. Nessie betrayed you, but instead of telling her good-bye, you welcome her back!" Paul shouted, barely standing. By his thoughts he was seething. It scared me.
"What about Rachel?! Would you tell her good-bye?! What if she was pregnant with Will when she left? Would you be able to do that?" Jake said as he tried to stay calm for my sake.
"Don't even bring my son into this!"
"I'm just stating the facts-"
"But the kid isn't even yours!"
I didn't know if it was really Paul saying those things for the feeling they felt when they couldn't phase. All bets were off now so my guess was good as nothing.
"I would definitely watch who you're talking to, Paul. That mouth of yours will get you in trouble." Now this wasn't my Jacob. He wanted to kill like his brothers-and sister-did. His grip on my got tighter, and I tried to hide my pain like the others did.
"If you say I suck at being a leader then go ahead and take my role? You're going to have to overpower me first." Jacob continued in a tone that made everybody shut up. "If you want to kill my children, then you kill Nessie and that means you kill me-which I hope you're not stupid enough to do. If you are, then you'll have to go through me. You'll have to kill me to get to them. If you want to do that then feel free. It'll be nice to actually have relaxation."
Jacob pushed me behind him and stood ground. He warned me before not to do or say anything to make things worse. I think everything was going downhill and I haven't even said a word.
Yet.
I stepped around Jacob and started towards the others. The wolves braced for an attack, as they could barely stand. I think I saw Kyle and a few others back up like they were scared of me.
Jacob's hand grabbed my arm. I turned to look at him. The shake of his head made me come back closer to him.
"They're close to where you were." I showed him, meaning for it to be a question.
"We need to wrap it up quick. I don't want you to see it if things get to far."
"I saw you."
"No."
Jacob's voice blared in my mind, making me jump. I swallowed hard. I had to say something. To prove to them that I loved their Jacob. That I was sorry for what I did.
"I know I screwed up and I know I'm now paying for it. What I did was stupid and wrong. I'm not going to make excuses. Hate me if you want, but please don't hate Jacob and the twins." I begged. When that didn't sway their decision, I decided to put up a mental block. I was already on the verge of tears. I didn't need their thoughts to make the waterfall flow.
"HOW CAN WE GIVE A CHANCE TO TWO MONSTERS?!" Embry shouted. I looked up and for the first time I saw Seth. Happy-go-lucky Seth looked heartbroken. I had to do something.
From then on they started speaking in Quileute. Karli and I were lost. I'm assuming by the facial expressions things were going bad.
Eventually Seth let out a scream of pain and fell to the ground. He let out things that weren't Seth like. It all reminded me of Jacob. Everybody crowded around him until Jake ordered Collin to take him to the woods to phase. He looked back and forth between his pack and me, completely torn on what side he should stand by.
"The rest of you go phase. We'll talk about this later." Jake said.
"WE'RE TALKING ABOUT THIS NOW!" Jared-in his not so right state of mind-lunged at Jake, making Kim scream. Jacob easily threw him to the ground and that's where he stayed. Kim went to him but Jake held her back.
And that's when everybody was arguing, fighting. Not until Jake gave on little command that made everybody stop.
"EVERYBODY SHUT UP AND LISTEN. LET NESSIE EXPLAIN. SHE KNOWS BETTER THAN ANYBODY ABOUT HOW THESE BABIES ARE! BUT I SWEAR IF YOU LAY A HAND ON HER, I WILL PERSONALLY RIP YOU TO SHREDS AND I WON'T CARE WHO'S WATCHING!" Jake shouted. Even I could feel his Alpha command going through me.
They all turned to look at me when I realized I had fallen to the ground. I was breathing heavy-basically hyperventilating. I was scared. Jacob angry was one thing. Going against a lot of wolves who were beyond angry and four scared humans was another.
"Grandpa can see them. They're both okay. Just because one has a g-gift doesn't mean that they're dangerous. I know who I'm putting at risk, but I know they're not monsters. Believe me, it was a shock to me and Jacob as much as it is to you. They'll be like Jacob. I know it. They'll mostly be human if-or until-they phase. I can't stand the smell of a vampire. Blood makes me sick. I eat just about everything in sight. It doesn't look or sound monstrous. I'm not even as big as Momma was." I stated with a shaky voice.
Eventually more wolves fell and chaos went higher. I saw that Billy was going to get into the middle of it until one pleading look from Jake made him stop. I saw that Rachel, Kim, Emily, and Karli was scared but they didn't show it. I on the other hand was about to break down right on the ground.
"Go phase." Jake ordered. They all left willingly. Some leaning against their brothers to help stand, some stumbling away, and the rest just running.
Jacob walked over to me, completely ignoring his sister and father, and walked over to me.
"If you need to leave I'm sure somebody can take you home." Jake thought, bending down to my level and put his hand on my cheek.
"We're in this together." I got up and dusted myself off.
Rachel, Billy, and Jacob all looked at each other. I'm taking that as they want to speak with him. I was proven right when my Jake took Billy's wheelchair and wheeled him into the house, Rachel following.
I stayed frozen, almost unaware of Karli hugging me. "I'm so happy for you!" she exclaimed.
I gave her a look. "By ruining every relationship I have?" I asked. I was surprised at how nice she was to me. But we have been friends for a while too so…
"For you and Jake, silly. I mean twins!" Karli laughed but then got serious. "We have to see Abby. And I've got to call Embry. He's never held me like that before."
I didn't want to tell her about the gift one of my babies having a gift. I wasn't in the mood to even project anything. "Today. I just have something I've got to do first."
"I'll wait for you in the car. Take as long as you need." Karli said then ran off to her can. I have a feeling she had this planned.
Emily and Kim came up rubbing their arms. It worried me if Sam and Jared left bruises the same as Jake left back on the island. I knew if Emily did, Sam would never forgive himself.
"I knew it! I told you!" Emily said with conviction, giving me a hug but I caught the wince she tried to hide.
"You two are going to spoil the twins. Congratulations." Kim said.
I was left confused. Why are they so nice to me? Rachel should understand the most how I felt, but she thought I was horrible for her brother. Leah-like everybody else who couldn't have kids-felt a longing to be in my position. But Karli, Emily, and Kim were happy for me. It made me worry how Abby was.
The tears I've been holding back, the confusion, the worry, all came out. Emily saw me crying and wrapped me in a hug. "It's okay." she soothed. "It'll all settle down."
She let me cry more, which I hated because it made me want to cry more. "Why are you so nice to me?" I projected because I couldn't speak. I felt pain in my chest and knew it came from my Jacob. Hurt, anger, betrayal, longing to be with me as he heard me cry.
"We all have our ways of forgiving. And I understand."
"How?"
"Because I'm a wolf girl too. I was pregnant too, remember? I did some things to that I'm not proud of, but it all worked out. Like things will you and Jacob. You know in this family we forgive and forget until next time. Me and Sam's happy for you."
"But why am I crying so much?"
"All apart of being pregnant. With two, it's going to be even worse."
I pulled away and wiped the tears away. Just then I heard Rachel from inside. All three were arguing. I didn't know if anybody else could hear them or was it just my sharp hearing.
"She cheated on you! She left you! She dragged you through hell! And you take her back?! Have you even thought that maybe those twins she's carrying might not even be yours?! I mean, do you like being burned?!" Rachel shouted. I know I should be in there. I had to prove to them that I loved Jacob more than my own life.
"WHAT ABOUT YOU?! YOU LEFT PAUL AND HE PACKED UP AND MOVED JUST TO BE WITH YOU! YOU WERE JUST LIKE NESSIE! YOU WERE TOO PRIDEFUL AND STUBBORN TO OWN UP TO YOUR MISTAKES!"
"We'll see you next weekend. You are coming to my wedding, Renesmee Cullen. No backing out." Kim said, pointing at me while her and Emily walked off.
I dashed inside to where the other battle was going on. All three were talking-yelling-over each other. Billy was upset. Rachel was angry. Jacob was close to being on the ground. He was straining to phase. It got worse when I walked in.
"Rachel LeAnne, calm down." Billy said as he noticed what Jacob was doing. He was rocking back and forth in his chair, breathing heavy. His body was so tense I thought his skin was going to rip. I didn't want the pain for him. He didn't deserve it.
"HOW CAN I BE CALM WHEN THAT TRAMP IS HURTING MY BABY BROTHER!" Rachel shouted. Jacob snapped his head up and glared at Rachel. His eyes were filled with rage and it was clearly towards his sister.
As Jacob stood up I walked over and stood in front of him. I projected to him that it was his sister and he couldn't hurt her. He seemed to ignore what I was trying to do or it didn't register.
"Jake, what's wrong?" Billy asked as I pushed up against Jacob. He wrapped his hands around my forearms tightly, making me wince.
"Can't phase." Jacob managed to get out. He then turned to his sister. "Rachel, you told me that Nessie loved me, and then you call her and yell at her. I know you're trying to protect me, but don't. I know what I'm getting into. What you're trying to do isn't going to work. Get over Nessie and I being together."
I knew I should leave but I couldn't. Jacob shouldn't be around me and I didn't need to get upset. I just chose not to leave.
"What would Mom think?" Rachel spat instead.
Jacob threw Rachel a hateful glance. "I can make my own decisions." he growled. "Don't bring her into this."
"We know you make your own decisions, but you've also got to realize your decisions affect the tribe too." Billy said. I closed my eyes as I felt Jacob's chest right against my back.
"So you're saying to either choose love or your role as leader?!"
No-"
"I will gladly-"
"I'm not saying that. I'm simply saying that neither of you are ready. You're not married. You just got back together. Think of what you'll bring your twins into."
Jacob spat something in Quileute so I was completely lost. Despite the tension, I couldn't help but love the sound of his voice.
Focus. Focus.
I decided that I should step in. "Jake understands what he's getting himself into. He knows I can destroy his whole life. I know we're not at the best predicament to have kids. I know we're not married and that's my fault. I regret it but I can't go back and change anything. Who knows? Maybe Jacob can use these two to hang over my head to get me to stick around." I laughed, hoping to ease out some of the tension. I even went as far as projecting what we saw of the twins. As they were quite Jacob made it worse.
"We-we'll talk ab-about this lllatt-ter." my Jacob stammered, leaning his full weight against me.
I nodded at them as a polite gesture and walked outside, Jacob leaning against me. When we got outside, he looked at me with a painful expression. "I'm sorry." he thought. He's held on as long as he could and now couldn't resist. He wanted to leave before he got worse and hurt me.
I touched his cheek and pulled Jake's head to my lips. I was able to get his lips to brush mine before he pulled away, taking a few steps back and smiled wanly at me.
"Go be with your brothers. Karli can take me home." I told him. What he didn't know was that I wasn't going straight home like he expected me too. He will eventually find out and would tell me not to meddle in our friends' relationship, but this was something I had to do. Seth was miserable and Abby was probably wallowing herself in guilt. We could both understand. That's why I had to do this.
"'Kay." Jacob then headed to the woods. My heart sunk when he never told me that he loved me. I didn't expect him too. But I really wanted him too.
I walked to Karli's Toyota Corolla and got in the passenger side. She smiled at me, cranked the car and pulled off. I had to swallow back the tears that wanted to come down. Thankfully, she never asked any questions.
"So when are you due?" Karli asked.
I stared out the windshield. I really had no clue. I walked out after I found out I was having twins. I didn't even know if we were doing the whole nine month deal.
"I don't know." I answered, surprisingly laughing.
"You're joking right? Nessie. You're pregnant. With twins I might add; and you don't know when their coming?"
"We're horrible parents, huh?"
"The nursery? The baby shower? Preparing for their delivery? Nessie, these things need to be-"
"Alice has already started planning for the first two. She thinks I'm having two girls so she's going to shop for anything pink. I don't even want to think about the delivery." That part scared me. Was it going to be normal? Was I going to be like Momma. Was I going to drag Jacob through the loss again?
I knew I was going to have a daughter. That was why Kaleb loves me. I came to realize that shortly after I started calling one of them a she. Kaleb was going to imprint on my daughter. Well one of them maybe since my vision seeing aunt knew everything.
I was scared to tell Jacob. I saw the hate he has for Kaleb. It would send him over the edge if he found out. But also keeping secrets from him was what killed us. I just knew I had to think this through before I broadcasted it to everybody.
"Do you have a plan on what to do with Abby?" Karli asked she brought me back into reality.
"I'll cross that bridge when I get there." I showed her. She pressed her lips into a tight line. "Why?"
"You are the reason why everybody is so riled up. You're the reason why Abby broke up with Seth." she told me. She wasn't angry, but it was like she was telling me facts. But it still hurt that I was the reason why everything here fell apart. Jake, the pack, my family and friends…it was all because I didn't own up to my mistakes. I rejected my mate and o imprint. I hope my twins won't have to suffer from this too.
"What about you and Emb." I choked out, regretting speaking.
Karli knew that I was about to break down but she didn't press it. "I've always been insecure-but you know that. I always thought some other girl would come and Embry would fall in love with her. I was afraid that I wasn't really his chosen one and he just wanted some pretty girl to flaunt. Then I started begging him to stop phasing when I knew he wasn't ready. And then what happen with Jake made me even more worried. I saw how different he was. Everybody treated him like a ticking time bomb except you. He was a lot calmer"
I remembered that. A few weeks after Jake was bit, he was different. Angier. More shut off. Quiet. My parents were so afraid that he would loose his control and hurt me. But I was the one that actually kept him calm. I even remembered back to a few days when Grandpa told Jake not to phase so his body could heal. He practically lost it. And then when he phased when I was only millimeters away from him…it made me scared of him. For the first time in my life, I've been scared of Jacob when I was the one that was more dangerous than him.
"You decided to break your own heart so he wouldn't break it." I finished for her as if I was millions of miles away.
"Funny how things turn out, huh?"
I wanted to get off of that conversation. I was loosing the battle against the tears. "Maybe if I got Abby to the wedding next weekend, we can set up an intervention. Jake can bring Seth, force them to talk, and then let them do the rest of the work." It sounded pretty solid. I just had to get Abby and Seth agree to actually go. And convince Jake too.
"Sounds good to me." Karli said.
We rode the rest of the way to Abby's in silence. It started to rain slightly, and my nerves picked up into high gear. I put my hand on my stomach and thought of what I saw on that screen. That calmed down. I just knew after this I would need a good cry and Jacob needed to vent. He would be exhausted due to straining and I would be wide awake.
"Here we are." Karli sang, pulling up to Abby's house. We got out and walked through the drizzle.
We walked up to Abby's door and knocked. Her mother opened the door much to my luck. She smiled at Abby but looked at me with shock, her eyes traveling down to my stomach. I placed my hand over it, thinking it might hide the little bump I had while Susan's eyes got big and her thoughts blared with shock. Abby told her I was studying in London. Now she wasn't so sure. Like everybody else would think, I either ran to hide my pregnancy or Jake wasn't the father.
"Nessie?" Susan sputtered. She looked exactly like her daughter. Same hair. Same nose. Same eyes. It was like I was looking at an older version of my friend.
I smiled and nodded. "Hello." I mused. She moved away from the door to let us in.
"Please, sit down. It's been a while since I've seen you. Abby said you were studying in London." Susan motioned for us to sit down on the couch, and to be polite we did. What we really needed was to see Abby.
"I was." I answered. Might as well tell half the truth.
"She must know you're pregnant." Karli thought.
"It's not that hard to hide when I'm wearing a tight shirt."
"Got a good cover story."
No.
"What were you studying? I heard you wanted to practice medicine."
"I decided to take a few classes in literary arts. Carlisle suggested I wait a few years. Now I see why." I lied smoothly, gesturing to my stomach. Actually, I'm glad I waited for college. I would have to pull out after I found I was pregnant. I'm glad I listened to that little voice in my head to not go.
"Then why didn't you stay in London for your pregnancy? I'm sure your family could travel to wear you were staying."
"Jake wanted to take her to Brazil for her birthday." Karli chirped in, coming to my rescue when I was at loss for words.
"How was it?" Really?
"It was great…until Jake got sick. He felt so guilty that I had to take care of him while I'm having morning sickness. So now Carlisle is taking care of him and me." I laughed. Luckily she believed it.
"Well, how is he?"
"Coming along."
"We hate to be rude, but we really need to see Abby." Karli said, again, coming to my rescue.
"You know where she is. Poor thing hasn't been the same since she broke up with Seth. I don't see why she did. He was such a nice young man."
We thanked her and walked to Abby's room. Karli knocked on the door but there was no answer. Like drama queen she was, Karli thought the worse thing possible. I only laughed. I could clearly hear the loud, banging music coming from her headphones.
I turned the doorknob and walked into her room. Abby looked up from her book with swollen, blood shot eyes as her mouth slacked open. She took her headphones off and looked at me. "Nessie?"
"It's me in the flesh." I projected.
"She's pregnant, Abbs! Can you believe it?! We're going to be aunts!" Karli squealed with excitement. Normally with something like this Abby would be excited over but nothing happen. Her face never changed.
I walked over to the bed and sat down next to Abby. Karli sat on the other side and took her hand. Abby could only stare straight. She didn't look at us. She seemed fine on the outside, but the guilt was eating her up on the inside. She needed Seth as much as he needed her.
"So you're really pregnant?" Abby asked, her voice cracking at the end. "Thought you said you couldn't have any?"
"That one percent made something out of itself. Better yet, I'm having twins. Karma can suck, huh?" I laughed. She only nodded.
I could hear her thoughts. She wants Seth back. I didn't want her going through but I went through. Just mine was different. I needed Jacob like she needed oxygen to breathe. I yearned for him. Craved for him. I chose him as my mate. Jake and I were a huge difference than anybody else.
"Abby, Seth needs you." Karli said. A few tears slipped down Abby's face.
"Are you back with Jake?" she thought.
"Yes, he took me back." I answered. "He's an idiot for doing so but we can't live without each other. And the babies need a whole family. Not a broken up one."
"Seth needs you." I whispered. "He'll take you back."
"He won't."
"He will."
"How do you know? You're not the expert in relationships. You're the one that's knocked up in the first place."
That was like a slap in the face but sadly it was true.
"Because when you love someone, you love them even when they have make mistakes. If they didn't have flaws then what beauty is there? We should love someone who makes ecstatic to be alive."
And that's when I knew for sure Jacob was my mate and Kaleb would never stand even close to how Jacob is to me. He never made me feel as if I was so happy to be alive. Despite leaving Jacob, I also fought to be with him. I fought to live even when I wanted to die because he made me see how much I would have lost. I fought to be with him when he was bit. I'll fight for him now. I thought before I had nothing to loose. I was wrong. Everything I have can be lost. Jacob was my love. He made me happy that I was able to wake up in the morning.
"I so screwed up." Abby said, now sobbing.
"He'll forgive you. Just like Jake and Embry did us." Karli said but Abby shook her head no.
"Come on, Abbs. Remember what I told you when I was in London. Do you remember how close I was to calling Jacob up and begging him to take me back. Our relationship is so strained now because I was too prideful to speak to him. Don't let that happen to you and Seth." I said, or pleaded was more like it.
"No." Abby spat.
I got up and my head started to spin. I plopped back down on the bed so I wouldn't fall. I couldn't find my voice no matter what I did so I projected to my friend instead. "Fine. We can do it the hard way then."
I got up again but slower this time. Karli and I walked to the door. Before I stepped out, I turned back to Abby. "I'll be here around four to get you ready. See you next weekend." I winked and walked out the door.
As we both ran through the rain and sat down in Karli's car, we suddenly went into a fit of giggles that eventually led to tears. For out mistakes and for Abby's. For me being pregnant. For Jake and Embry. For everything.
Now I just had to get Jake to help me with this plan.
~~~~~ Forever Ours ~~~~~
"I'm glad you're home." Grandma said as I walked through the door.
"Do I need to leave?" I asked with a smile.
"Funny." she said, playfully popping me on the thigh as I sat down beside her.
"Me and you do." my mother said. Really? I just sat down!
She dragged me up and pulled me out the door. I trudged behind her with a pout. I really didn't want to go any other place except somewhere comfy and with my Jacob.
"Why?" I whined. "I don't want to go anywhere."
"We figured that it would be easier on you if you were away from our scent. So while you were gone, we set up the cottage for you and Jake." Momma said. I then realized we were talking over that stupid bridge everybody was arguing over.
"I thought Grandpa would want me to be close by?" I asked as the wind picked up and blew my mother's scent my way. I could puke.
"He feels that it could possibly be normal. We're not at ease for you to be by yourself so get use to that."
"I've been living by myself before. I was pregnant when I lived in London." I blurted. I didn't realize I said that until a stabbing pain shot through my chest.
"Well then it might make things better between you and Jake if you didn't have your nosy family in the same house." my mother smiled. It faltered when she saw my scrunched up face. It was going to be extremely hard to be pregnant and their mother's side of the family was nothing but vampires. How would they be able to be around me when I smell slightly like a vampire?
We got to the cottage, which was lit up, and my heartbeat quickened instantly. Jacob was here. Jacob was here! It took all of my control not to run through the door and check every room for him. The fire was going and it felt like home. But I needed to find my true home.
"We have all of your and Jacob's stuff in here. The kitchen's fully stocked for you, my grandchildren, and Jacob." I flinched when Momma struggled to say grandchildren. And for some reason the flood gates opened.
Momma saw my face and pulled me into a hug. That made it worse. The pain of not having Jacob with me was only making it harder. Where was that idiot?!
"You don't have to do this. If you're not ready-"
"I want this!" I didn't say that I wasn't ready because what I would answer would be a lie. I wasn't even close to being a mother, much less a mother of two. I had to do this though. I wanted this. I couldn't cower away anymore.
"Okay…Jake's out back; and try to get out of being jet legged. Sleep should be your number one priority right now." Momma said, wiping the tears away.
"Coming from a vampire?"
She brought me into another hug. A comforting hug. I was able to relax. "I love you, Renesmee."
"I love you too." I whispered. She kissed my forehead and wisped away.
I walked down the hall and into the large bedroom, making my way to the sliding glass door. I saw my russet wolf laying on the ground next to the stone wall in the rose garden. I took off my sandals and stepped outside, letting my feet walk on the cool ground.
I walked up to Jacob and wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my head in his fur. I could see in his thoughts that he was exhausted but also hurt. It was hurting him to know that his mother and other sister wouldn't be there to watch his children grow. The pain became even worse as he thought about how much he's missed him mother.
"You okay?" I asked. I crawled on his back and started scratching the spot underneath his jaw.
He leaned into my hand. "I guess so." he thought. "You?"
"I'm pregnant with your twins. What do you think?" I joked.
"True."
I could tell he wanted to talked to me but he didn't. Not just having a nonchalant conversation, but the need to vent type. He didn't want to have people in his head when he brought up the subjects. When's he human, I'll tell him about my plan for Seth and Abby. I'll get him to agree when I've got him at his weakest point. Plus Seth was in wolf form so I knew it wouldn't work if he found out.
As we laid there, me continuing to scratch Jacob, I head a strange noise coming from his chest up to his throat. Was he…purring?
"Are you purring?"
"In a dog's form, yeah."
I moved to lay down next to him, curling up as close as I could get. I moved my head into his soft fur, loving to just be near him.
"I had plans to take a drive to nowhere. Just me and you. Sorry it didn't happen."
"That's fine. Like you said, plans change. I'm happy now. I missed you." I rambled.
"Do all pregnant women get sappy and emotional?" I saw Collin ask though Jake's mind.
I laughed. I was sappy and emotional.
"Very." Sam answered. Jake felt Collin shiver.
"And with Ness it's times two." Paul laughed. "So Jake's screwed."
I was shock they weren't acting like they hated me. They were joking. Maybe Emily was right when they forgive and forget until next time.
"She was moody before so it won't be much of a difference. It'll probably be my luck and she'll be worse." my Jacob said. That struck a nerve. He just called me moody!
"Did you forget that I'm right beside you?" I snapped. Jacob started to stutter so I got up and walked back into the house, closing the sliding door and locking it. Jacob phased back to man and walked to the door. He tried to open it but I couldn't. I knew that he could have easily got in but that would have meant putting in a new door.
"Let me in." Jake ordered.
I'm not one of your brothers! You can't tell me what to do!" I spat, crossing my arms over my chest in determination.
"Please." he begged. I shook my head no. "What did I do?"
I rolled my eyes. Like he didn't know. "You called me moody!" I shouted, stomping my foot which made Jake laugh. Glad to know I'm his little comedy show.
"Can you let me in…please." Jacob gave me one of those looks that was making my stubbornness crumble. When I didn't he started making whining noises as if he was still wolf. He poked out his bottom lip and looked at me in an innocent way. He was doing this on purpose.
Whatever! Might as well.
I unlocked the door and he came through, shutting it. We were both soaking wet and we both did not care. Jacob wrapped me up in a bone crushing hug.
"I thought you said you were okay?"
"I can't hug you just because I want too?"
"You can. I just know something's bothering you." I didn't really know. He didn't say anything. He didn't act like it. I could just feel it. Like I was in his body.
I led him out of the bedroom and into the closet. Jacob slipped on a pair of sweat pants while I got into some of my pajamas. We walked into the kitchen to eat.
As we ate in silence, I got aggravated. My-his-feeling got worse. It was all I could think about. I even lost my appetite and concentrated on what was wrong. "Why don't you just tell me what's going on!" I exasperated, storming into the living room.
Jacob followed me and sat down on the couch beside me. He laid his head on my shoulder and put his hand on my stomach. "I just wished people could see what I see." he whispered to my stomach, but I knew he was talking to me.
"What?" I asked. "What do you see?"
"Somebody who's beautiful. Somebody who knows that she did something wrong. Somebody who I'm falling hard in love with again." Jacob said finally looking at me.
"My Jacob, I never really asked you this but…are you happy about everything? You have you're tribe-"
"I'm tired of hearing about that crap." Jake growled. Now we were on the same level. "It sucks when you have your family making you choose duty or love."
My family sort of did that to me, but they didn't say either us or your children. Once they saw that these babies weren't going nowhere, they dropped it. I told them what I wanted and they accepted it. Jake's pack was skeptical because of my background. I have vampire blood running through me. The twins will too. It's in their blood to be cautious of my kind.
I had that strange feeling again. Like I was in Jake's body, feeling his emotions. He felt torn. Even worse than before. "Then choose what you think is best." I answered with a smile.
"You." he breathed. "I want you."
I wanted to tell him that wanting and needing was two different things but I only smiled instead. It killed me that I wanted to keep my theory away from Jacob. I could be wrong. I prayed I was. Things were too early to tell. I might just be subconsciously making excuses for the mistakes I made.
I realized my Jake never answered my question. "What do you think, Jake? Do think I'm a monster? A tramp? That your possible son and daughter are something that could destroy everybody? Do you love them? Do you love me?"
"No, no, no, yes, and definitely yes. You three are not monsters. Will never be. I love all three of you." Jacob said. I bit my lip and blushed. "What makes you think we're having a son and a daughter? We could have two boys. Or even two girls-which would be bad for my sanity." Jacob said huskily then with the last part as consideration.
I really didn't know if I was having a boy and a girl. It was too early to tell. But I had a feeling it was a girl. At least one of them. Kaleb's feelings for me are similar to what Jacob's were to Momma's.
"Make it fair." I shrugged. "So you are happy about this?"
My Jacob was hesitant for a moment. "I just wish things were different. I've accepted that I am going to be a father. You kind of learn to accept something you can't explain entirely when you have nothing to do but think a lot for two and a half months-or when you imprint of a half vampire. You have your choices like I have mine."
I let him lay his head down in my lap. He won't be able to do it anymore real soon so he needs to enjoy it now. I ran my hands through his black hair and looked down at him. "I don't deserve you. You're too amazing."
"This is going to be a long nine months." Jacob said in a serious tone of voice.
"How?"
"You."
"What about me?"
"Nothing. I love you, crazy girl." Jacob said then turn to my stomach. "And I love you, my two little monsters." he kissed my stomach and I giggled.
He wanted this situation, but just coming up to it he wanted different. He came to realize that they would need a father no matter how hurt he was. He realized that out of all the people, I needed him the most.
Jacob looked up at me with heavy eye lids. He was tired. He was so tired that he actually thought I was going to leave. I wasn't. The only leaving I would do was to get something to eat when my cravings kicked up again.
"Sleep, my Jacob. You're exhausted." Partly because I was making him be by running my hands through his hair.
"No…" yawn "I'm not."
I realized a long time ago that when I want something that I know Jake's not going to do, I get him when he's half asleep; and with me relaxing him, he was an easy target.
"I'm not going anywhere. I promise you." I reassured. He relaxed even more and closed his eyes. I don't even think he knows I'm speaking or that he actually was falling asleep.
"I know how to get Abby and Seth back together." I said instead of projected because I knew he would think that he was dreaming if I projected anything.
"How?" he breathed. Yeah…he's asleep or he would be telling me to stay out of it.
"Jared and Kim's wedding."
"Cool."
"You just have to make sure Seth shows up and stays there, and Karli and I will get Abby there."
"Mmm-hmmm."
"So you'll do it?"
"What…ever." Jacob finally breathed. After only a few minutes Jacob's snores were the only thing I heard.
I got a blanket and put it over him, knowing he wouldn't notice or need it. He looked so adorable. It was like all the worries in the world slip off his shoulders and he's innocent. He's not son, brother, uncle, leader, chief, friend, imprinter, baby daddy, father. He was just Jake. He was just my Jake.
I bent down and laid a kiss on his forehead. All he did was smack his lips, turn his head and went back to snoring. I could go into labor and he'd never know. He was dead to the world.
Okay. No more using that analogy.
I would have to figure out how to tell Jacob that his daughter might someday fall in love with his most hated person on his kill list. If I was carrying a boy-which I probably was-I wonder how he would take it? How would I take it? How would Kaleb take it?
I pushed that to the back of my mind as I switched on the television. I choose Jacob. I will choose him over and over again.