AN: stop f,aing ok hargrid is a pedo 2 a lot of ppl in amerikan skoolz r lik dat I wunted 2 adres da ishu (Uh I live in America and yes that CAN be true but we don't need to read about it…)! how du u no snap iant kristian plus hargrid isn't really in luv wif ebony dat was sedric ok! (Cedric is DEADRIC and because it's Snap—er Snape!)
I was about to slit my wrists again with the silver knife that Drago (I assume you mean Draco. Random fact that you probably know, Draco is Latin for Dragon ^_^) had given me in case anything happened to him (Oh that's a lovely present. Maybe on your anniversary he can give you A CHAINSAW!). He had told me to use it valiantly (Ooh she used a big word.) against an enemy but I knew that we must both go together (Go where? To hell? Ok! It's really nice this time of year! Not that I would know or anything… *shifty eyes*).
"NO!" I THOUGHT IT WAS HAIRgrid but it was Vampire. He started to scream. "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS (I am about to die from laughing at the thought of Daniel Radcliffe as Harry running around screaming, "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!")!" and then... his eyes rolled up (Ewie)! You could only see his red whites.
I stopped. "How did u know?" (How did he know what? How Pretty Little Liars ends? 'Cuz I wanna know…)
"I saw it! And my scar turned back into the lightning bolt (:D If we're lucky, he'll go back to his canon and then turn everyone else back to canon and then shoot Ebony OUT of a cannon!)!"
"NO!" I ran up closer. "I thought you didn't have a scar anymore (HE WILL ALWAYS HAVE THAT SCAR!)!" I shouted.
"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram (*snort* What'd he do? Carve one on your forehead—oh…) for me and I always cover it up with foundation." he said back. "Anyway my scar hurt (His scar senses were tingling!) and it turned back into the lightning bolt (YES!)! Save me (NO!)! then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco...Volfemort has him bondage (You mean hostage? I don't know who this "Volfemort" is, but I love you!)!"
Anyway I was in the school nurse's office (I believe it is called…THE HOSPITAL WING!) now recovering from my slit wrists. Snap and Loopin and HAHRID (Why is Hagrid's name always giant? Is that supposed to be funny? 'Cuz it's NOT!) were there too. They were going to St. Mango's (St. Mango's? What is that? A giant, magical, mango?) after they recovered cause they were pedofiles and you can't have those fucking pervs teaching in a school with lots of hot gurlz (I hope you aren't including yourself in with those "hot gurlz" . *Sassy voice* 'Cuz girl, you so ugly you make blind kids cry!). Dumbledore had constipated (He should try more fiber in his diet.) the cideo camera they took of me naked (BURN IT!). I put up my middle finger at them.
Anyway Hargrid came into my hospital bed holding a bouquet of pink roses (Well that's nice, I guess. But there's gotta be a catch!)
"Enoby I need to tell u somethnig." he said in a v. serious voice, giving me the roses.
"Fuck off." I told him. "You know I fucking hate the color pink anyway (Didn't you're parents ever teach you to be GRATEFUL! This kid needs a spanking…) (That sounded wrong…) and I don't like fucked up preps like you." I snapped. Hargrid had been mean to me before for being gottik (*Assumes wise position* Young Ebony, never fight fire with fire. You shall just get a bigger fire…hehehe we all know that's not true XD *Goes to get a knife to stab Ebony with*).
"No Enoby." Hargrid says. "Those are not roses (Tulips? Daffodils? Snapdragons?)."
"What, are they goffs too you poser prep?" I asked cause I was angry that he had brought me pink roses (So you're mad 'Cuz he bought u the wrong gift? Brat.).
"I saved your life!" He yelled angrily. "No you didn't I replied." "You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video (What's Paris got to do with this?) made from your shower scene and being vued by Snap and Loopin (Yea but you would have ended up committing suicide or something if it got out so technically he did…DAMN YOU HAGRID!)." Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong) (Yes it is.) to it he added silently.
"Whatever!" I yelled angirly. (Angirly…the girly way of being angry!)
He pointed his wand at the pink roses. "These aren't roses." He suddenly looked at them with an evil look in his eye and muttered Well If you wanted Honesty that's all you haD TO SAY! .
"That's not a spell that's an MCR song." I corrected him wisely (YOU? WISE! BWHAHAHAHAHA XD).
"I know, I was just warming up my vocal cordes (*snorts*)." Then he screamed (*jumps a mile* WHAT THE? IS THERE A DYING DOG SOMEWHERE? Oh it's just you Hagrid). "Petulus merengo mi kremicli romacio(4 all u cool goffic mcr fans out, there, that is a tribute! specially for raven I love you girl!)imo noto okayo (. Whatso?)!"
And then the roses turned into a huge black flame floating in the middle of the air. And it was black. Now I knew he wasn't a prep. (Is ANYONE in this story a prep?)
"OK I believe you now wtf is Drako (What the fuck is Draco? Draco is a poor, arrogant, yet extremely sexy, guy that is under your evil "goffic" spell…oh she meant WHERE the fuck is Draco.)?"
Hairgrid rolled his eyes. I looked into the balls of flame but I could c nothing (Stick your head into it and look. I dare you.).
"U c, Enobby," Dumblydore said, watching the two of us watching the flame. "2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT (…No.)) u mst find urslf 1st, k (They lost it a looong time ago…just saying…)?"
"I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN (I just pictured him saying that like a little girl and laughed like a hyena.)!" Hargrid yelled. dUMBLydore lookd shockd. I guess he didn't have a headache or else he would have said something back (Dude, when are you going to accept the fact that he never had a headache and you are just an IDIOT!).
Hairgrid stormed off back into his bed. "U r a liar, prof dumbledoree!" (What is he TALKING about?)
Anyway when I got better I went upstairs and put on a black leather minidress that was all ripped on the ends with lace on it. There was some corset stuff on the front. Then I put on black fishnets and black high-heeled boots with pictures of Billie Joe Armstrong on them. I put my hair all out around me so I looked like Samara from the Ring (if u don't know who she iz ur a prep so fuk off! (If I hadn't watched the end of that movie with my cousin I could have left DX)) and I put on blood-red lipstick, black eyeliner and black lip gloss. (Am I the only one getting EXTREMELY sick of her annoying, CONSTANT outfit descriptions?)
"You look kawai (What the fuck does that mean…), girl." B'loody Mary said sadly. "Fangs (geddit (You used this joke at the very beginning. It wasn't funny then, and it's not funny now)) you do too." I said sadly too, but I was still upset. I slit both of my wrists feeling totally depressed (Right in front of her? O.o) and I sucked all the blood (Eww DX). I cried again in my bathroom and put the shades on so Snap and Loopin couldn't spy on me this time (Why they would want to in the first place I shall never understand.). I went to some classes. Vampire was in the Hair of Magical Magic Creatures (Hair of Magical Magic Creatures? XD Is that like identifying what hair goes to what creature?). He looked all depressed because Draco had disappeared and he had used to be in love with Draco. He was sucking some blood from a Hufflepuff (Wait, I'm a Hufflepuff…YOU ARE DRINKING FROM ONE OF MY PEEPS! I WILL RESCUE YOU MY FELLOW HUFFLEPUFF!).
"Hi." he said in a depressed way. "Hi back (Who says "Hi back"?)." I said in an wqually said way.
We both looked at each other for some time. Harry had beautiful red gothic eyes so much like Dracos. Then... we jumped on each other and started screwing each other (:O in front of the Hufflepuff? THAT POOR THING!).
"STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!" shouted Professor McGoggle (Yea, YOU TELL THEM MCGOGGLE!) who was watching us and so was everyone else.
"Vampire you fucker!" I said slapping him. "Stop trying to screw me. You know I loved Draco (Oh yea I can see her thought process now, "Oh shit! There are people here and one of those poser preps might tell Draco I fucked Vampire! I better pretend he's trying to rape me so that people don't think I'm a slut! I should slap him too!")!" I shouted and then I ran away angrily.
Just then he started to scream. "OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS (XD I will never NOT laugh at the thought of Daniel Radcliffe doing that.)!" and then... his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.
"NO!" I ran up closer.
"I thought you didn't have a scar anymore!" I shouted. (I think Ebony is getting a little forgetful. WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS!)
"I do but Diabolo changed it into a pentagram for me and I always cover it up with foundation." he said back (O.o I think he's getting forgetful too). "Anyway my scar hurt and then I had a vision of what was happening to Draco...Volfemort has him bondage (What. The. Hell? WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS!)!"
SPECIAL FANGZ 2 RAVEN MY GOFFIX BLOOD SISTA WTF UR SUPPOZD 2 RIT DIS (YOU'RE THE WRITER! NOT HER!)!11111111
HEY RAVEN DO U KNOW WHERE MY SWEATER (BURN THE SWEATER RAVEN!)I