AN: Thanks to everyone who's reviewed and added this to their favorites and subscriptions :D I'm glad I can make u people laugh when reading about Ebony's terrifying life. I love you all and no matter how hard this is, I shan't give up on you!...No matter how much I really…really…want to… *eye twitch*….anyway…to Hell's Hogwarts!
AN: dhut da fok up biches!1 ur jus jelos koz I gut 10000 reviowz (Uh 9999 of those reviews are flames.)!1 fangz 2 raven 4 da help n telin me bout da boox gurlu rok letz go shopin 2getha (Like omg let's go to Justice!)!
The door opened and Proffesor Rumbridge and Cornelia Fudge stomped out angrily (Heh Dumbledore must have tried to convert them to being goths.). Then Dumbledum (Dumbledum xD he sounds like a character on a kids show.) and Rumbridge sawed u (SHE CUT YOU IN HALF WITH A SAW? Yesss!)
"MR. WAY (See, even Rumbridge knows you're a dude.) WHAT THE BEEP (What the beep? XD) ARE YOU DOING!" Rumbridge shouted angrily. Dumbledore blared at her (Blared o.O?).
"Oops she made a mistake!" he corrupted her. "She means hi everybody cum in!" (Nice cover Dumbledum.)
Well we all came in angrily. So did all the other students. I sat between Darkness and Draco and opposite B'loody Mary. Crab and Goyle started 2 make some morbid jokes. They both looked exactly like Ville Vollo (Wait, what? Ugh.). I eight some Count Chocula and drank som blood from a cup (Okay 1, EW! And 2, where did it come from? You're in Dumbledum's office!). Then I herd someone shooting angrily (*sigh*). I looked behind me it was...Vampire! He and Draco were shooting at eachother (What did you do this time Ebony?).
"Vampire, Draco WTF?" I asked. (Okay lemme ask you something, if you hate preps so damn much then why the hell do you talk like one?)
"You fucking bustard!" yelled Draco at Vampire. "I want to shit next to her!1" (Why shit next to her when you can shit ON her?)
"No I do!" shouted. (Shouted Vampire I assume?)
"No she doesn't fucking like u, you son of a bitch!" yelled Draco (*raises hand* Um well they almost screwed in front of one of my Hufflepuff peeps, so yea.).
"No fuck you motherfucker she laves me not you (Ebony loves anyone who's a "goff" so put the claws away chica's and MOVE ON!) !" shouted Vampire. And then... he jumped on Draco! (no not in dat way u perv (Well you're the one who has made this story like that! Of course at first glance I'm gonna think it was in "That way". God damn!)) They started to fight and beat up each other (*Gets popcorn and juice box* CHICK FIGHT! CHICK FIGHT!).
Dumbldore yelled at them but they didn't stop. All of a sudden... a terrible man with red eyes and no nose flew in on his broomstick (Aww you broke up the fight Dx! That's it! This writer is officially on protest! *turns away angrily*). He had no nose (*cough* You mentioned this. *cough*) and was wearing a gray robe. All the glass in the window he flew thru fell apart (Well DUH.). Britney that fucking prep started to cry (Of course she cry's cuz you know, she's a prep.). Vampire and Draco stopped fighting...I shopped eating (Okay, protest over! You were eating the whole time this was going on? This isn't a movie where you sit there eagerly eating your little popcorn and sipping your juicey box as you await the climax of the movie…Oh wait, I did xD)...Everyone gasped. Da room fell silent...Volzemort! (And here I thought it was gonna be PINKY PIE FROM MY LITTLE PONIES!)
"Eboby...Ebony..." Darth Valer (Darth Valer? Does she mean Darth Vador? THAT IS SO COOL!) sed evilly in his raspy voice. "Thou havfe failed ur mission (What is it with all the bad guys speaking with the whole Shakespeary talk. That wasn't in the evil genius handbook I got…Oh wait it must still be Voldy T-T Damn it.). Now I shall kill thou and I shall kill Vampire as well. If thou does not kill him before then I shall kill Draco too!" (It's like Nike's slogan; JUST DO IT!)
"Plz don't make me kill him plz!" I begged. (Yea don't! That way you can kill them all!)
"No!" he laughed crudely. "Kill him, or I shall kill him anyway!" Then he flew away cackling (That's my special boy! :D).
I bust into tears. Draco and Vampire came to contort me. Suddenly my eyes rolled up so they looked all cool and gothic (How would you know if they looked cool and gothic? YOU CAN'T SEE IT!). I had a vision were I saw some lighting flash and then Voldremot coming to kill Draco while Draco slit his wrists in a depressed way (No I thought he was cutting himself in a HAPPY way.).
"No!" I screamed sexily (I wish I could scream sexily. There is so many things that Ebony can do it's almost impossible. Oh wait, IT IS!). Suddenly I locked up and stopped having the vision.
"Ebony Ebony aure you alright?" asked Draco in a worried voice (Eh she'll be fine. Tell her to walk it off.).
"Yeah yeah." I said sadly as I got up.
"Everyfing's all right Enoby." said Vampire all sensitive (Right, just that you all are gonna die.).
"No its not!" I shouted angrily (o.o Whoa there.). Tearz of blood went down my face. "OMFG what if I'm getting possessed like in Da Ring 2 (I swear she's being paid to advertise this stuff. "What if I'm getting possessed like in-*looks into camera and grins*-Da Ring 2!)!"
"Its ok gurl." said B'loody Mary. "Maybe u should ask Proffesor Sinister (O.o Who?) about what the visions mean though."
"Ok bich (Now me and my friend Meg call each other bitch and other lovely affectionate terms just to mock Ebony. Quite hilarious.)." I said sadly and den we went.