The-Boy-Who-Lived-To-Mess-Up-The-Plot

by MaidOfLife-abandoned

The memory of Tom Riddle gestured dramatically at the unconscious Ginger by his feet. "It's pointless to try to save her, you know. I'm stealing her magi-" "Don't care." "...What?" "Nope, she stole my favorite quill last week. She can fend for herself." Crack. No pairings.

3. In Which Harry Discovers Playboy

In Which Harry Discovers Playboy

"What do you see, boy?" Quirrelmort demanded the Boy-Who-Lived-To-Be-A-Pain-In-The-Arse as he stepped up beside him to gaze into the mirror.

Harry ignored him in favor of staring, awestruck, at the reflection. The image was of him, surrounded by scantily clad women in what appeared to be bunny outfits.

And so it was that Harry discovered the joys of Playboy. James and Sirius would be proud.

After a while of Potter being distracted by Playboy Bunnies and being almost completely unresponsive to any of the ways Voldemort tried to get his attention (as he very well should be; one does not simply ignore the Bunnies), the Very-Dark-Grey-More-Like-Charcoal Lord (because 'Dark Lord' isn't descriptive enough, he had decided, and charcoal was much more sinister-sounding) just gave up and left.

Harry didn't notice. One of the Bunnies was feeding his mirror-self some grapes.

Sorry it's so short. I promise they won't all be as short as this! Also, sorry if you don't like the Bunnies; they'll probably be mentioned a few times throughout the fic, but they won't be a central theme.