XIII. The Cruelty of Love

From then on Mary noticed an unhidden rage in Daniel that exposed itself whenever H.W. was around. Like with the men, their relationship between father and son abscessed rapidly. There must have been a heated trade of words between parent and child that she was ignorant about yet whatever it was H.W. paid it no mind. She concluded that the younger Plainview had mentioned to his father the concerns he had about the business. The tacit animosity unnerved her and she grew fearfull of what Daniel was capable of doing to her boyfriend. When she attempted to cajole what was wrong out of him, Daniel advised her gently to never mind and when she asked if it was because it was men's business he assured her it was a father/son issue. She left it at that seeing how he clenched his jaw and wise in knowing that the muscle tension was a trigger for his rage to fulminate.

Four days later with no more nocturnal visits from Daniel made Mary remunerate on the cruel subreption she was masked in to conceal her unruly sexual encounters from H.W. who gave no inkling of suspicion. It could've been because he was overly worried about the business that he couldn't see the obvious erotic interest she had for Daniel. She loved them both deeply and denying that love for either one would be committing perjury against her heart. She always knew that there would be a day when she would have to choose between them and that day came at the end of those four days when, during a picnic on the beach, H.W. asked her to marry him.

At first she was thunderstruck and unable to speak. As she stared open-mouthed at the gorgeous engagement ring with a diamond large enough to make Eli reconsider his sexuality to possess it, she searched listlessly for words to answer. Waterfalls of tears pouring down her cheeks, she nodded acceptance then threw her arms around his neck. The young couple fell into a series of celebratory kisses and Mary wept with joy because she was positive that she made the right choice and amazed that she made it without hesitation.

Don't tell father just yet, H.W. asked. We should wait to tell him together. But not any time soon. He has enough on his mind. I find him to be very distracted lately. Besides, I want to preserve this secret so that I can enjoy it with you and only you for a little while.

She consented but decided one more lie wouldn't matter. Tense life at the mansion was like living in a house of cards. One wrong move, even a slight of breath, would make it crumble down. With all of the wrong she did to H.W. behind his back, the thought of not telling Daniel that she'd accepted a marriage proposal from his son was unthinkable. It would be a delicate situation and she wondered how she should mention it to him, let alone discuss it with him.

Once taken the vows of marriage she would honour them willingly. His words from their last night together reminded her of how competitive and controlling Daniel was by nature and if that excited her before it frightened her now. His legendary temper waited to detonate beneath his collected exterior and it was to be certain when it came to this topic. The almighty Daniel Plainview who never lost anything he went after was about to lose his lover to his son.

At dinner she waited untill H.W.'s attention was sidetracked and quietly informed Daniel that she wanted to see him in her bedroom later. He stared at her at length then slightly nodded, his gaze undeterred when H.W. was no longer distracted. She spent time with her secret fiancé in the library, hearing Daniel enter his office to do more work rather than to relax. Obsessed with work, it was all Daniel had now that H.W. was an adult, Eli was moved away and he was monarch of all he surveyed. She nearly fell asleep in H.W.'s arms on the sofa as he silently read a book of poetry. This relieved her when she saw the book's title; she didn't want him to follow in his father's footsteps by immersing himself in constant work. Telling him that she was going to bed, she issued a tender kiss on his lips then left him alone for the night.

Once in her room she locked the door to secure her privacy untill her lover arrived then dressed into her night clothes rather than stripping naked to wait for him as she usually did. Within minutes she fell asleep, wakened at nine by the jangle of the skeleton key at the lock. Heart pounding like a bass drum, she sat up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed, waiting for the door to crack then creak open and Daniel to slip in.

"You look like an angel in that white gown," he told her as he approached the bed.

"I've said something similar about you," she reminded softly.

Offering her a smile, his eyes dropped to her legs, concealed by the gown she wore. He reached down and stroked her inner thigh which she now instinctively opened to him. Groaning, she granted him access to her as she bunched up her nightgown and leant back to remove her underwear. He knelt down on the hard floor like he did the day of his effacing inauguration into the church, only this time it was for a far more pleasing experience than to be smacked around by Eli. She propped herself up on her elbows so she could watch but the moment his tongue touched her delicate flesh she released a high pitched squeal of delight and flopped down backwards again. Her fingers tangled in and pulled at his hair, as she swore and moaned his name.

From out of the blue, a guilt-ridden image of H.W. popped into her head: his sweet and darling face moving in for a kiss that started off as an innocent peck but built up to one more fervent and desirous. But in this fantasy he could speak and the words he spoke haunted her: I love you!

Snapping back to her senses she realised it wasn't H.W. between her legs but Daniel. As readily as her mind had betrayed her body with the picture of H.W., her body betrayed her mind with an orgasm that crippled her as she wiggled away from his mouth. Hooking her knees with his elbows, he grabbed hold of her hips and yanked her back down to the edge of the bed and onto his ravenous mouth again. Out of breath, her blurred thoughts were limpid enough for her to place her feet upon his shoulders and force him away. Sitting up, she arranged the bottom of her rumpled nightgown around her to cover her legs once more.

For a long time they stared at each other in separate disbelief for what she'd done, not uttering a single word. With a painfull grunt he rose up enough to sit on the edge of the bed with her and watched her heaving bosom calm and body cease quaking. The plateau they'd reached was one she helplessly dangled over now and the only person who prevented her from plummeting to her death was about to release her hand and let her go.

How was she going to break this news to him? Delicately? Daniel himself never made it a point to be subtle in his plain speaking ways. Directness would be honourable to the businessman and that was how she thought it best to handle.

I love him and I cannot bear it! she hopelessly admitted to herself.

"H.W. asked me to marry him," she stated abruptly, sparing him nothing even though she loved him. "I said yes."

The silence that befell them was deafening and hallow. He didn't ignite into a fit of violence or a litany of threats as she expected. He was immobile, as if concentrating on where was best to lay the killing strike on his prey. It worried her. Then he began to make sounds as if trying to form speech but gave up, sighed long and mournfully, ripping her heart asunder. After a long while she decided to speak up as it didn't seem that he was going to.

"He means a great deal to me but I love you more than anything in the world. That hasn't changed. I look forward to our nights together; I enjoy and savour every second of them and count the hours when you will come in here and be with me again, pleasuring me as a lover and holding me as a father. Words cannot express how profoundly I love you."

"H.W. is a good man," he said simply. "He is worthy of your love, your full, undivided love. You chose well."

"I told you, Daniel, to say the word and I'll leave him for you."

The idea occurred to her that after her assertion of future marriage this was probably the last chance she would have to do anything with him. All thoughts of H.W. were tossed aside in this new urgency of wanting his love and intending to take it before she was unable. He was a stoic statue as she caressed his body, lean and hard from a life of strenuous labour, and slipped one button free from its hole in his shirt, then another and another untill enough of his chest was exposed for her to plant tender kisses on. The coarse hair on his chest tickled her nose and she rubbed it gingerly to quell the agitation before suckling one of his nipples. This finally won her a reaction as he released a gratifying moan, inspiring her to continue more arduously.

"Feels good, doesn't it?" she asked. "I know that our nights are all about me. But not tonight. Tonight it's about you. Let me pleasure you. You deserve it."

He did not, or could not, reply. She continued her work, unbuttoned the rest of his shirt and attempted to pull it from his torso untill he prevented her. Undaunted, she strayed from his chest to his mouth; coaxing him into a heated kiss that was restrained on his end.

"Don't deny what you feel," she muttered in his ear. "I know you love me. I see it when you look at me. The way you touch me, the way you speak to me, guard me as your own. You love me as a daughter and you always have. Yet time has given us this deeper bond and because I'm not your daughter you love me as a woman. I know you want me as I want you. Just give in."

Relinquishing his steely nature for a brief moment, he kissed her without persuasion. She delighted in how well he kissed albeit an awkward one as if he was suddenly inexperienced. How experienced was he? Had it not been for H.W., Mary would've sworn that Daniel was a virgin. During the eleven long years she'd known him she could not recall a time when she saw him with a woman. There was Eli's old accusation of Daniel's fornication and womanising during the demeaning baptism many years ago but the only proof of it came from the words of one of the town harlots and Mary doubted her credibility. She refused to suspect the integrity of the man she idolised as a father figure.

Yet the absence of women in his life was bizarre; Daniel was exceptionally attractive, cunning and uncompromisingly successfull, a perfect mate for any of the women of Little Boston who wanted to escape their dreary town and impoverished lives. It was illogical that he'd never settled with one of them or ever bothered to do so little as court. Maybe he'd wanted her all along, waiting years for her to ripen into the woman he desired but could never find in anyone else. He didn't try to find his perfect mate, he created one in her, a Victor Frankenstein building his monster…then was robbed of her by his own son. Amid these rampant considerations he suddenly separated from her and she complained.

"It won't work, my sweet Mary," he murmured to her.

Not comprehending his meaning, she smiled and insisted, "Why? Because you're so much older than I am? Because we have a father/daughter relationship? Because I hero worship you? None of that mattered before, why does it now? I know I'm your weakness, Daniel Plainview. Don't deny yourself. Make love to me."

She kissed him again, opening his mouth with her tongue. Taking his hand into hers, she moved his palm down her body to the precious area between her legs beneath her nightgown, back to where he had his head only moments ago. Her hand guided his to caress her there in a satisfying way that made her throw her head back with closed eyes and moan. The atmosphere was charged with such sexual tension that it may as well had been electricity crackling through the air. He accepted her passion for a second or two before he refrained again.

"No, Mary," he persisted, taking her hand in his and pressing it to his dormant groin. "It won't work."

Staggered by this revelation she stopped. There was absolutely no life in his organ. Everything became clear to her at that moment. Their love was unconsummated not because he wanted to preserve her virginal integrity for H.W. or anyone else, it was because he wasn't capable of arousal. It amazed Mary that the selfless acts of performing oral sex on her were equally selfish. Oral sex was his only means of sex and if he could've he would've taken her maidenhead as she'd begged him to so often. In his efforts he was making her his lover the only way he was able to and it warmed her heart. But another curious thing came to her mind and with a lump in her throat she posed it to him.

"How is that possible?" she wondered aloud. "That can't be right. H.W…."

"Is not my son. His real father was killed in an accident when he was a baby. I've always wanted to have children but my father saw to it that I had my own accident when I was a boy." In sympathy and a surge of love, Mary squeezed his arm. "So you see, my sweet Mary, you are right to believe that I have more than fatherly love for you. If I didn't have that love for you I would've never come in here to satisfy you as best as I could or to admit the thing that shames me most. Love is sacrifice, even a hardened man like me can't argue against that. You are a fine and beautifull young woman. You should have everything you deserve. Don't waste your time here with me because I'm unable to give it to you. You and H.W. have my blessing."

"But I have everything I deserve! I have you! I want you! You still make me happy! That doesn't matter to me!"

With her final sentence she gestured toward his uncooperative body part. He exhaled with force and she smelt the customary whiskey on his breath yet was accustomed enough to it that it no longer bothered her. What bothered her was that he'd drink the toxic crap before coming into her room tonight when he had not on previous nights.

"I think it would be smart if you forgot about me," he told her. "It doesn't matter how I feel about you. I'm not good for you in any way, Mary. And as much as you insist my impotence doesn't matter to you in time it will. You can make your life with H.W. He's a good boy. He's ambitious and can take good care of you. He can make you happy. He can satisfy you and give you lots of children."

"No. You showed me a world where there is more to life than an unforgiving God, a hypocrite preacher and goats, a world where a woman has the right to be more than a housewife and a baby machine. Paul opened my eyes to that and you brought me into it. I always considered it to be a utopia, something that wasn't possible but nice to hope for. Until you."

"H.W. will not allow you to become a mere housewife and baby machine, I can assure you of that. I raised him a better specimen of man than that and he sees how incredible you are. If he didn't see the ambition you have then he wouldn't have asked you to marry him."

Mary could not believe what she was hearing as tears swelled her bright eyes.

"Daniel, I wouldn't be wasted on you!" Mary plead her case. "I wouldn't…

Filled with compassion for the young woman, he drew her closer to him, urging her gently into his arms as she wept without shame. Cradling her with the tenderness of a father, he did his best to offer her consolation however minute it appeared.

"Don't spoil the one selfless thing I'm trying to accomplish here, Mary," he murmured in her ear. "Don't make this harder than necessary. You will be fine. I know you will because I taught you to rise above adversity. You love H.W. too, I know you do. He is better suited for you. You know that as well as I do. In your heart, you know that."

"Yes, I do love him but…"

"But what, Mary? What good would I be to you? Take our H.W. and be happy that you have some resemblance of me. He isn't from my mold but I've shaped him…"

Her tenacity would not cave as she clung to him; she was sacrificing one precious thing for another and it was unacceptable, intolerable. She had intended to be loyal to her future husband yet now her decision to forgo Daniel entirely was too much. With him now, in his arms and in the place where he made love to her she learnt that letting the older man go was not as easy as she expected. It didn't matter if going back on her word made her a bad person as long as she could have them both. The Plainviews taught her long ago to not care about the opinions of others.

"He could never be a substitute for you!"

"H.W. is his own man, a worthy man. Take him and honour him without regret."

All the things that she found fault in her activities with him vanished as she stretched up and kissed him frantically, not minding the prick of his bristly moustache as she once did or the fears of his jealousies or driven nature, or the sworn oath she agreed to make with H.W. and the fantasies of his son uttering words he could only say inside those fantasies. She and Daniel were the only two people in the world and she wanted to give him everything she had, to make her affection concrete. Returning her ardent kisses with ones of his own, he grabbed her by the wrists and pinned her down on the bed, hovering above her.

"Enough, Mary, enough," he demanded. "We can no longer do this."

"When it comes to things I want you never taught me when to quit."

"But you must, Mary. You must. Listen. Do you know why I stopped coming here to see you for the last few nights?" He waited for her to ask him. "Because I knew that H.W. was planning to propose marriage to you before he did. I overheard George translating for him to Fletcher when they were in the library one night. You had already gone to bed and I suppose even though they knew I was in my office they thought I was unconscious in a drunken stupor. But they were unaware that on the nights I came to see you not a drop of whiskey ever touched my lips. Those nights I had other tastes I preferred to have on my tongue. Can you believe it? Our wickedness is what allowed me to find out and H.W. told Fletcher before he told me, his own father. He hasn't told me yet, he doesn't know that I know. What does that say about our relationship? He doesn't trust me. He didn't want to tell me because of my temper. And because he suspected that I wanted you for myself."

"What?" The allegation was news to Mary, as she never got the impression that H.W. had any hunch of the secret love affair. "He's never mentioned it to me."

"I raised him well, my sweet Mary. He isn't stupid. He knows me better than anyone else, like an extension of his own body. He knows that I am attracted to you, that I want to have you for myself. That's why he asked you to marry him. To take you away from me."

"No, he wouldn't do that, Daniel. He loves you."

"He loves me but I can't lie to him. He sees me for what I am. You don't and that's the danger of keeping you near me. He's trying to protect you."

"You would never hurt me. I know you wouldn't."

"It isn't me he's trying to save you from. It's from yourself. You are blind to my bad habits, you love me unconditionally. It would only bring you misery. That's how I know H.W. loves you more than even you know."

Mary couldn't speak but tears streaked her face and her lips quivered as emotion overwrought her. Leaning down, he gave her a long, languished kiss that worked relaxing magic on her. When he broke from her, his eyes were filled with loving remorse.

"This is where we say good-bye, my sweet Mary."

"No. No, one more night in your arms."

"Mary…"

"Please."

There was a prolonged deliberation before he nodded. She moved over to give him room and he positioned himself on his back next to her. Sliding over, she snuggled against him with her ear over his soothing, steady heart.

"I'm in love with you," she whispered in his ear. "I don't want to give you up."

"I know, my sweet."

He fell asleep before she did, as she expected him to, since her thoughts of how she was going to live without him kept her awake for most of the night. When her eyes opened in the morning he was not with her. At some time in the night he'd abandoned her, which weighed heavy on her heart.

In the days that followed Daniel immersed himself so deep in his work it was as if he was trying to recapture his youthfull ventures into business. He no longer took time to socialise and sequestered himself away in his office where he resumed the drinking he'd given up for her. She'd been his security blanket, a new means to unburden himself without the detriment of alcohol and now that he was stripped of her he fell back to intoxication. He became indifferent to H.W. and Mary watched with increasing disturbance how their father/son relationship decomposed significantly before her very eyes.

Usually he hid away and drank in his office choked with the smoke from tobacco and the stink of whiskey but on occasion preferred to pollute the fresh air of another room. Except for the night he became completely unhinged. As she and H.W. sat in the library after supper Mary was distressed at a scuffle that drew her attention to the door. Daniel plodded into the room with a large half empty bottle of something that resembled water but she suspected wasn't in his hand. Taking a seat across from the sofa that she and H.W. were in, his invidious glowering at his son when he looked up from the book he was reading very unsettling. H.W. offered a worried smiled before returning to his reading.

"You dumb little bastard," the elder man growled at his unresponsive son. "You think you're so smart but you don't know what I know. Try to take her away from me without the decency of even telling me."

"Daniel!" Mary addressed sternly. "Please! Don't do this! You're drunk and you don't know what you're saying!"

"He still hasn't mentioned his proposal to me. He adds insult to injury. He steals you away from me and doesn't bother telling me." Raising his voice, his eyes strayed from hers to H.W.'s face again and said, "I eat your fiancé's cunt every night and you can't even hear her cries of pleasure."

"Daniel!"

"Do you hear that, boy? Mary has the sweetest cunt I've ever tasted."

Mary was so mortified that she rose from her seat, which drew H.W.'s eyes from the book as she slapped the inexorable Daniel hard across the face. H.W. was after her, prying her shaking form away from his father but Daniel was also up and, like a wounded feral animal, grabbed a bewildered H.W. by the throat and slammed him against the wall.

"Daniel! Daniel, please stop! Let him go!" Mary begged.

Her fingers were at Daniel's hands, trying to tear them off of H.W. who struggled to breathe. The vagary attack was over as quickly as it began and a tinge of sober awareness returned to the inconsolable prospector. Releasing H.W., he flopped back into the chair, refusing to look in their direction. Mary had never seen him more lost but her priority was H.W.'s welfare. She tended to him, making sure he was able to breathe and uninjured. Slapping H.W.'s hands from his throat, she saw with agonising dismay the red marks where Daniel's fingers had been.

She led H.W. from the library and into her room where they stayed barricaded that night. They slept for a few hours but were awake again before dawn broke. Packing a few necessities and changes of clothes, they made their escape from the mansion without so much as a handwritten note.

With an abundance of possibilities, a promising future before them and a controlled past of dissonance behind them, they drove south. They got as far as they could in one day then stopped at a small local small town church to ask the preacher to marry them, not willing to remain unwed one more night out of fear that should Daniel reach them he could do more damage to force them apart. It was a modest wedding for a oil heir with only the preacher and his wife as a witness, simple enough for a young man who'd come from humble beginnings despite the grandiose life he'd progressively become accustomed to. He had Mary and that was enough for him.

Later that night in the town's best hotel room, far from extravagant but charming nevertheless, Mary forfeited to H.W. the one thing Daniel could never own: her virginity. It was awkward and hurt at first but H.W. was as tender and gentle as she trusted he would be. It was perfect, except for one thing. To her blameworthy horror when she climaxed it was Daniel's name she called into her new husband's deaf ear. In the night's late hour as H.W. slept, Mary toyed with the ring on her finger and wept as she remembered her fey love with Daniel. Her ridiculous heart continued to tell her that he was the one who got away.