Hate, Envy, Loss, Love Chapter 13: Celebrations and Confessions Part 2, a falling skies fanfic

Hey there viewers!:D We're having a Season 2 marathon at the moment:3 It's exciting;D Except we're watching Compass right now and I'm already tearing up D; Uggghhh. But anyways, NEXT CHAPTER STARTS SEASON 2:DDDDDDDDDD I hope you enjoyyyyyy:3 -Parker

HEEYYYY GUUUYYYYS! How are you? I hope you enjoy the chapther! The song Alyssa sings its the song Photograpgh by Nickelback. I took out to parts and changed a few words but yeah thats it! Anyway i am really hyper right now and very energetic! MWAHAHAHAHA! FEER THE ENERGYOF ALYSS CARTER!(espically when i have drank a whole lot of juice boxes!) So yeah i am going to stop talking now(or typing) and let you read! -Carter

Chapter 13-Celebrations and Confessions Part 2

Kaylee's POV

November came and went, and soon enough the 2nd Mass was well into December. I kept forgetting that my birthday was coming up in a few days, but I didn't really care. My birthday wasn't something I wanted people to make a big deal about. All I was going to be was another year older. Nothing special. Alyssa was way too excited about it, probably because she knew that it annoyed me when people made a big deal of my birthday and she liked to irritate me, and kept on talking about it to me. Honestly my friends were more excited about it than I was.

Ben and Jimmy kept asking me what I wanted and I told them I didn't want anything. I had an amazing group of friends and the entire 2nd Mass; what more could I ask for? I think the only thing I wanted personally was to be proud of myself and do something that contradicted the nightmare I had four weeks ago. That also happened to be the only time I slept in the past four weeks. Was I dying of debilitation? Absolutely. But I would do anything it took to stay awake. I was on the verge of passing out, frankly I have no clue how I've gone this long without it and haven't died or anything, and Ben and Jimmy seemed to notice, like always.

So to make them calm down, I went into Alyssa and I's tent and stayed in there the whole night every night. All I did was thought or make guns or write songs while I waited for the sun to come back up. I knew I'd be pissed at myself for not sleeping and wrecking my body soon, but I didn't care now. Things had gotten to the point where I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or if it was reality. That was enough to start making me feel like I was insane.

Ben's birthday passed, and Jimmy and I got to go on a late scouting with him so we could all hang out together for the last bit of his birthday. I didn't know what to get him, but when I asked he told me that all he wanted was for me to sing him another song. I asked him what his favorite song was and Ben just gave me a look and said to surprise him. I sung him 'Vienna' by Billy Joel and he freaked out. I genuinely wondered how my voice could be enjoyed so much by just one person; it shocked me actually. Why did Ben like it so much?

"Kaylee," Jimmy clapped his hands in front of my face.

I blinked a few times and focused on the world in front of me. I have a really hard time doing that sometimes. "What?"

"You almost fell asleep," Ben said giving me a 'what's up with you?' look.

"Sorry, guys," I rubbed my eyes with my fingertips to try and wake myself up. I seriously think that I'm going to pass out soon.

"Sleeping still hard?" Jimmy asked. I told him about the nightmares a couple days after Alyssa's birthday since he knew that something was up with me that I wasn't telling him about.

"Impossible," I moaned and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Are they any thing like Alyssa's?" Ben asked me, trying to get to the bottom of this whole catastrophe.

I picked up a stick off the ground we were all sitting on to scout the perimeter of camp. My fingers grabbed one of my knives and I started peeling the wood to occupy myself from falling asleep. "Meaning?"

"Like level of scariness."

"Hers are fucking Barney and Friends compared to what's been going on inside of my head."

Jimmy frowned. "Can you describe it to us?"

I shook my head. "It's just…" There I went again, trailing off in the middle of my sentence because I can't explain the nightmares.

"Too difficult to explain?" Ben finished.

"Exactly."

Jimmy stared at my eyes like Ben did occasionally. They were becoming so much alike, I was probably going to call one of them by the wrong name in the future. "Have you looked at your eyes lately, Parker?"

"Is it worse?" I stripped another piece of wood off the little branch. I didn't even have to take a guess at what Jimmy was talking about; I knew the dark circles were blacker than all of the black clothes I owned combined, and he was really concerned.

He gingerly touched below my left eye. "They're not gonna go away all that easily."

"Fantastic," I said sarcastically.

"On the bright side, your birthday's tomorrow," Ben smiled. Just like his father, Ben was always the optimist.

"Is it already the 19th?" I asked surprised. Three days had gone by and I didn't even notice. Shit, that's really bad.

"That's it," Ben let his handgun I made him drop out of his hand and onto the ground, "we're going to force you to sleep, even if we have to just sit there and wait for you to."

"Why?"

"If you can't even remember that your birthday is tomorrow, than you're more sleep deprived than we thought," Ben stared me down.

"First thing, my birthday is not something to get worked up about. It's just the day that I was born on and nothing more. And for someone who's not excited about it like everyone else seems to be, it's not in the front of my mind right now," I protested to Ben's idea of me being over the top exhausted.

"How are you not excited for your birthday?!" Jimmy exclaimed.

I shrugged. "I don't know, I'm just not. I don't want any gifts or anything special; I just want it to be a regular day where the three of us just go on patrols all the time like we do everyday."

Jimmy and Ben shook their heads at the same time. "You're gonna get something special," Jimmy stated.

I rolled my eyes. "Can we not talk about this until tomorrow? Please."

"Fine, we'll give you a break," Ben chuckled.

The 2nd Mass had gradually moved from the outskirts of the outskirts of Fitchburg and was now making our way down into Connecticut. The state was just as deserted as Massachusetts was, but in a more peaceful way you could say. A lot of the nature around Connecticut was still there and undamaged. But there was a structure over what I assumed to be Hartford and it creeped me out because you could see the structure over Boston faded in the background.

I had done a lot of thinking these past nights, and I've been thinking about how if something were to happen to either me, Ben, or Jimmy, we wouldn't have anything of each others or a picture to remember them by. And there was no way in hell I'd let myself forget either of them. "Guys, what if something happens to one of us? Like what would we have to remember each other by?"

That got the two boys to thinking. "I haven't even thought about that…" Jimmy said thoughtfully.

"We won't have anything of each others," Ben frowned a little.

I looked down at my folded hands and continued thinking about what we could do. What was something that we could do? My eyes flashed up a bit and that's when I looked at Jimmy's gloved hands, and then at Ben's. "What if," I tore the Velcro strap off my glove to take out my blackened hand, "we traded one glove with each other? That way we've always got something of each other's and that way when we're fighting, we can be reminded of what we're fighting for."

"And you call me the sap," Ben rolled his eyes.

"Shut up, Mason," I slipped off the other glove and traded one with Jimmy and Ben. I slid both of them on, and yeah it looked really tacky with mismatching gloves, but it made me feel better about all of this. Now I had something of Ben and Jimmy's to keep with me if they were to run into trouble.

"I'm just saying now, if either of you do get into trouble and don't make it back, I will be so pissed off because these were my uncle's gloves and if I don't end up getting them back, I'll have to bring you from the dead and kill you again." Ben and Jimmy started laughing at me, but they knew I was dead fucking serious.

The night carried on peacefully, to the point where I was literally falling asleep because it was so calm right now. I was on somebody's shoulder, but I couldn't even remember who I had crashed on. Whoever it was, they had their arm around me tightly and were super warm at the moment. I felt super safe with Ben and Jimmy, but I felt even safer now asleep on whoever's shoulder I was drifting off on.

Ben's POV

"Dude I think she's asleep," I said to Jimmy.

"Yeah she's out," Jimmy looked at Kaylee who was sleeping on my shoulder.

I put my hand on her shoulder and shook it lightly. "Kaylee, you gotta get up," I spoke softly.

Jimmy and I laughed quietly when she didn't do anything at all, but just shift slightly on my shoulder. My arm was around her to try and warm her up a little since she was freezing like she always was. Kaylee was always on her guard when she was awake and never let anyone even try to guess what she was thinking. She looked so much different while she slept. She wasn't blocking out anything or trying to keep her walls up; she was just being the easy-going Kaylee Parker that she once was before. I really wished that I could've met that girl that used to be full of life and happiness, like she described to me.

"I'll carry her back to her tent," Jimmy said and began standing up.

"No, I'll do it," I replied. I noticed through my improved sight that Jimmy tensed just the slightest. Kaylee was a touchy subject for him and he was extremely protective over her. At certain times, I thought he knew that I liked her too, but other times I think he was just as clueless as Kaylee was. "Camp is five miles away. You're going to get tired, believe me it's not easy carrying someone long distances without stopping. It'll be easier this way, trust me."

He nodded. "Alright. She would've wanted me to carry her gun anyways." We laughed and Jimmy slung Kaylee's Calico gun over his shoulder while I lifted Kaylee's head off my shoulder and picked her up into my arms. She weighed a whole lot lighter than I thought she would be since girls her height are usually a little heavier than Kaylee was because of the longer bones and muscles in her legs. Looks like Jimmy and I have our next task to take care of.

She leaned her head onto my chest, one hand resting by her head and the other resting on the other arm. Jimmy kept looking over at me and Kaylee in my arms and I couldn't process what could be going through his head. He couldn't be jealous because he knew that Kaylee liked him and he couldn't be upset that I told him I would take her the five miles back. I had no idea what it could be. Kaylee looked completely adorable and beautiful at the moment, something I was clueless as to how she achieved. She was practically nestled into my chest, which was insanely cute, and she was just…beautiful. Her hair was gorgeous, her height was incredible, her eyes were like two blue topazes and diamonds mixed together, and her smile was perfectly straight. But what I thought made her absolutely stunning was her beautiful heart. When she laughed or smiled, it was 100 percent contagious and you couldn't help but smile or laugh along with her. And the way she talked about music made you hope that one day you too could be as passionate about something as she was. Even though it could be difficult sometimes, she never needed anyone to look out for her or needed someone to be her foundation. She was her own foundation and she isn't like any of the heroines in any stories or movies you've ever seen before because she isn't needy and dependent like they all are. She could stand on her own two feet without help getting there and she didn't need anybody to keep her going on.

"What the hell?"

Alyssa's POV

"So what did you get Kaylee for her birthday?" I looked up at Hal. "I hope it's better than my gift. That was possibly the worst attempt at regifting I have ever seen." I laughed.

He laughed too "In my defense, I got you a better gun later."

"Okay, I'll give you that much. You did get me a pretty nice gun." I looked down at it. It was solid black 9mm hand gun. Like the one you see in spy movies, the really cool looking ones.

Hal pointed to some people heading toward camp in the opposite direction. "Who is that?" I looked over at the people. It was two boys, caring someone. "It's Ben and Jimmy."

"And they're carrying Kaylee." The two of us ran over. "What the hell?"

"She's just asleep." Jimmy said. He rolled his eyes. Why is he so grumpy?

"We were on guard. I was talking to her, and when she wasn't responding, I realized she had fallen asleep. I'm carrying her since it was a five mile walk." Jimmy clenched his fist. Now I get it, Jimmy is mad because Ben is caring her, and he is jealous. I smiled a little.

"You two are lucky she isn't hurt; if she was, you two would have been so dead."

"Why am I not surprised?" Ben laughed as we headed back to camp.

"So its Kaylee's birthday tomorrow and I was thinking-"

"She doesn't want anyone to make a big deal out of it," Jimmy cut me off.

"I know. But I still am going to," I smiled. "We are gonna go wake her up and I, me and me only, am going on a scouting mission with her. I haven't got to hang out with her in forever. Then Jimmy and Ben, you can have her. But I get to hang out with her first."

"She said she wants it to be like a regular day, going on missions with me and Ben." Jimmy protested.

"She probably did say that, but I'm not going to listen to her."

"I agree with Alyssa, she should be able to hang out with Kaylee," Ben said. Jimmy glared at him, and Ben glared back.

"Easy boys, save the fighting for another time." I smiled and stepped between them. By now we were back at camp. Jimmy went straight over to his tent and Ben laid Kaylee down in our tent. "You liked that," I teased Ben.

He turned bright red. "Shut up Alyssa," he smiled.

"See you tomorrow", I waved, then I walked over and hugged Hal. "Night."

"Night." Then they left and headed back to their tent.

I went into our tent and quietly started looking through my bag, until I found what I was looking for. It was an old picture of Kaylee, her mom, my mom, and I. We were at the mall, shopping for new school clothes and both of us are smiling so big. We loved it when the four of us went out and did stuff. Kaylee had on grey jeans and a grey shirt with stripes and grey vans. I had on blue shorts and a pink shirt and white vans. We both looked so happy that day. Then I found the next picture, it was from the same day. It was from one of those photo booths. There were four pictures; one of all four of us, one of just Kaylee and her mom, one of my mom and I and one of just me and Kaylee. In the one of Kaylee and me, we had in matching blue flower head bands. My mom loved them and insisted on buying them for us. So just to make her happy, we wore them. This picture was taken three hours before my mom died. It was the last time we were ever truly happy. The two of us had never experienced anything bad then; we were innocent kids. Kaylee didn't know I had this. I found it the day we went to the 2nd Mass and I put it in my bag. A couple days ago I found a craft store that had picture frames, so I took one that would fit these two pictures. I wrapped it in black paper, courtesy of the craft store. I put the present safely back in my bag. Next I took out my mom's and Kaylee's moms old friendship necklaces. They were lockets in the shape of a heart, one was black one was blue. I took them apart at the hinges, and switched them around. So the front of my mom's had the back of Kaylee's moms and vice versa. I put them back on their chains and wrapped one in paper. After I finished Kaylee's gift, I fell asleep.

That morning I woke up around 9:30. I looked over at Kaylee and found her still fast asleep. I got up, and went and had breakfast.

"So are we gonna go wake up Kaylee?" Matt asked.

"Yup," I smiled. "I have a plan."

"Should we be scared?" Hal asked.

"No."
"Should Kaylee be scared," Ben asked.

"Yes."

"Now the big one. Should you be scared when Kaylee wakes up?"

I had to think about that one. "Probably." They all laughed and we finished up breakfast. "Hey Jimmy come with us to wake up Kaylee," I said. "Matt I want you to go get everyone ready to sing happy birthday when she comes out, like you did on my birthday."

"But I want to be there when she wakes up!"

"And I wish you could but there's going to be a lot of adult language that you really don't need to hear, so go get everyone ready." Everyone laughed and Matt ran around getting everyone ready. We snuck into our tent really quietly and I snuck right up next to Kaylee.

"She's gonna kill you," Jimmy shook his head smiling. I ignored him.

"KAYLEE GET UP! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!" I screamed and jumped on top of her.

"No." she said with her eyes still closed.

"GET UP!" Everyone all followed my lead and started trying to get Kaylee up, by shaking her.

"Alyssa if you don't fucking get out of here right now I will kill you and make it look like an accident. And you know I can, I've done it before," she said with closed eyes. Everyone else took a step back.

"Kaylee, we have guests."

"If you guys don't get out of here in the next five seconds I will rip your dicks off and strangle you with them in your sleep," Kaylee said sternly. Someone wasn't a happy camper today.

"Ben, help me," I motioned for him to come over. "Grab her." He picked her up and we all walked outside where Ben put her down, she glared at him.

"Now!" Matt said and everyone sang the happy birthday song to Kaylee. She tried to leave but Hal, Ben, and I blocked her. She stood there in her pajamas, glaring at us.

"All I wanted was to sleep in on my birthday. Was that so fucking much to ask?" She shook her head and went into our tent.

"I think it went well," Hal said.

"Are you serious?" Jimmy asked. Still pissed about last night.

"Yeah, no one died right?" I smiled.

Kaylee walked out of the tent in her jeans and sneakers. "Yet."

We all headed into the tent. Kaylee was talking to Dr. Glass.

"So remember the plan, Jimmy and Ben bring her to us later tonight. Do not forget and don't let her bail. Or else."

"Yes ma'am," Ben said. I smirked.

Kaylee's POV

I forgot what sleep felt like. And it was completely and utterly wonderful. I still have no idea how I fell asleep; my guess was that I just passed out because of exhaustion or because I felt safe with Ben and Jimmy. That night was peaceful, nightmareless. A full night of rest was absolutely amazing, until I woke up to Alyssa jumping on me and yelling.

"KAYLEE GET UP! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!"

Damn I forgot. "No." Maybe if I kept my eyes shut she'd go away since it's my birthday. But this is Alyssa I'm talking about.

"GET UP!" She shook me a bunch of times.

"Alyssa if you don't fucking get out of here right now I will kill you and make it look like an accident. And you know I can, I've done it before."

There was a quiet silence, and then Alyssa said, "Kaylee, we have guests."

You are fucking kidding me right now. "If you guys don't get out of here in the next five seconds I will rip your dicks off and strangle you with them in your sleep." I wasn't so much pissed at them for being her, but being woken up when they know I haven't been sleeping well. I didn't know if I would have another peaceful night to sleep, so I wanted to get as much rest as I could.

"Ben, help me. Grab her," Alyssa instructed. Oh, fuck.

Next thing I knew, I was being ripped out from under the sheets on my cot, carried outside, and set down in front of the whole 2nd Mass in my black flannel pajama pants and my black tank top. It was at least twenty degrees out side and I was freezing my ass off considering I had no shoes on and was in a tank top.

And they all started singing to me while I felt like throwing myself off a cliff in embarrassment. I turned to try and go back into the tent but Hal and Ben blocked my way and Alyssa stood there with a smug grin on her face that I almost slapped off had the 2nd Mass not been behind me.

After ten more seconds of being thoroughly mortified, they finished and I looked at Jimmy, Hal, Ben, and Alyssa. Words cannot describe the loathing despisement I felt towards them at this moment. "All I wanted was to sleep in on my birthday. Was that so fucking much to ask?" I shook my head and entered my bitch of a best friend and I's tent. I tugged on my jeans, slid into my black hoodie, and slipped into my sneakers. I quickly pulled a brush through my hair which I have neglected to comb in the past three days and put my IMI Galil SAR Carbine gun across my back and then exited the tent.

"Yeah, no one died, right?" Alyssa asked all cheery.

"Yet," I put in darkly. I kept on walking without them until I reached the food tent.

"Happy Birthday, Kaylee!" Dr. Glass smiled when I opened the mess tent to see her.

"Ugh, don't remind me," I shook my head at the thought of the singing thing again.

"How old are you today?" she asked.

"Fifteen," I said softly.

"That's hardly an age to worry about being old or anything," she teased me.

I smiled the smallest bit, "I'm not worried about being old. I just hate that everyone's making a big deal about it."

"It's something to celebrate though. You made it another year despite the fact aliens invaded the earth. That's something to celebrate."

I grabbed a granola bar and a bottle of water. "Yeah, but it doesn't matter to me. I just want to get through the day."

Dr. Glass shook her head at me now. "You should be proud, Kaylee."

Yeah, well I don't. "I know. Thanks anyways Dr. Glass."

I sat down at an empty table to eat alone. I was in one of those moods where you hate everybody for no reason and want to be left alone. I was usually like that, but being a fighter changed that for me. When I was drinking some water, I saw Ben, Hal, Alyssa, and Jimmy walking into the tent. They saw me sitting alone and sat down around the table, simply staring at me.

I looked around at every single one of them. "Give me one valid reason as to why I should not murder you all right here, right now."

"I'm your brother," Hal stated.

"Not really," I countered.

"You love me too much," Alyssa said.

"Do I?"

"I'm one of your best friends," Ben answered.

"Invalid."

"I like guns," Jimmy smiled stupidly.

I looked at him. "Nice try. Can we just agree to make this a normal day?"

"Nope," Alyssa grinned deviously.

"You are seriously asking for it," I told her. I got up to throw away my trash and to walk outside.

Alyssa followed me outside. "We have a patrol together in a few minutes."

I sighed. "If you piss me off further I will return to camp alone."

We kept walking down the road until we were out of camp and were entering a little forest area that served as our south post for scouts. Alyssa and I sent the scouts that were there back to camp and we sat down on the grass. I was quiet and she was quiet, but so much was going through our minds at the moment. I was thinking about all of the time we'd spent together and all the memories that were between the two of us.

Alyssa was too, and then she voiced our thoughts. "Man, time flies. I remember the day when you were born."

I frowned and smiled a little. "You were there?"

"Yeah! I don't remember much cause I was just one, but I do remember my mom putting you on my lap and me 'holding' you."

"I think that was the only time you were taller than me," I smirked.

"Shut up. Just because you're fifteen now doesn't mean you can be even more of a smart ass."

"Just following in your footsteps," I shrugged.

"I was not that bad!" she exclaimed.

"Yeah you were," I nodded.

"If you keep being a bitch to me I'm not going to give you your present."

"I don't want any presents."

"Well that is too damn bad. You're getting presents whether you fucking want them or not," she folded her arms.

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever."

"Fifteen-year-olds," Alyssa scoffed and reached into her right pocket.

"You were fifteen a month ago, so shut up." She rolled her eyes at me.

Alyssa pulled out something wrapped in black tissue paper and handed it to me. "This is the first one and I'll give you the other two later on." I took it from her hand and peeled off the tissue paper.

I practically dropped it when I saw what it was. "Is this…"

"Yeah," she smiled, "and I have the other one." She took out the other necklace to show me.

They were our moms' friendship necklaces when they were our age. They always promised to pass them down to us when we were both the same age as them, but they died before they got the chance. It was crazy that the two of them were both as close as Alyssa and I are. My mom's necklace was black and Alyssa's mom's was blue, which were our favorite colors. I always thought that my mom was wearing hers when she died, and Alyssa's mom too, but I guess I was wrong.

"I can't believe you've had these this whole time." I kept staring at it in disbelief. I picked up the locket and opened it. A picture of Alyssa's mom and my mom was still in there, when they were both sixteen. "Wow, your mom looked just like you."

"You have your mom's hair," Alyssa said. "But you have your dad's eyes."

"You look nothing like your dad," I laughed a little.

"Thank God for that," Alyssa shook her head and laughed too.

"This is amazing, Alyssa. Thanks." I took the neck lace and wrapped it a few times, then I put it on my wrist. Yeah, I know it's a necklace and shit, but I already had a necklace on that meant more to me than anything I owned. Alyssa put hers on her wrist too, and we bumped our arms.

"I still can't believe that little Kaylee Parker is fifteen now," she sighed.

"Dude, I'm not, nor have I ever been little." I hit five feet when I was ten years old, and two years later I was 5'8. Then I reached 5'10 when I was thirteen and at fourteen I grew another inch and have stayed at 5'11. I didn't really want to be any taller, since six feet for a girl was kind of weird. But you know, whatever works.

"I think we've established that," Alyssa said looking up at me. Even sitting down, she was short. When we were both standing up, she barely reached my shoulder. It was hilarious when she fought with me or with Hal because both of us were so much taller than her but she just kept fighting anyways. I still gave her crap about her height all the time though.

"I think we should establish the fact that Matt is almost taller than you."

"Fuck you and your height. You are this close to be slapped so damn hard on your birthday," Alyssa pinched her fingers together.

I put my hands up. "I'm done for the day."

Alyssa rolled her eyes. "You suck."

"I know." An hour of us talking and reminiscing about the old times passed, and the two of us headed back to camp. Alyssa said that Ben and Jimmy were waiting to go hang out with me later so I was going to go find them when I saw a mildly pissed off looking Jimmy walk by us without seeing me. "I'm gonna go see what's up with him," I told her and I jogged after Jimmy.

Alyssa's POV

"I still can't find Kaylee's gift," Hal said. I knew we had found her a guitar but he lost it. We walked back out to find Kaylee. She was sitting alone at a table so we all surrounded her. She looked up at us a second later.

"Give me one valid reason as to why I should not murder you all right here, right now." Hal, not understanding the concept 'rhetorical question' answered her.

"I'm your brother," Hal stated. Not going to work. I wonder what she would say to me?

"Not really."

"You love me too much," I smiled.

"Do I?"

"I'm one of your best friends," Ben answered.

"Invalid." Hahaha.

"I like guns," Jimmy smiled stupidly. Really? Is that the best he can come up with? If that's all it takes, why aren't Kaylee and Pope best friends?

"Nice try. Can we just agree to make this a normal day?"

"Nope," I smirked.

"You are seriously asking for it." She stood and I followed her.

"We have a patrol together in a few minutes."

"If you piss me off further I will return to camp alone." We walked over to the south post watch spot for scouts. It was a little grassy patch of land. We were both thinking. Since Kaylee isn't much for conversation, I had to start it.

"Man, time flies. I remember the day when you were born."

"You were there?"

"Yeah! I don't remember much cause I was just one, but I do remember my mom putting you on my lap and me 'holding' you." I held her for like two seconds before I almost dropped her and my mom took her back.

"I think that was the only time you were taller than me." Always a height joke.

"Shut up. Just because you're fifteen now doesn't mean you can be even more of a smart ass."

"Just following in your footsteps." Oh really now?

"I was not that bad!"

"Yeah you were." Okay, so maybe a little.

"If you keep being a bitch to me I'm not going to give you your present."

"I don't want any presents."

"Well that is too damn bad. You're getting presents whether you fucking want them or not," I crossed my arms.

"Whatever." Ha! I win!

"Fifteen-year-olds," I rolled my eyes.

"You were fifteen a month ago, so shut up."

I pulled out the locket. "This is the first one and I'll give you the other two later on."

"Is this…"

"Yeah, and I have the other one." I showed her.

"I can't believe you've had these this whole time." She looked inside. "Wow, your mom looked just like you."

"You have your mom's hair," I smiled. "But you have your dad's eyes."

"You look nothing like your dad."

"Thank God for that," I shook my head. I had my mom's height, look everything. I would hate to look like my dad.

"This is amazing, Alyssa. Thanks." She wrapped it a few times, and then put it on her wrist and I did the same.

"I still can't believe that little Kaylee Parker is fifteen now."

"Dude, I'm not, nor have I ever been little."

"I think we've established that,"

"I think we should establish the fact that Matt is almost taller than you." Wow. She would go there.

"Fuck you and your height. You are this close to be slapped so damn hard on your birthday," I help me fingers up less than an inch to emphasize my point.

She put her hands up. "I'm done for the day." Oh for the day?

"You suck."

"I know."

As we headed back to camp, Jimmy walked past us. Kaylee noticed something was up so she went over to him. I walked over to the Mason brothers and sat down.

"How did it go?" Hal asked.

"Good."

"Nice to see you're still alive, obviously you didn't piss her off that much," Ben said and they all laughed.

"Shut up," I smiled, knowing it was true.

"So where did she go?"

"She went off to go consol Jimmy." I made a face and they laughed. "He walked past us and looked all pissed off. They went that way." I pointed to where they went.

"Okay cool. I'm gonna go find them. I think we have scouting together."

"Of course you do," Hal said. Ben rolled his eyes and ran off to go find them. Hal noticed the necklace wrapped around my wrist. He grabbed my wrist and looked at it. "What's this?"

"Part of Kaylee birthday present."

"Why is the bottom black and the top blue?"

"It's two different lockets. Kaylee's is black on top and blue on the bottom. They were our mom's. My mom's was blue and her mom's was black."

"That's cool," Matt said. Just then Ben came walking back. He was gonna go straight to their tent but Hal stopped him.

"I thought you had scouting with Jimmy and Kaylee."

"They can do it just them two. They're perfectly fine without me." Oh God, what happened now?

"Kaylee likes Jimmy and Jimmy likes Kaylee and they're just gonna be one big happy fucking family."

"I'll be right back." I ran over to where Kaylee and Jimmy were sitting, talking.

"Hey Alyssa, where's Ben?" Jimmy asked.

"Not here, obviously. Weaver needs you Jimmy. So you should like go find him. I am supposed to take over for you"

"What?" He asked.

"Leave. Now." I glared at him. He stood up and jogged back.

"What do you want Alyssa?" Kaylee asked.

"Are you happy with yourself? Hurting Ben like that?"

"What?"

"Ben just heard your whole little talk with Jimmy and he is pissed. He really likes you."

"Yeah, usually when you're friends with someone you tend to like them a lot." "You honestly don't see it? How can you be so fucking blind?"

"Why the hell does everyone keep saying that?! Its starting to get real damn annoying."

"Maybe because it's true dumb ass. Try and consider how he feels sometimes."

"Hey, Alyssa! Weaver didn't need me." Jimmy came walking up. He didn't look too happy with me.

"I know. I just needed to talk to Kaylee." I looked back at Kaylee. "Just think about what I said." I stood up and walked back to camp. Wow Jimmy just manages to piss me off. I really don't know how. Just like the cheerleaders back in high school. They were so fucking peppy and happy it made me sick. Some of them were okay but most of them I hated. They just annoyed me for no reason. That's kinda how I feel about Jimmy. The only reason I tolerated him is because Kaylee's friends with him. But after learning what I did today, he wants to be more than just friends and that will not be tolerated. I walked over to Ben and Hal and Matt. "Wow. Kaylee is so fucking oblivious. She doesn't get it. Either that or she is in denial."

"Wait, you didn't tell her did you?" Ben asked.

"No I didn't say it, but I tried to hint and she didn't get it. She said you don't like her and you two are just good friends and she just doesn't get it."

"Oh you are forever friend zoned dude," Hal laughed. "But hey don't feel bad. I was in a worse place than friend zone and look at us now." We all started laughing and Ben even smiled.

"See it can still work," I said

"Hal! Carter! Come here!" Weaver yelled. Hal and I jogged over to Weaver's tent. It served as a place to work on battle plans and have meetings.

"What's up, Captain?" Hal asked.

"We're having a meeting and I want you two here. Hal, I'm real impressed how you have stepped up and helped out. Until your dad gets back, you're in a way taking his place. Alyssa, you and Hal will be a team with whatever two Berserkers I find for scouting. It's your team, Hal. Therefore I want you at all meetings from now on. Alyssa, you too."

"Yes sir," Hal said.

"You got it, Captain," I nodded. We followed Captain over to the tent. "So in a way, I'm your second in command?"

"Yeah pretty much," He said as we sat down in the tent.

"Okay. We have a new battle strategy: attack and run. We need to attack them, not let them attack us and fight them. If we don't attack them on our terms, they will run all over us. We can't let that happen so we start tomorrow. We have about an eight minute time period between attacking and retreating. We have no room for mistakes people, know that now. This is just until we receive new orders. Remember the big plan. Make it so it's just too much to live here. That the price of living is too much," Weaver said. "Any questions?" No one said anything. "Okay good. We won't have special groups anymore. It will be whoever I see first. I think we have all gotten to know each other well enough to do that. To not kill each other, we're better friends than that now." He looked at Hal and me.

"Yeah and some of us are more than friends," someone yelled. Now they were all staring at us.

"Don't try and hide it. We all see you two kissing." Someone else said, everyone laughed.

"Okay, okay, calm down," Weaver said, but he was laughing too. "We start this new plan tomorrow. Meeting dismissed."

"Okay, come on let's go!" I grabbed Hal's hand and started pulling him. "Come on, come on, let's go." We ran past their tent "Matt, let's go!" He ran out with his present for Kaylee, next I grabbed my gift from our tent then we walked up to the little grassy place Ben thought of for Kaylee's 'party'. Earlier in the week we had set up a few logs in a circle with a small fire pit inside. Hal started the fire as Matt and I sat down and waited. The plan was for Ben and Jimmy to bring Kaylee up here and surprise her.

Kaylee's POV

"What's up, Boland?"

"Nothing. What's up with you, birthday girl?" Something was off with him. He was mad but he was trying to cover it up.

I gave him a 'don't-say-that-again-or-I'll-hurt-you' look and then proceeded to ask him what his deal was. "Something's up. What's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it here."

"Then we'll go on a walk and talk about it. Come on," I motioned and started walking back outside of camp. He reluctantly went with me and we walked silently for at least five minutes. Jimmy was a pretty happy-go-lucky guy, so I was kind of concerned as to why he was pissed. While I waited for him to think of what to say, I thought about how complicated our relationship must've looked to others. We weren't in a relationship, we were best friends, but we both knew that we liked each other. Well, Jimmy knew I was figuring it out, but I knew that I actually did like him. If I didn't tell him soon enough, I was going to regret it. But I had no fucking clue how I was supposed to start. Guys generally weren't my area of expertise, unless it involved slugging them because they wouldn't leave you alone or gave you a ton of crap at school.

"I know it's stupid, like really stupid," Jimmy started off, "but I think that Ben likes you."

Was this seriously going to come up again? "Why do you think that?"

"No, I know Ben likes you. He wouldn't let me carry you back to camp last night and by the way he looks at you everyday I can tell he feels more than friendship towards you." So it was Ben who carried me back last night…

"Jimmy, you're being ridiculous. We were five miles away from camp last night and I know you would've gotten tired anyway. If I was in your shoes I would've had Ben carry me. Ben doesn't like me like that; we're just best friends."

"You seriously don't see it." Jimmy shook his head. "I don't like that Ben likes you, and I know that sounds like I'm being a total dramatic bitch but I can't help it. That's my problem."

I shook my head. "It doesn't matter. Even if Ben did like me, it wouldn't change the way I feel. I don't like him like that," I bit my lip trying to hold back the words that I couldn't just spit out. Damn it Kaylee, just fucking say it. I took a deep breath and looked away from Jimmy. "I like you, not Ben." Holy shit. I wasn't sure if I really was ready to admit that to him, but I couldn't take it back now.

Jimmy stared back at me, stunned and not sure how to reply to that.

"I've spent a shitload of time thinking about how I should tell you or if I should tell you and I guess it just came out."

What started out as a small smile spread into a huge grin across his face. "You figured it out?"

I nodded. "Took me awhile, but I did."

"And you had me worried that you were falling in love with our best friend."

"Love isn't my thing," I shook my head.

Jimmy rolled his eyes. "I know you don't want to be in a relationship, and honestly I don't either with where the 2nd Mass is at, so…"

"I say that we wait until we're in the clearing. If we make it out alive, we'll reconsider it."

He smiled. "Sounds good."

"Thanks for understanding," I thanked him and gave him a hug. He gave me one of his amazing embraces back, and for the second time today, I was happy on my birthday. I was with someone I loved being around and someone who could make me smile more than I ever have within a few seconds.

"You're so short," Jimmy laughed. Okay, fucking Jimmy and Ben have been growing like crazy the past months and it was pissing me off because they were giving me shit about being 'short' all the damn time.

"Just because you're an inch taller than me doesn't mean you can give me crap about being short."

Jimmy laughed. "Yeah it does."

"It's getting really annoying having you two gang up on me all the time."

"Bro Code."

I rolled my eyes. "You guys are also really stupid sometimes."

He grinned. "But you love us anyways."

"No not really."

Just then Alyssa stormed over to Jimmy and I. She looked really pissed and had that 'I'm-going-to-give-you-a-huge-ass-lecture" face on. What the hell did I do now?

"Hey Alyssa, where's Ben?" Jimmy asked in case she saw him. We were all going to hang out on another scouting together and I hadn't seen Ben around at all.

"Not here, obviously. Weaver needs you, Jimmy. So you should like go find him. I'm supposed to take over for you," Alyssa folded her arms. Yeah, bull shit.

"What?" Weaver knew that we were going to be out, so Jimmy was confused. And he was totally just about to catch Alyssa in her white ass lie.

"Leave. Now." Jimmy put his hands up and then jogged back to camp.

"What's your deal?" I frowned.

"Are you happy with yourself? Hurting Ben like that?" she questioned, pissed as hell.

"What?" What the hell was she fucking talking about?

"Ben just heard your whole little talk with Jimmy and he's pissed. He really likes you."

Why the fuck would he be mad? "Yeah, usually when you're friends with someone you tend to like them a lot."

"You honestly don't see it? How can you be so fucking blind?"

"Why the hell does everyone keep saying that?! It's starting to get real damn annoying," I stared at her with the hardest expression on my face. This was getting fucking old.

"Maybe because it's true, dumbass. Try and consider how he feels sometimes."

"Hey, Alyssa!" Jimmy called to her. "Weaver didn't need me." Jimmy gave her a questioning glance. I was trying to calm myself down before I went crazy thinking about what the hell she meant.

"I know. I just needed to talk to Kaylee," Alyssa said, then turned to me. "Just think about what I said." Believe me, I would. It was irritating the fuck out of me.

She left the two of us standing there and headed the few feet back to camp. I was confused as ever and slightly pissed. Why did people keep shoving that in my face?

"What was that about?" Jimmy raised an eyebrow.

"I have no fucking clue."

What the hell? How was that hurting Ben? Was Alyssa just saying that because she didn't like Jimmy and wanted me to feel bad? I had no idea what the hell I was supposed to believe or what the hell she was trying to imply, but it was annoying me.

"Don't let it ruin your birthday," Jimmy set his hand on my shoulder. "Just let it go for now."

I smiled gratefully at him and we walked back into camp to get Ben. Matt and Ben were standing there talking alone. Alyssa and Hal must've gone off somewhere. Even though I still felt pissed about what Alyssa said, I stayed smiling for Ben's sake.

"Ready?" I asked.

He nodded and smiled back. "Let's go."

My two best guy friends and I set out to our favorite patrol spot to hang out until the sky went dark. We sat right by a small creek and under the winter changed trees, quiet for a few minutes. My life a year ago was no where near as fantastic as it is now. I was going to keep moving on with whatever came at me, no matter how hard it was. That was a promise I was making today, even if it was the hardest thing I would have to do. I think that everything happens for a reason and that tough situations in life make you grow as a person and make you stronger. As hard as it is to admit, my parents' death made me a stronger person and helped me grow into who I am today.

But I still hadn't thought of a reason why they died. And I wonder about that everyday but have yet to discover a factor that benefited me in any way from losing two of the people I cared about the most in my life.

"You've got the weight of the world in your eyes," Jimmy stated looking at my eyes.

"What's on your mind, Parker?" Ben wondered.

I shook my head slightly. "Just thinking about how different my life is now."

"Better or worse?"

"Better," I nodded. "I mean, I have you guys now. I've never had any friends apart from Alyssa, and you two mean the world to me."

"Really?" Jimmy smiled. Ben's eyes lit up.

"Absolutely. You guys are the best friends I could ever have." I was speaking from the bottom of my heart and I don't think I loved anyone else more than I loved them. Alyssa, Hal, and Matt included in that.

"I can't believe Kaylee Parker is getting all soft on us," Ben said to Jimmy.

"You're one to talk," I smirked at Ben. He rolled his eyes but smiled.

"Before I forget, I want to give you your present," Jimmy said and stuck his hand in his pocket.

"I thought I told you guys I didn't want any presents."

"We didn't listen," Ben smirked. Asshole was stealing my move. "I'm giving you mine later."

"I take back what I said. I hate you both."

"You're going to like your presents though," Jimmy grinned and pulled whatever he had out of his pocket. He gave me what appeared to be a cardstock type square. I took the square and realized it was a card Jimmy made. I smiled up at him and then I looked back at the card.

"You can read it later, but there's something inside."

When I opened the card, a picture fell to the floor. "A picture?" I picked it up and my eyes went wide. How the hell did he get this?

About a week ago, the three of us were patrolling outside and had taken some cameras along. We did actually work hard and got some good pictures for Weaver, but when we took a break, we sat down and took at least ten pictures of us sitting down. We had a picture taking war and whoever got the best picture of someone else without the person noticing would get that person's dinner. The boys decided to gang up on me (of course) so they had gotten seventeen of me just sitting looking out at the scenery. They said they were taking pictures of the aircrafts and I knew that they weren't, but I was really tired and didn't feel like hurting them so I just let them do it. We deleted them afterword, but then we started taking pictures of all three of us in the same shot. We pulled stupid faces, serious faces, and Jimmy insisted we took dramatic shots. Ben and Jimmy were going to delete them all and go back to camp, but I told them that we should take an actual photo of us smiling. We took a few, until Ben made some stupid remark and we all started laughing really hard. Jimmy's finger accidentally took the picture and it was by far the best one we took. I said we shouldn't delete that and ask Weaver to print it for us, but we forgot on our way back to camp and I just remembered now as I look at the picture in front of me.

"How did you print this?"

"I snuck into Weaver's tent when he wasn't there and printed it," Jimmy grinned. "Ben and I have one too." Both of them held their pictures up and I smiled even wider.

"I love this photo," I said and looked at how happy all three of us were. This photo was something I appreciated a shitload because I wanted a picture of all us for the longest time so I would have a memory that I couldn't ever forget. More importantly, I would have a piece of Ben and Jimmy with me always.

I tucked the picture in the inside pocket in my hoodie along with Jimmy's card which I would read later. It took me forever to get my mind to wrap grasp the fact that I had a picture of them now. A picture for me, a picture for my memory, and a picture for the history book that we would be written in when we all survived the war.

"I think it's amazing that we caught you genuinely smiling on camera," Ben laughed and continued looking at the picture.

"Agreed," Jimmy nodded staring at his too.

"You guys live to annoy me, don't you?" It was more of a statement than a question.

"You know you love us," Jimmy looked over at me. "We're the best friends you can't live without."

Damn straight I couldn't. They were giving me motivation to fight; they were giving me hope. I needed that more than I needed the anger and hate to push me on. Their friendship was one of my greatest possessions, my mom's necklace that was around my neck being the other. I must've been fingering it again, because Jimmy called me out on it.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?" I asked.

"Play with your necklace," he pointed at my fingers.

"I guess I do that when I'm thinking about something important," I shrugged.

"Why?" Ben questioned. Why do they ask me so many questions?

"This necklace is important to me, so I guess I play with it when I'm thinking about something important."

"Why is it important to you?" Jimmy asked.

"Why are you guys asking me so many questions?"

"Because you never answer them," Ben pointed out.

"Then what's the point in asking?"

"The small possibility you actually will answer."

I shook my head. "It sounds like you two have me down to science."

"We're trying," Jimmy laughed. Again, they are so stupid sometimes. But they were my best guy friends so I guess I'd just have to deal with it.

"It's getting dark. We should head back to camp," Ben said out of no where.

"Yeah, let's go!" Jimmy pulled me up really quickly and Ben pushed me forward.

What the hell? "Something you guys want to tell me?"

"No." The two of them just kept pushing me faster as the sky got darker. Once I was forced into camp, I turned to go to my tent. But they had a different idea.

"Where are you going?" Ben asked grabbing my arm so I wouldn't leave.

"To my tent…" I looked back and forth between the two boys. Both of them had questionable faces.

"Take a walk with us," Jimmy said as he motioned away from the tent.

"If I don't come with you guys, how badly will Alyssa hurt you two?"

"A hell of a lot worse than that guy she killed, so come on," Ben pushed me again and I continued walking with them. Oh God, what did Alyssa have planned now?

Jimmy and Ben brought me to the little field Ben took me to a month ago. Except now, there was a fire pit going a few feet from the tree and Hal, Alyssa, and Matt were sitting around it waiting for me to get there. Alyssa would.

"What are you guys doing?" I asked as I walked up the small hill to where they were all sitting.

"We're just going to hang out and then give you some presents," Hal smiled.

I groaned. "I really don't want presents, guys."

"Suck it up, bitch," Alyssa said, grinning.

I rolled my eyes and sat down next to Alyssa with Matt on my other side. Hal was next to Alyssa, Ben was across the fire from me, and Jimmy was next to Matt.

"I'm going first!" Matt exclaimed and handed me a small box with a bow made of shoe laces. Where does he come up with this stuff?

I hate this so much, I thought as I smiled and took his present. I pulled the bow and opened the box. Inside were two earrings for the piercing I had on the helix of my ear. One was a small black hoop and the other was a silver hoop to replace the one I had in now. "Thanks, Matt! I needed some new ones," I gave him a one armed hug and put the box in my pocket. I wonder where he found these since I don't recall passing any kind of store that would sell these. I was grateful I had more now since I lost my other earring I had bought at the place I got it pierced.

"Here's the rest of mine," Alyssa smiled and handed me two more things covered in black paper. She knew me so well.

Alyssa set them in my hand and I unwrapped the first one. It was a picture frame with a very, very old photo inside. My eyes were glued to the shot.

It was one with my mom in it.

I had forgotten what she looked like, what she sounded like, and what she was like, and that picture made me remember again. Alyssa and I were in front of our moms while they were standing behind us smiling. That was the day Alyssa's mom was killed because I remember her calling me on the phone in tears asking to spend the night at my house because she didn't want to be home. I also remember that was the day when were both smiling kids with no problems in the world. I thought this photo was…gone.

"Oh my God," I breathed, still staring at the photo. I felt like if I looked away for a millisecond, it would disappear as a figment of my imagination. "How do you have this?"

"I found it when we were packing up to go to the 2nd Mass. I didn't even know I had it."

"Can we see it?" Hal asked.

Alyssa and I looked at each other. Neither of us wanted them to see it since we looked so much different than we did back then, but I didn't want to risk an outburst of tug of war and have the picture damaged so I passed it over to Hal.

"Is this you guys?" Hal questioned, clearly surprised.

"Five years ago," I answered.

"So that's what you look like without black on," Ben said thoughtfully as he stared at the photo.

"What?!" Jimmy and Matt exclaimed at the same time. They ran over to Hal and Ben and looked down at the photo.

Hal started laughing. "I didn't think you would be much of a pink person," he looked at his girlfriend.

Alyssa raised her eyebrows. "You want to try that again?"

He raised his hands up and kept looking at the picture. "So Kaylee was taller than you back then, too?"

"Yeah," I laughed. Alyssa socked Hal in the arm.

"Damn," he cursed and rubbed his arm.

"Your hair was so short," Jimmy pointed out. When I was ten, my hair barely passed my shoulders and I had bangs that went across my forehead. Now, my hair was a little bit past where a shirt sleeve ends. And my bangs were now to the left side of my face.

"My mom forced me to get my hair cut to here," I motioned to below my chin, "in kindergarten and I've been growing it out since."

"Are they your moms?" Matt asked us.

I smiled and nodded. "Renee Parker and Karen Carter."

Alyssa motioned for me to open the next one while the guys were distracted, so I tore off the tissue paper and was shocked all over again. It was a picture from the same day and had dragged our moms into a photo booth to take pictures. There was a picture of my mom and me, Alyssa's mom and her, one of all of us, and then one of just Alyssa and me. And we were wearing those stupid flower headbands that Karen begged us to get so we wore them in the picture. Oh my God I looked so stupid.

"Those headbands," I put my hand in my face.

Alyssa laughed. "I think I still have mine."

I shook my head. "That's one thing I'm glad I don't have. I can't believe you've had these pictures this whole time."

"I didn't even know until we were packing up to leave. That's when I found them on my dresser."

I stared down at Alyssa and I's grinning faces. That was our last day of being happy together. Even when Karen was killed, I wasn't ever happy because my best friend wasn't and my second mom wasn't around anymore. And things basically went downhill from there.

Hal took the picture from my lap and passed it to everyone to look at. "Flower head bands? On the two baddest ass people of the 2nd Mass?"

"My mom made us wear them," Alyssa stated.

"I never wore mine again," I shook my head.

"Bull shit," Ben coughed ever so subtly.

"True shit," I coughed ever so subtly back. Everybody laughed and soon enough the guys were done making fun of us for what we looked like in the past.

Hal looked around randomly and then looked at me. "I had a gift for you, but I have no idea where it went."

"Good, I didn't want one anyway," I smiled at him.

"I wasn't done," Alyssa said, "Kaylee you gave me a song on my birthday and as your best friend it is my job to one up you so here.

Look at this photograph

Every time I do it makes me laugh

How did are faces get so red

What the hell is on Kaylee's head?

And this is where I grew up

I think the present owner fixed it up

I never knew we'd ever went without

The second floor is hard for sneaking out

And this is where I went to school

Most of the time I had better things to do

Criminal record says I broke in twice

Must have done it half a dozen times

Every memory of lookin' out the back door

I have my photo album spread out on my bedroom floor

It's hard to say it

Time to say it

Good bye, good bye

Every memory of walkin out that front door

I found the photo of the friend I was lookin for

It's hard to say it

Time to say it

Good bye good bye good bye

Remember the old arcade?

Blew every dollar we ever made

Cops hated us hangin around

They said someone went and burnt it down

We use to listen to the radio

And sing along with every song we know

We said someday we'd find out how it feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, God, I
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye.
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye.
I miss that town
I miss the faces
You can't erase
You can't replace it
I miss it now
I can't believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it
If I could I relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye.
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye.
Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
Every time I do it makes me..."

"That was amazing. I love it." I grinned at Alyssa and she gave me a big hug.

Ben stood up with something behind his back. "I couldn't really wrap this, so I kind of just have to give it to you like this."

And then Ben Mason handed me a classical steel string acoustic guitar.

I was absolutely, completely, and totally stunned. I haven't seen a guitar in eight months. I haven't played one in an even longer time. "Where the hell did you find one?"

"You took the guitar?!" Hal looked at his brother.

"I saw it in a shop and I took it," he shrugged.

"That's where I hid it, dumbass!"

They started arguing but I didn't care. I had a guitar in my hands. Something that made music. I missed playing instruments more than I missed anything in the universe. Music was my only ally in my battle with the anger and the hatred, and I tried to grasp anything I had left of it.

I began to strum a little to tune it since it sounded like hell at the moment. I didn't hear anyone's voice or the leaves rustling; all I heard was the guitar and its sound. I have a guitar again. I actually have something to play music on.

"Do you like it?" Ben asked.

"It's actually perfect since I just finished writing a song yesterday that I really wanted to play guitar with," I beamed at him.

"Sing it for us," Matt said excitedly.

"You guys gotta sing it with me though," I said. They nodded and I began strumming the song that was my favorite I've ever written.

"If today's the day I die
Lay me down under the lights
Let me fall in love
Let me save a life

And let me lose my voice
Singing all my favorite songs
Let me stare up at the stars
'Cause it's where we all belong

My heart like a firework in my chest
My only regret is having regrets
Travelled the world
I loved every step

And all I know is:
No one, no one lives forever
We will be remembered
For what we do right now

And baby I'm living louder
And dreaming longer, tonight
(We're living louder, we're living louder)
And baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight
(We're loving stronger, we're loving stronger)

'Cause we're all just kids
Who grew up way too fast
Yeah the good die young
But the great will always last
We're growing older
But we're all soldiers tonight

If today's the day I go
Gonna drink with all my friends
Gonna laugh until we cry
As we talk and reminisce

And let me kiss a stranger
And rob the local bank
Let me become real rich
So I can give it all away

'Cause no one, no one lives forever
But we will be remembered
For what we do right now

And baby I'm living louder
And dreaming longer, tonight
(We're living louder, we're living louder)," Alyssa sang with me on that part, and then the guys joined in as well.
"And baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight
(We're loving stronger, we're loving stronger)

'Cause we're all just kids
Who grew up way too fast
Yeah the good die young
But the great will always last

We're growing older
But we're all soldiers tonight

When you've got your breath inside your head
Every day's a second chance
If I wake up with a beating heart
Will I stand or will I fall?

I'm living louder
Dreaming longer tonight
Baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight

And baby I'm living louder
And dreaming longer tonight
(We're living louder, we're living louder)
And baby I'm fighting harder
And loving stronger tonight
(We're loving stronger, we're loving stronger)

'Cause we're all just kids
Who grew up way too fast
Yeah the good die young
But the great will always last
We're growing older
But we're all soldiers tonight."

We were all kids that grew up way too fast, and from this day on, I was going to live louder, dream longer, love stronger, and fight harder until I died.

Alyssa's POV

"Hey guys do you want to here Kaylee's gift?" They stared at me. "It's a song I wrote her. I want to know if it's good."

"I wanna hear!" Matt said.

"Okay here goes

Look at this photograph

Every time I do it makes me laugh

How did are faces get so red

What the hell is on Kaylee's head?

And this is where I grew up

I think the present owner fixed it up

I never knew we'd ever went without," I was going to keep going, but we heard the footsteps of Ben Kaylee and Jimmy approaching.

"What are you guys doing?" Kaylee asked us, suspiciously

"We're just going to hang out and then give you some presents," Hal smiled.

"I really don't want presents, guys."

"Suck it up, bitch," I smiled.

They all sat down. I was next to Kaylee and Matt was next to her Jimmy was next to him. Ben sat across from Kaylee and Hal was next to me. "I'm going first!" Matt yelled as he pulled out Kaylee's gift.

Kaylee looked like she might be actually enjoying herself. Matt had given her two earrings. "Thanks, Matt! I needed some new ones."

"Here's the rest of mine," I handed her the pictures.

Kaylee just stared at them, unable to look up. She was utterly shocked and completely caught off guard. Not something that happens much. I was kinda proud of myself for that.

"Oh my God," she said, still never looking up. "How do you have this?"

"I found it when we were packing up to go to the 2nd Mass. I didn't even know I had it."

"Can we see it?" Hal asked.

I looked at her. I really didn't want her to let him see, and I could tell she didn't either. She handed it to him anyway.

"Is this you guys?" Hal questioned, clearly surprised.

"Five years ago," Kaylee said.

"So that's what you look like without black on," Ben said. That got their attention.

"What?!" Jimmy and Matt exclaimed at the same time. They ran over to Hal and Ben and looked down at the photo.

Hal started laughing. "I didn't think you would be much of a pink person," he looked at me.

I just looked back at him. "You want to try that again?"

He raised his hands in defeat. "So Kaylee was taller than you back then, too?"

"Yeah," she said smiling. That's it. He was asking for it. I punched him in the arm.

"Damn." I smirked at his pain.

"Your hair was so short."

"My mom forced me to get my hair cut to here, in kindergarten and I've been growing it out since."

"Are they your moms?" Matt asked us.

"Renee Parker and Karen Carter." Kaylee answered.

I motioned for her to open the next gift. She laughed a little when she saw it "Those headbands."

"I think I still have mine."

"That's one thing I'm glad I don't have. I can't believe you've had these pictures this whole time."

"I didn't even know until we were packing up to leave. That's when I found them on my dresser."

"Flower head bands? On the two baddest ass people of the 2ndMass?" Hal looked at us.

"My mom made us wear them," I said.

"I never wore mine again," Kaylee shook her head.

"Bull shit," Ben coughed.

"True shit," Kaylee replied.

"I had a gift for you, but I have no idea where it went."

"Good, I didn't want one anyway,"

"I wasn't done. Kaylee you gave me a song on my birthday and as your best friend it is my job to one up you so here.

Look at this photograph

Every time I do it makes me laugh

How did are faces get so red

What the hell is on Kaylee's head?

And this is where I grew up

I think the present owner fixed it up

I never knew we'd ever went without

The second floor is hard for sneaking out

And this is where I went to school

Most of the time I had better things to do

Criminal record says I broke in twice

Must have done it half a dozen times

Every memory of lookin' out the back door

I have my photo album spread out on my bedroom floor

It's hard to say it

Time to say it

Good bye, good bye

Every memory of walkin out that front door

I found the photo of the friend I was lookin for

It's hard to say it

Time to say it

Good bye good bye good bye

Remember the old arcade?

Blew every dollar we ever made

Cops hated us hangin around

They said someone went and burnt it down

We use to listen to the radio

And sing along with every song we know

We said someday we'd find out how it feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel

"That was amazing. I love it." I smiled and gave Kaylee a big hug.

Ben stood up and walked to the birthday girl. "I couldn't really wrap this, so I kind of just have to give it to you like this."

Kaylee's eyes lit up when she saw it. "Where the hell did you find one?"

"You took the guitar?!" I looked at Hal. I knew he was planning on getting Kaylee a guitar but he lost it.

"I saw it in a shop and I took it," Ben shrugged.

"That's where I hid it, dumbass!" Hal was shooting daggers at his brother. I just smiled and grabbed his hand.

"Calm down. Kaylee's happy and you're now her favorite because you don't have a gift," I said.

"Do you like it?" Ben asked.

"It's actually perfect since I just finished writing a song yesterday that I really wanted to play guitar with," Kaylee grinned at him.

"Sing it for us," Matt said all excited.

"You guys gotta sing it with me though," Kaylee said and she started to sing.