I'm back and blacker than ever. Hahaha I love saying that, and seriously I really did go from like caramel to mahogany color during this last month, but I digress. I barely got this in before the month was over. With the upcoming arrival of Guild Wars 2 and this god forsaken English lit assignment I got I might not be posting again until September, but fear not, that isn't a definite. Also the song being mentioned is pretty much any Mary J. Blige song from the My Life Album, for me it was Be With You. Not much left for me to add except Review and Enjoy =).

Justin lay on his bed staring at the ceiling in an attempt to collect himself after another busy work week. It was Friday and had been three weeks since he woke up in bed with Andrew and Austin. After they had left him alone their following encounters with each other seemed strange to Justin, as if something wasn't right. He quickly realized that he was never alone with either for more than five minutes and if he hung out with Austin that meant he was hanging out with Andrew too, vice versa.

He still wasn't sure what that conversation the two hid from him entailed either. He figured it was why things were so strange, but he couldn't get either to tell him about it. With all this going on he almost forgot his birthday was coming up on Monday. He wasn't really that excited about it, turning 26 officially meant he was getting old, something that disturbed him a little bit. Regardless he promised his mother he'd go to his Grandpa's house on Sunday to celebrate. He sighed as he fell deeper into his thoughts before he heard his front door open. He shot upwards quickly reaching for the bat under his bed before he heard familiar voices call his name.

"God damn it could you two knock first before barging in here!" He yelled out from his room. "And I thought I took that key from you?" Justin soon met his two friends in the living room still on edge from their uninvited entry.

"You did, but I took it back when you weren't looking back." Andrew teased as he waved the card in front of Justin.

"Besides we wanted to surprise you." Austin said grinning, holding a cake in his hands. "Happy 26th"

"I don't turn 26 for 3 more days; let me enjoy my youth while I still have it." He answered dejectedly.

"We're taking you out to party." Andrew said grinning.

"No. Absolutely not, do you two ever get sick of clubbing?" He questioned

"No not really" Andrew responded flatly.

"Well I do, can't we just stay in or just go out to eat?" Suarez pleaded.

"No I don't think so; you are going out for your birthday."

Justin groaned in protest. "It's my birthday shouldn't it be my decision?" He snapped. "I'm freaking exhausted it's been a long week."

"I'll tell you what. We'll let you decide where to go then, but you're going out." Austin proposed. Justin glared at both of them for several seconds before throwing up his hands in defeat.

"Fine, but both of you are assholes and I hope you rot in Hell." He spat as he went to get his things together.

"We love you too Juse." Austin responded with a triumphant smile.

After they went out to eat they forced Justin to choose a place to go dancing. He decided to choose the least raucous place he could think of, a gay bar Marc had shown him a few years ago for the 35 and up crowd. As soon as they walked in Andrew shot him a confused look.

"What kind of place is this?" Andrew questioned.

"You two said it could be where ever I wanted so I chose here." Justin said sarcastically.

"This isn't a club." Andrew said dryly.

"No, but there's music to dance to if you want, use your imagination. Grandpa eying you over there could be your next sexual conquest." He said indicating a man no younger than 50 that had watched them come through the door. Justin couldn't keep the smile on his face after seeing Andrew's dejected expression. "If you don't want to say we could just call it a night and go home."

"Nice try Juse, we'll have a blast." He said answered coolly.

Despite being forced out that night Justin actually had fun. Although he and Austin felt fairly comfortable in their surroundings Andrew felt completely out of his element. As a result he decided to drink his discomfort away while his two friends laughed at his misery. After a few drinks he'd gotten comfortable enough to chat up another patron at least 10 years his senior. The two ended up dancing, leaving Austin and Justin alone for the first time since they'd found each other a few months ago.

"Ten bucks says he gets pissy drunk by the end of the night." Justin said facing the area Andrew was dancing.

"Twenty says he goes home with him." Austin replied staring at Justin.

"He won't do that." Justin mused.

"How do you know that? They seem to be having fun."

"He still wants me back." Justin answered without looking away from the dance floor.

"That's awfully conceited Juse." He smirked.

"Not when it's true" Justin rest his back and elbows on the counter as he turned his head to Austin. "And unless I'm mistaken you want me back too."

Austin gazed at Justin for a moment. He wasn't sure how to respond and there was no discernible tone of voice to tell how Justin felt about him having feelings for him. Before he could speak though, Justin continued.

"It's fine I guess. You can feel how you want to feel just don't hold your breathe on me or anything; ok." He shifted focus to the beer in his hand. Austin was still a little taken back by Justin's admission, but decided to ask questions.

"How long have you known?"

"Are you kidding me?" Justin chuckled. "You and Andrew aren't that good at hiding your intentions. I had suspicions since the Mode show, I just wasn't completely sure until pride."

"So what does it mean now that you know?"

"Nothing"

"Nothing?" Austin looked puzzled.

Justin just nodded into his beer. It wasn't hard for him to piece together the obvious, that he had conflicting feelings for the other two. He'd recognized them a while back and had chosen to play the fence about things by just keeping them both as friends, rather than hurting the other.

He knew that picking Austin would be the perfect revenge on Andrew for his infidelity, but he wasn't that kind of person and he still cared for Andrew as he knew Andrew did him. On the other hand if he were to choose Andrew he'd end up crushing Austin, again. He couldn't stand the thought of losing him a second time; there was too much history to let him go again especially considering he just came back into his life.

The truth was both men still held a piece of his heart and he wasn't willing to smash the pieces of their hearts that they left with him.

The conflicted thoughts were stressing Justin out and Austin saw the sudden change of expression on his face. He was going to pat his arm, but decided against it, instead asking for a dance.

"Come on why should Andrew have all the fun." Austin smiled and offered his hand. There was hesitation at first, but the smile was eventually returned with his friend's hand in his. He led him to the dance floor next to a tipsy Andrew and his companion.

Being a 35 and older bar the music playing was older as well and some of unfamiliar to Austin and Justin. It didn't matter though, they moved to the slow bellowing of one of Mary j. Blige's 90's era songs. It was a nice slow dance unlike the one's they had previous where Justin was being whisked back and forth or grinded between the other two. It brought a smile to his face, to turn his attention to something other than his inner thoughts, but it had somewhat of an opposite effect on Austin.

It brought back nostalgic memories of Hilda's wedding and Justin's 16th birthday, memories that he still cherished, but missed dearly. He was always nostalgic for those days, not much after that had gone right and dancing alone with Justin reminded him of that.

He hoped that he and Justin could be together, but he was starting to question whether or not such a thing would be possible. He mulled this over the whole time they danced and remained silent once they sat down. It wasn't until a few hours later a now completely drunk Andrew caused him to stop his thoughts.

"I told you." Justin mused. "You owe me 10 bucks." Austin laughed at the sorry site in front of him before placing an Alexander Hamilton into Justin's hand.

"For what huh, you two betting on me?" Andrew slurred.

"I don't think he'll make it back to his apartment. Maybe he should stay with me." Justin proposed, ignoring Andrew.

"That works for me." Andrew smirked.

"You can stay too if you want." Justin offered. Austin just nodded, but kept silent the entire way back.

As soon as they got back Andrew started throwing up. His two companions hurried him into the bathroom and decided it would be best to let him have Justin's bed after he'd passed out over the toilet. Once they got him undressed they tossed him on the bed and went into the living room together.

"Happy birthday Juse." Austin said with a sheepish smile. He plopped down on the couch and Justin followed his example.

"It still won't be my birthday for another two days. Speaking of which, I never even touched that cake you two bought."

"It wasn't bought, I made it." Austin answered while rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. Justin looked him over for a second with an expressionless face before sliding over to give Austin a hug. Instinctively Austin hugged back and he became very relaxed.

"Thank you" He whispered into his ear. It was only a few seconds before they parted somewhat reluctantly. Despite still being torn Justin felt comfortable and safe wrapped in his companion's arms. He missed the feeling. Austin missed it too and it caused his thoughts to return to where they were at the bar.

"Can I ask you something?" He said turning to Juse.

"Sure"

Austin took a deep breath before asking his question. He'd asked himself the same thing many times over the years, especially during his dark days. Now he was about to ask the apple of his eye and he wasn't sure what the response would be.

"What do you think would've happened had things not ended, between us I mean?" Justin sat silent for several minutes and Austin was about to talk again before replying.

"Honestly, I really don't know. I'd like to say we'd be doing this or that, but all things considered, and the reasons for why it ended I don't think I could answer that." Austin's heart sank a little, but instead of sitting silently he asked a different question.

"Back at the bar when I asked what were you going to do with the knowledge of our feelings for you, you said nothing, why?" Once again Justin took a few minutes to gather his thoughts.

"A piece of me still loves you, both of you. The reason I said nothing is because I don't want to have to choose one and hurt the other. So for me to acknowledge your feelings would mean that either I shut one or both of you out. It would be like Sophie's choice and I just can't do that." Austin stared at him for a second. He was a mix of emotions, but mostly irritation.

"That's not fair. It's not fair to either of us. Do you know how selfish that sounds?" He responded in an accusatory voice. Justin shifted his eyes to the floor.

"I know it is and I'm sorry." His head tilted down in defeat and Austin couldn't help, but soften.

"We're big boys Juse; whoever you don't choose will recover from it. You can't keep us in limbo forever." Justin kept his head down, but agreed with Austin nonetheless. There was yet again another long silence before Austin interjected. "It's only 12:47 if you aren't tired I could cut us both a slice of cake." Justin lifted his head and shared a weak smile.

The two decided to watch TV until they felt sleepy and it wasn't until almost 3 that Austin started nodding off. They had watched TV in silence, but not the same awkward silence that followed their earlier conversation; as a result Austin didn't notice that Justin had drifted off to sleep an hour earlier until his body fell unto his lap. It caught him by surprise and he was forced to suppress a yelp. Justin hadn't been disturbed at all and actually made himself more comfortable.

As he looked down he couldn't help but admire Juse's sleeping form. He'd rather be sleeping next to him than have him sprawled across his lap, but this was a close second. He slid a hand through Justin's hair and let it rest there comfortably before he bent over and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"Goodnight Juse." He whispered. Austin relaxed his body and leaned back into the couch before dosing off for good.

TBC