Originally I was going to make these two seperate chapters but I figure you guys have earned a longer chapter for putting up with me so here you are. As some - most - of you are getting impatient, I'm skipping to the good stuff and then we'll see what I can do. Now, while I have your attention, I wanted to run something by you guys.

See I know how the story ends - I know how Kate and Rick figure out she's Allison and how they deal with it etc. - but the getting there stuff is open for debate. I'e randomly come up with these cute little one-shots that would fit sometime before the whole Allison thing but really, they can stand alone. It would, however, prolong the ending and the whole Allison deal. SO my question to you is: what do you want? Do you want me to keep going how I'm going and end the stroy where I've planned it or do you want to add in some more scenes? It's up to you guys.

But until then, here's a new chapter for you my sweets.

Please review and as always you can follow me on twitter you can find me at vatrask

Enjoy 3

Kate watched as Rick slowly wrapped his arms around Natalie Rhodes – the actress set to play Nikki Heat in the upcoming Heat Wave movie – the kiss moving in neither direction. As the elevator doors closed, she continued to stare at the spot where they had been, unsure as to what to do. She felt something rise up and wrap around her chest and she pretended that she didn't immediately recognize the familiar ping of jealousy. But why should she be jealous? She wasn't dating him; they weren't a couple; she was just his partner. And what was he thinking, kissing her, anyways? Didn't he have Gina? She did not just spit at his publisher's name because that was what jealous women did and Kate Beckett was not a jealous woman – especially not of Rick Castle, playboy extraordinaire. He was egotistical, completely insensitive, a womanizer, totally immature and, now, a cheater.

But he could be so selfless sometimes. All of those instances where he had tackled her to the ground as a bullet had come flying at them from a suspect; she remembered when they had first met, how selfish he was and – as much as it pained her – he had grown. He wasn't as self-absorbed as he used to be. All of those moments when he had stayed by her side – or stepped aside – when she was dealing with something particularly difficult in her life. He always seemed to know what she needed, even if she didn't. She hated to admit it but he knew her very well – better than most – and he loved to rub it in her face by being mister sensitive right when she needed him to be. Of course he wasn't always the perfect gentleman but that wasn't too bad either. She just wished that he didn't flaunt his relationships around whenever he slept with one of his bimbos. But come to think of it, she hadn't seen – or heard – of many conquests lately. Even before he was dating Gina, his scandalous liaisons were becoming few and far between. There were a few close calls but she was beginning to wonder if his playboy attitude was merely a publicity stunt. After all, hyper man-children are not exactly the most appealing so what possibility was there that he was actually a womanizing man-whore? Very little. She could, however, imagine him as the kid in the candy store that he truly was, jumping around, trying all of the different sugary treats. If she was honest with herself, he really had grown up from the moment they first met. She especially loved watching him with Alexis. The few times she had seen them together made her feel almost privileged. He was a good father and she knew that but that didn't stop her from loving his inner child that poked its head out every chance it got. He made her life fun and, as a cop with an excessive amount of baggage, she needed fun.

Him as a cheater, though? She couldn't find something to love in that. That was the deal breaker. Regardless of who he was with, she had always considered him to be faithful – especially after Meredith – but she knew very well that the kiss she had just witnessed was anything but platonic.

Right about now, they would probably be jumping into a taxi together, headed towards her apartment – Alexis would be at his home – and that was as far as she could get. Her mind – or her heart – wouldn't let her go any farther than the front door of Natalie's apartment despite knowing that Rook and Nikki would go a lot farther than that.

Finally willing herself to look away from the offending images, snapping her jaw shut, Kate busied herself with adjusting and readjusting the pile of papers on her desk blinking away frustration – not tears, she told herself. Oh who was she kidding? She was jealous as hell of Castle and her body-double. If she hadn't known better, she would have sworn that it looked like her and Castle lost in a lip lock but of course it wasn't and she certainly didn't want that so why was she suddenly blushing? Oh that's right – Maddie's words suddenly hit her upside the head – she was hot for Castle.

It was a few moments after the elevator doors closed completely that Rick finally regained his senses. What they hell was he doing? Oh that's right, the lower half of his brain reminded, you're kissing the love of your life. But these weren't Beckett's lips – not that he'd ever tasted them before – and this wasn't Beckett's body – that he knew for certain – but she looked so much like her and even… he inhaled subtly and caught the slightest whiff of cherries. Groaning, he allowed himself one more moment of make-believe bliss before using the hand on her upper arms to push her just far enough for their lips to part. She looked immediately stunned but he could still see lust in those eyes – the ones that weren't hers – and she kept her own fingers lost in his hair. She tried her best "smoldering Beckett" look – though she would never tell him that was what she had named the attempt at seduction – and let a smile play at her lips.

"Come home with me?" She whispered a breath away from his lips. He stared down at her for a long moment, weighing his options. He could go home with her – it's not like he and Gina were on the greatest of terms at the moment – but could he do that to her? Would it feel the same knowing that she was only pretending to be Nikki and she wasn't real? The real one – the one he wanted – was back at the precinct most likely having a mental breakdown from having two people shadow her; one who hadn't answered the other's request. With a grateful smile, he finished his previous task of pushing her away.

"Not tonight." He spoke as the elevator doors dinged open and he hurriedly made his way to find an empty cab. No way in hell was he sticking around to explain his actions. Usually, when beautiful women threw themselves at him, he never resisted but lately, he would always get this weird pinch in his neck and he would remember that it would be wrong to do things like that. So he settled for twiddling his thumbs all the way back to his own apartment until the driver pulled up and Rick paid for the ride.

As he rode the elevator up to his apartment, he kept trying to figure out why he had rejected Natalie's advances. He wasn't a cheater but he and Gina were one slap away from breakup as it was so that wouldn't have mattered. Could it be…? He suddenly hit the emergency stop button and as the elevator came to a full stop, he backed himself against the wall.

He was in love with her.

Truly, madly, deeply in love with Kate Beckett. It was the only logical explanation. He couldn't be with other women because he was already in a committed relationship with a woman who wouldn't ever acknowledge his affections. Simple as that. Taking a moment to collect his thoughts and get over the initial shock of a long awaited confession, Rick caught his breath and pushed the button for the elevator to continue its ascent up to his loft. But this time, his eyes were glowing just a little bit. He didn't care if it looked like an afterglow, he was going to relish in the feeling of seeing everything clearly. He knew that as soon as he went back to the precinct, everything would go back to normal but maybe normal was exactly what he needed. It wasn't like this was anything new. He had known for a long time that he was indeed hot for Beckett. Now it was just a matter of making her see it too.

Fifteen years since her mother died. Fifteen since she'd last seen her mother smile. Twelve since Royce left….the first time. Ten since Will left her the first time. Seven since her dad was finally sober. Three since Richard Castle walked into her life and sat down on the couch to watch her life like it was a soap opera. Which is where he was at the moment; the couch of her apartment. Her dad had just left, having dropped off the boxes of old photos, leaving her and Castle alone in her apartment to look through her past as a way of healing – and of letting him into her life just that little bit more. Usually she resisted when he tried to intrude on her personal life but she had agreed to let him have this one if it meant giving her a lead on her mother's killer.

So they sat, and they talked, and they laughed liked they had known each other all their lives when in fact it had been about three years (come March – not that she was counting). And then she pulled out the box of old Christmas photos, the ones that had been taken the Christmas after she got back from Kiev, and her eyes misted over while his light up like the fourth of July. He was enjoying this – and not just because Beckett was willingly letting him in – but because this was such an important part of her past that was just for them to share; this wasn't about gaining background for Nikki Heat, this was about them. So yes, he was happy and yes he was blatantly checking out 'younger Beckett' in those photos with a cute little leer.

Until he found a photo of her laughing – like full on, falling off her chair kind of laughter – and his breath caught for a moment, taken in by her beauty and flash of his past that grabbed hold of his heart and squeezed. Beckett noticed after a moment and looked at him in concern "Rick, what's wrong?"

Her voice brought him back to the present but he was still staring at the photo "nothing," he muttered though he barely believed himself let alone expected Beckett to "it's just…when you smile like that, you look someone that I used to know."

She looked him over – his paled skin, his ragged breathing, his far off bright blue eyes – and she smiled softly, keeping her voice low so as to not disturb him. "You must have really liked her." She suddenly thought back to Kyra and shook away that sudden pang of jealousy and sympathy that rose from that entire encounter.

"For a moment I thought I loved her." There was no way to push that one away; he had loved her? He rarely used the word love in the context of women. This girl must have been very special.

"What happened?"

Rick was silent a long moment, flashing back to her smile and the way she'd pressed her hand into his arm while she laughed whole-heartedly at the lame jokes he made. Allison. "It wasn't meant to be." He remembered telling himself that during the year after they met when all he could think about was her; if they were truly meant to see each other again then he and Allison would have met again – even if it was on the street corner while she pushed her baby stroller around. And then he blinked it all away because he'd known the girl for six hours and that had been more than fifteen years ago.

So he came back to the present – to Kate –and smiled at her with that wrinkled, endearing look that made her heart quicken and she moved past the momentary sadness in favor of what she knew – teasing and playing and laughing. Whoever it was that had stolen his heart all those years ago was gone now – as was Kyra, and Meredith and Gina and all those other women he'd slept with over the years. She had to convince herself that he was changing; and he was. Somehow he was different from the man she had first met three years ago (in March) and she had nothing to worry about in regards to her relationship with Castle…which was still undetermined.

After spending all this time with him she still wasn't sure what he was to her and she was absolutely terrified to venture into the unknown, convincing her to leave a good thing alone even if it could be great and focus on the here and now; her mother's murder case.

It hadn't taken much to convince her not to touch the case after the Coonan Shooting – which she still occasionally go flack for down at 1PP – but after Castle left her for the summer, she needed something to get her mind off the jerk and so she spent her free time – the time when she wasn't at work, or working out, or with her now boyfriend Josh – building a murder board in the shutters of her apartment, keeping the windows permanently closed and letting little light into the room. And now the shutters were wide open and staring in the face, daring her to take the leap into the unknown knowing Castle would jump with her but not knowing where they would land or if they would land at all. She hated the unknown; but this one was unavoidable.

Actually, according to pretty much everyone in her life, all of this was avoidable if only she'd put the past behind her and move on but she couldn't. Not now that she knew it wasn't just some random act of gang violence. Not now that the man who had investigated her mother's murder was dead – shot before her very eyes. Not now that she did have Castle jump with her, to hold her hand while she dangled off the edge of a building while she reached for the answer that was just out of reach. He would always be there to grab her hand if she slipped so she was definitely safe.

It also didn't hurt that she carried a gun which made her feel extra safe; especially when a burly bodyguard was making his way towards her while she and Castle pretended to be drunk off each other – no, she was not going to go there – having a gun was definitely a plus. So she reached for the gun in question, ready to have some epic shootout that would most likely end in her or Castle getting shot but what else was there to do when they were in an open parking lot with no cover and a man who was just about to figure out that they weren't a drunk couple walking home. There was no other alternative.

But Castle's a creative guy – being a writer and all – and he figured out another solution. He kissed her. Yup, he kissed her.

What the hell?

And it had been a nice kiss too. His lips were chapped from the winter air and his hands were freezing despite spending most of their walk inside his pockets, but all of that melted away when his hand gently wrapped around her neck and pulled her to him, his lips washing over her in a wave of gut-tightening warmth. She, however, was completely frozen; not in a 'oh my god it's freaking cold in this parking lot' sense so much as a 'oh my god Richard Castle is kissing me and mmmmmmm' she lost track of what she was saying when he moved his lips over hers once again, massaging her bottom lip with his own. It was wonderful and powerful and just…it was too much. She pulled back, just far enough so she could stare into his eyes, prepared to ask him what the hell he was thinking and would he like to do it again; but then she caught sight of the man behind her, eyeing them like a piece of meat that he wasn't quite sure about. And she realized what the hell he was doing; he was being a distraction. He was doing what a cop would do; improvise and go with the flow in a desperate situation. So she looked back at him, ready to make her move on the bodyguard when she saw his eyes.

Oceans of blue that she'd always gotten lost in so she tried her best to avoid but when the seas were raging and dark, it was hard to turn away. Not with his mouth open, inhaling the night air with hot gasps of air, still plump from the blood flowing through his skin; not when his eyes were clouded over and all thoughts of anyone else were gone from his mind. There was no way she could resist Richard Castle when he looked like that – so she didn't resist.

She fell in. Head first with her arms wide open, wrapped around his upper body, taking charge of the electricity flowing through them. She climbed up higher on his body, looking for just the right angle to…there, right there; yes it was perfect. The perfect kiss all sloppy and heated, the perfect atmosphere…

She came back to reality for a moment, still kissing the hell out of him and climbing him like a koala bear as best she could in this outfit, but she was hyper aware of the man observing them with a little amusement and a little lust. Using Castle's distraction to her advantage – again – she turned him just enough so she had the momentum to spin and knock the bodyguard on his ass.

Adrenaline pumping through her very soul, she breathed deep, heavy breaths in the night air, trying to cool her body heat and failing miserably. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea. Why had they done that again? Right, something about distracting the bodyguard; why? Right, right…something about Ryan and Esposito….in trouble! Right, they were kidnapped by the bad guys and they were going to save them. Right. "That was amazing." She swallowed, hazarding a glance at Castle for the first time since she'd done her little dive off the cliff and wasn't disappointed at what she found there. His jacket and shirt were disheveled, his hair a mess from where she'd run her fingers through it, and lips were swollen and pink as she was sure hers was – she didn't dare check for fear she'd taste him on her lips and then Ryan and Esposito would never be saved.

So she kept looking at him until he stuttered a response, making him think that what they'd just done was not up for discussion – which it wasn't, of course – and the two of them made their way into the warehouse to save the day.

But she couldn't help it, the temptation was too much. Not three feet after turning away from Castle, she brought her hand to her lips and wiped away the last remnants of his kiss. There was plenty of time to discuss it later, she decided, right now they had to go be heroes.