A/N: I decided to have another Car Argument. Haha. I like this one a lot more than some of my others. Why, you ask? Because it's AN ACTUAL ARGUMENT!

Disclaimer: I do not own Ben 10 in any way whatsoever.

"Forks are a totally legit weapon," insisted Kevin, his hand tight on the wheel. "It's easily capable of killing!"

The redhead and her brunette cousin had been listening to this rant for a little under an hour and neither believed the facts that Kevin presented for them, all on forks and how they were potentially fatal weapons. The Osmosian was dead set on proving that forks were dangerous enough to be called a weapon. He was serious beyond belief.

"Kev," began the girl, flipping some of her red locks over one confidently raised shoulder, "forks are not weapons. Understand?" Gwen knew she was right and that was what bothered her the most. She was so eager to prove Kevin wrong that she was ready to just throw him out of his car if he didn't shut up soon. "They're utensils for eating, not used for mass destruction."

"Gwen Gwen Gwen," said the Osmosian, soda in hand as the three sat within the green and black vehicle just outside of the infamous Burger Shack that Kevin loved so dearly, "you clearly haven't seen what some guys do with it outside of our solar system. You need to keep an open mind." He tapped his skull with one finger and nodded smugly. "I've seen multiple bodies mutilated with just forks alone."

This made Ben's eyes widen in the backseat. "How does that work?" asked the brunette teen in the backseat with a bit of surprise spreading across his now excited features. "They're forks!"

"Well," started Kevin with an especially devilish smile, "some like to pack a catapult with forks and fire it at the enemy. That works pretty good. Bodies get mutilated nicely with the aerodynamics of the forks." The dark teen took one calloused hand off the wheel and held it parallel to the road and dove it into the dashboard of the car as a demonstration. "And you'd be amazed how many fights there are over food on some poorer planets. Use a fork 'cause it's the best thing you got and you might get killed or you might get an extra breadcrumb."

Gwen's eyes widened for a moment. She had never thought of people fighting over food with forks. That was definitely a more likely possibility than the catapult that Kevin had mentioned. "Seriously?"

Kevin nodded, saying, "Been there, tried that, not plannin' on heading back any time soon. And, I have learned to keep money on hand at all times."

"But there's no way forks are considered weapons," said Ben from the backseat, folding his arms across his chest with an indignant "harrumpf". "By law or anything, I mean. The government can't take away forks. They're used for eating, not as weapons."

"Not by everyone," pointed out Kevin as he sank into the driver's seat a bit more. "Here, Gwen, get me my fork out of the glove compartment."

The redhead raised an eyebrow in her boyfriend's direction. "What?" she asked, words nearly spluttering as she tried to muster the idea of Kevin keeping a fork in his glove compartment. "You have a fork in your glove compartment?" Her voice was a mix between high-pitched disbelief and confused anger.

Kevin nodded coolly, his eyes glimmering with the amusement of seeing Gwen confused. She was always funny when she was confused. "Yes, I do have a fork in my glove compartment."

"Why?" asked Ben, giggling in the backseat as he toppled over to one side. Kevin had a fork in his glove compartment. For the bearer of the Ultimatrix, that had to be the funniest thing he had heard since the refrigerator joke that Kevin had told him. "Why would you have a stupid fork in your glove compartment?"

With a small shrug, Kevin watched his girlfriend as she opened up the glove compartment with one delicate hand and pulled out the small metal utensil from within, a faint smile pressed to her thin lips. "I just figured that if my car does happen to get infiltrated, despite all the alien tech and everything, I should keep a weapon on hand, you know? A safety precaution."

"I would recommend a laser or a dagger or a boomerang even," said Gwen, eyes narrowing slightly in the Osmosian's direction, "but definitely not a fork, Kev." The girl handed him his supposed "weapon".

"Would you like to see me demonstrate my amazing ninja moves with this fork?" asked the dark teen, obsidian eyes glimmering with the idea of showing off in front of Gwen. He liked showing off in front of girls, but especially in front of his beloved redhead. "You should know that it is one of the most technological weapons of our time."

Ben had fallen onto the floor of the backseat at that point. If he had been drinking a smoothie or snacking on chili fries, something would've come out of his nose at that point.

"Sure it is," said Gwen, her eyes watching her boyfriend as he began to play with the fork, twirling it like the color guard at her school would. And he was actually making it look like a small ninja sword or something of the likes.

At least until it slipped from between his fingers and stabbed the windshield. "Really?" asked Kevin, staring at the fork in complete disgust. "Seriously? Did that actually just do that to my poor car?"

Gwen was laughing as hard as Ben now, unable to hide the giggles that had racked her body like a bad cold. She just couldn't help herself. "Yeah, I guess you're right," she snickered, trying to tame her giggling and failing miserably. "A fork is a weapon."

Kevin scowled at her, once more picking up his soda and drinking it, upset that the fork had stabbed his windshield and had left more than a few cracks in it. "Stupid fork…" he muttered under his breath.

A/N: Alright, now it's rumor patrol time. Next episode: "The Big Story". Has something about Albedo and Azmuth. I didn't catch the full summary. Found it kind of unimportant. The one after that though, GWEN AND JULIE ARE GOING TO ANODYNE! WHHHAAAA? And that's your Ben 10 rumor patrol. So review!

~Sky