Thanks so much to everyone who suggested some ideas for me. I think I know where I'm going now! One person PM'd me with an idea that got the wheels turning in my mind. A lot of you reviewed and I answered via PM. I'm so glad that everyone is so willing to help me further this fic! I think I know what to do now. It shall not end yet! By the way, I have an important announcement at the top of my profile. I'm hoping that a lot of people will read it because it is MUY important. That's right. I just spoke Spanglish like a boss. XD
laureas: Your review was so helpful, that I PM'd you! Thanks!
Ptroxsora: Don't worry, I think I know where to go now.
Pergjithshme: I know, right! *fangirling like crazy*
Kore-Proserpina: Okay, I'll be eagerly awaiting your PM. :)
Patrick O'Loughlin: Aw, man, now would be the perfect time for me to know more about Superman! I grew up watching a couple of the movies, but I know so little that I'd have a ton of trouble with character and plot development. Thanks for your help, though, and I hope my PM was useful. :)
Irish-Brigid: Yeah, I see where you're going there. A couple of people have suggested that the Avengers go to aid the Jedi against the Separatists, but your point has definitely been made, in the sense that the Avengers have obligations elsewhere.
Raychaell Dionzeros: I copied and pasted your name so there's NO WAY I'll ever get it wrong again! :D Anywho, I might consider that. Sounds like a good idea. Tony DID allude to having a party. Maybe near the end, I'll have that happen as a sign-off.
NARUTO SON OF ARTEMIS: Nooooo. O_O Mental image, mental image, mental image! *cringes and stares at pictures of Loki to wash away mental image* Okay, I'm good now. No idea is silly, like I said before, but I seriously hope you were joking there. XD I'm not doing a pairing fic, so…yeah.
AaylaKit: Okay! I'll see if I can do that. That'd be SO FUNNY if Boba went after Fury. Hmm…this is the Clone Wars era so Boba would be…about twelve. Wookieepedia says that he was thirteen when the Clone Wars ended, so he'd be roughly eleven or twelve.
11SnowLeopard11: That makes two requests for Boba Fett. Looks like our bounty hunter friend is going to make an appearance! Though not in this chapter, he will show up soon, so keep a look out!
Cassy27: Tony is fun to do, and it feels great to know that I'm nailing the serious and humorous sides of him. Ah, Thor and Loki. *shakes head sadly* Someday, but not today. As I said in the PM, I love your idea.
Whip-Owl: I'm not sure if you'll get this far, but I figured I'd reply to your review anyway, even though I PM'd you. I can't really see you enjoying it if you don't know who Loki is, but who knows? You might still like it. :)
chris: I did consider that, yes. A couple of people gave me that idea, but Irish-Brigid made a good point. Every single one of the Avengers have obligations elsewhere, whether it be Asgard, Earth, or S.H.I.E.L.D. Plus, Banner would NOT be able to survive the flight there. Thanks for the idea, though, and I did think it through.
Hours passed in which Loki stood alone with his thoughts. Something inside him kept him from succumbing to sleep. Why was it so difficult to simply lie down and let his worries wash away into dreams? It would be so easy, yet…it would make him so vulnerable. Stop it, he scolded himself. There was no one in this building that he did not trust…right? Wait a minute. If his life was on the line, would he trust the other Avengers to save him? What if something happened, in which they could simply bargain his life in exchange for peace? Would they do it? Though he wanted to say that they would never do such a thing, the realistic part of his mind questioned that.
"They all have a reason to hate me," he whispered. "Why did they choose to accept me?" Was this a trick? A sick joke? He, the god of lies and mischief, should be able to detect it. He knew that he could easily pull a trick even more elaborate than this. "The threat has passed. Will they simply cast me aside now that they have no more use of me?"
"Impossible to see, the future is," a new voice said. Loki whipped around to see the small green alien that had sat on the Jedi High Council. "Clear your mind, you must, if it is yourself you seek."
Loki blinked, stunned, then recovered by getting defensive. "What do you know?" he asked. "You know not of my past. You know not of my parentage. Who are you to walk in here and tell me how to 'find myself'? In fact, how did you even get here in the first place? I thought that all of the Jedi had arrived already."
Yoda chuckled. "So eager, you are, to seek answers to your questions. If open your mind, you do, then answer them yourself, you can."
"I do not have time for philosophy and ambiguity," Loki said impatiently. "I have better things to do."
"Like stand in front of a window and question your existence, hmm?" Yoda's intense green eyes seemed to see right through Loki, who had only felt this sensation from the Gatekeeper, Heimdall. It unsettled him.
"I would appreciate it if you stopped prying," he said. "My business is my business. I do not appreciate your interference, nor did I ask for it. If I needed or wanted your help, I would have requested it."
Yoda shook his head. "Much to learn, you have, about patience and honesty and trust."
"I trust no one but myself," Loki said stubbornly. "I am the only person that would not betray me."
"Oh? Then closed-minded, you are, Loki." Yoda took a few steps closer, using his gimer stick for support. "Crucial, it is, to put your faith in others. Only then will you alleviate your pain and anger and bitterness. Keeping it to yourself…only hurt you, it will."
This little guy was really getting on Loki's nerves. Who did he think he was? The wisest being in the realms? "Do you really think that my problems would just melt away if I confide in you? It's not that simple!"
"But help you, I can."
"How?"
"Helped many, I have. When over eight hundred years old you are, much, you know. Though room for improvement, there always is. Much to learn, I have, though much, I have, to teach you."
"Can you please speak normally?" Loki begged. "You are difficult to follow."
Yoda laughed again. "Listen with your mind, you must. Always. If tell me your problems, you do, then help you, I may."
Loki turned toward the window again. "You may have lived over eight hundred years," he said, accepting this fact as if it was a trivial matter, "but I know that you would never understand the depths of my life." Yoda leaned forward, seemingly eager to hear what it was that Loki was referring to. "You try being the younger of two siblings, always wondering why the eldest was the favorite. You try finding out that your sibling isn't really your sibling, and your father isn't really your father!" He whirled around to face Yoda again. His voice rose. "You try being lied to your whole life, and then tell me that you can help me!"
There was silence between them for several moments. Loki was breathing hard, his head spinning from the rant. He realized too late that he had had a slip of the tongue. Yoda had tricked him. He had used all the right words to get him to talk. He had fallen into the trap.
"Meditate on this, I will," Yoda said. "Alone time, you need. Leave you in peace, I will." He walked away slowly and made his way toward another room, where he could sit in silence and reflect.
Loki placed his head in his hands, completely lost. If Yoda breathed to a soul that he had expressed weakness…sentiment…then he would deny it. But who would they believe? A wise old Jedi Master, or the god of mischief? He had to get away, but how? Where? The Avengers would surely notice his absence and suspect that something was up.
"Loki," a voice whispered. Loki focused on making his expression neutral before turning to see who had addressed him. It was Anakin Skywalker. "Tell me—why do trust no one?"
"I will not let myself be hurt again," he said simply. "I will not give in to sentiment. It is not my nature to emote." This was a lie. He had emoted so many times that he was embarrassed to count. But that was the old Loki. The new one would never express his pain and suffering to others. He could not let himself feel the pain over again.
"Sit down," Anakin urged.
"I'd rather not."
"Very well, then. I'll come to you." Anakin walked over to stand beside the Asgardian. Both gazed out the window for a long time before Anakin spoke again. "You know, I get what you're feeling there." Before Loki could object, Anakin raised a hand. "Let me finish." Loki nodded for him to continue. "You struggle with the anxiety that the Avengers don't trust you. That they'll betray you at any time. Right?"
Loki narrowed his eyes. How did this man know what he was feeling?
"I'll take that as a yes. Anyway, believe it or not, you're not alone." He let out a sigh and looked into Loki's eyes. "The Jedi don't trust me any more than the Avengers trust you."
Loki shook his head. "Impossible. Did you try to take over an entire realm? Did you fight each and every one of them in battle? I think not."
"No, I didn't," Anakin agreed. "But the Jedi see something in me that they don't like, and they judge me for it. Ever since I was a boy, Yoda saw darkness and fear in me. That's the thing about Yoda; he always knows what you're thinking and feeling." He paused a moment. "Maybe I should go back further. You don't know this, but most Jedi are identified at a young age. They're brought to the Jedi Temple to be trained, and Yoda trains them before they receive mentors." Loki nodded. He did not see the significance in this, but he decided that he had nothing to lose at this point, and allowed Anakin to humor himself by continuing. "I was not like the other kids."
This got Loki's attention. "You weren't?" He thought back to his life as a child. He never understood why Thor was always in the spotlight. Every Asgardian youth wanted to play with him. All the girls would stare at him. He was the golden child, while Loki sat in the shadows, reading a book or watching the others train at a distance. He surrounded himself with knowledge, but it was not enough to get accepted. While the Warriors Three, Sif, and Thor would let him hang with them sometimes, he always had the feeling that he was disliked by his adoptive brother's friends. In fact, they downright hated him. He was not blind to this.
"No, I wasn't," Anakin said, seeming to see the memories in Loki's eyes. "I was a slave."
Loki was jerked out of his reminiscence immediately. "A what?"
"You heard me. For years, my mother and I served as slaves on a desert planet called Tattooine. Most Jedi do not know their parents, but I had an attachment to my mom." Loki knew how that felt. He had felt an attachment to Frigga all his life, and had been shattered to learn that she was not his real mother. "I was freed by a Jedi named Qui-Gon Jinn. He died soon after and, years later, I lost my mother, too." Anakin glared bitterly at the ground. "I couldn't save her."
Loki took a moment to drink this in, then asked, "Why are you telling me all of this?"
"Because I see so much of myself in you. You're a great liar and you love to play tricks and take risks, yet—when it comes to your emotions—you are afraid to take risks. You do not want to be hurt again. You know what it feels like to have everyone distrust you. You work so hard to earn that trust, but it's never good enough. You fear that your life is meaningless to everyone else."
Loki backed away. "How do you know this?" Anakin was putting his inner turmoil to words, which was a bit disturbing to say the least.
"Because I feel it, too," the Jedi Knight said simply. "I may never know how it feels to be the younger sibling, the one that is always second-best, but I see how you feel. I might as well be the adopted one, because I'm kind of the odd one out here. All the other Jedi had the same upbringing except for me. No, I'm not going to ask for your sympathy, nor am I going to start a sob-story session. But remember this: at least one person in this universe can relate to you." He turned and walked toward his room, then faced Loki again. "Think about it."
Loki did think about it. For the rest of the night, he thought about it. He was still thinking about it when the sun rose. He kept his gaze fixed on the city, though he heard Tony Stark's approach before the man spoke. "You're up awfully early. Did you sleep at all?"
"Of course," Loki lied. "I fell asleep on the couch there." He knew that he would be caught if he claimed he had slept in the bed, considering it was completely untouched.
"Did you sleep well, though? That's the real question."
"Why would you think otherwise?"
Tony shrugged. "Just the fact that you seemed unwell last night. Thor was worried sick about you and I had to promise him that I'd force you to rest. Considering you typically do what you want, I didn't even try to keep that promise."
Mortals. Their lies are so trivial. "I see. Well, I'm fine, as you can very well notice."
Tony studied him. "You don't look so fine." He pushed a button, transforming the window into a mirror. "Look at yourself."
Loki did so. He was thinner and paler than usual, with dark circles under his eyes. He looked sick and tired and stressed all rolled into one. "It's the battle," he said, lying again. "It has taken a toll on me."
"I see that," Tony said. "Why don't you lie down?"
Loki did not want to lie down, though his body tried to tell him that it was for the best. I have too much to think about to simply lie down, he thought. Oh no. If Thor saw me like this… If Thor saw him like that, he would surely fuss over him. That was the last thing he wanted. Attention. He did not want to be the center of attention. "Please do not indicate your suspicions to Thor," he begged. "I cannot let him stress over me."
Tony raised an eyebrow. "You're a strange person, Loki," he said. "I can't quite figure you out. Maybe if I was a Jedi I'd have more luck."
Loki snorted. "No one can figure me out," he said. Lie.
"Fair enough." Tony gestured toward the couch. "It won't bite, you know."
Reluctantly, Loki walked over to the couch and sat. When Tony still stared at him expectantly, he finally decided to humor the mortal and lie down. It felt good, though it did not ease the tension in his muscles, nor did it relax his thoughts.
"Was that so hard?" Loki wanted to wipe that smirk off of Stark's face, but he was too weary to do so. "I'll get you a drink or something. Are you hungry at all?"
"I'm—"
"If you say you're fine, then I'll hit you," Tony said, half-joking.
Loki tried a new approach. "Thank you for your hospitality, but right now, all I need is to be alone."
"That won't be easy, Princess," Tony remarked. "The rest of the gang should be up soon, and this is kind of the lounge area. If you want to be alone, you could go to that room over there." He gestured toward the room that he had offered Loki the previous night.
"Much appreciated." Loki pulled himself to his feet and was surprised to find how shaky he was. What was eating away at him to make him so…weak? Perhaps it was fear that—no. He refused to even consider that. It would only drive him to madness. If I'm not already halfway there, he added silently. Maybe it was just the fact that he needed sustenance. "If you need me, I will be in there," he told Tony. Steeling himself, he made his way over to the room.
"Loki?"
Damn. Loki had bumped right into Thor. Now things would get complicated. Cue the questions.
"Loki, what's going on?" Thor looked him up and down. "You look awful!"
"Thanks," Loki responded sarcastically. "Considering we just battled two armies, it's safe to say that you do not look so good yourself."
Thor waved a hand to indicate that it was not important. "I have battle wounds. They will heal. You have some, too, but that's not my concern right now. You look sick."
"If I look sick, then perhaps you should leave me alone," Loki shot back.
"We don't have time for arguments," Fury said, stepping out of his room. "Right now, we need to discuss the aftermath of the battle. Stark, have JARVIS wake the rest of them up. I think it's high-time we held this meeting. We've been putting it off for long enough."
Tony looked at the time. "Isn't it awfully early to be bothering a group that just finished fighting a battle? Don't you think they need more time to rest? Come on; find your humanity."
Fury rolled his one eye. It looked rather amusing to Tony, who refrained from laughing by putting a finger contemplatively over his mouth. The Director of S.H.I.E.L.D did not miss this gesture. "Just get them up, Stark. They can rest after we deliberate our next move."
"Roger that. Hey, JARVIS! Get the gang up, will you? I've got pancakes!"
Loki and Thor were silent. The former was wondering why Midgardians did so much discussing and so little action. The latter was worried for his brother. Loki did not fail to notice this, and he kept Thor quiet with a warning glare.
Soon, everyone was gathered in the main area, eating pancakes and enjoying themselves. The prospect of eating made Loki's stomach churn uncomfortably, but he managed to force one down so as to not look suspicious. He hated to admit it, but he felt slightly better physically after eating. Perhaps the combination of lack of sleep and lack of sustenance were major contributors to his weakened state.
"Okay, team," Tony said, "what's the plan?"
"First of all, we need to make sure that the threat is completely gone," Steve said. "We also need to reassure the citizens that everything is safe now, which will come after the first course of action, in which we ensure their safety." He paused thoughtfully. "Not to mention that the press will be all over us soon."
"I can handle them," Tony said. "You leave the publicity to me."
Fury narrowed his eye. "Do not disclose our secrets, Stark," he warned.
"Moi? Did you really think I was going to—really, I—you—you don't trust me." He pretended to look hurt. "All joking aside, I do know how to deal with these people. It's an art that not all of you have mastered. Just trust me."
"Very well. I trust that you will not let us down in that area." Fury looked from one Avenger to another, and then at the Jedi. "Any thoughts?"
"Dooku escaped our grasp," Anakin said fiercely.
"That'll be a major blow to the Republic," Obi-Wan agreed. "We've got to find him, so we'll probably be departing from your planet soon. Once we know for sure that you are safe, we'll most likely be on our way."
Loki and Anakin did not have to look at each other to know that they were thinking the same thing. Who would they confide in now? Not that Loki needed the Jedi Knight, per say, but it was nice to have him around.
"It's settled, then," Mace said. He glanced at Yoda, who nodded agreement. The ancient Jedi Master's gaze flickered briefly to Loki, which surprised Mace. "We'll do a sweep of your Milky Way galaxy to ensure that the threat is completely gone," the Korun continued, concealing his reaction to Yoda's surreptitious glance. "Once we're satisfied, we'll go back to the war that threatens our own galaxy."
Fury does not smile often, but he allowed the hint of one to show on his face. "Thank you, Master Windu. We are appreciative of your service and hope that an alliance between yourselves and our planet will be made possible. We also hope that your interference will not be needed here again."
Plo nodded. "We can hope," he said, "because we are strained enough as it is. We were pleased to aid you, however."
Fury was about to speak, but JARVIS disrupted his train of thought. "Sir, I have a message from the S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters. Agent Maria Hill needs to speak with you, and wishes for your presence right away."
"I'm on my way." He turned to Natasha and Clint. "Could you two take over, please?" he requested.
"Of course," Barton said.
Fury nodded appreciatively and left for a helicopter transport. After he left, the group spent several minutes in silence, each feeling content to simply sit together. Everyone in the room was comfortable except for Loki, who was continuously on edge. He tried to hide it, though. He was good at that.
"Well, why don't we start by—" Steve began, but was interrupted by a bang on the door.
"Is Fury back already?" Natasha asked, confused. He had only been gone a few minutes.
Loki wasn't sure why, but he felt a sense of dread creeping up his spine at the sound. He stared at the door, half-expecting something sinister to be lingering behind it. Please just be Fury, he silently begged. He hoped that it was the Director, coming back to pick something up that he'd forgotten, but, somehow, everything inside him said that that wasn't the case. Slowly, he stood up and eased behind the couch in case he had to bolt.
The bang came again. Before anyone could react, the door was kicked open. More like smashed. "Hey, what's the big idea?" Tony demanded. "Those are expensive, you know—"
A large figure stepped into the light. "My apologies," he said in an ominous voice.
Loki's eyes widened and he found himself backing away, his entire figure trembling in terror. One word escaped his lips; one word that paralyzed him with fear.
"Thanos."
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars or the Avengers or a lot of the ideas that were in this chapter and will be in chapters to come.
AN: I'm so mean. So, I'd like to thank laureas for the idea of the interaction between Loki and Yoda. Also, laureas had the idea of Anakin and Loki confiding in each other. I'd also like to thank Novagon and Cassy27 for the idea of Thanos coming in. AaylaKit and 11SnowLeopard11 gave me another idea that will be present in my next chapter. Thanks, guys!
