Chapter 5

'Okay,' Lily thought to herself sitting up in her bed, 'I can do this. Just because I can't be with him doesn't mean I can't still be his friend. I can control my emotions. I can keep my feelings in check. I'm independent. I'm a Slytherin. I can do anything. I can totally talk to Fred, and sit with him, and watch him do silly jokes with George, and listen to his voice without wanting him. It'll be fine.'

She opened the curtains around her bed and jumped out eagerly. She shared a dorm with her other three best friends Cassidy Larmond, Leigh Jackson and Tina Raven. Cassidy was a year younger, while Tina and Leigh were the same age.

Tina was still asleep and Leigh was in the bathroom first, as she was every morning. Cassidy was already in the common room. Lily jumped onto the end of Tina's bed.

"Tina! It's time to wake up!" She sang. Tina sat up and rubbed her eyes, "Get up! No more dreaming about a certain blond Slytherin boy!" She smirked and ducked from a pillow that Tina threw at her. She poked her tongue out and bounded off the bed. Leigh stuck her head out of the bathroom.

"Draco! You're so beautiful!" Leigh teased.

"Draco! Your face is like an angel!" Lily joined in.

"Draco! I love you!"

"Draco! Why don't you want me?"

Tina dragged her blanket over her head. The two girls continued to imitate Tina and her love, for Draco Malfoy, when he came into their dorm.

"Why do I keep hearing my name?" He asked with a slight grin. Tina saw the look in Lily's eye when he asked. This made her leap out of bed and run to Lily.

"Because Tin-" she began before Tina covered Lily's mouth with her hand, "m mmph phu,"

"Tina what?" Draco had a smug, yet interested, look on his face.

"Tina nothing," she smiled sweetly. Draco nodded slowly and left the dorm. Tina let go of Lily and threw another pillow. This one didn't miss.

Lily walked into the bathroom. She took a deep breath and looked in the mirror. She brushed her teeth and put her hair into a ponytail.

'I can do this.' She thought again. After getting changed and putting on her robes and gathering her books, she left to the Slytherin common room. She stood in front of the portrait.

'I can do this, Fred's not that great.'

She spoke the portrait password and the portrait opened. Fred was waiting outside her common room, the same way he did every Friday because they have their first class together. He smiled and all of Lily's past thoughts were rendered useless.

'Oh, fuck! Never mind.'

The portrait opened slowly, Fred's heart leapt in hope that it was Lily. It wasn't. It was just Natalie Lawrie and Phoebe Kliem, whispering away to each other.

Where was she? What was taking her so long? She always met him out the front of her common room on Fridays. Did she forget? No, she wouldn't forget about him.

'I can do this,' he thought to himself, 'I see her every day. Why should I act any differently just because I feel the urge to snog her every time she flips her hair out of her face…or laughs…or says my name…or breathes.'

He sighed in defeat; he didn't think he could do this. The portrait once opened again. Fred couldn't help but smile, because standing there was fair skinned, green eyed, black haired beauty.

"Hey Lil," He said.

"Morning Freddie," she smiled.

"I like your hair today," he said noticing it wasn't down, like it normally was. Lily's cheeks flooded pink. He noticed that too. "It looks nice"

"Thanks," they gazed at each other for a few seconds, "we should, uh, get to class," she said breaking the stare. Fred nodded and they started walking.

'You bloody git!' Fred thought, 'why didn't you just kiss her!'

'Lily you're an idiot!' She thought walking silently with Fred; he was lost in thought too, 'way to keep a lid on your feelings! Staring at him like a love-struck puppy! Real smart he'll never notice! By Merlin, you're a fucking moron!'

She and Fred snapped out of their thoughts and looked at each other. They both smiled then looked away, mentally crucio-ing themselves for being so hopelessly pathetic. They sat together in class, but neither of them spoke. Partially because no one else was speaking, but mostly because they were both afraid they'd say something stupid.

They felt awkward and uneasy, but did nothing about it. Fred thought about telling her a story, but when he thought it over in his head, he realised it was a stupid story. Not funny at all.

Lily thought about discussing the weather. Isn't that what muggles did when there was an awkward silence? She looked out the window and decided there was no point in talking about the weather. It was England; the weather was always the same.

They were both relieved when it was time for their next class, although it wasn't much easier. Lily couldn't get Fred off her mind. It was like there was a whirlpool in her head and it sucked in everything that wasn't Fred-centric. It was exactly the same with Fred.

Lily wanted a distraction, so at lunch, she went to the library to actually study. And she fully intended to, until she saw the twins doing the exact same thing. They were already there with a huge book in front of them. She sat down in front of them with a smaller book.

"What's this?" George acted surprised, "is the infamous Lily Scott studying?"

"What? No boy-toy of the week?" Fred joked. It hurt him to say it, but he thought it was better to act as if he only saw her as a friend.

Lily faked a smile in return.

"It's not that weird," she defended.

"Yes it is," The twins chorused.

"Fine," she said scanning the library before spotting a Ravenclaw 7th year looking at her. She flashed him a brilliant smile that made the blond boy blush. She stood up and went over to him.

"Hi," she said in a bubbly voice. She looked back at Fred and George who were watching in amusement.

"Hey," he replied smoothly.

"I'm having a little trouble with my charms homework, and I thought that maybe you could help me," she battered her eyelashes and the boy practically fell at her feet.

"Sure, give me your books and I'll give it a look-over," he gushed.

"Thank you, that's so sweet of you. You know, I just realised that I don't know your name"

"I'm Mackenzie Mortier,"

"I'm Lily, I have to go back and to my friends now," she said pointing behind her at Fred and George, "but you're welcome to join us,"

"I'll be there in a minute,"

She pranced back to the table.

"Happy now boys?" she smiled. George beamed from ear to ear. Fred had a happy face on, not letting Lily see how hurt or jealous he was.

"Well done mate! That was impressive," George exclaimed.

"Yeah, it was great," Fred said so convincingly that it felt like a stab to Lily. It was weird, but Lily felt…guilty. She had no feelings whatsoever for the boy, but she still planned on stringing him along. She shrugged it off when Mackenzie, as promised, sat beside her.

She smiled at him with all the charm she could muster. He smiled back, looking proudly smug. And Fred, well he just glared at the Ravenclaw senior sitting beside his girl.