Set in season 4. Everything up until Cuffed is fair game, included Killshot. I thought about skipping over it but I think having it as a background as well could be useful, so...

Disclaimer: I do not own Castle or any of the Andrew Marlowe characters. A girl can only dream.

Castle knew it would be a bad bay when he reached the address Beckett had texted him an hour earlier. She'd normally call, or have either Esposito or Ryan phone him to tell where to join them but it only had gotten a succinct text message at 6:10.

'Cold one, already on my way with Espo.'

And then, at 6:11, before he had time to reply, another bing had him reach quickly for his phone. 'Sorry. 42nd and Lexington.'

It wasn't like her to forget to give him the address because if she hadn't wanted him there, she wouldn't have contacted him at all. Now that Castle was standing in the parking lot and surrounded by police cars, CSU trucks and several members of different media, he understood.

A shooting range.

The murder victim had been shot dead in a shooting range. Castle didn't lose time and made his way through the cops and curious civilians trying to take a peek at the crime scene, canvas officers pointing him towards Beckett and her team.

He fought the desire to cringe at the random fire shots echoing through the place; apparently they still hadn't closed the whole range. Castle frowned and picked up the pace, itching to get to Beckett while trying not to worry too much about what being could be doing to her, the memories of her previous breakdown still fresh in his mind.

Castle slowed down when he reached the west part of the range and saw that the place was crawling with cops, his eyes sweeping the area to find her. Relief and surprise washed over him when he finally spotted her standing next to Esposito and seemingly in a quiet discussion with him.

Esposito saw him first and waved him over, Beckett glancing briefly over her shoulder as Castle joined them. "Hey."

"Mornin', detectives." Castle greeted them, forcing a smile as he quickly but thoroughly looked at his partner for any sign of PTSD. Beckett noticed and narrowed her eyes at him but said nothing and instead brushed past him to go over where Ryan was talking with Lanie.

"How is she?" Castle asked when she was out of hearing distance, turning to Esposito for his answer.

The Latino detective's gaze followed his partners' movement before it shifted to the M.E., where it lingered longer than it should. "Good. I swear bro, I wouldn't lie to you about that and you know it. She's a little jumpy and short-tempered but so far we're far from how she got last time."

Castle nodded absently, trusting his friend's judgement in the matter. "Okay, good. So, what do we have here?"

"Nineteen year-old female, GSW to the chest. She also presents signs of blunt force violence, as if she had gotten into a fight before time of death." Esposito detailed as he and the writer left their spots to join the others, Castle stopping by Kate's side. "I didn't have time to bring you coffee, sorry."

Beckett turned to him and offered him a strained yet genuine smile. "It's okay, we can stop on our way back." In truth Kate was almost relieved Castle has showed up empty handed. She could still feel her hands shaking slightly and if she had managed to hide it so far, having to carry a tall cup of coffee would have given her away.

She knew by the looks everyone kept giving her when they thought she wasn't looking that they were all expecting her not to handle the situation well; she knew they were all waiting for the breakdown to arrive, just like last time, but she made sure it was unlikely to happen. The random fire shots were slowly getting to her; not as badly because she was wearing special earplugs, hidden under her loose blondish curls, but still she couldn't wait for the whole shooting range to be closed and to get out of there.

Castle seemed to feel her restlessness and Kate startled when she felt his hand on her elbow but relaxed quickly under his touch. She fought her instincts that told her to free her arm and instead let herself feel the heat radiating from her partner's touch, warming her ever cold bones.

She had denied those feelings for so long, forcefully pushing them away in a fear of opening herself up to something she wasn't ready for, that now Kate wasn't sure how to let them make their way back to her heart.

During her last session her therapist had suggested that she if she wasn't comfortable with initiating comfort touches with a person, namely a certain famous writer, she should at least try and accept them whenever it came from him. Kate had stared Dr. Burke down for several minutes after he had mentioned it, thinking he had grown crazy. She knew confessing about having felt safer when she and Castle held hands during the time they ended up being cuffed together would come back and bite her in the ass.

It hadn't been easy at first. There wasn't much physical contact between the two because Castle knew she was extra jumpy ever since the shooting, but Beckett had been determined to try. She had meant it when she told Burke she was ready to let go and move on and, as terrified as she was, she was a fighter, not a quitter.

It had begun by a brush of their fingers as Castle handed her her morning coffee, Kate moving her fingers slightly so they would touch the writer's. A few days later it had evolved into a graze of their hips when they got into the elevator and she twisted sideways to press the down button. After Castle seemed to have caught on, his touches became more and more frequent, as well as diverse: a brush of his fingers against hers, a hand to her shoulder or her arm...and Kate found out she enjoyed them, more than she would ever admit.

It was now three weeks after the tiger case and, if Castle was getting bolder with his attempts of getting closer to her, he was still cautious and overly patient. His more daring move to date had been to put his hand on her lower back as he joined her in the break room two days ago.

They had just closed a tough case and she had been lost in thought when Castle had came up behind her and stood by her side, hesitating a moment before his hand found her back, and rubbed soft circles down her spine before resting his hand on her lower back.

And she'd let him get away with it.

Just like she was currently letting him get away with his hand on her elbow, but only because the way they were standing blocked the gesture from everyone to see. Insanely attuned to the writer's body, she tensed when Castle's hand on her tightened before letting it go completely, the writer moving forward, a deep frown on his face. "What's wrong? Castle?"

Castle was crouched beside the victim, his eyes staring hard at something the others obviously had missed. "Um, nothing. I-I thought I saw something but it must've been my imagination."

No one believed him but didn't press further. Except for Beckett. "Are you sure? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"No, no I'm fine. Is there any leads?"

Lanie exchanged an odd look with the detectives and shook her head. "Bullet wound seems to be from a .38 and she was shot at point blank. She doesn't have any ID on her."

"CSU found an abandoned gun over to the south field, they're taking it to ballistics, hopefully it'll be a match." Ryan announced as he hung up his phone. "There's so many case shells around, I thought people were supposed to pick up after themselves."

"They're supposed to, but maybe they were dropped on purpose. Slow down the process of finding the right one." Esposito suggested, stepping closer to the body and the guys as well.

Castle glanced between the two, curious. "Like if the murderer couldn't find the bullet's case shell so he covered his trace by dumping a bunch of them in the area? But then why would he drop the gun on the other side of the shooting range?"

"I don't know," Ryan admitted, "that's why we need to find the girl's ID before we can move any further. I think we're ready to move her though. Beckett?"

Kate heard voices but they were dampened by the sound of her blood rushing to her head. The medication she had started taking after the sniper case, as part of the treatment her therapist had advised her to go under, had begun to help in the last couple of weeks, but they weren't miracle pills. They were enough to take the edge off, but now the edge was starting to get the best of her because she had just realized why Castle had been thrown off when he saw the body.

She hadn't notice at first, with all the blood and the complete different clothing style, but she could see it now. The long, chocolate wavy hair, strong cheekbones yet delicate features...The victim looked like the younger version of herself, and now she couldn't get the resemblance out of her mind.

Esposito was the one closest to Kate so he was the first to notice. His mind reeled when he saw the look in her eyes, knowing she was starting to feel the pressure of the case again. He knew better than to touch her so he stepped in front of her and called her name loudly and clear. "Beckett."

Kate snapped out of her thoughts to find herself eye to eye with her colleague's concerned face. He didn't say the words because he knew how she'd react if he did. Forcing herself to calm down she took a deep breath and turned to face three sets of cautiously neutral eyes. "Lanie, you can take the vic back to the morgue. Ryan, you and Espo go and take statements from people around, anyone who may have witnessed or heard something, see if anything pops out. Castle and I will put the murder board up and run the vic through the missing persons' files."

Knowing better than to argue, everyone spread out to do their job, leaving a nervous Castle with an even more anxious Beckett. They walked to the car in silence, only the sound of their breathing filling the space once they were inside. "Kate..."

"Just, just give me a minute, okay?" She asked him, glad her voice sounded steadier than she felt in reality. Kate leaned back on her seat and closed her eyes, blocking Castle's intense stare on her. Her hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly her knuckles were turning white.

Kate was slowing getting her breathing back under control when a warm hand snaked its way between her fingers, gently prying them away from the wheel. The detective peeled an eye open and watched their joined hands, emotions swirling in her eyes. Unable to find her words she sighed, which made Castle squeeze her fingers tighter.

"I know." The man turned sideways in his seat so he could face her and gave her a small grin. "Take all the time you need."

The detective shot a look at her surroundings, noting that most of the people were gone or about to leave. Taking one last breath and feeling satisfied when it came easier than before, Kate relaxed in her seat and started the engine, taking back her hand almost regretfully back from Castle.

The writer noticed and he waited for the car to be at a red light to gently lay his hand on her thigh. She shot him a nervous look from the corner of her eye but didn't brush him off. She could do this. They could do this. "So. Coffee?"

Kate straightened on her seat and shot Castle a grateful smile. "Coffee."

"Here, give me your coat." Castle moved and gestured for Kate to remove her jacket as they entered the man's loft, watching her hesitate a second before shedding her black sheepskin coat and handing it to the man. She stood by the door awkwardly while her jacket and purse joined the rest of the family's outdoor clothes, the closet door closing making her feel as if it was closing on herself.

"Shall we?" Kate swallowed back a sigh and obediently followed the writer in the kitchen even though she was having second thoughts about accepting to come over to have dinner with him. But, as she remembered the day she had, she was dreading the idea of heading back to her apartment alone. Memories of what happened last time swirled through her mind, making her terrified of being alone.

The case wasn't as bad as the sniper one, but it was still feeling like hell. They had found the victim's identity soon after getting back to the precinct. Victoria Stanford, nineteen, NYU student, no known enemies. They had spent the day interrogating her family and friends but nothing had stood out, and the mystery of why the young woman had been found at a shooting range hadn't been explained yet.

It was about three when Beckett had snapped at Ryan. She hadn't mean to but by then she was tired, her head was throbbing and the concerned looks he kept sending her way had put her on edge, and him suggesting her to go get some rest had been the last straw. The look on his and Esposito's faces had the effect of a cold shower on her, and Beckett managed to mumble an apology, agreeing with the men before hastily grabbing her coat and leave.

Of course Castle was already waiting for her when she got out of the elevator, having run down the flights of stairs judging by the way he was panting and, somehow, succeeded in convincing her to come home with him. She could tell he had been as surprised as her when she accepted without too much of a fuss. But then again being alone in her apartment upset her more than being alone with Castle, so it had been an easy decision until now.

Kate was once again snapped back to reality when a hand landed on her shoulder and she found herself staring into gentle deep blue eyes. "Hey."

"Yeah, sorry. I guess I kind of zoned out."

Castle smiled easily as he released her and went back to the counter, where he kept his wine glasses. "Want a glass of wine?"

"Yeah," She answered quickly before frowning. Alcohol wasn't allowed with the medication she was in. 'Damn.' "Um, actually, no. No thanks."

Castle turned to her in surprise, one glass already half full. "You sure? I just got this Bordeaux 1980, it is to die for."

Kate clenched her jaw and lowered her eyes briefly before settling on anything but Castle. "I'm sure, thanks but no thank you."

"Would you prefer champagne? A beer or even cider, maybe?" Castle offered but stopped at the look on the detective's face. "Kate what is it,?" He was confused until something went through his mind and he almost choked on air, his face paling. Now that he thought of it, it had been a while since he had seen her drink anything. "Are...are you?"

Kate pursed her lips and was about to throw a random excuse in the air to explain when his words caught up with her."What? No! How could you even think that? I haven't been on a date in months!"

"How could I not? I just...I don't know, sorry." He said lamely, suddenly feeling foolish. "Does it have something to do with your father?"

"No." This was not how it was supposed to go. Castle had promised her there wouldn't be any heavy talk, or any talk at all if she didn't want to. He'd lured her into spending the evening with him because she thought it'd be better than to be stuck at home with her thoughts, but apparently she had been wrong.

She considered evading the question, hoping Castle wouldn't dare pushing the issue in case she'd make a run for it, but judging by the way he was looking at her he wouldn't go wouldn't without a fight."Where's the space and time you gave me last time this happened, Castle? I thought I heard you promising me a 'worry-free' evening. This", she waved between them, "is not exactly what I had in mind."

"I am not pressuring you into anything, Kate, and if you don't want to talk about it I won't press the issue." He softly told her as he closed the distance between them, close enough to discern the green speckles in her currently anxious sienna eyes, but without touching her. "But, if you want to talk, about anything and I mean anything, you know you can talk to me."

Castle remained silent as he witnessed the woman's inner war, hating the fact that he couldn't even guess how a simple question about a glass of wine could have degenerated into a sudden gripping fear of seeing the woman he loved flee out of his loft.

His fear came true when she seemingly came to a decision, turning on her heels to exit the kitchen. "Kate, wait!"

She was already close to the front closer when he joined her, his hand grabbing her wrist. "Please wait, okay? Don't go."

Kate lifted a confused gaze on him as she glanced from the closet and her restrained wrist. "What? I'm not leaving, Castle. I just needed my purse."

"Oh."

He watched closely the detective pulling her purse out of the closet and clutching it protectively, uncertainty still coming off in waves from her. "Kate, if you're not comfortable with-"

"No, it's okay."

Kate brushed past Castle and went to the living room, needing to be sitting for this. Her stomach was painfully tied in knots and she felt as if her heart was about to come out of her chest, but still she sat on the couch with the purse on her knees and waited for the writer to join her.

One last look at Castle was all she needed. His gaze was warm and kind, open to whatever she might throw his way, and for it she was grateful. A distant part of her brain made her realize that her therapist would be proud of her for taking another step forward, and suddenly she couldn't wait to be closer to the kind of person she ultimately wanted to be. She wanted Castle to be proud of her too.

Castle sat patiently next to the detective, their knees touching whenever one of them moved or shifted on the piece of furniture. He could see that Kate was still struggling with her decision so he gently reached and rest his hand on her knee, giving it a small squeeze. "Like a band-aid, remember?"

Kate nodded and, still seeming at a loss for words, chose to peek inside her purse, clearly looking for something in particular. She tensed when her hand finally found what she was looking for, as it stilled in the bag for a moment. One last nervous shot at the man before her and she slowly pulled her hand out of the bag and handed Castle something.

The writer took it without hesitation, noted it was two small half filled bottles. He stared at them in confusion until he read the label and realized Kate's name were on them. His eyes quickly searched for specific words, his mind going simultaneously blank and in overdrive as he read the names over and over, not recognizing them but knowing they were some kind of anti-anxiety medication.

The detective's behavior from the last weeks was suddenly making sense. The tiredness presented before she started showing a more subdue part of her weren't a mystery for Castle anymore. "I...how-um...when-"

"Right after the sniper case." Kate said, holding the writer's surprised gaze. She wasn't sure of what she was seeing in his eyes and it made her nervous. Castle was usually pretty easy to read but the fact that she couldn't now unnerved her.

Castle fiddled with the bottles, overwhelmed by the news. He was hurt that Beckett had kept it from him, but he couldn't be mad, on the contrary. He was glad, relieved that she decided she needed help and, most importantly, that is was okay to seek it. "I'm glad you went to see someone, Kate. You shouldn't have to keep it all in, so it's good that there's someone you can talk to."

Kate glanced at the ceiling, inwardly wincing for the hurt she heard in Castle's voice. That's what she was afraid of, that he'd take personally her decision to not confide in him and choosing to go to someone else. "Castle...Rick." She ushered and cleared her throat to find her voice. The man's serious gaze snapped back to her when she used his first name, something she rarely did. "I've been...I've been seeing someone for a while now. Not only since the case."

"Oh...when?"

"Since I came back to work and couldn't hold my gun without shaking. Since..since you've asked me to let go of my mother's case."

Castle's eyes widened at her admission, speechless. "Kate, I...I don't know what to say. I-I'm sorry."

Kate stared at him blankly, her head tilting on the side as she looked at him without blinking. "Why? I'm the one who decided to go back, Castle. You're not at fault here."

"But..."

"No, no but. I somehow had managed to convince myself I was ready to go back to work as if nothing happened, but I wasn't and you've actually helped made me realize that. You shouldn't be apologizing, Castle, if anything I should be the one thanking you."

Castle shook his head, stubbornly refusing to hear her. "I didn't do anything. I couldn't even help you with the sniper case, it was Esposito who did everything."

Kate rolled her eyes and let a smile grin grace her lips before speaking again. "Like you didn't breathed down Espo's neck and kept telling him to do something since I wouldn't let you? Yeah, I know it was you. Javi did the talking but I knew he did it because you asked him."

"And for the record, by not helping, you did help, more than you realize." She smiled genuinely at him at that, and the look on Castle's face made her heart twist with need and desire. His smile was gentle yet bright and his eyes...they were shining with so much pride Kate barely refrained herself to lean in and brush their lips together to get a taste of what being proud of someone would be like. Instead the moment was crushed as the detective let out a huge yawn, making Castle chuckle. "Sorry."

"It's okay. Do you want to take a nap before dinner?" Castle asked even as Kate stifled another yawn. "No, I'm good."

Castle knew better than to argue back, not if he wanted to get her to rest. "Oh!" He shouted out of nowhere, startling Beckett so bad their knees bumped against each other. "Jeez, Castle! Am I not jumpy enough as it is?"

"Sorry," He apologized guiltily as he reached out for the remotes and turned the tv and Blu-ray player on, "I just remembered the I popped the first Ice Age in last night but didn't get around to watch it. We could watch it now and make dinner after?"

Kate watched the movie menu on screen, transfixed. She had watched that movie countless times over the summer, wishing to have someone, whose name rhymed with 'hassle', to watch it with her.

Feeling the waves of high stress slowly leaving her body, Kate relaxed and made herself more comfortable on the couch. "Could we have popcorn with it?"

"Of course." Castle smiled brightly, enjoying the warm tone of the woman's voice as he nodded and left, coming back a few minutes later with freshly popped popcorn, bags of skittles and beverages. "There you go, popcorn for the lady."

"Thank you."

There was a small hesitation before Castle's voice piped in. "Come here."

Kate jumped and glanced at Castle, confused. "What?"

Castle sighed. "Hugs are great stress relievers, and so is watching a movie snuggled close to a friend."

Kate glared and gave the writer the evil eye as she pulled her legs under her. "We are not going to snuggle, Castle."

"Please?"

"No!"

"Why? This case is already taking its toll on me, so I can't even imagine what it's doing to you, even with...the help you're getting." The man cautiously advanced, "Can't we just relax in front of a movie and not have to worry for the rest of the day?"

"And we need to 'snuggle' for that to happen?" Kate raised an eyebrow, but she wasn't as dreadful looking as Castle had feared.

"Yes, I believe it is mandatory. Besides, I'm not doing this for you, really you'd be doing me a favor."

Kate snorted at that, clearly not believing him. "Come on Castle, you're a famous writer, can't you come up with a better excuse than that?"

"You know what, you're right, never mind." Castle grumbled as he stretched his legs on the coffee table and started the movie, choosing to ignore the detective. He wasn't mad, but he didn't have the strength to fight anymore. If she decided that today casual touches were off the table all of a sudden, arguing wouldn't help matters.

They watched the movie in silence, popcorn being eaten the only sound occasionally heard. Both kept glancing at each other when they thought the other wasn't looking but neither moved.

The movie had been going for less than ten minutes when Castle felt Kate shift beside him.

The woman put the half empty bowl of popcorn on the table and took a sip of her glass of water, aware that she was being observed. There was a slight hesitation as she leaned back in her seat, a few more seconds of shifting before Castle felt her head on his shoulder.

The man froze, not knowing what the boundaries were anymore at that exact moment. Could he snake his arms around her waist and hold her tight, was he supposed to wrap an arm around her shoulders, or wasn't he supposed to do anything?

Kate rolled her eyes and smirked at the thoughts that were most likely to be swirling in her partner's head. "Stop thinking and hold me, Castle."

Castle grinned like a five year-old on Christmas morning although he tried to hide it, and slowly moved his arm around the detective's waist to bring her closer to him. His hand stopped over Kate's stomach while the other took hold of her hand before it snaked higher to rest over her heart so he could feel her steady heartbeat.

The man swallowed back a moan when Kate shifted closer until she found a comfortable position, her contented sigh bringing a sharp twinge to his heart. Castle remained silent even if the only thing on his mind was how badly he wanted to kiss her and melt into her, to keep her safe from her inner demons. He had to remind himself that they were making progress, that rushing would only add fuel to the fire and ruin the moment. On that hopeful note, Castle made himself comfortable on the oversized couch and tightened his hold on the slender woman as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

Kate's body slumped against the writer's less than fifteen minutes later as she fell asleep in Castle's arms, her face unconsciously snuggling closer to his chest. Castle smiled and reached for the blanket on the back of the couch and covered her with it as she dozed, her body completely relaxed and at ease.

Castle always considered Kate Beckett to be a beautiful woman but, as she lay asleep in his arms, her face peaceful and almost serene, the man thought she was strikingly gorgeous, even with dark circles under her eyes and her still recovering, too thin body.

As Manny and Sid bickered on screen, Castle savored the sensation of Kate's proximity and warmth against him. Pushing his luck, he pressed a soft kiss down on her temple and got rewarded when she reacted with a contented sigh.

He could do this. They could do this, because there was nothing in this world he wouldn't do for her. He'd just have to prove it to her.

Sorry it's taken me so long to post, real life kind of got in the way. Graduating from college can do that to you, it seems. Updates should be more regular now that I have lots of free time on my hand. Merry Christmas!