Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy, therefore I make no profit.

A/N: My latest request is going to be the backdrop for many chapters to come. Hope that's cool Narcoleptic kitty. I've watched Despicable Me 1 & 2 a million times and I'm off to watch them again. Read, Review and, most importantly, enjoy.

He'd noticed for quite some time now, but had yet to do anything about it. He was partially worried that this was another weird thing happening to him. He was afraid that this wasn't natural, that this would maybe be the last straw and Mom would decide she couldn't handle him anymore. He could see quite plainly that Angeal and Genesis were different from him, and not just in appearance and skill level. Those he could explain. It was other things. Things that made Sephiroth feel like he was less superior to them.

So when Cass caught sight of his face at his next visitation and gave him the line of "what's up buttercup", Sephiroth spilled.

"I'm different, aren't I?" he said and not in his usual inquisitive way.

"Yes and no," Cass replied, "It depends on what you mean when you say you're different."

"It's not like before," Sephiroth said, "Something is wrong. I know it." Cass set down what she was doing and Sephiroth felt both worse and much, much better. They would figure this out together right now.

"What is wrong?" Cass asked sitting next to him. He tried to come up with the right words to describe it, but nothing was coming up. Mom noticed and reached for his hand.

"It's okay," she said, "just tell me, it doesn't have to sound nice. You know I don't care." He nodded and squeezed it gently.

"I'm...not normal," he said, "You...you said I'd be tall and strong, but...but I don't look like Genesis and Angeal. They're the same size, but they look..." He trailed off, but Mom nodded like she understood.

"And I've been breaking things on accident," he continued, "you remember last week with the glass and I've knocked down opponents in training harder than I meant to. I haven't hurt anyone yet, but I'm worried." At the memory he tried to loosen his grip, but Mom held him tighter.

"I'll take the risk," she said, "Is that it?" He shook his head, more conscious of how hard he was holding on to her hand.

"My voice gets funny sometimes," he said, "and my face is dirty a lot, even when I don't do anything and I don't know what I can do. I feel weird things sometimes and no one else seems to feel them either. Something's wrong with me and I think it's getting worse." He fell silent, waiting for Mom's rationale or her rejection. Now that it was out, he felt that her rejection would be a little overdramatic and wondered where on Gaia that thought had even come from.

"Good news and bad news," Cass said, "The good news is this is all normal. The bad news is this is all normal." Sephiroth nodded.

"This is supposed to happen," he said. Was this something Hojo would know something more about or that Mom would be able to explain? He hoped it was the latter. Hojo would make it more horrible than it already was.

"I've told you that you were growing up," Cass said, "This is a part of growing up." He nodded again.

"Boys at your age go through a really fast...developmental stage," Cass said, "Kind of like a transformation, but it's not as much fun." She paused.

"I should have prepared for this, but I've been procrastinating," she admitted, "This isn't a pleasant conversation for either side." He nodded.

"It's okay, I know." he said.

"I'll try to remember, but it's been a while since I've had to think about things like this," she said, "and it's different for boys than it is for girls."

"There was some other things I didn't say, should I tell you?" Sephiroth asked.

"Were they embarrassing for you?" she asked.

"...A little, but not too much," he admitted.

"If I said an increase in size was one of the first things to happen, would that make you feel better?" Cass asked.

"Yes," he said quickly.

"Okay then," she said, "first awkward hurdle." He nodded.

"Hair growing in new places?" she asked. He nodded again. "It's supposed to happen. Look at Angeal and Genesis if you're not sure. I think Angeal's started shaving. Mako might do it for you. It stunts hair growth in some cases." He nodded again. This was making him feel better.

"You're body is growing faster than it can properly adjust to it," Cass said, "You're going to just seem gangly and angley, but I promise you that it will adjust and you will be like Angeal and Genesis again. They're older and further along than you. I think Genesis might be done." He nodded.

"Your voice is changing," Cass said, "it's been getting deeper for a long time now. It's going to crack no matter what you do, but once it changes, you're done. Just roll with it. You can't help it.

"I don't know why you loose control of your strength," Cass said, "but if I had to guess I would say that it's your body trying to adjust to itself. You have a lot of mako in your system, I'm assuming your body is trying to find it's adequate level. It should even out like everything else does, but if it doesn't...we'll talk to Hojo and get something adjusted." He nodded. He was most worried about that, but when Mom put it that way it sounded livable.

"You're face isn't dirty," Cass said, "It just...it's just sort of greasy and oily. I can get you a face wash or something to help you if you think it's too bad."

"So this is all part of growing up?" he asked great relief.

"Yes," she said, "this is the last, and most difficult part. You'll be okay once you're done, but for now you just have to suffer through it. There is nothing wrong with you." He nodded and sat back.

"I feel stupid," Sephiroth said.

"You're not stupid," Cass said, "I just did a poor job of explaining it to you earlier."

"I could have figured out some of this stuff," he said.

"You could have," Cass said, "but you are also stuffed full of hormones that change the way you act."

"Like making you stupid when you were my age?" Sephiroth asked.

"Exactly," she said, "the very last point will be you pulling away to try and live your life on your own."

"Without you?" Sephiroth asked. Cass could detect the mild horror.

"Yes," Cass said, "but you will do it on you own terms when you are ready. I'm not kicking you out or anything."

"Oh," Sephiroth said, "but I can still come to you if I need you?"

"Absolutely," Cass said. He smiled, then frowned.

"You said this was different for girls," he said.

"Sephiroth you are opening a whole new and practically worse problem," Cass said, "We can stop now and you're mind can remain pure and innocent or we can get it over with now." He stopped to think.

"Let's just get it over with," he said. She nodded.

"What's the biggest physical difference between women and men?" Cass asked. He could name many.

"What can women do that men can't?" Cass tried again. That narrowed the field.

"Give birth?" he tried. She nodded, dreading the next approximate half hour.

"You're quiet," Tseng said as Cass sat down at her desk.

"I don't want to talk about it," she said sharply. He raised an eyebrow. Then he did something he never did, but the opportunity for revenge would probably never come up again. He pressed her. He pressed on the subject until she gave.

"Godammit Tseng," she said, "If you must know, I gave Sephiroth...the talk." It took him a moment to process what she meant. Oh...

"Like a health and safety talk or..." Reno asked while passing by.

"Puberty and intercourse," Cass said then shuddered, "It was bad enough when I was on the receiving end. It gets worse when you're the one giving it." Reno actually winced.

"I don't wanna know," he said and scampered away.

"Did he...did he understand?" Tseng asked carefully.

"I think," Cass said, "It's a lot of information that you don't want to hear, but you have to process anyway. I tried not to traumatize him, but there just aren't any nice words to put it in."

"What did your mother do?" Tseng asked.

"She threw a book at me and told me to read it," Cass said, "She didn't want to yell it at me, I guess. I wussed out and told him that he could look up things if he was still confused." She paused. "He asked questions. He tried being analytical about it and it didn't help at all."

"It's done though," Tseng noted sympathetically. Cass sighed and shuddered once more.

Cass buried her face in her hands. She couldn't do this. She couldn't answer these questions. But she had to, she had to find a way to answer them that would calm Sephiroth down.

"You said yesterday that it takes one man and one woman," Sephiroth said, "I know I had a mother, but I have to have had a father." He was pacing. Cass bit her lip because the easiest answers were ones that Sephiroth wouldn't want to hear.

"Yes," she said at last.

"Do you know who he is?" Sephiroth asked.

"I don't know," Cass said.

"Is it Hojo?" Sephiroth asked.

"I don't know Cass said.

"What are the chances?" Sephiroth asked, "You're a mathematician, what are the odds that Hojo is my father?"

"Sephiroth please calm down," Cass said. He stopped pacing and took deep breaths.

"Hojo was married to your mother," she said, "there is a very good chance that Hojo is your father. But there is no guarantee about that. Children take traits from their parents. You don't look like Hojo, but I don't know what your mother looked like so I can't be sure. I can't tell you Sephiroth. I don't know. I'm sorry." Sephiroth had calmed down significantly.

"I'm sorry," he said, "It doesn't matter."

"Sephiroth?" Cass said.

"I overthought," he said, "I overreacted. It doesn't matter. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Sephiroth," Cass said, "Sometimes little things take up a lot of our attention."

"I don't need him," Sephiroth said, "I made it this far. I don't know why I thought I did."

"Because you didn't want to be Hojo's son," Cass said. He paused and nodded.

"Does it matter?" he asked.

"Not to me," she said, "I've always cared about you, not who your parents were. You decide what's important for you." He nodded.

"It doesn't matter anymore," he said, "I said we were family now, so we're family. That's what's important." She thought his hug was a little tighter than usual, but said nothing and let him cling

"I'll always be your family," she said and she felt the slightest tension ease from his shoulders.

"No more crazed and debauched Midgar evenings?" Cass asked.

"No," Genesis said, "I'm done."

"Uh-huh," Cass said, "You'll be back once you forget how bad the hangover was."

"I don't think I will," Genesis said.

"You will," she did, "at least once, but you might be more cautious when you try again."

"Gods be that kind," Angeal said and smirked through Genesis's playful shove. Sephiroth looked on rather forlornly.

"S'matter with you?" Genesis asked with a rather convincing slum rat accent. Sephiroth shrugged.

"Teenage woes," Cass replied for him, "give him a minute he'll turn around." At that he gave a small smile. "See?" Cass said. He buried his head with a small blush.

"Dear lord I embarrassed you," Cass said. He turned redder and Angeal and Genesis laughed at him both slinging an arm around his shoulders.

"Since you can be embarrassed I think it's time I pass on a Durmont family tradition," Cass said.

"We have a tradition?" Sephiroth asked, suddenly composed.

"Not really," Cass said, "Mama and I used to play when I learned how to lie properly."

"Lie?" Angeal said.

"It's a card game," Cass said pulling out a deck, "It's called bullshit."

"I've heard of this," Genesis said with a grin.

"Good," Cass said. Five minutes later the cards were dealt and Sephiroth was frowning again.

"I'm not good at this," he muttered.

"You just beat me at chess," Cass said, "this is child's play compared to that."

"I can't lie to you," he said.

"Just keep a neutral expression and lay down a convincing lie," Cass said, "or tell the truth and make Genesis choke so I can win."

"I have two threes," Genesis said.

"Bullshit," Cass said.

"Dammit," Genesis breathed and took up the discarded pile. He frowned and turned to Angeal. "You lied about those aces," he said. Angeal smirked.

"And deduce what you know," Cass said, "Like I have all four threes." Sephiroth grinned.

"One four," he said. The table was silent. Once the pile had regrown Angeal laid down three cards.

"Three fives," he said.

"Bullshit," Sephiroth said. Angeal took the pile as Genesis snickered.

"I have four fives," he said laying them down.

"Bullshit," Cass said. He flipped them over.

"Ahh, well played," she said, "lying with the truth, greatest lie of all." He smiled again. It was a long and laughter filled night for all of them.