Thanks to my reviewers (especially whitealmond!) your feedback is much appreciated! Just a warning this chapter's a little darker than some, hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: Megamind, Roxanne, Hal and the gang are not mine. However the next fish I get I'm naming it Shiyounin!
Chapter 6
"Roxanne? Roxaroooooo..." a voice was calling her name, vaguely familiar but Roxanne couldn't put a name to it. She opened her eyes. At least she thought she did. It was too dark for her to be sure.
"Who's there?" she growled. Her head hurt and she was lying somewhere cold and uncomfortable. Her hands were tied together.
"I'm hurt Roxy. You've forgotten me already?" she could almost hear the sneer in the man's voice. Roxanne froze. She knew that voice now.
"Hal?" she said.
"That's great Roxy. Sorry but there's no prize tonight." Roxanne squinted as a flashlight was turned on. It probably wasn't that bright but her eyes hadn't adjusted well. They were in the back of the news van. Hal was sitting near the door. Roxanne was on the floor next to...
"Oh God. Barbie?" the girl was out cold on the floor. At least that's what Roxanne told herself.
"She'll be okay. I didn't hit her hard." Hal said. Roxanne glared at the little man.
"Fucking coward. What the hell are you doing here?" she sat up and tried not to wince at the pain in her head.
"I came to see you Roxanne. It's been so long. I really missed you." He said. She stared at him, very uneasy.
"Can't say the feeling is mutual Hal." He shrugged and smiled.
"Look I know we both said and did things we regret but I really think we can start over, you and me." Roxanne raised an eyebrow.
"Start over? Us?" She couldn't help but laugh.
"Well Megamind was kidnapping you for years and you've been fucking him for a while now, haven't you? We only had that one real fight, you could give me a second chance too couldn't you?"
"Hand yourself in Hal before someone gets hurt." She pulled at her restraints. Cable ties around her wrists. Crude but effective. She could get out of just about any knot in a rope these days but Megamind had never used cable ties. Hal laughed and got to his feet. His bulk made moving around the cramped back of the van difficult. Somehow he'd gotten even fatter in prison.
"See I don't think so Roxy. It's just you, me and Sleeping Beauty down there."
"Everyone knows where we are." She said, trying to look unfazed. He laughed.
"Were, Roxy. You were out of it for a while. I took the old van for a spin." Roxanne's stomach churned.
"You robbed the 7-11, and did the petrol runner. Why?" she realised.
"To get your attention. What happened? You used to be smart. Megamind fucked your brains out did he? He must be pretty good at it." Roxanne tried to look away from him but he grabbed her face and pulled her back to him. Her head throbbed and she flinched. He stroked her face, making her skin crawl. "Awww don't be like that. I won't let anything bad happen to you." He leaned in close to her. His breath smelled of day-old chips and soda. "I've been waiting for this for a long time." He brought his lips close to hers.
"I wouldn't put any part of you near my mouth Hal. Just some friendly advice." She said, baring her teeth. He pulled back hastily, and then scowled.
"Have it your way then. This could have been magical for both of us." He spat and then slapped her across the jaw. Her head snapped sideways and she saw stars.
"Asshole." She snarled. Her head throbbed harder. He grabbed at her jacket and tore the buttons off, only then realising he wasn't going to get it off her with her hands tied together.
"Fuck!" he shouted.
"You can't do anything right can you?" she laughed through the pain. "You're a pathetic little screw-up." He smacked her again and she tasted blood. She'd bitten her lip. "That's it. Hit the woman with her arms tied behind her back. Does it make you feel like more of a man?" He pushed her face-down on the floor of the van, tripping over Barbie's motionless body as he went.
"No but this does." He grabbed her skirt and pulled it up over her hips. Shit! She kicked and tried to pull away but he jammed his knee into her back and she cried out. "Briefs? I was hoping you were more of a thong kind of girl." She felt his hands grab at the waistband of her underwear and she couldn't stop the scream that erupted. He laughed and tugged at the elastic. "You go ahead and scream girl, there's no one around to hear..." There was a loud crash and the doors of the van were torn off their hinges. Hal gave a girlier scream than she did. Light (a headlight?) streamed into the back of the van and a bulky figure stood in front of it. "What the fuck?" Hal shouted and stumbled backwards. Roxanne pulled her skirt back down as best she could and threw herself out of the doorway, far less scared of the new intruder than of Hal. She landed badly on her shoulder and stole a glance back at Hal. He was standing against the wall of the van with his pants around his knees and a dark patch staining the front of his underwear. "Who the fuck are you?" he shrieked. The figure bent down and lifted Roxanne off the ground in a surprisingly gentle metallic grip.
"Konichiwa, Mr. Stewart." A sweet feminine voice rang out. Roxanne gripped onto the smooth enamel arm. Shiyounin? Hal pulled up his pants.
"She's mine you freak!" he shouted and launched himself out of the van at the robot. Shiyounin dodged and he stumbled past her. He whirled around and swung a punch at her. This time she stood still and took it, one eye-fin raised as there was a crunch and a howl from the man.
"Mr. Stewart, metal and enamel is being much harder than your hand. I suggest: you leave now." She said pleasantly. He tried to launch himself at her again and she dodged, then aimed a superb hook-kick at the back of his head. He stumbled and grabbed at his head.
Shiyounin placed herself between Hal and his target and stood in an exaggerated stance with her left hand extended in a knife-hand block. "You leave now." She repeated in the exact same tone of voice. He glanced from the fish to Roxanne and back again.
"This isn't over Roxy. I'll find you again. And you fish. Next time I'm gonna flush you down a fucking toilet." He ran off into the darkness. Shiyounin watched him go, activating a pair of infra-red goggles she held up to her dome.
"Mr. Stewart has left now Miss Ritchie. Are you okay?" she asked, and then caught her as Roxanne's legs gave way and she started shaking. "Come, sit." She led her over to the vehicle with the one headlight. The hoverbike, Roxanne realised. She sat down on the padded leather seat.
"Please Shiyounin, Barbie's in the back of the van." Shiyounin walked over to the van and retrieved Barbie.
"Sleeping but okay." She said. "We take her home?" Roxanne nodded, head spinning and not sure how this was going to happen.
Shiyounin took care of it all. She put Barbie in the front seat of the van next to Roxanne and strapped them both in, then parked the hoverbike in the back of the van. It was a tight squeeze and there were a few crashes (indicating, most likely, the destruction of several thousand dollars' worth of equipment...Roxanne would have to blame that one on Hal) but they all fit. Shiyounin sat behind the drivers' seat and drove the van out of the run-down underground car park Hal had led her to.
Roxanne looked at her friend.
"Thankyou Shiyounin." She said. "How did you know where to find us?" Shiyounin shrugged.
"I heard Mega Mind talking to Warden about Mr. Stewart looking for you. They didn't know I was listening. I have been following you whenever I can just in case. Minion not happy with extra babysitting." She laughed to herself. "Work is good for Mothers. Gets us out of the house and away from children." Roxanne still couldn't work out how the two silent fish in glass spheres were troublesome at all but she didn't feel like asking questions right now.
"You were amazing back there." She said, and meant it. Shiyounin smiled at her.
"You forget. I was bodyguard and minion for my own evil genius before you met me Miss Ritchie."
"Roxanne." Roxanne corrected her absently. Barbie started to move her head from side to side and moan quietly. "It's okay Barbie. Just lay quiet. We're safe now." She held the girl as Shiyounin drove them all home.
Megamind considered the day utterly wasted. His attempt at frightening Roxanne Rogers into telling him the truth succeeded only in panicked screaming until Wayne stepped in and held his hand over her mouth just a little too hard and for a little too long until she passed out. They then drove her to the hospital at which point she woke up and claimed amnesia.
The rest of the day was spent with the police attempting to question her as to the whereabouts of Hal Stewart. She stubbornly insisted she didn't know who they were talking about. In a fit of frustration Megamind had flung his chair across the room and got in the girl's face.
"Do you really think he cares about you? He's using you. To get to Roxanne Ritchie." She stared at him blankly.
"Hypothetically, if I knew who you were talking about I'd tell you he has no interest in that tramp on the TV." Megamind threw the folder full of photographs the Warden had given him onto the table in front of her. Graphic photos of poorly drawn graffiti of Roxanne in various positions, naked, and done in what Megamind told himself was brown crayon spilled out in front of the stupid girl. She glanced at them but other than a slight paling of her complexion she gave no response. "You need to charge me, or you need to let me go home." She said simply.
The police chief concurred. There was no real proof Hal had been in her apartment. Megamind had a hunch if the sheets were tested there would be some definite evidence but there was no way that could be done within the next week let alone that day.
Reluctantly, they had let her go home. She gave Megamind a scathing glare as she left.
"He doesn't care about you Roxanne. And if he knows you've been here talking to us at all you're in danger." He tried to warn her. She rolled her eyes and left without further comment.
He convinced the police chief to put her apartment under surveillance, and went home. Wayne followed along.
"Thanks for coming today." Megamind said to him on the drive home. Wayne shrugged.
"No problem. That's what the second-best man is for, remember?" he said. Megamind smiled in spite of the bad day.
"Yeah. Thanks. I'll return the favour when you find your Roxanne." He promised. Wayne laughed.
"I'm a bachelor, Little Buddy. Always have been, always will be."
"You don't know that." Megamind said. "I thought the same thing two years ago."
"You're different. You met the girl of your dreams. And from the sounds that frequently come from your bedroom you're more or less human where it matters." Megamind tried to keep the slightly creeped out expression from his face. How much did this man listen to? Damn his super hearing!
"Normal? In case you haven't noticed I'm blue." He said. "At least you look like a human." Wayne shifted uncomfortably.
"Yeah. Mostly." He murmured. Megamind squirmed and stared straight ahead out through the windshield. There was an awkward silence.
"Mmm. Well...so how about those Mets?" he ventured.
"They suck." Wayne answered automatically, and started talking sports. Successful subject change!
Megamind parked the car in the garage and they made their way inside. Wayne grinned, wondering exactly what kind of bucks night Minion had organised. He hoped there were strippers. He didn't like prostitutes but strippers were awesome...
They stepped into the well-lit lounge to see Minion hovering over Shiyounin, Roxanne and a girl with dark red hair, thick glasses and mismatched green and red sneakers laying on the sofa. Wayne's super hearing picked up the piercing sounds of Rei and Minion Junior's bubbly, high-pitched cries on the other side of the room in twin rockers holding their travel spheres. He winced. God that was annoying. He stopped at the sight of them all.
"Minion, aquatic buddy, I think we need to talk about the concept of the bucks' night again..." he said, disappointed. Megamind looked around not sure of what was going on.
"Roxanne?" he ventured. She looked pale, her eyes were glassy and her clothes were rumpled. He went straight to her and lifted her into his arms. She clung to him in a silent death grip. "Miss Perkiss?" he looked at Barbie. She had the same glassy eyed expression Roxanne did. He looked to Shiyounin. She, in contrast, looked perfectly calm.
"Shiyounin? What happened." He asked. She spoke in her native Japanese.
{{That ginger asshole you've been hunting down attacked them. I've been following them since you and the Warden thought I wasn't listening to your conversation the other day. Honestly, I'm a Minion for fuck's sake, do you think I don't get when someone's saying something worth listening to?}}
"Sorry." Megamind said absently.
{{Anyway, the asshole knocked them both out and tried to fuck Roxanne. I got there just in time. I would have gotten there sooner if you'd put petrol in the hover bike the last time you used it.}} She complained. Megamind squeezed his eyes shut and held Roxanne closer.
"I'm okay." Roxanne said. Megamind kissed her forehead.
"I'm so sorry. This is my fault. I should have warned you when I knew he was after you." He said.
"Yeah you should have But it's not your fault. He's insane." Roxanne protested.
"And he should be behind bars." Wayne added, getting the gist of what had happened. Funny, Megamind thought to himself. Prison was not the first thing that had jumped into his mind. Dismemberment by brainbot, perhaps. Or feeding him to the alligators. Maybe Gummy, who only had three teeth left and took forever to chew up and swallow his weekly pig carcass.
"Yeah. Bars." Megamind said, stroking Roxanne's hair.
"Why don't you take Roxanne upstairs, sir? I can take care of Miss Perkiss here."
"I'm fine Minion." Barbie said. "I was going to head home."
"Don't be silly. You can't go home tonight. You can have my bedroom. I can sleep anywhere, usually in the pond out back anyway." Minion offered.
"I stayed in there for a while, it's just fine for humans. Very clean." Wayne piped up. Barbie glanced up at him, not really having noticed him before. She looked away and mumbled something that sounded like an agreement. Megamind led Roxanne upstairs and Barbie followed Minion to his bedroom. Wayne looked around the lounge. It was just him and the female fish-dude (and the screaming fish kids).
"I guess I'm on the couch then. Some bachelor party." He sighed. Shiyounin shrugged.
"Was a boring party anyway. Love Minion, but he not good party planner. Chips, dip, underwater movie marathon." She piped up. Wayne shook his head.
"Great." He said. Shiyounin laughed.
"Don't worry. I organise party for you soon. Requests?"
"Strippers." He said automatically.
"Of course!" she said as though insulted. Wayne smiled. He hadn't really spoken to Shiyounin before but he liked her already.
Megamind waited in the bedroom while Roxanne had a quick shower and changed into her pyjamas. She looked better despite the swollen lip when she came out but Megamind knew her well enough to know she was shaken. In addition to the attack itself it bought up all the memories of her previous encounters with Hal as Titan.
They both knew it had been a miracle he hadn't tried to rape her as Titan. Megamind was thankful that he hadn't thought to try until he was his pudgy, weak-shit self again. Still if not for Shiyounin…Megamind shuddered.
Roxanne must have sensed his anxiety because she sat down beside him and put her head on his shoulder.
"Hey you, it's okay. It's an occupational hazard, you know, being the city's best reporter and all." She said and wrapped an arm around his waist.
"Yeah." He said absently, once again thinking of a painful end for Hal Stewart. He still had all those devices in storage. She nudged him with her elbow.
"I was kidding." She said. He looked down at her and couldn't help smiling.
"Sorry." He said.
"Come to bed?" she asked. He nodded and climbed under the covers with her. She laughed.
"You could get changed first." She said. He was still wearing his leathers.
"I've got some stuff to do later. I'll stay here 'til you fall asleep though." He said.
"Can't it wait?" she pleaded.
"Wedding stuff." He lied.
"Oh. Okay then." She said and snuggled into him, breathing in the scent of his suit. She did like his leather these days.
He stayed there until he heard her start to snore quietly (she still insisted she didn't snore…ha!) and then got up. He fished a de-gun out of his beside drawer and left the room.
Wayne was still awake watching a channel of dubious content in the lounge when Megamind went downstairs.
"Hey, Megamind. Where ya going?" he asked.
"Out for a bit." Wayne hadn't seen him look that serious since the black-hole end-of-the-world incident last year. He'd never seen him look this angry though.
"Megamind…let me come with you." He offered. Megamind looked at him and for the first time ever his glare sent a chill down Wayne's spine.
"Not this time. I need to do this alone. Could you watch over the house while I'm gone?" He asked. Wayne stared at him for a bit and then nodded.
"You do what you need to do little buddy." He said and turned back to the dominatrix on the screen
Satisfied, Megamind left.
Hal waited in the alley beside the fake Roxanne's apartment. By the time he'd gotten home after being attacked by that fish robot Roxanne had gone out, and she'd been gone all day. Finally Hal woke in the dark from his doze and saw a light on through her window.
"About fucking time." He muttered and took the stairs up to her apartment. He pounded on the door and she opened it. The chain was still locked.
"Where ya been, babe? I've been waiting for you." Hal smiled at her through the gap.
"The police came looking for you." She said. "You told me you were on parole."
"I am. What did they say?"
"That you escaped from jail."
"They lied. It's all that Megamind. He hates me because I almost beat him while I was a superhero." She looked at him for a while longer and then slid the chain open.
Hal walked in and went straight to the fridge, starving. All that was there was leftover spaghetti from the night before. "You didn't make dinner babe?" he asked.
"I was with the police all day." She repeated.
"Oh yeah, right okay." He said and took the huge bowl out of the fridge and put it in the microwave.
"They said you were stalking Roxanne Ritchie. They showed me pictures of your cell Hal. You told me you were over her." The fake Roxanne nagged.
"Photoshop, Roxy. Don't believe anything the police tell you. They all work for Megamind now." There was silence while the microwave heated up his dinner. It beeped, and he took his bowl and a fork into the lounge room and sat down on the sofa. He began shovelling the food into his mouth, only noticing Roxanne standing there with her arms crossed when he was halfway done. "Sorry babe, did you want some?" he asked.
"I think you should go. I didn't sign up for this." She said. Hal swallowed his mouthful, for the first time really noticing her. She looked tired and red around the eyes. He put down his bowl and got up.
"Aww come on Roxy don't be like that. You don't want to end what we have do you?" he went and wrapped his arms around her rigid body. He didn't want it to end. Sex on tap, a bed, food, money when he needed it and a place to hide while he plotted his next move to get at the real Roxanne.
He would have her. He would fuck her until he was over it and then he would kill her. He held the fake Roxanne tighter.
"I don't want to get into trouble Hal." She said but she didn't sound convincing.
"I know babe. Hey," he tipped her face up so she looked at him. "I won't let anything happen to you." He said and kissed her. She parted her lips and he stuck his tongue in her mouth. Oh yeah. He could do with getting off after the massive boner the real Roxanne had left him with in the afternoon. That fish…that fish had to die too. He would have finally had her if that fish hadn't interfered. He grabbed the fake Roxanne's ass and ground his cock up against her. "Come on Roxy, let's go to bed."
Once he was done he lay back and tried to catch his breath. That had been awesome. For the moment he felt peaceful and happy, laying with the warm body in the bed snuggled up against him. He wondered if this could ever be enough for him. He could crash here with Fake Roxy and make a life, have kids, be a stay at home Dad while she went to work. He happily daydreamed about the future he could have here all the while fantasising about the woman he almost had.
"Hal?" Roxy said.
"Yeah babe?" he said and kissed her forehead.
"Hal I've been meaning to tell you something for a while now." She hesitated.
"Go ahead Roxy I'm listening." He said, continuing his daydream. Roxanne. God I almost had you. Had your ass in my hands. He let his imagination finish what he hadn't been able to as Fake Roxy continued to talk.
"…and well, it's Rachel." She finished. The silence told Hal he had missed something.
"Say what?" he asked, in case it had been important.
"I'm really sorry but I wasn't sure you'd get back to me what with all the other fan mail you would have gotten in prison. I thought if I signed my name 'Roxanne' it would at least get your attention." He stared at her.
"Your name?" he said.
"Is Rachel. Hal I'm so sorry. But now we're in a real relationship and all I know you wouldn't throw it all away over something that small. Can you forgive me?" she asked. His breathing quickened and he started to feel hot. He tested the name out in his mouth.
"Rachel?" he said. His tongue felt thick and heavy as he said it.
"Yeah." She laughed and hugged him tighter, oblivious to his building rage. Rachel? He didn't want Rachel!
He stared at the ceiling as his fantasies evaporated. Now he didn't even have a fake Roxanne! All he had was this Rachel slut. He looked down at her naked body and ran his hands over her skin. She moaned.
"Up for round two, babe?" she asked, and flinched when he pinched her breast.
"Ooh yeah." He answered.