Again, if anyone is offended by what I'm writing, I'm sorry.

Dark Pit strolled through the village of Clearview. His wings were hidden under a black jacket. He carried a bag on his left shoulder. He was tired of walking. After making it to Clearview's Main Street, he found a bench and sighed in relief. Dark Pit settled himself it and began to scourge through his bag.

It was said that somewhere in the town, there was an old cave that contained treasure. DP had come here to investigate it. However, he didn't want to ask the locals. From the info he had gotten, they were defensive about the treasure for some reason. The man he had spoken to earlier had been sent to jail once just for bringing it up!

He slowly got up and looked around. Clearview didn't contain an inn. It was too small for that. He wished that he had brought a tent with him. Maybe a store sold them?

He entered a large white building. A girl around his age looked over at him. She had long blonde hair tied back in a ponytail and large blue eyes.

She came over, smiling. She had the fattest red lips DP had ever seen. "Good morning! I'm Mary. Can I help you?"

The girl wasn't wearing a blue and gray uniform, like the guys he saw nearby. Instead, she had on a pink, sparkly dress. It made him cringe. Did she work here or was she toying with him?

"So, um...Do you guys sell tents?"

Mary nodded. "Yep, yep! We certainly do!" She turned and waved to him. "Follow me, if you'd please." She walked down the aisle nearby, and made a right turn. Dark Pit followed her, but cautiously. There was something strange about her. It wasn't her strawberry perfume.

It was her attitude. He was put off by it. It didn't seem normal for someone who worked in a store. Unless Mary was having a good day or something?

When they finally got to an isle with a display of green tents, she turned and giggled. "Here you go, mister!"

"Yeah, um, thanks." Dark Pit began searching through them. They all seemed to be of poor quality and made him groan. "What happened to them? There's holes everywhere on this one, that one doesn't come with wooden pegs..."

Mary shrugged. "I don't know why, but it's been like this for awhile. I had to buy milk with half its contents missing yesterday."

Someone giggled. "You sure it wasn't..." A tall girl stepped out from behind a shelf. She had long light blue hair and purple eyes. She was dressed in a light blue revealing outfit. "Me?!" She winked at Dark Pit.

Dark Pit glared back. "Pandora? What are you doing here of all places?"

"Nothing much," the Goddess of Calamity said," except spying on you." She floated over and glared at Mary. "I see you've been hanging out with that girl? You should get away from her. Like, now."

Mary backed away from Pandora. She blushed madly. "I was here first for him. Back off."

Dark Pit glared at Mary. "Mary Sue? That's you isn't it? You've come to stalk me again? Shadow the Hedgehog rejected you?"

"Um...Yes." Mary smiled nervously. "I love you!"

"I don't!"

"I love him and I'm a canon character!" Pandora yelled. She began playing with DP's hair.

He pulled away from her. "I have no feelings for you either! Stay away, will ya?"

Pandora blinked. "That's...Harsh."

"Yeah, honestly I don't give a Magikarp." Dark Pit smirked. "Sorry. Maybe someone else would take you?"

"Um...Well..." Pandora blinked. An awkward silence followed. "I always assumed that you like me. You said "Who IS that," or something along those lines when I changed to this form."

"That's because you looked ugly," Dark Pit snickered.

Pandora's face heated up. "Well, I'll show you who's the ugly one..."

Mary interrupted her before she even got close to him. "I still want him!"

"No, me!" Pandora yelled. She turned to glare at her.

Mary lunged at Pandora. Her hands glowed for a moment before revealing very long rainbow nails. Pandora pulled out her short light blue sword and swung it at her. Mary fell on top of one of the tents, destroying it.

Meanwhile, Dark Pit fled from the scene. He attracted the attention of the guys nearby.

"Girl fight on isle 7," he told them. Then, he flung open the door and raced out of the building.

Screw the treasure. Screw staying in Clearview overnight. Dark Pit only had one thing on his mind.

FLEE.

The store exploded in flames behind him. He heard Mary Sue scream and Pandora laugh. The store clerks yelped and fled out the building.

And then silence. He looked at the store. A light from above penetrated it. The embers faded. An angel in white came down from the sky. It was Pit, here to deal with crazy Pandora.

Dark Pit just turned and walked away. The next town wasn't far from here. It was larger than Clearview and popular with tourists. Hopefully there would be no Mary Sues or goddesses destroying everything there.

Hopefully.