Disclaimer (Dammit): According to Frank, my evil bunny minion, if I owned South Of Nowhere in the Tangent Universe, then it wouldn't be the exact replica of our current Universe, and all the universes would collapse upon itself and a giant, inconceivable black hole would be created, and everything in space would be destroyed, leaving a blank space of nothingness. Considering that, I decided it's safe if I don't own South Of Nowhere.
I spotted Kyla laying on a table reading a book in the empty cafeteria, headphones plugged into her ears. She bobbed her head slightly in time to the song she was listening to, completely oblivious to my presence. I slid into the bench at her table and yanked out a bud.
She flinched and slammed the book shut, her head turning to face me in surprise. Realizing it was only me, she frowned with annoyance. "What do you want Ashley?" she growled, opening her book again.
I stretched out along the bench, looking up at the sky. "What were you talking to Spencer about? Back in the quad?" Spencer had said that Kyla was stressing about a test, but I know Kyla, and even if she was ranting about a test, she wouldn't have gotten up as quickly as she did. She doesn't hate me that much to avoid me at all costs.
She continued to stare at her book, eyes moving too quickly to be reading it seriously. She shrugged. "What's it matter to you?" she flipped the page sharply, tearing it a bit at the spine.
I laced my fingers together and set them on my chest. I thought for a second. Why did it matter to me? I honestly could care less what goes on in my sisters life, and Spencer's life is totally not my business. And Kyla wouldn't dare talk about me. Would she? I took a chance and bluffed.
"Because you were talking about me." I stated confidently.
She froze, stiffening slightly. I could see her throat move and she swallowed, her eyes still. She flipped the page slowly. "No we weren't." she lied unconvincingly.
I tried to stifle a snort. "Kyla, you are lying badly to my face. What were you talking about?" I sat up, giving her a hard stare.
She flipped her hair and turned a page. I snatched the book and looked at the cover. Twilight? Ick.
"We were talking about you and Aiden. And your... bed time companions." She said the last bit with a smirk.
I froze. Kyla was talking about me and Aiden, to Spencer? "You told Spencer about me and Aiden?" I hissed.
She shrugged. "She already knew about you and Aiden's history. She was more concerned about your playmates."
Okay, so I had a history of sleeping around. I wasn't proud of it; to be honest, half of them were lousy. You would expect that I had a better sense of judgement. I mean, I'm Ashley, I should have a better sense of shaggable people.
I started to speak, and I heard my name called from the other side of quad. I turned around and spotted my blonde practically skipping over towards me. She plopped down next to me a placed a kiss on my cheek.
Kyla lifted a brow and smirked. "Especially this particular playmate." She gave me a snarky grin and gathered her stuff.
Katie looked at me confused and asked: "Playmate? Me? Who? What?"
I rolled my eyes and grabbed her hand. "Nothing. Kyla is just being a bitch, as usual." Katie leaning into me, apparently satisfied.
Kyla snorted, displeased that I called her a bitch. "Not like usual. And I wasn't being a bitch. I was merely being informative." She slid off the bench and reached down to grab her purse.
Katie reached over and snagged the bag before Kyla could and looked inside. "Informative? How?" she pulled out a cheese stick and started to unwrap it. I ripped a piece off the top and stuck it in my mouth.
Kyla snatched the bag back. "Spencer is single. I was just informing my dear half-sister. I heard she had a thing for Spencer a while back."I felt my jaw drop as Kyla gave me a triumphant look.
Katie bit into the cheese and looked thoughtful. "But she doesn't now, does she?"
I felt my stomach clench as Kyla stared at me. I still did. I mean, I probably always would. I would never do anything. Never instigate anything. Why would I? I'd face immediate rejection. And I had Katie. Who was still staring at me expectantly. "No, of course not. I have you." I kissed her nose gently and she smiled.
Kyla rolled her eyes. "Alright, I'm oficially going to puke now. I'm going back to history. I'd rather learn about Timber Castles than watch this ick-fest." She shrugged on her purse and headed out of the cafeteria.
Katie frowned, bothered by a thought. "Are you sure? I know what it's like to want someone you can't have. I mean, especially with Spencer. I know what it's like to be ensnared by her. Who wouldn't?" She bit her lip and set the cheese wrapper on the table.
"You had a thing for Spencer?" I asked, incredulous. I never knew that Katie had a thing for women. I always saw her with guys. The last thing I expected was for her to admit to having a small crush on Spencer.
"Oh yeah. It was one of the main reasons why I joined the squad in the first place. Then I found out that Spencer is homophobic, at least her family is, and I kinda started to pull away from her." She looked mildly upset by it, but I wasn't too concerned about her. I was more concerned about what she had said.
Spencer a homophobic? I would have never guessed, and now it bothered my. I had been toying her for days, flirting with her, and she had played back. Went along with the game. Even threw in her own curve ball. Now I questioned it all. Was Spencer just stringing me along, getting a kick out of watching me play with her, or was it all just innocent banter to her? At least it confirmed my idea that I'd never get the girl. Not only was I not good enough for her, I wasn't even worth anything to her.
Katie poked me, jerking me back to earth. She looked slightly annoyed. "I'm beginning to think that there is still some feeling for Spencer with you?" She started to pull away, scoot down the bench, but I grabbed her hand.
I smiled at her and kissed her lightly. "No, nothing left for her. I was just shocked. I would have never guessed, is all."
Katie narrrowed her eyes. "What do you mean? Did something happen between you two?" Jealousy was obvious in her voice; it dripped from her words, laced with suspicision.
I shook my head. "No, of course not. Nothing but playful banter. I always read it wrong is all." I squeezed her hand reassuringly, but she still looked unconvinced.
She moved back next to me and let go of my hand. "I never saw any kind playful banter when I flirted with her. She always just kind of ignored me or stared at me coldly. She was always very rude." She stood up.
I shrugged casually and stood up next to her. "I don't know what to say, but I can say that I am 100% sure that nothing can, and will, ever happen between me and Spencer. I promise." I smiled at her. I wasn't exactly in love with Katie. I like her well enough, and she seemed to like me (not to mention an excellent shag, but that's besides the point), and at this point that was enough for me. It was easy to be with her. She wasn't intimidating, or far out of my league. She was jealous, but wasn't controlling about it, and she was very hot. Not like Spencer, of course, but nonetheless. She was worth holding onto.
She seemed satisfied and grabbed my hand, walking us forward to the exit. "Well, I guess we should get back to class then? We've been gone for ages. I'm surprised that the bell hasn't rung yet." She gave me a small smile and we walked out.
We walked in silence for a minute, neither one of us anxious to break the silence. It was comfortable. Simply. Unlike Spencer, where it became complicated. I liked this easiness. There was no rush. It was comfortable.
I felt Katie stop next to me, shaking me out of my pleasant thoughts, and I frowned, looking at was she had spotted. Spencer stood ahead of us, stopped like we had by our presence. Now that I knew that one small detail about her, I could see the uncomfortable look on her face, at seeing me with Katie. She shuffled slightly, unsure of what to do.
Next to me, Katie was looking at me expectantly, as if she was waiting for me to make a decision. In an instant I knew what she was waiting for. She wanted me to show her that I didn't want Spencer. In front of Spencer. Almost defiantly, slightly bitter that Spencer had been playing with me, I leaned forward and kissed Katie full on the mouth hard, like I was marking her, showing her what she silently told me to show her. I pulled back slightly, flicking my eyes at Spencer, who flushed. I leaned back in and ran my tongue along Katie's bottom lip, asking for entrance. She seemed surprised at first by how intense the moment was getting, but quickly took me in, battling me for dominance.
Spencer, shifted awkwardly, clearing her throat. Katie pulled away and turned to Spencer, a look of satisfaction on her face, clear that she was pleased that I had chosen her. Spencer kept her eyes trained on me, her expression unreadable. Almost disgust, almost jealous. It was hard to decipher, and I found myself wanting, no needing, to know what she was thinking at that moment.
Was she angry that we were displaying affection, sinful affection, right in front of her? Was she thinking about how disgusting we were, with our unnatural behaviour? Was she thinking about starting an intervention? Or was she jealous? Wishing that it was her that I had been kissing, and not Katie? Or was she so deeply conflicted, torn between her beliefs and her desires?
It was kind of satisfactory, thinking that Spencer might be conflicted. It was relieving, to be honest, that maybe Spencer was feeling the same way I did, torn between what we have been told all our lives, what we believed and what kept us back, and what we really and truly wanted. Spencer, taught that liking the same sex was wrong, perverted, and unnatural; yet feeling so attracted to another girl that it hurt to keep believing all that nonsense.
Me, believing that I wasn't good enough for anyone I though better than myself. That and attraction as strong as mine for Spencer wasn't something that I deserved, and that if I did give in to that attraction, that I didn't deserve that happiness I would gain from it. Yet here in front of me, staring at me in the face, was the one person I struggled with myself against.
As comfortable as I was with Katie, how easy and relaxed, she wasn't Spencer. She didn't have that spark, and she may never. But Spencer wasn't something I could ever conceive being with, and Katie was. I had made my decision, hard as it was. And Spencer wasn't in my life equation, no matter how much I wanted her to be.
Spencer turned around silently, and walked away, leaving me holding Katie and watching her leave. Katie leaned against my chest, ear against my heart. It wasn't fast. In fact, it felt like it had slowed down, died a little for a moment. She squeeze my hand and brought it to her lips, kissing the knuckles gently.
"I'm glad you chose me," she said quietly. I squeezed her gently and rocked her.
"Yeah. Me too."
A/N: To my followers who have been following my story and are angry that I have failed to post this one time... Dammit, why am I apologising for? This is my new update. My time locked up at Devereux was just more time for me to be planning this epic tale. You should all be not pissed at me and should be reviewing so I can stop going mad and spazzing out in public. Oh! And my cherubi, who was my beta, quit. She kinda sucked anyway. So I need a new beta T_T. DO NOT MIND ERRORS. And Katie was Kaitie, but I'm lazy, so its Katie. Live. . Read and Review, Symphonites. Or no new chapter. Or you'll get a chapter where Frank comes in and destroys the whole story. Your pick!