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When Shane had eventually disappeared from my view I turned back to face the other's Ed had managed to get back up on his feet leaning heavily on Carol's shoulder as she struggled to hold him up. I couldn't watch this anymore and headed back to camp.
I saw Jacob was on watch on his own and climbed up on top of the RV to keep him company.
"Hey," I smiled sitting down next to him.
"Hey how you feeling?" He asked.
I shrugged. "Better I guess, Shane just beat the shit out of Ed down at the lake,"
Jacob turned to stare at me in shock. "Shit why'd he do that?"
"Slapped Carol in front of everyone was about to hit me or Andrea I'm not sure who Shane arrived just in time,"
At that point we saw Ed and Carol re-enter camp, Carol still crying and apologising they headed for the tent. We watched in silence until they disappeared inside.
"Shane had no right to do that," Jacob commented. It was now my turn to stare at him in shock. "You are kidding me right?"
"It ain't our business what happens in Carol and Ed's marriage-"
"Shane intervened for once did something to stop him which is better than what everyone else has done. He hit Carol in front of everyone else Jacob and was going to continue hitting others, the guy is an abuser he deserved everything he got," I cut him off.
"Carol doesn't seem to think so,"
Annoyed I stood up, "I'm not listening to this," and I climbed down the RV. The camp was pretty quiet the other girls were still at the lake, Lori was sat outside at the table doing work with the children, Carol and Ed were in the tent and most of the other's were in Atlanta.
I saw Shane stood by a tree playing with a gun in his pocket; I looked around before going to see him.
"I see you opted for the tough guy look out there," I joked.
Shane looked at me, before glancing over my shoulder his eyes filled with misery. I turned to look who he was looking at, Lori.
"I guess you two are off now then?" I commented.
He turned back to look at me. "We were never on," He lied.
"Bullshit," I replied folding my arms.
"You don't know what you're talking about,"
I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, next time you should probably find a girl who isn't married and also importantly isn't married to your best friend."
I thought Shane would go ballistic but he just looked at me before smiling. "Yeah I guess," He admitted.
"And what you did to Ed was bloody brilliant by the way,"
Shane smiled again putting his hand on the tree, it was then I noticed his knuckles which were covered in blood and were beginning to bruise judging by the look of Ed's face it wasn't surprising. I reached out my hand and delicately touched it, he flinched slightly.
"We gotta get that cleaned up or it'll get infected," I said holding onto his hand and looking at the bruising.
He pulled it away. "No thank you,"
"I'm not taking no for an answer,"
I began walking away towards the RV and Shane started to follow, I grabbed the first aid box from inside and told Shane to sit at the table. Obediently he sat and held out his hand. I rubbed the antiseptic cream over it and he winced again.
"Oh stop you baby," I giggled
"Since when did you play nurse?" He asked.
"Well when your brother's come home bruised and bloodied you kinda pick it up. Merle especially he was always getting into some kind of trouble with some fellas,"
There was a brief silence whilst I cleaned away the bloody remnants he really had done some damage here.
"About Merle," Shane began.
"I don't want to talk about it," I interrupted and Shane fell silent.
I wrapped the bandage round his knuckles and finished by tying it in place. "Now don't be going and hitting anyone for a while," I smiled packing away the first aid kit. I was about to walk away when Shane grabbed my hand, I jumped slightly and turned to face him.
"Thanks Kayl," He said softly rubbing my knuckles slightly.
"You're welcome," I smiled.
I couldn't move from the spot and Shane didn't move his hand either. It was then I caught Lori watching us a stern glare burned through me. Clearing my throat I pulled my hand away and moved into the RV. Lori watched me all the way and I was beginning to get slightly pissed off I mean for god sake he was like twice my age and wouldn't fancy me anyway, it was obvious that Shane was besotted with Lori, and even if he did it had nothing to do with her, her husband came back and she kicked Shane to the kerb.
I caught my reflection in the mirror, my cheeks were flushed oh god I must have looked such an idiot like some stupid school girl with a crush, but I didn't have a crush no way not me not Kaylin Dixon. I rested my hands on the sink and concentrated on breathing when I heard footsteps come up to the RV.
I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw it was only Amy. "Thank god it's you," I said.
"Err thanks?" Amy giggled throwing down the laundry basket. "Why what's up,"
"Apart from Merle been handcuffed to a roof, Daryl in a danger zone trying to get him, arguing with Jacob and getting death stares from Lori nothing much,"
"Just the norm then? Why have you been rowing with Jacob?" Amy asked sitting down at the table. I followed her sitting down myself.
"He thought Shane was out of order punching Ed, it made me mad I guess,"
"You guys can't argue I'm counting on yous to get it together," She winked.
I smiled but couldn't help but watch Shane out of the window; maybe Jacob wasn't the right one. "I don't know Amy,"
Amy followed my gaze. "You have got to be kidding right?" She exclaimed.
"Don't be so stupid Amy! Shane is like twice my age or something, maybe I just don't want a boyfriend have you ever thought of that instead of constantly been on my case trying to play matchmaker," I snapped and instantly regretted it. I expected her to storm off but she didn't she just fell silent.
"Amy I'm-,"
"No you're right your love life has nothing to do with me, I guess I kind of was just looking for some kind of normality I didn't mean to upset you,"
"He was called Thomas," I randomly blurted out. "I-we weren't together but I'd fancied him for ages and we were gonna go on a date but well the world went to shit. He asked me out and then then I never saw him again,"
"Oh Kaylin I'm sorry I had absolutely no idea," Amy said her face full of sincerity and sadness.
I shrugged. "We've all lost people, that's just how things are," I guess I was embarrassed for allowing myself to show my weakness I mean I hadn't spoken of Thomas to anyone, not even Merle and Daryl because I knew they'd have charged round to his house with a shot gun or something.
"Amy are you ready?" We heard Andrea call.
"We're going fishing do you want to come with?" Amy asked standing up.
I shook my head. "I think I'm just going to stay here and wait for Daryl and Merle,"
I sat on my own outside my tent with the photo of my mum and brothers thinking why my life was so shit. Some people would call me selfish or ungrateful but that's because they didn't understand what had happened to me to us. I was an accident I'm aware of that born seventeen years after Daryl. Momma used to call me her little miracle then she collided with a truck on her way home from work and died instantly when I was six.
Daddy had snapped when she died he had already relied on the drink and it just tipped him over the edge. Merle wasn't really around at this point he was always getting in to trouble with the law in and out of prison. Me and Daryl used to take the brunt of Daddy's anger and we sure as hell have the scars to prove it. He couldn't do much to protect me because Daryl wasn't always tough like he is now and nobody could stop Daddy nobody.
That was until Merle came home one day from prison when I was nine. Me and Daryl were comforting each other after another beating. Merle had taken one look at my black eye and the tears pouring down my face and flipped. He beat Daddy to a pulp right in front of me an attack matching the one Shane gave Ed.
"Merle!" I had cried thinking he'd killed him.
Daddy coughed blood trickling from his mouth. Merle picked him up by the scuff of neck and hauled him onto the porch. I followed him closely and watched as he pushed him off the porch and daddy fell to the floor.
"You get out of here ya hear me! Don't come back or I will kill you! You disgusting waste of a man!"
Daddy stumbled to his feet and motioned to me with his hands. "Come here Kaylin baby,"
I grabbed Merle's leg and hid myself from his view.
"Don't fucking speak to her! Just get out of here!" He shouted again and we started attracting some attention from the neighbours.
"Come on son, I'm your father,"
"You are dead to me," Merle said and pushed me inside.
We stood watching from the door Daddy eventually began to walk away and we never saw him again after that. I suddenly felt angry, confused and very very hurt. I hit out at Merle with my fists though I knew I wasn't hurting him and sobbing uncontrollably.
"You weren't here!" I cried.
Merle bent down to my level and grabbed my fists gently. "I'm here now and no one aint ever gonna hurt you again you hear me?" He asked.
I nodded and he pulled me into a big hug stroking my hair while I cried. "No one aint ever gonna hurt you again," He repeated.
Back in reality my tear landed on the photo and I cursed myself for crying rubbing at my eyes fiercely. I didn't notice Jacob walk over and sit next to me until he spoke.
"You ok?" He asked
I nodded putting the photo behind my back and resting my hand on my leg.
"I'm sorry I made you mad before," He apologised.
"I'm sorry for been a hot head it seems I can't get along with anyone today,"
"You're worried about your brother's it's understandable,"
I didn't reply and he reached over and grabbed my hand his smooth skin rubbing my thumb just like Shane had done before. "Everything is going to be ok Kaylin," He said softly. I turned to look at him our faces inches apart when he started moving in and I panicked because I didn't know what to think or how I felt and I guess I couldn't help breathe a sigh of relief when I heard Amy and Andrea return from their fishing trip shouting of us.
Jumping to my feet I hurried over to see them leaving Jacob behind.
Later on that day something strange happened. It was Jim he was digging holes lots and lots of holes and wouldn't really speak to anyone. We all stood watching him wondering what was going through his mind. He didn't seem to know that he was drawing attention to himself as he hammered his shovel into the ground me and Amy exchanged confused worrying looks and no one was really sure what to say.
"Hey Jim," Shane finally said but he didn't reply he just carried on digging the ground the sweat pouring off his face and back. "Why don't you hold up alright? Just give us a second here please," He added and this seemed to work he stabbed the spade into the ground and turned to face Shane and the rest of us.
"What do you want?" He asked his voice having lost breath.
"I'm just a little concerned man that's all," Shane continued tucking his hands into his pocket.
"Dale says you've been out here for hours," Morales added.
"So?"
"So why are you digging?" I asked concerned for his safety and wellbeing.
Jim smirked rubbing the sweat off his face.
"You heading to China or something?" Shane asked trying to make a joke.
Jim smiled. "So what it's not as if I'm hurting anyone," and he picked up his spade again.
"Except yourself its a hundred degrees out here today you can't keep this up!" Dale argued trying his best to make him see reason.
"Sure I can, watch me!" And he began stabbing the ground with much more force.
"Jim they're not going to say it so I will," Lori began moving herself to the front of the crowd. "You're scaring people, you're scaring my son and Carol's daughter."
I turned to look at the kids who were stood with Carol they didn't look overly scared just confused like the rest of us but I wasn't about to argue with Lori about it.
"They got nothing to be scared of," he replied. "I mean what the hell people I'm out here by myself why don't y'all just go and leave me the hell alone," and he began digging again.
However none of us moved and Shane began to move towards him. "We think you need to take a break ok, why don't you get yourself in the shade, some food and I'll tell you what maybe in a little bit I'll come out here and help you myself, Jim just tell me what this is about, why don't you just go ahead and give me that shovel?"
Jim stopped digging again and dug the shovel into the ground "Or what?" He dared to ask.
"There is no or what, I'm asking you I'm coming to you and I'm asking you please I don't want to have to take it from you," Shane replied calmly but it still had little effect on Jim.
"And if I don't then what? You gonna beat my face in like Ed then, y'all seen his face what's left of it!" He shouted.
"Jim!" and I started pushing my way to stand next to Shane, "That's enough ok,"
He ignored me, "See that's what happens when someone crosses you," and he started digging again.
"That was different Jim,"
"You weren't there Ed was out of control he was hurting his wife," I argued.
"That is their marriage that is not his!" He shouted at me. "He is not judge and jury who voted you king huh?"
Shane had had enough at this point. "Jim I'm not here to argue with you just give me the shovel ok," and he went to grab it but he was not giving it up without a fight. As he swung it at Shane, fortunately who was quick to react dodged before knocking Jim to the floor. I ran to his side bending down I looked him in the face.
"Jim just calm down ok no one is going to hurt you,"
"That's the biggest lie going," He said quietly as Shane attached handcuffs to his wrist. "I told that to my wife to my two boys I said it a hundred times it didn't matter they came out of nowhere there were dozens of them. Just pulled them right out of my hand, did you know the only reason I got away was because the dead were too busy eating my family."
I leant back on my knees shocked and saddened and turned to look at everyone else who held the similar expression. It made me realise just how much had been lost already and how much more there was probably left to lose.
We'd all taken turns to go and check on Jim who was tied to a tree after his outburst earlier. I made my way over and sat down next to him.
"It's a cruel world we live in I mean I used to hear people saying that kind of shit all the time and I never really believed it until now," I sighed.
Jim nodded in agreement, "You're a good kid Kaylin and no matter how shit the world gets and no matter what you have to do don't lose that about yourself. And tell those closest to you how you really feel that's my biggest regret,"
I turned to look at Jacob before turning to look at Shane. With nothing left to say I patted Jim on the shoulder and went and helped Andrea and Amy cook tea but I couldn't help but keep thinking about what Jim had said to me it was the most smartest thing anyone had ever said since the walkers had taken over.
Later on that night we all sat round the camp fire except Ed who was still sulking in his tent and the others who hadn't come back to camp yet I was starting to worry Daryl had promised me they'd be back before sundown and yet they still weren't here. The fish Amy and Andrea had caught was lovely but I was struggling to eat it with the massive lump that had formed in my throat.
"I gotta ask you man it's been driving me crazy," Morales said to Dale.
"What?" Dale asked smiling.
"That watch,"
Dale still smiling lifted his hand up to his face and began fiddling with it. "What's wrong with my watch?"
"I see you everyday same time winding that thing like a village priest saying mass," he joked and we all giggled.
"I wondered this myself," Jacqui smiled eating her fish.
"I'm missing the point here," Dale suggested.
"Unless I've misread the signs the world seems to have come to an end at least at a speed bump for a long while,"
"And yet I see you everyday winding that stupid watch," Morales added.
"It's important to keep track isn't it?" Dale asked. "The days at least don't you think Andrea?"
Andrea's eyes widened and you could tell like the rest of us she didn't really understand Dale's crazy watch thing he had going on here she decided not to reply instead taking a drink of beer.
"I like what errm father says to son when he gave him a watch. That had been handed down from generations; he said I give you a mausoleum of all hope and desire, which will fit your individual needs no better than it did mine or my father's before me. I give it you not that you may remember time but you may forget it for a moment now and then and not spend all of your breath trying to forget." He explained and he had everyone absolutely enchanted with his words.
"You are so weird," Amy joked and we all burst out laughing.
"It's not me it's Faulkner, William Faulkner maybe my bad paraphrasing.
"Kaylin, why don't you ever sing in front of anyone?" Amy asked and everyone turned to stare at me.
"I do," I replied pushing the fish around with my fork. "I just haven't since the world went bad,"
"Well give us a sing song then," Jacob added nudging me with his elbow.
"I can't I'm sorry," I said putting my eyes to my plate.
Everyone started groaning and begging and it was too hard to resist. There was one song I'd been practicing for a while.
"Sophia have you finished with that cup?" I asked.
She nodded handing it over to me, grabbing a tray I sat myself down on the floor before tapping out the familiar tune.
"I've got my ticket for the long way round two bottles of whiskey for the way and I sure would like some sweet company oh I'm leaving tomorrow what do you say? When I'm gone, when I'm gone, when I'm gone, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone, you're gonna miss me by my hair you're gonna miss me everywhere oh I know you're gonna miss me when I'm gone,"
I carried on for the rest of the song and when I'd finished everyone clapped and cheered though I had to beg them to keep the noise down it was nice to finally be able to sing again. Amy put down her tray and stood up.
"Where are you going?" Andrea asked.
"I have to pee, jeez trying to be discreet around here,"
And we all laughed again.
A few minutes had passed and I couldn't believe how much fun we were all having of course all good things have to come to an end what happened next was all a bit of a blur. Amy opened the door of the RV.
"We're out of toilet paper!" She shouted.
All of a sudden a walker had grabbed her arm and was biting down on it hard she screamed in pain.
"Amy!" Andrea shouted running over to her.
The camp erupted in chaos walkers were everywhere and everyone was screaming. I grabbed my knife though my hand was shaking from fear and pressure. We all ran about like headless chickens in a panic. I stabbed a walker through the head and it fell to the ground. Looking around me I could see walkers attacking my friends left right and centre.
Another walker came at me I kicked it in its stomach before stomping on its head. I looked towards Amy who lay on the ground Andrea lying over her and I felt my heart bleed. Distraction was all it took when I felt my hair been pulled hard, I screamed trying to wrestle from the walkers grip as it growled and snapped it's teeth at me. A loud gunshot and my hair was free shaking Shane came to my rescue picking me up he held me close.
"Shhh," He whispered stroking my tear stained face and pulling me over towards the others. Lori grabbed my hand but I knew I had to help as best I could pulling the gun Merle had given me from my belt I shot the best I could walkers fell everywhere.
"Come on stay close!" Shane kept shouting over all the screams.
Suddenly more gunshot noise sounded it was Daryl and the others they were back. With us all shooting together in a matter of minutes all the walkers were dead. I let my gun fall to the floor as I looked at our safe little camp all destroyed in a matter of minutes we'd lost half of our group including Amy the girl I'd considered a best friend.
I moved over to her and gripped her hand. "Amy," I gasped and she squeezed my hand tight sobbing.
Her face was pale blood pouring from her neck she reached up placing her fingers on my face. More tears fell and I wasn't ashamed of it. I put my over arm around Andrea while she sobbed. Amy's breathing began to slow and eventually she stopped all together and that was when we knew she was gone.
I jumped as someone grabbed me but thankfully it was just Daryl. "Kaylin thank god you're alright,"
"Where were you!" I screamed at him before bursting into tears. He didn't reply just enveloped me into his arms and rocked me while I sobbed. I knew then what Jim was talking about and I knew then why he was digging those holes.
I always hated that bit of the episode when the walkers come and destroy the camp it's so sad hope I did the scene some justice review and let me know what you thought!