A/N: The title of this piece comes from P!nk's "Family Portrait".

Also geez it's been awhile since I put up a story. School got a bit crazy for awhile. And can I just say? I am not good at writing fights. But I wanted to write a friend fight between Casey and April. Now that that is out of the way, I can hopefully get back on schedule. If I want to get the story I want up for the TMNT Mini-Bang in time, then it must be done.

Still sorry about that! It's totally like me to promise more regular posting and then immediately disregard what I say.

As always this is un-beta'd!

Disclaimer: I don't own Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Part Fourteen: I Don't Want Love To Destroy Me

Casey Jones and April O'Neil never really had friends.

Sure they had people to talk with in classes. Sure they had people they were polite with.

But those special people, those people that they could be nakedly candid with? Those people they could count on to be there when life sucked? The people they would do anything for?

It was pretty much nil.

Outside of their families, they really had no one.

For their own reasons: nerdy and angry, misfit and loner, they were separate from their peers.

It made making friends hard.

For a brief shining moment, Casey had Nick and loved him fiercely. But it snuffed out.

April had Irma, but there was something that was missing with her relationship to the other girl. April couldn't relate to her on the level that she could Casey or the turtles.

When April had found the turtles, she had found her first true friends in the world. It's why their role, however accidental, in her father's mutation stung so much. Then she met Casey.

Casey was weird and wild, loved a fight, and was mature in her own way. When Casey met the turtles, she formed her own friendships with them in turn.

In a way, the turtles were both April and Casey's first real friends. April and Casey were, in turn, both their own first real girlfriends and became the turtles first friends as well.

The thing is when you have people who didn't have friends, suddenly have friends that can lead to friction.

Because those lonely souls, when they finally meet their first true companions in the world? They tend to act like a dragon protecting their hoard. They want them for themselves and it is, at times, hard to share. Even though the other is apart of that hoard.

And it has to do with their similar cores.

April O'Neil and Casey Jones both are mature young women. Despite how silly both of them can be, they had to grow up rapidly at an early age. They both were stubborn, clever, and had a tendency to dig their heels in. These traits were sooner over later going to spark some source of conflict.

An immovable object meets and unstoppable force. What happens next?

"Don't tell me what to do, Red!" yelled Casey.

There was a shallow cut on one of her cheeks, which were flushed from exertion. Her eyes shone brightly with rush and the adrenaline of a physical fight. A steady stream of blood trickled down from her temple mixing with her sweat.

She was still dressed in her vigilante garb. Distantly, in the corner of her mind unconsumed by anger, she was glad that she didn't wear her face paint today.

Still that fact that April insinuated that she didn't belong in the fight got her rankled. Where the hell did this come from?

"You nearly got yourself killed, Casey!" shouted April back. She was also in disarray from the fight. Strands of red hair escape the confines of her ponytail to frame her face. Her green eyes were grave and mouth set into a stubborn line.

A fresh bandage, clearly from Donnie, covered a cut on her arm. The turtle had tactfully disappeared when the yelling started. Or maybe he was just hiding.

Casey was going with the hiding. Normally this whole thing would amuse, the ninja was afraid of a couple of girls getting into a fight.

But right now? April was spouting bullshit that she couldn't stand.

"Well so did you, Red! You ran into that battle. One where everyone told you to stay away from without a second thought."

"Oh don't you take that stance with me, Casey Jones," April said crossing her arms. "I am training to be a kunoichi."

"Key word being training, April. You are training as in you aren't one yet."

"Well you're no better! You're just an amateur, too!"

Casey twitched a bit.

"I spent the better part of last year in fight clubs, April!"

"OhmyGod Casey! Stop bringing that up! No one cares about that!"

Casey clenched her fist and tried to ignore the blossoming hurt.

"Still proves I have more experience then you." Casey said through gritted teeth. "At least I'm wearing some sort of body armor. What do you got huh? Your tights and a yellow t-shirt? That's going to do jack shit! The Kraang want you, Red!"

"I am not going to be locked away in an ivory tower, Casey. Just deal with it."

"Not if you're going to play fast and loose with your safety!"

"You are such a hypocrite! What is that you're doing night after night?! No one asked you to be here, Casey! You still have your family! You don't belong here!"

Casey reeled back as if she had been slapped. The memory of the mushroom hallucination invaded her mind for a brief second. Quickly disguising her hurt, she growled, "Fine. Whatever. I'm out. Later O'Neil."

She stormed from the room and out of the Lair.

Four sets of concerned eyes watched her go.

"Well," said Mikey nervously looking at his brothers. "That doesn't sound good."

By an unspoken agreement, Raph disappeared into the shadows following Casey down the tunnel.

Donnie rubbed the back of his neck and then sighed.

"I'll go talk with April."

Mikey and Leo watched him go into the lab.

"Should we do anything?"

"I…honestly have no idea," admitted Leo feeling, like his brothers, very out of his depth.

April cursed under her breath and punched the pillow on Donnie's lab cot several times in frustration. Casey could just be so…so…stubborn sometimes. She was always so certain that she was right. She never thinks about these things and acts like April is her little sister or something sometimes.

April ignored the voice in the back of her head that pointed out that Casey knew she was capable and gave her more chances the others to fight. She was embarrassed and angry.

And feeling a bit left out. It just felt like Casey was going on patrol more and more with the guys lately. April was usually stuck at the Lair. This was the first time in a while that she had gone out on patrol and something like this happens.

It felt like Casey was taking away her friends. Which was stupid, Casey was her friend as well. She wouldn't do that.

But Casey was just human, too. Hell even more human then apparently April was. So she shouldn't be acting like she knows best. If she ever got in contact with the mutagen…

April shuddered trying not to think about her mushroom induced hallucination.

"April?"

Donnie's voice was coaxing and kind. The tone he usually took when she did something outside of the realm of his vastly limited experience. The guys were great, but they only had each other their whole lives.

Sometimes they were uncertain of how to deal with her in general.

"What?"

She winced at the sharp crack of her voice. Rubbing a hand over her eyes, she sighed.

"I'm sorry Donnie. It's not you that I'm mad at."

"I know," he said with a placating tone to her voice. Donnie pulled his medical box closer to him.

"I'm fine, Donnie," insisted April stubbornly.

"Let me be the judge of that, April. I still need to check you over."

"I don't need babying."

She felt that brief and familiar flash of annoyance go through her.

"It's not babying, April," Donnie said simply. He looked up at her with his reddish brown eyes. April raised an eyebrow in response.

Donnie sighed, "It really isn't. I do the same things with my brothers, with Casey, even with Sensei when he gets involved in the fights. We don't have easy access to medical care and Sensei has excellent first aid knowledge, but as we got older I was the one who took to studying it more."

"Then how come I'm usually first after a fight?"

Donnie's face flushed at the question. But he considered his answer carefully.

"No one wants to appear weak. Part of it is being a guy. But we're supposed to protect you, April. If it's not life threatening, then everyone will hold off getting checked over. Besides with the Kraang after you..." Donnie trailed off and rubbed the back of his neck. "We just need to know that you're being taken care of is all. It makes us all feel better."

"And Casey?" asked April.

Donnie paused before sighing.

"Casey is…different. She like Raph like that and doesn't want anyone to see her weak. She'll come in after your done and everyone else for me to look over her. Or she'll take care of herself at her home. She is probably used to patching herself up. I don't think anything less then a broken bone will get her to be looked at first. It's a pride thing, April."

"It sounds like a load of bull to me."

Donnie shrugged, "It's just the way some people are. Is that why you were angry at her?"

"No. She just…She just can be so frustrating sometimes. She throws herself into the fight but then gets mad when I joined. It feels hypocritical."

"It's hard for us, April. We know you're good but you haven't been doing this for as long as the rest of us. And we are as aware of that as we are of what the Kraang want from you. It's not a matter of trust. It's a matter of keeping a person we love safe. I worry about Leo, Raph, and Mikey every time we have to go out to fight. But I've trained alongside them since we were little. And Casey has been in fights since she was little, but you've been only doing this the past few months."

Donnie sat back and packed up his medical kit. He seemed to be gathering his thoughts before continuing.

"It's not an issue of trust, April. It's just being keenly aware of how short a time you've been doing this. We know you can take care of yourself. We just don't want you to risk yourself unnecessarily. Does that make sense?"

"I guess," April hedged. "It's just that whenever I bring it up, Casey mentions her time in fight clubs or how long she has been fighting. It's just annoying, like she's saying she is more capable then me."

"Maybe it's not for your benefit, but for hers. Casey is the only fully human member we have on the team. The Kraang have no use for her. Neither does the Foot. Maybe she's just reminding herself that she does belong here. It must be hard to come in like that with dynamics in play and carve out a spot for yourself. It may seem like she's over compensating because she kind of is," Donnie said carefully.

Carefully, almost tentatively, he reached out to take her hand. Looking in her face, Donnie seemed to know what she needed to hear.

"You know that Casey isn't replacing you right April? I mean it feels stupid to say it out loud. But you two are the only people around our age we ever interacted with. Both of you are our friends."

A small knot that had settled in her stomach slowly relaxed at the words. Donnie was always truthful about the really important things.

April gave Donnie a shaky smile. He did always know just how to hit the nail on the head.

She felt a bit ashamed now that her anger had subsided.

"I need to apologize," admitted April.

"Casey left to cool down. Raph went to talk with her or let her vent. I never know what those two when they get angry. Mainly Raph gets angry so this should be novel experience for him," Donnie blushed seeming to realize his babbling. "Anyway, I think it's best if you wait until the morning. Sometimes breathing room is good. Trust me it's how we solve some of our angrier conflicts."

"Must have happened a lot."

"That's what siblings do, fight. But deep down they love each other. Plus you need to remember Casey is a big sister. Older siblings have an annoying thing about always having to be right."

Donnie sounded like he was speaking from experience with either Leo, Raph, or both. Seeing the almost childish petulant expression on his face made April giggle.

Donnie smiled triumphantly.

Now if Raph was having as good of a talk with Casey then they were in business.

"You know those are bad for your health," Raph said by way of greeting.

Casey was on the roof of her building, settled comfortably on the ledge. A small, homemade first aid kit was next to her. In her hands, she was contemplating a pack of cigarettes with a furrowed brow. A lighter rested on her knee.

The older girl sighed, "Spare the lecture, Raph."

"I will if you don't smoke."

"I don't smoke. These were Nick's. I don't know why I don't throw these out."

"Nick as in your ex-boyfriend right?" asked Raph as he sat down on a empty space on the ledge next to Casey.

"Yeah. He smoked 'em. Clove cigarettes," she looked at the pack carefully. "After we broke up, I would light one up and let it burn so I could smell it. Made me think of him."

"Was this before or after he knocked up that girl?" Raph asked, remembering previous conversations. Late night talk while on Casey's bed, her laptop open and the both of them watching whatever movie or show Casey brought up on Netflix.

"Both," admitted Casey with a grimace. "Look it ain't easy turning on and off feelings like that. He was the first friend I ever had. And then we did the boyfriend, girlfriend thing. And that was just a mistake. Then after…I just did it when I felt lonely. Even though he's out of my life and the memories are more bitter then sweet. Part of me still recognizes the scent as comforting."

"Were you feelin' lonely?" Raph asked.

"A bit," Casey admitted. "Mainly I'm upset."

"Because you and April had a fight."

"You heard that, huh?"

"Parts of it. Not all of it. But you two were going at it when Donnie ducked out."

"Yeah. Sorry about that. It was just…"

Casey tried to voice it. That fear in her when she saw April running in yet again with her tessen out but unprotected. How that fear just bubbled over into anger.

"No. I get it," Raph said quietly.

A huff of laughter, "Yeah. Yeah I knew you would."

Casey smiled and pocketed the pack of cigarettes. Suddenly she didn't feel so alone.

Casey and Raph didn't talk after that. Sometimes their friendship didn't need words, especially when emotions were involved. They understood each other and how sometimes the fear and worry for those they loved would just boil over.

The pair sat in silence for a while until Raph got up and checked over Casey's injuries. Casey didn't protest, just allowed herself to be taken care of just for a bit.

"I'll apologize to Red in the morning. Give her some time to cool off. You know I think she can…"

"Yeah. Doesn't mean you don't worry about you."

"How do you turn that off?"

Raph sighed, "I don't. Not really. You would have to ask Leo about that kind of stuff."

Casey rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, "Yeah. I figured. It's my thing to get over."

Raph squeezed her shoulder gently, "It'll be fine, Case."

Casey smiled and hugged him gently. "That sounds like a lie."

Raph didn't say anything but hugged back.

Casey disappeared down to her room. Raph headed back to the Lair under the cover of the night.

April didn't want to deal with Casey's family right now. Not that the Joneses weren't nice people. It was just that she wanted to talk with Casey without them knowing about it.

So she shimmied up Casey's fire escape and knocked on her window instead.

It seemed like a good idea at the time, but April forgot how deeply Casey could sleep.

The dark lump under the covers moved after several moments then stopped. April groaned and knocked again, louder this time.

"Come on, Jones," she grumbled to herself.

The lump moved and Casey's dark head popped out. April could see her groan and crawl to the window.

Opening it, she looked outside.

"Oh. Hey Red."

"Hi Casey," mumbled April awkwardly. She felt a bit awkward after the things she said last night. "C-Can I come in?"

The older girl's brown eyes looked dazed, but were slowly gaining wakefulness.

"Yeah sure Red."

April ducked in, landing on Casey's bed easily. She dangled her booted feet off the edge so as to not dirty Casey's blankets.

The older girl looked at her: sleep mussed hair, old pajamas, and a couple of bandages from the fight last night. She had a few purpling bruises as well.

But other then that she looked good and more awake.

"So what's up, Red?"

"I…," April bit her lower lip nervously. "I just wanted to apologize Casey. I was…the things I said last night were uncalled for. I know you just worry about me. But you're my friend and I was just angry and upset. I felt like you were taking the guys away from me. I felt like I was useless. And I hate feeling like that."

Casey tilted her head to the side and nodded.

"Yeah I can understand that, Red. I haven't had a lot of friends either. And I guess I'm just making sure I belong. Provin' that I'm tough and can handle myself. After that spore thing, it's kind of gone into overdrive. I like the guys and I like you too. But let's face it. I'm nothin' special. But you are. And I just don't want those guys to get a hold of you, y'know?"

"Yeah," April said. "Yeah I know. But just trust that when I join a fight I do it because it's my choice and I do consider the options first."

A nod. "Okay. But just remember that it's hard for me to see people I care about getting hurt."

April nodded.

Casey looked a bit awkward like she did when anything with a hint of deeper emotional vulnerability reared its head.

"Is this the part where we hug?"

April didn't answer. She just tackled Casey into a hug instead.

The older girl laughed, caught her, and hugged her back.

That was when April knew that they would be okay.

A/N: Yeah I hope that came across as genuine. Like I said I am not good with confrontation both in real life and in my writing. But if I want to be a better writer then I need to work on it.

Next story is the Glitter Verse's take on "Of Rats and Men" which should be fun.

Also has everyone been keeping up with the episodes? It's totally crazy right? I'm loving Seth Green as Leonardo though. And the Invasion was one of the best episodes of the show. For further fangirling just got to my tumblr: hopenight. I just wanted to talk about it here real fast because I am so happy the show is back.

Although I should say that the Glitter Verse will only cover Season Two. When I get into season three that will be a different story series! Just incase anyone is curious at all. It's a long ways off.