''I built this for you. And some day you'll realize that it represents a whole lot more than people's inventions.''
Tony stared at the new atomic structure projected in front of him. He was right to think that the model of the Expo held some meaning to him. After bringing it home, scanning over all of the notes in his father's journal and making sure he wasn't going completely insane, he had made a projection of it all and pulled each piece apart until he had discovered something he didn't think possible. His father was right about being limited by the technology of his time. Tony had just found a new element.
''Dead for almost 20 years,'' Tony mused, looking at the word in front of him. ''Still taking me to school,''
All of this time he had been searching for an answer to save his life and his father had already figured it out decades ago. This whole time he was never going to find a cure and it was his office the whole time.
''The proposed element should serve as a viable replacement for palladium,'' Jarvis told him.
''Thanks dad,'' Tony spoke quietly.
''Unfortunately, it is impossible to synthesize,''
Tony stared at the element in his hands, the blue projection lighting up his face. Even with Jarvis telling him that it wasn't going to work, Tony knew he could do it. He had found his cure and he wasn't prepared to give up again now.
''Uh huh,'' Tony stood up, looking over to his robots. ''Get ready for major remodel, fellas. We're back in hardware mode,''
It was late afternoon when Logan debated whether she should really go and see Tony. She had told him she would think about it, and that usually meant a yes, but right now she didn't know what she wanted to do. She knew that they needed to talk, especially since she was planning on leaving in the morning, but she wasn't sure what to expect from him.
Tony had promised to tell her everything and although Logan desperately wanted to know what had caused him to act how he did the other night, but she was scared. She knew that it was going to be something big, but the possibilities for what was wrong were endless.
Logan took a deep breath and laid back on the bed, her hands resting on top of her large stomach and soothingly rubbing circles over it, smiling as she felt movements. They were going to be a happy family. The family that both of them wanted when they were growing up, but everything seemed so uncertain now. Logan didn't want to go to Seattle. She wanted to spend this time with Tony and have him by her side, but she had to do what was right for her son.
''You're gonna be okay,'' Logan whispered, her hands running over the bump. ''Everything's gonna be fine,''
Hours later, Logan had made her mind up.
Tony was down in the lab staring at the glowing blue triangle that he had just begun running tests on. He couldn't believe that it had worked, that he had found a new element and managed to create it, giving himself the cure he needed. It was going to take over from the palladium and save his life, but he had to wait for Jarvis to ensure it was safe. However Tony was beyond satisfied with the result. Months of worry and eventually giving up and becoming self-destructive all lead to this.
''Sir, Mrs Stark has arrived,''
Tony jumped at the A.I's voice, rushing to leave the workshop before Logan could reach the living room which was covered in shattered glass. He needed her to know he was serious this time when he said they would talk about things. Tony wasn't going to hold back or hide anything from her anymore, he was going to tell her everything just like she wanted.
When he made it up the stairs, Tony saw Logan closing the front door behind her and turning to meet his gaze. Tony always thought Logan was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on, but being without her for a few days made him miss looking at her. She was wearing blue jeans that clung to her skin just as the black tank top clung to her stomach, stretched over her bump and covered by a leather jacket.
''Hey,'' he smiled.
Logan gave him a light grin in return, but it was clear she wasn't as excited as he was to be meeting with one another again. Tony couldn't blame her at all for being mad at him especially after he had seen her twice after the party and still had explained nothing. But he wanted to make things right now, he wanted her to know why he had acted the way he did.
Tony watched as she looked around the room, her eyes widening at how much damage their was to the ground floor of their home. To make the new element that afternoon, Tony had to do a lot of renovations to their home. It was safe to say that wasn't one room that didn't have either a hole in the ground or the floor.
''I'll fix all of this,'' he assured her. ''I'm going to fix everything,''
Logan sighed and wondered if he actually meant it this time. He looked better now than the other times she had seen him, he seemed much more relaxed and almost impatient to talk to her. However before they began, Logan had to tell him what was going on. Whether he was going to tell her the truth or not, he had to know she was leaving.
''I have a ticket to Seattle for tomorrow,'' she told him. ''To my mom's,''
Tony's mouth fell open, his arms falling to his side.
''You're...you're leaving?''
''Tony I could have this baby any day now, I can't do it on my own,'' she explained. ''Whatever you're dealing with, if you can't or don't want to tell me what it is then that's your choice, but I can't keep doing this. For the past two days I've been thinking that I'm going to have to do this on my own and it terrifies me, I can't do it,''
Tony's heart almost broke at her words. She knew that it was because she thought Tony was abandoning her, but to Tony this was an insight into what it would have been like if the poison in his chest actually killed him. He didn't want to leave Logan to do this on her own, and hearing her admit to him that she couldn't do it alone made his stomach twist in knots.
''Logan,'' he shook his head, walking toward her. ''You won't be on your own. I know I haven't been there for you or him the past few days but I'm trying to fix it and I'm gonna tell you everything, I want to explain it all to you. The only reason I've been hiding it is because I love you so much, you have no idea. The idea of you doing this alone, my son not having a father, it kills me. I have been trying to protect you for months and I've pushed you further away in the past two days than I ever wanted to. Please, don't go to Seattle,''
Logan had tears in her eyes now. She could see how much Tony loved her and how much he wanted to fix things, but now she was even more terrified about what was going on that he was hiding from her. Her emotions were all over the place right now and it didn't help to have Tony pleading with her like this when she had had such a hard time making the decision to do what was best for their son.
''Please,'' Tony said again, walking closer. ''Don't leave Logan, I'm begging you. I can't be without you. I know I screwed up but you just can't leave me. I'll be with you through everything from now on, I'll be with you when our son is born and then forever after that. Just let me explain everything to you. Please,''
Tony was close enough that he put his arms on her waist now and she didn't move away, she welcomed his touch. She had missed him so much over the past few days even after everything he did. He was her husband and she loved him more than anything, she didn't want to leave, she didn't want to do any of this without him.
''I don't want to,'' Logan shook her head, looking at him with eyes that filled with tears. ''But whatever you're involved in-''
''It's over,'' Tony shook his head. ''It's gone now,''
Logan watched him carefully, trying to understand.
''I don't know what it was to begin with,''
''I'm going to tell you,'' he nodded. ''But you're not gonna like it. That whole reason I didn't tell you was because I couldn't stand it if you knew,''
''You're scaring me,'' she shook her head. ''This whole thing is scaring me,''
Tony sighed and moved his eyes down to his shirt. The only way he was going to be able to explain everything to her was by just showing her. He grabbed the bottom of his shirt and pulled it up over his chest, holding it up around his neck as Logan watched with curiosity. It took a few moments for her to realize what Tony was trying to show her and he watched her with a nervous gaze as she stared at the arc reactor.
His skin was bruised all around it and there were black lines crawling up to his neck all from the reactor. Logan didn't understand what was going on, but it was clear that the arc reactor wasn't supposed to be doing that to him.
''W-what's wrong?'' she asked, her hands reaching out and tracing around the circle in his chest. ''Tony this looks bad,''
It made sense to her now that she hadn't actually seen Tony without his shirt in quite some time, but it had slipped past her so easily.
''It is bad,'' Tony told her. ''This is what I've been hiding from you. The palladium in my chest was poisoning me. It was the only thing keeping the arc reactor going but it was also...''
Logan looked up at him with wide, worried eyes.
''It was killing me,'' he admitted. ''Well, it still is but-''
''Killing you?'' Logan gasped. ''You're...dying?''
Tony saw her anger coming now.
''Well, yes and no. Yes it's killing me so technically I am dying but I've found a new element that's going to fix it-''
''This thing is killing you right now,'' Logan cut him off with a loud voice. ''And you haven't told me? You've been hiding it from me? All these months?''
''I didn't want you to worry,''
Logan used all of the force she had to hit against Tony's shoulders, pushing his back and taking him by surprise.
''You ass!'' she hit him again repeatedly. ''Why didn't you tell me!''
Tony carefully tried to block her attacks, but he figured he did deserve some of them. She was angry and upset and for a good reason, but he couldn't let her get too worked up.
''Logan,'' he gently grabbed her arms. ''Hey, just relax,''
''Relax? You're dying Tony,'' she shook her head, tears falling down her cheeks now. ''Why wouldn't you tell me that?''
''I couldn't watch it kill you too,'' he told her. ''I couldn't see you break. I love you so much, I couldn't do that to you,''
''And you think keeping me in the dark, waking up one morning and finding you...that'd be better?''
Tony couldn't stand the gut wrenching feeling that was going on inside him right now. He didn't like hearing her so upset, hearing her cry over the fact that she was going to lose him.
''I should have told you,'' he agreed, his hands caressing her cheeks. ''But I couldn't. I wanted to find a cure, find a way to fix it before I told you and I have Logan,''
Logan put her hands around his neck and pulled him close, burying her face into him and sobbing. It was bad enough that her emotions were all over the place right now but this news had just devastated her. Tony was dying and had been suffering all of these months and she didn't know anything about it. If she lost him, she didn't know how she would survive on her own. She couldn't raise their child without him, she couldn't see a life without him and that scared her because everything was so vulnerable now.
''It's okay,'' Tony told her in a soothing voice, rubbing her back. ''I'm okay, everything's going to be fine I promise,''
''I can't lose you,'' she told him in between her shaky breaths. ''I can't do it Tony,''
''You won't lose me,'' he assured her. ''I'm not going anywhere. I'll be always with you, remember?''