Shinsuke had a sister.

Who would have ever thought of such thing?

Takasugi Shinsuke had a sister.

Takasugi Shineko is her name.

Shineko... What kind of name is that?

I glared at Sougo who slept right in front of me with his stupid eye-cover thingy over his eyes.

"WAKE UP YOU!" I yelled with all my might.

"What do you want, Hijikata-san?" he answered like nothing in this world is wrong, "I'm trying to sleep."

My grip on my knees tightened.

I. hate. him.

"You're supposed to be working! Not sleeping!"

"It's a Sunday, Hiijikata-san-"

"It's a MONDAY, you stupid ass!"

"Oh... well, Jimmy is working for me so I'm okay."

"Good. Then we both can go over to Yorozuya."

"Yorozuya?" Sougo sat up and took his eye-cover thing off and sat up. "Is it because...?"

"Yeah..." I crossed my arms over my chest. "She's with Takasugi but we have no, absolutely no information about her."

"Well, this is going to be fun."

"It's all you're fault!"

My fault?

"Now Shinsuke would never come back!"

Was it my fault?

The room was filled with my father's yelling at me and my mother's sobs.

This was all my fault.

Shinsuke left to become a real Jouishishi because of me.

It was few days later when my father started hitting my mother.

It continued for hours until he started raping her and finishes up then everything would be done for the day.

But the same thing would happen the next day. And the next day. And the day after that.

I would always hear my mother's scream from anywhere and everywhere my father would abuse her.

It doesn't matter...the time and place.

Sometimes it happened while the three of us would be eating dinner. He wouldn't care if I was right in front of them.

He would start hitting her and then rape her right in front of me.

I tried stopping from it to happen, but every time I tried, he would throw me against a wall and continue on with my mother.

After I realized that I wouldn't be able to stop from it to happen, I stopped trying.

I just watched it happen and waited until it ended.

My mother screamed for my help; begged for my help but I never did. It was useless. I wouldn't be able to help her.

It was when I was 10 years old.

I found out that my mother, during the day when my father was working and was not home, would bring a young man to the house and have it with him.

She acted like she wasn't getting abused by her husband, at all, and she hid all her bruises and cuts with make up.

The man was always the same man.

One day, I killed the man and my mother. With my katana Shouyou Sensei gave me.

For no reason, though.

Since my brother and his friends left me here in this stinking world, I had to stay home, doing nothing.

And since I was at home, every day, I would hear my mother and her lover having sex during the day.

I hated to hear the stupid moanings.

I hated hearing what I could hear while they were 'in heaven'.

I hated what my mother would tell her lover.

'Only if I had met you before I had met my husband,' she would say to her lover while they were having it, 'then I wouldn't have had such stupid kids and I wouldn't have had to hide everything from my husband. Like the fact that the younger one is your kid... I love you... I love you so much...'

I killed her and her lover while they were having sex.

I sliced each of their heads off, first, and cut both of them in half, not caring about the blood that splattered on me.

My father... or the person I've called my father for the last 10 years, came home and found me standing, covered with the blood of my actual father and my mother. When he saw me, he dropped to his knees and scooted away from me like I was some kind of a monster.

I smiled at him, wickedly, and turned fully around to face him.

He looked absolutely afraid at... me? Me, isn't it?

Something inside me clicked and I felt very... weird. I felt very... happy? excited? about how much he was afraid of me.

So I killed him.

Killing him... Killing a person was absolutely amazing.

But that feeling was... The one that was feeling that wasn't me... But it was me at the same time. No, it is is me.

I murdered my parents.

After that happened, I couldn't stop killing people.

It was even better than getting an ice cream from some one.

I continued killing random people until I met Shinsuke, again. He had asked me to join the Joi War with him and his friends.

And I said yes, of course.

Again, I killed many Amantos there.

I wasn't fighting for my country.

I wasn't killing those Amantos for my country.

I was doing it so I would feel the sensation... So I wouldn't start aching to kill people again.

But the aching stopped when Gintoki told me about his feelings about how he didn't want those Amantos to take over the country.

It was the same night that I had fallen in love with him.

The next day, I had changed the way of fighting those Amantos.

Gintoki was behind me with Katsura and I was behind them with Tatsuma and Shinsuke.

We were back to back, keeping from each other to get hurt.

Few months later, I had told Gintoki how I had felt and we actually started 'dating'. But we never did such thing a normal couple would do.

We were both Samurais.

We live and die for the country.

Not for each other.

Well, I had lived and was going to die for Gintoki.

That was how much I loved him until... he told me that he hated me.

He told me that never wanted me.

He told me that he was just using me.

Yes, we never did anything a normal couple would do but I never said we never had our alone time and talked to each other.

I loved those time until... those loving memories shattered and he ruined everything.

I tried to kill him.

But I didn't have enough guts to do it.

That was the same day I had 'died' in front of my mates.

I had been slaughtered by an Amanto.

But I didn't die.

They 'burned' my body but that wasn't really my body.

I had made a fake one and put it inside of the coffin I had been in, before I was really burned.

The body was a lady I had killed few days before I had dyed her hair purple with some stuff you wouldn't want to know and made her look like me and cover her with her blood so no one would know the difference between the two of us. The lady was part of the medical people who I could care less about.

After I had watched 'my body' get burned, I immediately left the city Edo and went to Kyouto.

I lived there for years until I had heard the news about Kamui and Shinsuke.

I met up with Matako while I was on my way to Harusame's main base.

Even then, I kept killing random people. I killed people when I felt like it.

Matako was lucky that she didn't meet me when I was in that stage.