Hey y'all, I'm back! Sorry this took forever, this year has been INSANE! Even the summer has been! Agh it took me forever to get online and post this, but it's been written for weeks! AGH!P.S. I DO NOT and never have owned Glee, on account of I really didn't like season 3 which wouldn't be the case it it was mine.

April's POV
It's been a few weeks and I'm actually still living in Will's apartment. I told him I'd go a few times but he really wants me to stay. Things have gotten a little calmer since I just showed up but I still get nightmares every night. I always wake up screaming and fighting someone who isn't there. Will thinks I should talk to someone, but I still don't want to.

Will has been insisting that I sleep on the bed and he takes the couch but I always get the urge to just get on the couch and snuggle up to him. Some nights I actually do, some nights I don't. I can tell he doesn't always want me there with him but he knows it makes me feel better so he just let's me stay. I always have less vivid nightmares when I'm with him.

I still don't know what I'm gonna do about the baby, though. I've been trying to stay sober to keep it healthy, but there are some nights, especially after a vivid night terror, that it's hard not to just find a bottle or two and drink those memories away.

The bigger problem is just what I'm gonna do about it. Abortion is already ruled out, I can't bring myself to do it. I just don't know if I wanna keep it or put it up for adoption. Raising it myself would be hard, especially with the history I have, but then I'd get to have it around… Will might even wanna help me.

No, he wouldn't, I'm not worth it.

Actually he probably would, but I really just don't think I'm worth helping. I'm just another Lima loser in this little cowtown that never did anything with my life. At least Will did something, he brought back Glee and is trying to make it big again. He's been teaching kids to believe in themselves when meanwhile I'm in a cheap bar sipping a martini and flirting with the nearest man that still has a pulse.

I guess I just don't wanna teach this kid to waste its life like I wasted mine. I could've been a star, I could've been on Broadway, with a bunch of albums and maybe a Tony award. Instead, I dropped outta school and never got the time of day. Now I'm just another drunk, singing her heart out on karaoke night at the bar. I don't want this baby living like that.

I wouldn't wish my life on anyone, especially my own kid. When you live like me, you feel small and pathetic, which just makes you more depressed so you drink more which makes you feel even more pathetic, so you just drink more which again makes you feel more pathetic. So you just end up drinking vodka or shots or beer or whatever until you can't see straight and all your troubles feel like they're miles away. Well, until morning. Then everything just comes crashing back down on you like a ton of bricks, which it literally feels like with the hangover in mind.

I'm still thinking about all these things when Will comes into the room with some ice cream. I've been craving it every day so Wil bought this huge bin of it so I can just have some there when I want it. I scoot over on the couch to make room for him as he sits next to me and hands me a bowl of Moose Tracks ice cream. (Which, by the way, is the most delicious flavor EVER! I hadn't had it until Will got me some and now it's what I'm always craving!) Yes, I did just make a reference to Kristin Chenoweth's favorite ice cream. She literally tweeted about it for weeks!

The TV is still on but I haven't been paying much attention to what's actually playing. I picked some random movie but I wasn't really paying attention to which. It doesn't really make much difference to me what we watch since I'm always distracted, but I picked Will's favorite musical so he can still enjoy it at least.

As I slide over to the corner of the couch and put my feet up on the coffee table I start eating my ice cream when I hear someone at Will's door. Who it is, I have no idea considering it's about nine thirty at night.

I look at Will.

"I'll get it," he tells me, getting off the couch and going to the door. "Emma?"

Emma? Here? Why?! As quickly as I can, I hop off the couch and practically toss my ice cream onto the table. And here I thought was gonna get a nice relaxing night… I just wanted to curl up with my ice cream and watch a movie. There goes that plan.

"Uhm, hi…" I say as I get to the door looking confused.

"So she is here," Emma says in an angry, accusing tone with a sharp look toward Will. Wait, what? How does she even know I'm here?

"Emma, you don't need need to get mad about this…" Will tells her, trying to calm her down, but she's beyond calming.

"I should've just listened to her, but I didn't!" Emma yells, "She said you were still going beind my back with April but I just wouldn't believe you'd do that to me but look, she's right here! In your apartment!" she takes a quick look at me and turns back to Will. "It's yours, isn't it?!" she demands.

Oh… wait… I look down and run a hand across my stomach, only to feel a baby bump beginning to form. It's still small, but it's definitely visible in the tight camisole and sweats I'm wearing… which are Will's.

Dammit, I need to stop wearing this tight clothes all the time, I think as I keep looking at my stomach, its getting to be a problem. Even if I barely noticed a growing baby bump. Jeez you'd think I woulda noticed that. I guess I just didn't really think about that since it was so gradual. It's kinda just been there but I didn't think about it since it didn't show enough.

"No! It's not!" Will exclaims, looking taken aback by this conclusion Emma somehow lept to.

"Why else would she be here? If I'm right, she's probably as far along as it's been since you last saw her!" Emma snaps, "You slept together!"

I snap out of my clothing thoughts as I hear this. Does she really think we did that? We literally did just sleep!

"Um, actually we didn't…" I murmur, not quite loud enough to hear.

"What?" Emma snaps. Jeez those redhead stereotypes aren't that far off…

"W-Will and I didn't have sex…" I repeat, a slight stutter making its way out. "We never have." As much as I'll admit I tried to get him to… but I don't plan on saying that around a pissy ginger…

"Emma I already talked to you about this before, months ago!" Will exclaims, "You already yelled at me about this but April and I never did anything! Sue was just making up more rumors!"

Oh, God, that explains EVERYTHING! Sue hates Will to no end and I'm really getting the feeling she believes she can literally walk on me, which she has tried to do, and that I will make out with anything male that has a pulse. (Okay, fine, sometimes that is the case, but only when I'm at my worst points in my life. Dark days…)

"How can I tell you're not lying?" she says skeptically.

Will opens his mouth to say something but I stop him by cutting in before he can speak. I'm pretty sure I know what he's gonna say and that's the last thing I wanna tell anyone, especially an angry ginger that sees me as… I don't know what she sees me as. Competition? An enemy? A whore? (Okay, probably that…)

"You can't," I say, "But you have to trust me when I say that he hasn't been anything but a friend to me and we've never gone any farther than that… though I'll admit I tried—but he said no."

"What about that drinking problem you have? I've never seen you sober! Ever!"

"Bambi," I begin, using the name for her I know she hates, "Do I seem drunk to you?"

"Well-" I cut her off.

"I can't even drink anyways, as you've already pointed out."

"April…" Will stops me, giving me that, shut up and let me deal with it, look. I hate that look, but I comply and shut it.

"Will, I just don't know what to think of this right now," Emma sighs, "April's living in your place and I just can't help but think that kid she's having is yours with all those times I've seen you around her and letting her live in your house wearing your clothes doesn't help either…"

"We're just friends, Emma," Will reassures her again. "I already called you a while ago about this. She came to me because she didn't have somewhere to stay and I don't think she deserves to be thrown out onto the streets, no matter what she's done."

Wow, that's the nicest thing anybody's said about me… most people treat me like a regular slut on the streets and say terrible stuff about and to me. I try to just brush it off but I can't say that it doesn't hurt a little when people call me a whore or tell me what a nobody I am because I never got to be a star. Will has always been the one to tell me that I can still have hope, and saying that I still deserve a home is just about the sweetest thing I've ever heard.

"Will, I just don't know. I have to think about this…" Emma says, looking at him, and I can just tell that she still thinks we did something. "I'm just gonna go. But please, find April somewhere else to live. Just not with you." with that, Emma walks away. Down the hall and out of my sight.

I look at Will, who still seems a little surprised she showed up. "Maybe I should go…" I begin, but Will cuts me off.

"Just ignore her," he says. "We both still know nothing actually happened and you still need somewhere to live."

"I'll find somewhere, Will, I always do…" I murmur, "It's not that hard to pick up another-"

"Do you really wanna do that again?" he asks, "Live on bar randoms and just hope they don't hurt you?"

"It's still an option…" I reply, not thinking.

"April, you're still pregnant. You can't drink."

"I wouldn't actually drink anything!" I explain, "I just hang out inside until someone gets drunk enough to think I'm pretty and take me home with them."

"I still don't like it, April," Will sighs. "It just doesn't sound safe to me."

"You'd understand that nothing is safe if you lived on my side of things."

"You still have me," he says, "And I don't have to get drunk to think you're pretty."

I sigh. "What about the rumors?"

"We'll get around them. Right now just calm down and we can go back to our movie and ice cream."

At the thought of ice cream I finally give in and plop back down on the couch, looking for my bowl but it's all melted, of course. When is someone like me ever gonna get to just sit down with a big bowl of ice cream and relax?

Never, my mind tells me.

Guys, seriously, REVIEW! It's not that difficult! They don't even use a button anymore on the computers, so you don't get any excuses! Just type your thoughts in the little box! It ain't rocket science!

Here, I'll help you! Follow the stars!

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