Disclaimer: Merely a work of fandom.

Author's Note: Wow, what do you know... I've updated this story after almost six years. I recently logged onto my now-defunct email address that was linked to my account and saw all these review and follow alerts. I read through each one of them and was so touched that I felt compelled to revisit this story. Fortunately, I try to never delete any of my work and I found the remains of this story in one of my folders, complete with characterizations, plot notes and half-written chapters. I wanted to continue this story for the readers that I had disappointed but I wasn't sure I'd be able to, having been so detached from the Gundam Seed fandom for so many years, so I went back and watched a couple of episodes and amazingly, the Gundam Seed Destiny ending once again left me so dissatisfied that I picked up the figurative pen again and got to work. If you are reading this story and liked it, please leave me a note. It'd really help motivate me to continue writing.

A New Dawn

Chapter 5

Distance

by tarot-flair

Cagalli leaned heavily against the door of her bathroom, her heart still pounding rapidly from her first meeting with Athrun ever since the war had ended. She had often thought of what she would say to him when and if she ever met him again but all her carefully chosen words had left her the instance she looked into those precious, emerald eyes. She had thought herself slightly older and wiser but the moment she saw him again, all the old, confusing feelings of inadequacy, fear and fragility had returned as strongly as before. With him, all she could remember was of her young, naïve and inept self. She had wanted to throw herself into his arms, beg him to stay with her again and protect her from the world.

Heaving a deep breath, she shook her head hard and blinked away the tears in her eyes. Oh my god, have I not grown up in the slightest bit?! She had not realized how easily her resolve could be shaken. When she had watched the Archangel depart into space, she had known very well that Athrun and her could never be together. She was Uzumi Nara Athha's daughter, Orb's Princess, and she was a woman with a lifetime of obligations and responsibility. There was no room for her personal desires and Athrun deserved so much more. When she met Meyrin, she had known immediately that she would be the girl who would always put Athrun first, who would follow doggedly after him through any danger and who would sacrifice everything to be with him. Even if it had broken her heart, she had known that Meyrin would be better for him.

"Cagalli! Are you done? You better be or I'm coming in right now damn it! I told you to let me change your bandages for you! How the hell are you going to do it on your own!"

Her bathroom door visibly shuddered on its hinges from Shinn's loud yells.

"Don't you dare come in! I'm almost done!" Fearfully looking at the door and expecting Shinn to barge in at any given moment, Cagalli hastily unwrapped the bandages from her shoulder, reapplied a thick layer of the healing ointment on her wound and wrapped a fresh layer of bandages over it.

"I'm giving you one more minute!"

"Yes I'm almost done! Argh shut up and leave me alone!" Despite their reconciliation, Shinn still retained his innate ability to instantly rouse her ire. She adjusted the sleeve of her blouse to strategically cover most of the awful-looking bandage and looked into the mirror. Her cheeks were still flushed. She splashed cool water over her face and took a deep breath.

There's no avoiding it anyway.

Lunch was a casual affair of sandwiches and soda in Cagalli's private office. It was completely soundproof and ever since the second assassination attempt six months ago, Cagalli had insisted that her trusted personal retinue of guards make a bug sweep daily.

"Do you have any idea who would have wanted you dead?" Kira ignored the freshly-made club sandwich on his plate and affixed a serious gaze on his twin sister.

"At the last count, I think it was about one thousand and two people. Of course, there might have been a few more after the announcement that I had signed a mobile-suit reduction treaty with the Republic of East Asia." Cagalli said flippantly, taking a small sip of soda. "Everyone just assumes that the mighty Orb is simply taking advantage of the militarily weaker East Asian Federation by proposing that they reduce their weapons production."

"This isn't a time to be making jokes! Do you know how news of your assassination attempt has destabilized international relations? The allies that have signed all those peace treaties and arms-reduction agreements with Orb did it based on the absolute trust that they held in you and your principles for peace. With your Council's rash announcement of war, all that trust has disintegrated and they are now fearful that a sudden change of leadership would immediately erase all of Orb's promises."

"She's not really that far off the mark though. As you mentioned, Cagalli stands as Orb's symbol for peace. There really isn't a shortage of people who would want her dead or conveniently gone." It was the first time that Shinn had spoken up since the group had arrived from PLANT. Athrun took a closer look at him and was more than slightly startled at the changes in the boy. Was this really the same wild-eyed, uncontrollable boy just a year ago? The red eyes were still as fiery as before but now the fire was carefully banked, his dark hair was as unkempt and tousled as ever but the constant tension that used to wrap around him had completely left his body, and he sat relaxed in a casual poise. There was a familiarity in the way he sat right next to Cagalli and in the matter-of-fact way that he had produced spare napkins from the bottom drawer of her desk. It was downright odd and Athrun didn't know if he felt comfortable with it. Weren't they mortal enemies just a year ago?

"You mean there were other assassination attempts?" Kira's voice was quietly calm but Athrun knew him better.

"Just a couple but with me around and Ki …" Shinn paused uncomfortably in mid-word. "I mean Cagalli is well-protected in Orb. I should have followed her to Eurasia."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Isn't this all part and parcel of being a public symbol and leader? I'm sure Lacus has had her fair share of death threats. The point is that until now, there hasn't been any real damage done." Until now, Kisaka had always been right by her side.

"That's bullshit Cagalli. Have you ever considered what would have happened if they had succeeded? All your hard work for the last few years would simply be for nothing. We will find this assassin and you will take more precautions to ensure your safety." Kira's voice, usually so gentle, was hard and brooked no argument.

"Tell us what happened and we can go from there." Dearka piped up, in a vain attempt to break the somber mood in the room.

Reluctantly, Cagalli began relating the whole debacle; from the time she had stepped off her helicopter and was strangely greeted by a military general instead of the President of the Eurasian Federation, to the ensuing gun fight in the hangar, and finally to the mysterious woman who had almost killed her.

"… I'm only alive because she allowed me to escape…" Tears of humiliation burned at the back of her eyes. So many brilliant lives sacrificed for hers and she had still been at the utter mercy of her enemy. She twirled the dial of her safe and removed a standard Orb military-issued pistol, "This was the gun that she used. She might have simply taken it from one of… the bodies of our men… but she felt strangely familiar. Her hand-to-hand combat skills are very similar to what is taught in our military training. There was no hesitation at all, she's very skilled."

Cagalli looked around the room, taking in the pained faces. A traitor, a betrayal among their own ranks.

"However, she's definitely not the mastermind. I'm not entirely sure how she ties in with the Eurasian trap. She seemed to be operating on her own. The Eurasian forces didn't hesitate to shoot at her and she fled at the sight of them." Cagalli impatiently ran her fingers through her hair. She had been so busy that she had not even realized how long it had grown. The golden strands extended halfway down her back and if Cagalli had been the type of girl to linger in front of a mirror, she would have noticed how feminine it made her look… and promptly find the time to cut it off. But as it was, her daily schedule for the past year had been so full that she had taken to dividing her time into fifteen minute blocks.

"What was the Eurasian government's response?"

Cagalli instinctively turned to look directly at Athrun to answer his question and immediately realized it was a big mistake. She felt completely naked and vulnerable when those emerald eyes were so intently focused on her.

"The President of the Eurasian Federation called first thing this morning. He apologized profusely and claimed that he knew nothing about it! He was literally stammering on the phone. If he was just putting on an act, he's a damn good actor. He claims that he was told that my flight was delayed and that I would be arriving an hour later than our agreed time. The admiral that informed him of the delay is currently missing. He also said that they are conducting their own investigations and… the strangest thing is that every single member of the Eurasian Elite force is accounted for. I definitely recognize their uniforms and both Kisaka and I were so certain that we were attacked by their Elites. In the exchange of fire, we easily killed at least 40 or more men. Yet, the President told me that not a single body was found in the hangars! If what he says is true, my enemy is unimaginably powerful. To be able to mobilize hundreds of men and secretly remove all the mobile suits from a sector hangar right under the nose of the Eurasian military would require an immense amount of power and money… it shouldn't be that difficult to locate someone capable of that."

"Someone who has powerful connections in both Eurasia and Orb. Someone who would stand to gain if you were out of the picture. What about that Seiran fellow who seems to be next in line if you were out of the picture?"

"He does seem like the most likely suspect, doesn't he? So likely that I'm inclined to give him the benefit of the doubt. He's rash and flamboyant and hardly a pacifist but despite his unfortunate heritage, until yesterday, he has always agreed with Orb's neutral stance. But yes, I agree that he will need to be investigated."

"Athrun and I will cover that. I'll need authority to tap his phone lines and access his network systems. Give us a list of suspects and we can start as soon as today." Kira chimed in.

"There's no need for you to do that, Kira. I appreciate it; I really appreciate all of you coming here today." Cagalli's eyes swept the room, taking in all the familiar faces, some of whom were enemies and were now comrades. "But Orb can settle its own problems and besides, Lacus needs you in PLANT, Kira."

"Cagalli! This is no time to pretend to be strong! Who would you even trust in Orb to carry out these investigations? I'm just a call away if Lacus needs me, you know she will understand."

"I know she will understand but more than most, I also know that she needs you. You'll never forgive yourself if anything happened to her and you were not there. Go home, Kira. I still have people I can trust here in Orb."

"And just who are these people that you can trust? The ones who scheduled your flight into Eurasia? The ones who have been secretly exporting Orb military equipment? Or were you referring to the ones who leaked news of your assassination to your Council as soon as you were thought dead?" Kira's eyes glittered dangerously, his voice uncharacteristically tense. Over the course of a relatively young but eventful life, few things fazed Kira anymore but the safety of his last remaining family was one of them.

"I have been handling Orb's affairs all by myself for the last year. I'm not that child anymore." That familiar gleam of stubbornness had settled over her amber eyes. "If I've had five assassination attempts and god knows how many death threats in the past year, I don't doubt that Lacus has had at least as many. You'll never forgive yourself if something happened while you were here." Cagalli's words, ringing with finality, had struck home.

"I'd never forgive myself too if anything happened to you." Kira said quietly.

"You can't always protect everyone." Cagalli smiled affectionately, if a little sadly, at her twin. She knew how protective Kira was of her. She was family, but Lacus was the one who would spend the rest of her life with this silly, protective twin of hers. Lacus was the one who held his sanity together at the end of the first war and through the second. She would be forever thankful and would gladly take a backseat to that.

"We'll go visit Mu, Murrue and the others later and you can take the shuttle back tomorrow." Cagalli said cheerily in an attempt to break the atmosphere of solemnity that had settled over the room.

"Let Athrun stay here at least." Kira said suddenly. "It'd make me feel better and you can definitely use his help."

Cagalli looked up from the sandwich that she had been about to begin eating, startled. Before she had a chance to think of a plausible reason to refuse, Athrun had already spoke up.

"Gladly."

Her head whipped around and amber eyes clashed with an implacable wall of emerald green. Whether it was from instinct or experience, Cagalli knew that this would be a much harder foe than her brother to move.

"I'm trusting you with her, Athrun." Kira said sternly and just like that, her fate was sealed.

The next morning saw the rag-tag group gathered together at the space shuttle departure terminal. It had been decided, with very little consideration of Cagalli's opinion, that Athrun would stay on in Orb. Apparently, Meyrin was also staying on in Orb on the pretext of being on vacation and wanting to spend some time with her sister, Luna. Again, nobody asked Cagalli. She ought to feel a little miffed that as Chief Representative of a rather powerful nation, she had so little say in her own affairs. At least, she had managed to persuade Kira to return to PLANT and Lacus. Much to his chagrin, Dearka too would be returning to PLANT on the orders of his superior, Yzak Joule.

"Congratulations on the engagement, younger brother." Cagalli reached up to give Kira a quick hug, startled at the unexpected height difference that almost had her on tiptoes. She hadn't quite realized but it would appear that in the past year, Kira's growth in height had been far outpacing her own. It made it just that much harder to insist that he was the younger brother when she barely reached up to his shoulders.

"I'll be back in Orb as soon as Lacus clears her current travel schedule. We'll have our wedding and you'll be her maid of honor as soon as everything settles down. Take care of yourself, little sister." Kira returned the hug and grinned at her, resisting the urge to ruffle her hair.

"Who's the little sister here?!" Cagalli said indignantly, the protest so second-nature, it was almost a reflexive action. But her retort lacked the usual bite and Kira knew that she, too, was aware of how serious the situation was.

He turned to Athrun and his tone became somber. "Keep her out of trouble, all right?"

"Final call for Shuttle 702 to Aprilius One, departure in approximately eight minutes. All passengers please head to Gate A3 now."

"That would be you, Kira. Don't worry about me." Cagalli gave him a gentle shove towards the gate. "Send my regards to my sister-in-law!" Cagalli's exuberance died down as soon as Kira and Dearka turned the corner and went out of sight. She stared after them for a moment, feeling just that bit bereft but this was no time to be feeling sorry for herself. She had bigger problems, namely in the manifestation of one blue-haired, green-eyed man who had the tendency to turn her world upside down whenever he appeared.

The three of them, Cagalli, Athrun and Meyrin, began walking towards the car. Shinn had wanted to send Kira off too but with Kisaka gone, his work had nearly doubled and he hadn't been able to come.

It was Meyrin who finally broke the awkward silence that had settled over the trio. "I'm going to visit Luna; I don't think she even knows that I'm here on Orb. I'll meet you back at the mansion." Meyrin's eyes flickered from Athrun to Cagalli and for a brief moment, it looked like she was about to say more, but her hesitation disappeared almost as quickly as it had appeared and she gave a small smile, waving as she left.

Athrun and Cagalli continued to the car in silence, Cagalli quickly reaching out to open the passenger door before Athrun could do it for her. For a brief second, their hands bumped and Cagalli felt like a bucket of cold water had just been emptied on her head, or that an electric current had just passed through her body. What cruel irony that the briefest touch had been enough to send her reeling when she had shared so much more with this man.

Ever the gentleman, Athrun backed away from the door and allowed her to open it herself and walked around to the driver's seat.

"Athha Manor?" He asked levelly.

"Oh no, you can just drop me off at Civil Defense Headquarters. I have a meeting later."

"I'll go with you."

"No, that's fine. I'll just have the driver pick me up later in the evening."

Athrun's fingers clenched imperceptibly around the steering wheel. "Do you realize just how much danger you are in? Even if it is in Orb? Do you have any idea what would happen to the world if something were to happen to you?" The world would collapse. My world would collapse.

"Athrun, you are not Alex Dino anymore." Cagalli's voice was an uncharacteristic soft whisper. "You don't have to be him anymore."

"No, I'm not trying to act like your bodyguard. I'm just worried about you."

"Don't be." Her voice was flat and without emotion. If there was just one trait that characterized Cagalli, it was that she had never been good at hiding her emotions. That had changed obviously. "I've been taking care of myself all this time. Don't come back and presume to know better than I do."

Don't come back and make me feel like that lost, little girl again. The girl who had allowed herself to be moved like a pawn.

"I'm sorry. I never intended to make you feel that way." An overwhelming sense of tightness surrounded his chest as he recalled her look of desperate pleading when he had met Kira and her after the battle of Dardanelles, with the help of Mirialla. She had been lost and he had left her in the time of her greatest need and the little girl had had to grow up.

Given Athrun's penchant for speeding, the usual one-hour drive was easily accomplished in forty minutes. Cagalli had fully expected a sense of relief to see the grey walls of the Civil Defense Headquarters looming in front of her but inexplicably, a sense of regret seized her as she made a move to get out of the car.

However, before she could do that, Athrun unexpectedly seized her wrist, "Wait, Cagalli."

She twisted around to look at him in astonishment, her eyes drifting to his hand that still took hold of her wrist. She wondered if he could feel her rapidly accelerating pulse as well as she could hear her pounding heartbeat in her ears. She really hoped not.

"I have something of yours," he reached into his pocket, turned her hand over and placed a small object into the palm of her hand.

The intricate silver ring, with a Haumea stone as centerpiece, had been his last gift to her.

Her breath caught in her throat, Cagalli stared up at him wordlessly.

Athrun reached into the collar of his shirt and pulled out the necklace that he constantly wore. "Remember this? I've always worn it and I think it is why I'm still here. When I commissioned your ring, I had hoped it would protect you like your necklace did me."

"Even if," he paused and hurt flickered in his emerald depths, "even if you no longer have feelings for me, I still hope that it will keep you safe. It was meant for you."

Cagalli had long thought her heart broken beyond repair when she finally saw that there would be no future for Athrun and her but seeing the play of emotions on his sharply-angled face, she felt her heart lurch and began to bleed afresh.

"I don't deserve it. I gave it to Meyrin." She finally said, through the painful lump in her throat.

Athrun's only answer was to fold her palm firmly over the ring, his larger hand enveloping hers for a brief second until he released her hand entirely.

"It was meant only for you." He said quietly.

Clutching the ring to her chest, Cagalli hurriedly got out of the car, putting as much distance as she could between them, before he could notice the tears that threatened to fall.