I know it's been a very long time since I last updated. I'm so sorry about the hiatus, life just sort of happened and I've been busy. For those of you still with me lets recap. So I brought in the guy who always does the recaps on cartoons like Pokémon and Avatar.
"TONY STARK IS THROWING A FABULOUS PARTY BUT THERE IS A SECRET PLAN TO BRING DOWN A DANGEROUS ARMS DEALER! CLINT HASN'T BEEN VERY HONEST ABOUT HIS FEELINGS FOR THE SEDUCTIVE BLACK WIDOW SINCE THE BEGINNING! HE CHANNELED HIS ANGER WITH HIMSELF AT BRUCE BUT STEVE PUT A STOP TO IT! NOW STEVE IS NATASHA'S DATE TO THE PARTY AND CLINT ISN'T VERY HAPPY! DOES TONY STARK SECRETLY HAVE A DEEPER PLAN THAN BRINGING DOWN A CRIMINAL? AND WHO IS THE MYSTERY GIRL HERE TO SEE THOR? WHAT IS IN STORE FOR OUR HEROS NOW!?"
"Haha. Thanks for the enthusiasm John!"
"Anytime, Rosy, see you Wednesday for bowling night!"
"Okay, take care now!"
Pickup Lines and Robots
Thor gazed upon the beautiful object of his love and affection for what seemed like an eternity and yet a fleeting moment. She was beautiful in a teal dress with her hair pinned up. Her lips were pursed, as if she couldn't decide to embrace him or hit him.
"Thor."
"Jane," He whispered then louder "Jane, my dearest Jane. Please forgive me for not contacting you once I returned to Earth. I was only thinking of your safety." He stepped closer to her and took her hand. Jane looked finally into his eyes, her own shiny with tears, and threw her slender arms around him.
"I know," She pulled away slightly to smile radiantly into his greedy eyes "I will forgive you if you dance with me."
"But I am unaccustomed to Earthly celebratory movements-" Thor protested while grinning goofily and allowing her to lead him onto the dance floor.
Tony pulled Pepper closer to him, as they danced, and bent his head to breath her in. Pepper giggled softly and they slowly turned in a circle.
"You look absolutely radiant this evening. If I had my choice of any girl here this evening, and I do, I would without a doubt select you."
"That is a line I helped you write." Smiled Pepper.
"It is isn't it?" Tony pulled back to look at her and then twirled her around and brought her close to him again. They continued their slow shuffling turn.
"Every word has a purpose. The first sentence is to build her up, flatter her. The second part is to tear her down, and remind her you are special and she is lucky you chose her. It makes her feel like she is lucky you are using her for sex that evening." Tony chuckled.
"You were so cruel to your fellow woman for writing that line."
"I was doing my job," Pepper would not look Tony in the eye. "But I suppose I secretly wished you would use it and the girl, girls, many many girls, would be infuriated by it and turn you down. But they never did and you always got them to…" Pepper trailed off.
"Hey. Hey, hey hey!" Tony startled Pepper. "I mean it this time. Actually I don't, I only mean part of it. I don't have the pick of any girl tonight. Because a few of them belong to Thor or Steve or Clint." Pepper looked away again. Tony gently tilted her head back to look at him. "And because I couldn't possibly pick any girl. Now that I have you, I can only have you. I need you. Any other girl…would just be…way to salty." Pepper laughed and Tony smiled.
"You've been saving that one haven't you?"
"Yeah I thought of it a while ago and it was just too genius to not use sparingly." Tony kissed Pepper lightly on the lips.
"Look at those goofs in love. I don't look like that do I?" Tony gestured to Steve and Thor dancing clumsily with their dates nearby. "Don't answer that. Of course not, I've got style."
"Of course you do sweetie."
"Ah well, soon enough Clint and Natasha will look just as goofy." Pepper gasped. "What?"
"We have to get Bruce a girlfriend!"
"Now, Pepper with the others it was different…" but her mind was already plotting.
Natasha was easily fending off offers to buy her drinks or to dance. She didn't know how she would recognize the target but she suspected he would be much more confident and more pushy.
"Nat. I don't know if this is a good plan. The others have gone AWOL."
"Ugg of course they have."
"Just come up here and we'll scope out the place."
"If you haven't seen anyone suspicious, I doubt I will."
"Hello, pretty lady. I can tell when you turn around you are going to be gorgeous." Natasha did not turn around.
"No thanks, bub." He chuckled.
"Spunky. I like. Are you embarrassed to turn around because you are not pretty? If you do not, you will admit you are not pretty."
"Lose him."
"Seriously," The man leaned on the bar and came into Natasha's peripheral view. He was thickly built, but not unattractive and had a gun in his inside breast pocket. "I don't take no for an answer." He said grinning.
Natasha turned to him smiling. "Well aren't you armed and dangerous. Of course I would love to dance with a man as powerful…and as handsome as you."
As they went out onto the dance floor Natasha remarked. "Oh, it looks like the band is going to wrap up playing. I hope nobody interferes with the party going on, now that I found you big boy." She attempted to drop hints for Clint. She hoped he would be down soon to help.
He may have been gorgeous but up close his breath was terrible. His hands moved over her body forcefully. She forced a smile. She could easily take him out a thousand ways that moment but she didn't want to cause a scene. It would be way easier if Clint would take a hint and come down and act like security.
"If you're through enjoying yourself, just let me know if he is the target or not."
Natasha hugged her dance partner close and nodded over his shoulder. Clint saw from the balcony.
Clint desperately wanted to be next to Natasha. He felt uncomfortable and overwhelmed, alone on the balcony. He had never felt like that. That was where he felt most comfortable usually. But for once he hated his perch. He felt the urge to be with Nat and protect her from those leeches.
He knew she could handle herself. She was tougher than him at hand-to-hand combat, as demonstrated by their fight when he was under Loki's control. But the fact didn't change his illogical need to protect her.
The lecherous man feeling up Natasha on the dance floor enraged Clint. When Natasha confirmed it was the target, Clint did not waste any time. He poised his bow to fire but Natasha and him were too close. Clint, swore and leapt from the balcony. From much closer now he aimed his bow again. Natasha only had time to turn to him in annoyance and shock before he loosed an arrow. The arrow tore through the man's upper thigh and he fell to the ground in pain. Everyone gaped. Clint rose, fuming.
"Clint!" Natasha yelled as she stalked towards him in her stilettos.
"What!" he snapped.
"What? What!? What is that you just made a huge scene that could have been easily avoided!"
"Sorry! I thought you didn't enjoy guys feeling you up! Maybe I was wrong!"
"What?! Clint that's-" she was inches away from him now jabbing her finger into his chest for emphasis. "Wait…are you jealous?" Clint took a step back.
"You are!"
"Listen, Nat, I'm not good at this."
"Well, you jeopardized the mission and the safety of everyone by-" Clint pulled Natasha into a passionate kiss, cupping her face in his strong hands.
The crowd applauded.
"Wait…" said Clint, pulling away
"Tony!" cried Natasha
"Yep, everyone here is an actor. You're welcome."
"I swear to god I am going to kill him-" grumbled Clint. Tony emerged from the crowd and yanked the head off of the supposed target, revealing it was a robot.
"And don't worry, you didn't hurt an actor."
"Very unprofessional Mr. Stark." Scolded Natasha.
"You're one to talk, miss Romanov! You had to have known once you got so close to it and yet. You went. Along with it." Tony grinned.
"Oh, was that smell motor oil…" Natasha trailed off coyly.
Clint looked down at Natasha inquisitively but she avoided his gaze. Tony clapped his hands twice and the actors returned to mingling and behaving as if they were actual guests. He disappeared into the crowd. Before Clint could follow Natasha turned him around and kissed him.
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