Try to Forget

In Misguided Angel, a vampire killer emerges through a viral video, threatening to kill vampires live online. Mimi, acting as Regent, tries to figure out who it is with Oliver's help. They inquire the Conduits, because they're the closest humans to the vampires (besides familiars).

Eloise, being a Conduit, is called in for questioning. Since she's still trying to get over Oliver being Schuyler's familiar and the way he's been acting, she answers his questions rather rudely. He can't take a hint and lashes out just as fiercely as she does.

Mimi rose suddenly. "I see you two have some unresolved tension to take care of." Eloise could have sworn she saw her mouth twitch, but she was gone from the room too quickly to be sure.

Eloise didn't want to be here. Just sitting in his presence made the pain worse. Maybe he'd let her go, no questions asked.

"Ellie…" He sighed, looking very tired.

"I'm sorry, alright?" She refused to look directly at him; he didn't deserve that much from her. "I'm fine. Not that you're concerned at all."

She didn't need to see his face to know he was frowning. "Are you trying to pick a fight with me? I'm really not in the mood to -"

"You're never in the mood for anything!"

"Ellie, calm down -"

"No." She forced herself to glare right into those hazel eyes, the ones that once held so much comfort and, dare she say it, love. "I am sick of all this, Oliver! I understand you're still hung up about Schuyler -"

His face fell, and she wanted to rush into his arms and tell him it was alright, but she knew it was no use.

"- but it's time you tried to move on. I'm not saying it'll be easy -"

"What if I don't want to?!" He walked right up to her, easily making her shrink back. His height was almost enough to make her back off. Almost.

"Oliver, she's gone."

"Not to me." He gingerly touched his neck, and she could imagine the two raised bumps there. "She didn't bite you, take your blood, mark you as hers. No matter how hard I try, I won't belong to anyone else." He sighed. "And maybe I don't want to."

Familiars had a hard time letting go. There would be a small part of them that would function normally, but most of them pined for their vampire, and that overrode that small part. No matter how much that small part wanted something, it would go unheeded.

It didn't matter. Those words lit a fire within her, making her hold her ground, wanting him to know how much this hurt. How much he made her hurt.

"That's your problem. You haven't tried. You don't want to try. You're not willing to forget! I want to help you, but you don't care! You're too busy holding on, causing yourself more pain! You just don't care, Oliver! You don't care that I've been in love with you for God knows how long, and I'm willing to help you get through this and -"

His hands firmly on her shoulders interrupted her. She felt her anger ebb away, slowly being drained by his eyes.

"Ellie?" His voice was quiet. "Did…did you say you…were in love with me?"

Had she said that? Had she really been that stupid and told him? What did it matter if she had?

She nodded, glaring up at him. "I still am," she whispered, standing on her toes and kissing him softly.

It felt like nothing more than a breath on her lips, but it was enough to set off fireworks in her mind. She wanted him to kiss her back, wanted to have him feel the same way. She pulled away, knowing it wasn't going to happen. However, it was almost impossible to miss the bright pink blush in his cheeks; it was the same color gracing her own.

"I'm going to leave you alone, Oliver, at least where my feelings are concerned. I won't add that to what you're dealing with, but I want you to know I'll help you, if you want. You're still my friend, and I hate seeing you like this."

He pulled her into his arms and held her tightly against him. She realized this wasn't him saying he loved her in return; it was his way of saying he needed her here, to let him know someone understood how much it stung to love someone who would never love you back.

She felt his tears land in her hair. "I want to kiss you, Ellie," he said softly. "Part of me wants to so badly."

She didn't answer him, just pressed her head into his chest, and let her own tears fall to the floor.