"Some days I can't even dress myself.
It's killing me to see you this way."
Gwen was sitting outside of Morgana's room when Merlin came running up. Gwen got off of the nearby chair and met him in front of the door. She'd requested Merlin's presence, Morgana that is. Gwen for some reason was frustrating the Lady Morgana and stated that Merlin would be more help than her normal maid.
"I told Arthur you'd be serving him lunch. I didn't say why just that I had chores elsewhere. He wasn't happy but I ran away before he could yell at me for it." Merlin always risked himself to help others around him. Gwen always told Morgana that Merlin was adored by many in the lower city. Morgana never seemed surprised.
"She's waiting inside on her bed. I don't know what bothers her. She won't say a word to me about anything." Merlin patted Gwen's shoulder and wished her luck with Arthur, who was also very cranky that day. Merlin entered into Morgana's room unannounced and searched for her. It wasn't long before he found her exactly where Gwen had said she'd be – on the bed.
Merlin sat next to her, noting that she was wearing her nightgown still. It would be widely mistaken if someone were to walk in at that exact moment. She was staring off into the ceiling for whatever reason. He'd heard around the castle that he nightmares grew more restless and she appeared ever more distracted.
"M'lady? Gwen said you requested me specifically?" He asked kindly. She nodded with distinct fear across her face. Merlin looked around to the door he'd closed behind himself. He put an arm around Morgana and leaned into her ear. "It's killing me to see this way, Morgana."
This elicited a response from her. She turned into him and nestled her hand into his scrawny chest. She sobbed uncontrollably and never spoke one word to him as to why. She held him close and let go of whatever it was that stressed her so deeply. Merlin did not probe for information but rather sat there patiently as she continued on with her sorrow. He did not judge for it and neither did he hate being with her. He'd grown very fond of the lady, sometimes finding himself daydreaming of her when he was working for Arthur.
She eventually laid back on her bed and crawled under the covers. She looked to be completely mental but Merlin sat nearby. Her lips quivered and her body shook as she struggled to find a comfortable position. Morgana had never appeared to fragile.
"Things happen at night. Candles relight themselves, doors open and close on their own, and objects I need that are on the other side of the room float onto my nightstand. I can't explain them, Merlin. I'm frightened. I'm so scared of myself that I can't even change my under garments. I'm going mad!" She was trying not to shout but she did raise her voice. Morgana finally sat upright and pulled her knees to her chest. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to do for her but he did have an answer. For a long time Gaius had been telling Merlin to keep his nose out of Morgana's nightmares, which they both had concluded were premonitions of actual events. She was a seer but Merlin had been forbidden to tell her by Gaius. If Uther ever knew then Morgana would be burned for a crime she knew not she committed. Unfortunately, not being told was causing her to go insane. Her emotional state was unstable and uncontrollable. Merlin hated standing idly by as she found herself falling apart from not knowing, from not having an explanation for it all.
"Do you want to know a secret?" Merlin scooted up next to her and wrapped his arm around her again. She leaned on his shoulder and nodded softly in response. Merlin knew the risk he was taking in telling Morgana the truth. He knew that Gaius would scold him. He knew that Uther might kill her. He also knew that he was a warlock and that even though he'd been warned not to let her know her true powers that letting her go insane wasn't the right thing to do. "It sounds like magic, doesn't it?" He squeezed her ever closer.
"Uther would kill me if it were true. He's got no heart and no sympathy for anyone with magic. He'd have me killed for everyone to see." It was the most smooth her voice had sounded yet. It was as though she was not in a mad panic at all. Merlin took his free and turned her chin towards him.
"I promise that I would never let that happen." Merlin felt her cool skin on his fingertips but it did nothing for the burning sensation he had in his body. Their friendship had been growing and growing since the first night that he had to take her back to her room. It was a fresh memory. All the while he was stuck in his own mind Morgana was sinking into him, so much that her lips found his and her hands ran through his hair.
Merlin had never been kissed before and found himself melting at the experience. Everything around them seemed to freeze. Morgana grew more engrossed in kissing him and Merlin grew more active, put his own hands behind her hand and on her waist. It seemed to go on forever. It was Arthur's incessant knocking that eventually pulled the pair back to reality.