A/N: The song to listen to whilst reading this chapter is The Script "I'm your's" I had it on a loop when writing and there are just certain lyrics in it that scream "Edward" to me.

"I may not have the softest touch, but I'm your's" ..... need I say anymore to convince you?

Thank you to everyone who voted for Enigma in the Indie TwiFic Awards. I have no idea if I'm through to the next round yet but did receive lots of pm's full of support. I want you all to know how much I appreciate that you took the time to read, review and then go and vote for my fic. It warms my heart!

I'd like to mention my Beta Acrosstheskyinstars who, as usual, did an amazing job with my illegal use of the comma and my usual run on sentences. Please go and check out her fic "Forgive me, please" it really is awesome and beautifully written.

I'm sending all my love to you, Tanya and my other Bff's Malmo722, inside the disarray and into scrapes.

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Ch 5 Betrayed

I opened my eyes to find Edward was no longer holding me but across the cell, his knees raised and head bowed.

The air was cold but I didn't move. I wanted to watch him a little longer so I remained still, half covered by the thin blanket the guards had provided.

His breathing was uneven, and as I studied him I noticed his hands were shaking.

"Did you sleep well?" His voice startled me, I had tried to remain still and yet he knew I was awake.

"Better than I expected," I admitted. "How did you know I was awake?"

Edward raised his head slightly and peered at me through the fringe of hair falling over his forehead.

"Your heartbeat, it picked up rhythm and your breathing changed too."

"Oh," was all I could think to say.

Edward raised a shaky hand and dragged it through his hair. His head followed the motion of his hand and came to rest against the bars of the cell.

I pulled myself up to match his pose and grimaced as I felt tender in certain areas. I slowly eased my back against the bars with my knees raised in front of me. My hair fell around my face, and lifting my hands I realised it had come loose from the pins and was just a tattered mess atop my head. I searched through the knots and pulled free any pins I could still find, letting my hair fall around my shoulders. I ran my fingers through the mess, trying to tame it without much success.

"Did you sleep?" I asked him as I gathered up the mass of knotted curls and tried to tidy it without the use of a mirror.

Edward laughed lightly. "No."

"Oh Edward, I'm so sorry." I felt guilty, blaming my scent for his restless night.

"It's not that," he interrupted me. "I didn't sleep because I don't."

"Not ever?"

He shook his head, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips as he tilted his face to look over at me. He took my breath away. Every-time he smiled it was like a vice gripping my chest. He had no idea how amazing he looked and I felt an almost irresistible urge to crawl across the cell towards him and kiss him like he'd kissed me the night before.

His smile faltered and turning his face away from me he closed his eyes and gripped his hands together.

"Edward, what's wrong?"

He exhaled loudly, the noise almost like a laugh; his smile hesitated and his brows started to furrow. He looked agonised.

"I don't know how much longer I can resist," he confessed, his voice barely audible from across the room.

"I'm so sorry."

We sat in silence for a moment, I was too scared to move as I watched him struggle with his inner demons; his baser instincts.

"Is it very difficult?" I asked him quietly.

"More so than before," he confessed.

"What's changed?" I wondered if it was because I was clean, no longer masking my scent with the musky odour of sweat and unlaundered clothing.

"Bella, I haven't – eaten – in weeks. Imagine if they starved you and then placed a three course meal in front of you –"

"They starved you? What about the – rats?" I hated to ask him about his food. It was demeaning what they offered him and it broke my heart to see him reduced to this.

Edward nodded. "Not even rats."

"Since I was taken away, 3 days ago?"

He nodded again. "It's been longer than that for me, since before you came."

I felt confusion and then anger build inside me. I had lain in clean sheets and a magnificent bed, eaten plenty and sated my thirst with ice cold water and all the while Edward had been locked in this pit of a cell with nought but the memory of what it felt like to satisfy his hunger.

"Why would they do that? I thought they needed your help? How can you help them if you're weak from hunger?"

Edward's hands gripping his hair stopped my onslaught of questions.

Of course!

My scent appealed to him. Both James and Edward had admitted that, more so than any other human who had been brought here and tortured in a bid to tempt him. I was separated from him and in that time Edward had not been offered any sustenance. James had hoped he would react to my presence like a starved animal.

"He wants you to feed off me?" I sounded incredulous. That man would stop at nothing.

Edward laughed again but his voice sounded unsteady, and in the blink of an eye he flew across the room at me, his hands either side of my head as his body pressed me flat against the wall.

"It burns," he hissed as he lowered his face to within an inch of mine.

I stared at him, wide eyed but not terrified. This was Edward's animalistic side, the instinct to feed was driving him beyond my recognition, but as I watched him, shaking and struggling to contain his urge, I felt nothing but desire for him. With my own hands shaking I lifted them up to untie the binds of my bodice.

Edward's black eyes dropped to watch the motion of my fingers as they pulled apart the confines of my dress. His lips parted and I felt his breath – cool and fragrant – billow against my skin.

My nipples puckered and I pushed the bodice away from my shoulders. It came to rest on the curve, not quite falling away as I had wanted it too.

He dragged his eyes back up to mine. A low growl emitted from the back of his throat.

"Take from me what you will," I whispered unblinking and sure.

"You have no idea what you offer me," he groaned as he leant in a little closer. I could feel the wall at my back, but instead of cowering into it I pressed myself closer to him. His chest was solid and unmoving. His body was perfectly aligned with mine.

"I know that you want this." I turned my head slightly and exposed my pulse to his burning gaze. It throbbed in the base of my neck, quickening with the anticipation of his touch; I craved it.

"Yes, I want you," he said softly. Bowing his head he kissed my pulse point, letting it beat erratically against his lips. I felt goose bumps envelope me from head to foot, I had no idea if he would bite. I knew I didn't care if he did.

His lips were soft and he pressed them tenderly atop the beating muscle beneath my skin, his body leaned in closer but his hands remained beside my head. The only part of him that moved was his mouth.

I felt his lips part slightly and his tongue flick out to taste me. My legs turned weak and I involuntarily reached up and clung to his arms. I could feel him shaking.

"Edward –" I wanted to ask him to drink from me, to take what he needed to quench his thirst, but I was unable to speak because I also wanted him to take me as a man takes a woman. I didn't know which I desired most.

"When you came back last night, I knew everything that he did to you. I knew how you smelt to him, how you tasted...."

As Edward talked I turned my head back round to face him, he lifted his own from my neck and hovered in front of me, his nose lightly brushing the tip of mine. I was mesmerised by his stare and even as a small tremor of excitement and fear crept inside of me, I couldn't move. His eyes were intense and wide, his mouth parted as he seemed to devour me with just his gaze.

My pulse skipped a beat as he raised his hand and brushed his knuckles across my cheek. His eyes narrowed as he caught the unsteady rhythm of my heart.

"Are you afraid of me, Bella?" He asked, his frown marring his perfect features. I longed to reach up and brush away the lines and make him smile at me again. "Please don't fear me."

I shook my head. I wasn't afraid of Edward. I was afraid of how I felt for him. He was all consuming.

"H –how did you – know?" I stuttered, captivated by his words.

Edward tapped the side of his head with his index finger. "I can see you."

I gasped. I didn't have a clue what he meant or how it was possible he could see my actions from the previous night. I didn't want him to see it.

I felt heat infuse my face as my own mind was invaded with images of my body atop Rosalie's and my lips on her most intimate parts, the feel of James behind me, filling me. I didn't want Edward to see this too.

"I knew how your skin felt under his touch." Edward lifted both his hands and held them out in front of him, his palms raised up as he looked at them in wonder; as if they memory of my skin was ingrained in their sense.

"How?" I asked him again. "Were you spying on me?"

"I can free myself from the chains, Bella, but not from the cells. I wasn't spying on you."

"Then how?"

"I can see James's thoughts. He came in here to speak to me before you were brought back down. James knows I can see his mind and he took great pleasure in recalling every memory of last night so I could share it too."

I broke his stare and buried my face in my hands.

"Don't think of me like that, oh please don't see me like that," I begged him, ashamed of my brazen urges. I didn't want him to see me so uninhibited under the spell of another man's touch.

Leaning closer towards me Edward rested one palm beside my head again and lifted my chin with his other hand.

"Bella," he murmured, "look at me."

I peeked through my fingers but kept my hands over my cheeks. They burned with the heat of my blush.

His eyes were hooded like he had drunk too much wine. "James was quite vivid with his memory recall, Bella. And now, it's all I can see. All I can think about. The sight of you, naked and willing – oh Bella, it drives me insane, even more than the scent of your blood."

I said nothing, just stared at him.

"Out of everything he showed me, Bella, do you know what sticks out the clearest in my mind?"

I shook my head. Edward trailed his finger down my chin, over my neck and across my collarbone. His eyes followed his finger and my eyes watched his. My breathing was deeper, and as I exhaled and my breath swept over his face, he closed his eyes and shuddered.

It took all my strength not to rip at his clothes and beg him to wipe clear the memory of James and replace it with himself.

"It's not the image of your naked body, or the things you did to that woman. No," he shook his head, "nor is it the intense desire he felt for you when he pushed his way inside. All of that consumes me Bella, but the clearest image, the one I cling to, is the moment you said my name."

"Edward, I –"

"Yes," he murmured, bending his head and licking my neck, "just like that."

I closed my eyes and my head fell back against the wall.

"I want to do all of that to you. I want to feel myself deep inside you and I want to look into your eyes when you call my name."

I nodded as if he was requesting this of me. I would agree to anything with this man.

Edward moved his head away from my neck and took a step backwards.

I blinked as cold air hit me where his breath had just caressed.

"I want you too," I said softly, desperate to feel him touch me again.

He stepped further away from me until his back was against the cell wall; his hands groped around until he found the chains and slipped his hands inside.

"Edward." I stepped towards him. "I meant it when I offered myself to you. I want to help you –"

"Help me?" He shook his head and turned his back from me. His shoulders hunched. It seemed as though he wanted to be as far away from me as possible. It broke my heart. I wanted him close to me as he had been just moments before.

"Help me," he muttered again. "Bella if I taste you it won't help me. It will condemn me."

"How? It's what you do, it's who you are."

Edward wrenched his hands free of the chains and I watched, suddenly terrified as he appeared to glide across the floor towards me. I instantly regretted my words.

"Its. Who. I. Am?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean –"

"It's who I am."

"Edward."

"Argh, why is it when you say my name I want to fuck you? You offer me your blood and I just want to fuck you. I am tying myself in knots when I'm around you and all I want to do is Fuck. You."

I watched him as he slid down the wall and sat on the floor, his hands gripping his hair.

"You have no idea who I am. What I go through."

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it, I don't know what – I – Edward, please," I stuttered, desperate to find the words to explain what I had meant.

"You are more than just a meal to me, Bella, so much more." His shoulders shook but no tears escaped. I felt so wretched.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I know how difficult it is for you, I've seen you struggle. You've even told me and yet I act so selfishly. I just want to help you. What can I do? Tell me what I can do." He stood and walked over to me and lifting my face he bent and kissed away my tears.

"What can I do?" I sobbed.

Edward shook his head. "There isn't anything you can do, Bella. It's not something you can help. Your blood is a part of you, I don't know why it's so much more potent to me than any other but I meant what I said." He swallowed. "You're so much more to me."

"Tell me your story," I suddenly asked, wanting to distract him.

"My story?"

I nodded. "Yes, your story. You're right, I know nothing about you. Who you are, who you were. Tell me. I want to know you."

"My story," Edward mumbled. I sat and waited for him to begin but he remained still. Breathing hard, his hands gripped in front of him. I wanted to push him but chose to be patient.

Eventually he started to talk, his voice quiet but still melodic to my ears.

"My mother's name was Elizabeth," he began, "As was my sister's. She was 4 years my junior and such a cute little thing. I adored her. My father had died when I was just 10 years old and it fell upon my shoulders to provide for my family." I sat down on the floor and watched him pace.

"Mother took in laundry and sewing and I mostly worked the land with the local farmers. I took some of the knowledge I earned away with me and built my own vegetable garden at our little cottage. It took some time but we soon had an abundance of potatoes and beans. When I was 13 a rich gentleman on horseback passed by our home and stopped to ask my mother for some water."

Edward stopped pacing and sat down across the cells opposite me.

"He was not like any other gentleman I had ever seen. He was polite even to us; as we were below his social standing in the community this was quite unusual. My mother, albeit poor, was also a proud woman and she asked both Elizabeth and I to entertain our guest with a song. I think he was touched by our close family unit because he said he wanted to help and offered me lessons in piano and a room at his estate in return for an apprenticeship in carpentry. He explained that my wages would be sent on to my family. I wanted to do all I could for my mother and sister; they were all I had and I loved them dearly, so I agreed."

He paused to stretch his legs out in front of him, rubbing his palms down his thighs before settling back against the bars.

"The gentleman's name was Marcus and he shared his home with his crippled wife, Didyme. She had fallen from a horse and was no longer able to walk. I think he asked for me to come with him because he was lonely as her accident had made Didyme a bitter woman and she would be cruel and say such dreadful things to Marcus. He confessed to me he was searching for a cure. I wasn't an educated boy, Bella, but even I knew there was nothing that could cure her and I didn't believe she deserved his help. Never had I ever met such a twisted and evil woman and while Marcus wanted to save her, I just prayed she would hurry up and die.

"I'm not a bad person. Not really, but Marcus was my saviour. He had been kind to a poor woman and her family, had offered a home and a job to her son and paid for that work which fed my family. To me, he was everything I was missing in a father.

"I'd been living at Marcus's estate for 4 years when he came to me and asked for my help. He'd found someone who could aid Didyme. I was reluctant to go with him because I didn't want to do anything for her at all but it was for Marcus that I finally agreed and followed.

"We left at midnight and met another man in a clearing in the forest. It was raining but the moon was so full everything glowed, even his skin. I remember that night well because it was my last."

Edward stopped talking. I was disappointed as I was enjoying his story. I had been able to listen to his voice, which was always beautiful to me and I had been granted a small insight into his past.

"What happened?" I asked him, keen for him to continue.

"We led the man back to Marcus's home. I took care of his horse and then joined them in the library. I remember looking at him and feeling such awe. There was something about this man that commanded respect and also fear. He was almost non human.

"Marcus approached me and apologised. He asked me to forgive his sins. He didn't need to say anything more. I knew there and then that he had sold my soul to this devil."

Edward lifted his hands from his lap and studied them for a moment, turning them over so he could look at his palms. I noticed his shaking had subsided slightly and felt relief that he was finding some control.

"They wheeled Didyme into the room still in her bed, and as she lay in wait for her miracle, I waited for my end. The man told Didyme to be patient. He then explained that he needed to feed after he had helped her because in helping her he would be denying himself satisfaction. I realised I was to be his satisfaction."

I shuddered at his words, imagining young, human Edward wanting to help his Mentor, so naive and unknowing that he was only ever a means to an end for Marcus.

"To my horror," Edward continued, "he bent to her neck and bit her. She screamed but he held fast and I watched as he drank from her veins. The blood pumping through his lips and just as I thought he would drain her of every last drop he dragged his head away and snarled. I could see his teeth as his lips curled back and I tried to flee but Marcus and two other men held me down."

He turned his head and looked at me, "I was 17 years old and no match for them."

"Oh Edward," I whispered but he carried on uninterrupted.

"I remember hearing Didyme scream, her agony ripping through her broken body as she cursed Marcus and his 'friend'.

"To hear her suffer as he swooped down on me, brought me one last moment of pleasure before I felt his teeth pierce through my skin. I wanted her to suffer. But it was not as painful as I thought it would be. His lips became soft and other than a gentle tug as he sucked my life out of me, there was nothing unpleasant in that act. His hand held my head to the side and I could see Didyme writhing in pain on the bed. I wondered at her torture when all I was feeling was peace.

"But then Marcus surprised us all. He released his hold on my arm and taking a knife he walked slowly over to Didyme and decapitated her.

"I remember the man screamed as he tore his mouth from my neck, and if it wasn't for the two others holding me, I would've fallen to the floor, weak and drained; barely alive.

"I don't recall everything that happened next, just that the man left and I succumbed to the same agony that had ridden Didyme's body. I awoke some time later and discovered this was my fate."

The silence in the cell felt thick. I sat in wonder of Edward's tale, picturing this young man respecting and helping someone who he had held in high regard, only to be betrayed by that same man. Marcus had brought to Didyme a Vampire; wanting to save his wife.

"Why did he kill her?" I whispered.

"Marcus had loved his wife, Bella. She had been kind and full of life prior to her accident. He had searched the corners of the earth to find anyone, someone who could help her. He had believed in their love but as she lay in her bed, burning and changing, she still found it in her to be cruel and mocking to him. I think he realised in that moment that she would never be the Didyme he had loved and married. He had lost her the day she had fallen from her horse."

"Edward, he betrayed you yet you still hold wonder for him in your voice. Why?"

Edward rested his head in his hands. "He killed her to free himself and to free me. He took care of me, Bella. It was because of him that I am what I am."

"You're a Vampire because of him."

"Yes."

"You watched your family die while you live protected in immortality."

"Yes."

"And they never knew what had become of you?"

"No." He shook his head. "Marcus still sent them money and I watched them from a distance, but they never heard from me nor saw me ever again."

"What happened to the Vampire who changed you?"

"I don't know," Edward said softly. "He fled the library and Marcus's home. I never saw him again. I spent a long time looking for him, I knew no one else of my kind."

"Edward, I'm sorry you went through any of that. I'm so sorry I made you tell me." I wiped a tear from my cheek and hugged my knees closer. "And I'm sorry I pushed you. I want to help you and yet I feel so useless. Why do you stay here? I don't understand. You keep yourself chained yet can release them at any time. You stay here but admit that I tempt you. What is it that keeps you here?"

Edward stood and walked over to the chains, he rested his forehead against the wall and I watched his knuckles turn even whiter as his grip imbedded the contours of his hand in the iron wrist bands.

"I've told you before of another gift I have."

I nodded even though he couldn't see me.

"I found other's in my search for my maker. They told me I had a gift that should not be wasted. I thought that it was the same for all of them, but I was wrong. It was only me that had it. Others had gifts too, but with me, I was unique."

"You read minds."

Edward nodded.

"James wants that?"

"James wants much more than that Bella."

"Tell me."

Edward shook his head. "You don't want to know."

"Yes I do."

Edward remained silent.

"James mentioned something to me."

His head snapped up, "What did he say?"

"Nothing, just like you he merely hinted but wouldn't give details."

"It's better if you don't know."

"He asked me to help him," I confessed.

Edward became still, his body tense and unmoving.

"Edward?"

"What did he ask you to do?"

I reached into my skirts and pulled out the knife James had given me, holding out my hand I showed him.

He sat up on his knees and crept towards me. He stopped within an arm's length and took the knife from my out stretched hand.

"He asked me to help break you."

Edward caressed the knife's handle, and turning it over in his hand he read from an inscription I hadn't noticed.

"Hodie est a bonus dies morior." He then turned the blade and read from the other side. "God's mos."

He continued to stroke the blade. "What is that?" I asked him.

"Latin," he replied.

"Do you know what it means?"

Edward lifted his eyes to mine. "The first one says 'Today is a good day to die' and the other translates to 'God's will'."

We both studied the intricate design swirling along the handle, the pearls encrusted in its design. It really was remarkable.

"I don't know why he gave it to me, Edward. I'm sure a knife cannot harm you."

He shook his head. "No it can't."

"Then why would he give it to me?"

"Maybe in the end the blade would be your wish Bella and not mine."

I shook my head too, keeping my eyes on Edward. "No matter the outcome, Edward, I would never choose the blade."

Edward's hand began to shake again, and turning away he walked back over to the chains.

"Let me help you."

"Leave me alone," he muttered, "that's how you can help me."

I felt tears spring to my eyes. Over and over again I had cried in this cell. I watched Edward's back and longed to reach out to him.

"I would never betray you."

He didn't answer me. I wondered if it was stupid of me to have been so honest with him.

"I won't help him, Edward. I care nothing for James or his plans." I walked slowly across the cell and placed my hand on his back. "I care for you."

For a moment he let it rest there before he shrugged it off. I let it fall limply to my side.

"After all is said and done, Isabella, when the time comes for me, if I was able, I would always choose the blade."

I turned from him and moved to far side of the cells. If I could've crawled between the bars to give him the space he craved, I would have. As if on cue I heard footsteps in the corridor before Crowley entered. He walked over and unlocking Edward's cell door, he beckoned to me.

"Out."

I walked over to him and glanced at Edward but he kept his back to me. I waited as Crowley locked the door again and then opened the one next to it, the one that had been my cell in the beginning.

"In you go, Witch." I stepped over the threshold and Crowley slammed the door. "Captain has instructed you be in his rooms by six tomorrow evening. Someone will come for you."

He turned and walked away, taking the torch from the doorway he left the cells in darkness.

The pale moon shone through the small window overhead, but it barely lit an inch of the blackness it hit. I sat down with my back to the bars, and raising my knees up I hugged them to my chest.

A clatter of metal across concrete made me turn, and looking from Edward to the floor on his side of the cell I noticed the knife.

I left it where it lay.

Turning my head away from his shadowy form I whispered into the dark, "I'm so sorry."

Xxxxxxx

I awoke some time later to find the cells still dark. I had slipped to the floor in my slumber with my back still pressed against the bars, but they were not all I could feel. Edward's hand was at my waist and his groin pressed into my bottom. He lay behind me, snuggled against me, spooning me through the bars. I shifted closer and his hand tightened at my waist.

His other arm lay beneath my head. He had offered it to me like a pillow as I'd slept. Bending at the elbow, he'd wrapped it around me and rested his palm against my shoulder.

"Forgive me?" I asked him, my voice still a whisper. I needed him to know I had never set out to hurt him.

"Usquequaque forever, haud question," he replied. I had no idea what it meant but his voice was tender and so for now my heart was satisfied.

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A/N's: The last sentence Edward spoke in Latin translates to "Always, forever, no question"