Miss insensitive writer is back.

purplepam, ItsShuhei, tituslepetitlion, Lizzy,soulreaper-san, star133, ra7matigorti2. Thank you for the reviews, glad you liked the poem.

1. This is the chapter i love the most.

2. Major M rating in the paragraph that begins with "Rukia had cold hands" (just to let know the under 18 readers). Only that paragraph... the rest is ok.

3. Enjoy! :)

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There is a first time for everything. After Ichigo brought me back to the floor and hold my hand while leading me out of the club, I was thinking of all the first times of my life…

First time when I felt like home, it was when Renji took me in his arms after I woke up from a nightmare. I was 10 years old back then. I knew him for a few days only, but I trusted him since he was the only person to ever show me some kindness. That night he allowed me to sleep in his arms and he told me: "We don't need money to build a home." I was surprised at first, because he seemed such a hot tempered character and I would have never guessed that he had such a warm heart. Somehow, in that moment I wish for my life to be like that forever .

And that was a first.

The first time when I felt beautiful was when Sode no Shirayuki gave me her name. "The beauty lies inside" she told me when I almost started to cry on the thought that a skinny and weak person such as I was didn't deserve such a mesmerizing zanpakuto. "Then you are my beauty" I replied to her. "As much as you are mine…" she added. That was also the first time when I felt cold. Ever since, the coldness became my second nature. Now that I think about it, I used to be a lot nicer when I was just Rukongai child…I guess life changes our ways, here and there.

First time when I was scared, was when I met Kuchiki Byakuya. I was scared because I knew that my life was about to change… and somehow I feared the nobles will change me in a way that I won't be able to recognize myself in front of the mirror. Fortunately I still know whose reflection is every time I look into it…

Partially, this is because Kuchiki Byakuya wasn't as scary as he seemed to be initially. As a matter of fact, being frightful was not Byakuya's main issue… It was his beauty. If he would have been an average looking person, people would have ignore his insensitivity… but he was so beautiful that no one could forgive the way he was wasting his beauty on that cold attitude. Nobody… not even myself.

When I met Byakuya I also felt frustration for the first time. I remember that one night, I saw Byakuya sitting under a cherry tree, still as a statue, against the blue moon light. So beautiful and cold… just like my zanpakuto. That was one of the reasons I wanted to be close to him…Somehow, he was familiar to me. I felt that we could to share so many things…but Byakuya was always so distant.

"Nii-sama never looks at me!... Nii-sama never looks at me… Nii-sama never…"

For decades frustration was my second name, every time I stepped in the Kuchiki manor. And then one day, he looked at me. One day he started to protect me and every time he made a shield out of his body, I felt like I wanted to put myself in danger more so he could rescue me again and again. When Byakuya held me in his arms, it was the first time I felt safe. It was a different kind of safety, nothing like Renji's or Ichigo's, because Byakuya was a man… and Byakuya pulled out somehow the woman in me. It was the feminine instinct that was earning for me to become weak and dependable… So different from the way I felt around Ichigo. My orange haired lunatic, always made want to become stronger.

"Nii-sama will you look at me once more?"

But always, the moment I was no longer in danger, he disappeared. His eyes returned to their specific coldness… and again that distance came between us.

That was another "first" for me. It was the first time I understood that in life, things are not always turning out the way we wanted... and that sometimes, what we want is not what we need:

"I'm sorry Nii-sama, but I've waited too long for you. Now, It's too late. Today it's too late for us..."

The first time I knew hope in my heart was when I met Kaien-dono and the first time when I felt like the world was about to end was when he died in my arms. Yet, the world did not come to an end… it just turned upside down the moment I met Ichigo.

Meeting Ichigo was a string of "first time" for me:

First time I broke the rules.

First time I found a reason to become stronger.

First time I abandoned reason…

First time I fell in love…

While Ichigo was leading me to that hotel room, all these thoughts were wandering in my mind and I knew that tonight will be another…"first time" .

"Did you know, Ichigo? There is a first time in everything…and I glad that you are the first…" that's what i told him after i put a kido spell on the door.

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Rukia had cold hands… and they felt like bless on his naked burning body. He looked at her beautiful porcelain skin. She felt his eyes on her and she bit her lips with a troubled and embarrassed expression. She was just so… naked. All her clothes… all her thoughts… all her secrets were gone.

"Don't do this Rukia…" he softly whispered. "Don't be embarrassed… you're beautiful…"

Her face turned red, along with all her body. Even her hands turned hot.

"You're so beautiful and I want to look at you…" he said again. "Will that bother you?…"

She couldn't reply. Even if she wanted him to think she is beautiful, she couldn't tell him 'look at me!'. She wished for him to do so, though…

"If you want I'll close my eyes…" he added and closed his eyes. "Even though it's a shame…if this will make feel at ease, I'll close them…"

But then he felt her hands over his cheeks.

"Open your eyes, Ichigo…" she said with a low voice. "Look at me!"

And before he could open them, she felt her lips kissing him. With his eyes wide opened looking for her amethyst gaze, he had no choice but to look at her body with his hands. He started to wander on her naked back…her waist… her hips… He couldn't bear it anymore. He needed look at them, to taste them. He parted from her lips and careful so he won't miss an inch of her skin, he descends her neck… to her decolletage. When he reached her breast he pressed his cheeks on them as he strongly held her in his arms. Then, he slowly pushed her on the surface of her the bed while his lips were descending to her stomach…When he reached her belly and he looked at it, his stomach suddenly ached. He put a trembling hand on its surface and his skin got goose bumps on the thought that her womb could carry one day… his child… their child.

"Rukia… I can't believe you are finally mine…"

"I always was…" she replied.

He lift his head from her abdomen and looked at her surprised… but more than surprised was when he felt all her body relaxed. She was ready… He slowly got up and put himself on top of her. She didn't withstand and slowly parted her legs. He put his hands on her shoulders, sustaining his body on his elbows… but then, when he slowly pushed, she suddenly closed her eyes with a hurt expression.

His eyes widened worried.

"Rukia… Are you alright?" he whispered.

She bit her lips, pretending that she didn't heard him.

"Go on…" she said trying to sound naturally.

"Rukia…" he insisted worried.

But then his eyes widened as he finally understood the reason she was acting like this.

"Rukia don't tell me…" he whispered almost shocked.

She closed her eyes and turned her face away from him.

"Rukia…" he whispered, holding her shoulders strongly. "Look at me… you never…?"

She frowned, but still she didn't face him.

"I told you, haven't i?" she snapped, trying to play annoyed so she will hide her embarrassment. "I was always yours…So I waited for you only!"

He smiled warmly as his amber eyes pierced her. He was staring at her and that made her feel uncomfortable, but he didn't care: he wanted to take the delight of this moment, before he will always remember it.

"Now, go on! Laugh on my lack of experience!" she snapped and his eyes suddenly widened worried:

"Why would I laugh?" he whispered warmly as he leaned over her. He hold her tight and approached her ear: "Thank you for waiting for me… thank you for letting me be the first."

He couldn't see her expression, but he felt her heart beating strong, ready to burst out of her chest. In that moment he also felt his body trembling. He had done it hundreds of times before, but never like way… never with his heart…

"If that comforts you … it's the first time for me, as well. It's the first time I make love to someone" he said with a slight laugh.

It appeared that those words, magically made her body lose its tightness again. He slightly lifted his head to face her. He wanted to look into her eyes when he will do it. He wanted to know that she would feel the same way as him when… he will come into her…

He pushed…

She bit her lips again, but she didn't turn his eyes away from him anymore. He knew it hurt her…and if he could, he would share the pain, as well. He tried to push again and she hurtfully clinched her finders on his back…He frowned worried. He thought that It hurt her too much. He thought of stopping. He tried to withdraw, but then he felt her legs clanged on his hips not letting him go… Moreover, she slightly pushed him back.

So she wanted him! She wanted him as much as he did!

He leaned over her and passionately pressed her lips on her. When they parted, he whispered: "I love you, Rukia …please, trust me!" and then, before she could have a reaction… he pushed with all his strength!

She instantly started to yell. He closed his eyes trying to ignore the pain…and one second later her screaming changed its register from pain… to pleasure.

He opened his eyes.

He felt her body shivering.

He saw her violet eyes looking at him…

And the only thing he could say was:

"I'm inside you…"

She smiled as she wiped the sweat of his forehead:

"I know… I can feel you…" she whispered.

"Let me kiss you again…" he said while holding her tighter. "Let me …"

"…have you all…" she completed his sentence with a smile.

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Later, as they were both lying naked in bed, staring at the dark ceiling, Ichigo's eyelids became heavier.

"Ichigo, is it true that after … you know… men become sleepy?" Rukia asked.

"Hmmmm…" Ichigo answered with eyes closed.

"Ichigo, don't tell me you're already asleep!" she added.

"Hmmm…" he mumbled again.

"Ichigo!" she intoned reproachful.

"No! No… there's no way!" he exclaimed immediately and opened his eyes with a regretful expression.

"Good…" she stated smiling and she curled next to him, putting her head on his chest. He also put an arm around her starting to play with her hair. "I was wondering… do you still have that ring?" she suddenly asked.

"What ring?" he asked paying only half of his attention to her, because the other half was already in the dream's land. But as he acknowledged that she actually spelled the word "ring", his sleepiness instantly disappeared. He widened his eyes and turned to her. It was dark, but he could distinguish a girlish smile on her face. He grinned and put himself on the top of her.

"Say yes and I'll give it to you!" he said cheerfully.

"Yes…?" she said doubtfully.

He frowned.

"What kind of "yes" is that?" he scolded her.

"Yes…" she tried again.

He cocked an eyebrow.

"Rukia, it sounds to me that you don't really wish that ring …" he stated.

"YES!" she shouted in the silence of the room and then she started to laugh, embarrassed by the whole situation. He kissed her and then leaned his head on his right palm, while looking into her eyes:

"Unfortunately, I didn't bring it with me… It's on the bedside in our room…" he said nonchalantly.

"Hmm… what a pity" she stated. "Who knows, maybe until tomorrow I'll change my mind"

"You wouldn't dare!" he stated.

"Why wouldn't i?"

"Because I'll bankai that ass of yours!" he replied with a cocky grin.

She started to laugh again and he leaned over her neck kissing it. Her laugh instantly stopped as she felt his hands under the blanket searching for her body. Her heart begun to beat strongly again… but then he suddenly stopped. He raised his head, looking at her with a serious expression:

"Are you sure it doesn't hurt you anymore?" he asked.

Her cheeks turned red, but she cocked an eyebrow:

"You'll never know if you won't try!" she said with a playful voice.

He looked at her confused, wondering if he should continue or not.

"I'm kidding!" she added cheerfully. "I'm alright…" and she pulled him closer.

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An hour ago… I was making love for the first time. Now I'm doing it for the second time…

Rukia was right: there is a first time in everything. First time of walking… first of time talking… first time of understanding how the world truly works. But when Rukia came into my like I felt like she redefined the notion of "first time".

First time the rain stopped…

First time when I felt alive…

First time when I felt in love…

All of them happened when I met Rukia.

She's like an endless string of feelings and emotions I have never tried before… If only this night could last forever…

Somehow I have the feeling that when I'll wake up she will no longer be by my side …Perhaps it's just a silly, childish fear of mine... Maybe it's because I haven't been this happy in my entire life.

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Was that too much? I tried to make it as romantic as i could... Anyway since i care about this chapter more than the other ones, i would like to know all your opinions...so don't hesitate if didn't review until now, do it on this chapter :)

It is also the most important chapter of the story, because it will influence the fate of all the other characters (as well as my others stories i'm presently working on).

So let me know what you think.