A/n: Sorry for the delay again. Hope you guys haven't given up on me. After the last few episodes I just haven't had the inspiration. Nationals were amazing, but The season finally left me with a lot of questions. I get so mad that too often it becomes the Finchel show. So I am sorry but in my fics, I bash them. I can't stand them. So sorry you have to deal with it. But I am back! I have been toying with the possibility of bringing in an OC. Mostly because I am not to fond of Blaine at the moment. So Kurt needs another friend. I am loosely basing him on me. He doesn't share my past, but he does share some of my personality traits, and a few of my mannerisms. So hopefully you guys will like him. And as always please review. I LOVE feedback!
Chapter 8: New Possibilities
So after the disappointment of not meeting Guest64 on Friday, I moved on to try and do my best on my homework, eventually I called Quinn and had her come over and help me. Finn was trying to creep on us but Carol told him to go up to his room and leave us alone. He didn't resurface until dinner, and that was pretty awkward. Finn was still trying to catch Quinn's eyes, but the conversation flowed pretty well with the rest of us.
Over the weekend I tried to send multiple texts to 64, but I never got any responses. I hope everything is okay with him. But now it's Monday again, and it is almost like the football game never happened. The locker shoving continues. I have been able to dodge the slushies for now, but I know that it is only a matter of time.
Glee starts with an interesting yet repugnant twist. Coach Sylvester is going to be sitting in on our practices. But Mr. Schue does give us a bit of information about regionals. The overall theme is Anthems. And that is when Sam gets up and starts singing Justine Bieber. Now I detest Bieber himself, but Sam is actually making the song good. He is singing to Quinn. And the three of us know that this is his break-up song to her. They parted as friends, no hard feelings. It is actually the perfect song for the, right now, and it has all the other girls going crazy for him. This is exactly what he needs.
As I walk down the hallway, I start seeing almost all the girls sporting new looks. They are wearing legwarmers as sleeves? I walk past Rachel and Brittany talking, well more like Rachel is freaking out about something. I could really care less and keep moving. That is when I notice Azimio pushing someone into the lockers, a spot normally given to me and only me. As he makes his way towards me, I stand in an empty doorway, evading notice, and then quietly slip back into the hallway. The person that was pushed into the lockers is now on the floor just sitting there. He is about 5'10" dark strawberry blonde hair that is a bit shaggy, and has quite a few freckles. Thin but you can defiantly see the lite muscle tone. His clothes are a little nondescript, not labels that I recognize. It is hard to read him. He could be just about anyone, but I think he must be new, at least I cannot remember him from anywhere. He doesn't look like he is doing so well, so as the hallway starts to thin out and the bell rings, I go up to him and kneel down to help him pick up his things.
I reach for a notebook and look up into his green eyes, and what I see breaks my heart. I can see the loneliness, the desperation. I instantly know that he is not new to the bullying, but that he was possibly hoping to have left it behind. I finish gathering his things and stand up. Then I hold my hand out to offer him help up and there is an automatic flinch.
All I can wonder is, what has this boy gone through? I kneel back down to look him in the eyes and hold my hand out to him, "I won't hurt you, I promise."
He takes my hand and I help him to his feet. I give him his things and he takes them and embraces them like they are some kind of lifeline. I get a better look at him now; his lip is pierced to the right side, and a tattoo that arcs above his eyebrow that disappears into his hair. It almost resembles something tribal, but I can't be sure. I hold my hand out to him again, "Hi, my name is Kurt, what's yours?"
He looks at my hand for a few moments before he slowly reaches to grab it. He shakes it without applying too much pressure and mutters a simple, "Landon." Much faster than he offered his hand, he takes it back, and I can tell that he isn't really looking me in the eyes. "Nice to meet you, are you new here?"
He nods and grabs his things to him again.
"Okay, well can I help you find your way to class?" He shakes his head no. "Tell you what," I look up and down the hallway. There is no one there, everyone is in class. "Seeing as we are already late, how about we skip, I'll show you a few places in the school that are safe havens. Places that you will not find the jocks, and that the jocks won't find you."
He looks around, and then looks back to his feet for a moment, and then nods his head. I start walking down the halls toward the auditorium; I point out a few places, like the art, Home ec, and music rooms. But the best place above all of them, is auditorium. "The other places are good, but here is a place that you can come to sit in the seats, or even go up on stage. I know that I have come in here many times to try and vent my frustrations with the world. And in almost all of these places, you won't be bothered by others."
He looks around and goes to sit down on the edge of the stage. He puts his things down and crosses his legs, pulls out what looks to be a sketchbook, and starts drawing. Seeing as he will be fine in here, I turn to leave but before I get to the door, "Kurt!"
I stop and look back to him, "Thanks." I give him a short nod, and a look of understanding before heading my way to class.
Later that day in Glee, the guys, sans Finn, walk in all looking like various versions of Justine. I roll my eyes, and look at Quinn who just covers her mouth to hide the laughter that is threatening to bubble up.
"Well it looks like the guys are ready to give us their anthem. Take it away."
We head to the auditorium to they have the stage to use. And instantly all the girls go to the edge of the stage and freak out. Finn sits alone and looks like he can't believe what is going on. Quinn and I just sit off to the side, enjoying the performance, but not getting all crazy like the rest of the girls. Once again, they make Bieber actually sound amazing. They pull off the song really well. Toward the end of their performance, I notice that Landon has sneaked in and looks like he is about to leave. I catch his eye and give him a small wave for him to join us. He just shakes his head and heads more toward the top of the seats. He probably just wants some alone time. I get it. I just hope that things are going okay for him.
Q notices our interaction and has an eyebrow raised at me. I roll my eyes and quietly say that I will explain later. She keeps the brow up but smiles and we go back to watching the guys make fools out of themselves.
After they are done, I take Quinn backstage and we sit down on some sandbags.
"So who is that?"
"His name is Landon."
"And how did you come to know this Landon?"
I roll my eyes. I know what the real question she wants to ask but I answer the one she verbalized, "I saw him get slammed into the lockers earlier today by Azimio. So I tried helping him. I could tell he needed it, then I showed him some places that the jocks don't go and the auditorium was one of them."
"That's all?"
I start to laugh, but cut is short, "Yes, that's all. What did you think?"
"I don't know, something juicer than that though."
"Believe me Q, you will be among the first to know when I finally do meet someone. Plus I am not 100% sure that he is gay."
"I just want you to be able to find someone."
"Thanks, I will, you just have to stop being so pushy." We laugh a bit and before we leave I look out and see Landon sitting where he was before, and he has earphones in his ears, and a pencil in his hand, drawing or writing something.
The next day we walk into the choir room and see Finn dressed up like the guys have been all week. Whatever is going on in their heads, I will never know. Quinn and I sit down on the other side of the room.
"What does he think he is doing, hasn't he been bashing the guys all week for dressing like that?"
"I honestly have no idea Kurt. And quite frankly I couldn't care less. He seems to be all over the place lately."
Mercedes and Rachel's diva off, is quite amazing. As much as I can't stand Rachel, she does have one hell of a voice, as does Merc. I am not sure who out diva'ed who, but it was a superb performance. After going over some other things for regionals, and some more song choices, we are free to leave. Quinn and I start walking to the parking lot. We are going over to her house to look for a song or two that could be a good anthem for us. We get in the car, and my phone goes off. I quickly look to see who is texting me, but its only Finn. I put my phone away and suddenly I am in a sour mood.
"Still haven't heard from him?"
"No. It has been a few days. I don't know whether I should be worried or not. He won't respond to my texts, or my im's. It is like he just dropped off the face of the planet."
"Well maybe he has some personal stuff going on. Or maybe he just needs some time to figure things out for himself."
"I know, but I just want to know that he is okay. At least then I could stop thinking about it."
Quinn laughs and I give her a quizzical look.
"Hun, you would continue to think about it either way. If you knew what was going on, you would be thinking of ways to help him."
I glare at her for a moment, before I give her a smile, "Yeah, I suppose you are right. I would do that."
After we get to her house we go to her room and get on the computer and search through our own music collections trying to find the perfect song. We look for a few hours and finally I stumble across one of my favorite albums. It's by Emmy Rossum. I have sung a few of her songs before, and I know that there is a perfect one for us to do. We run through it a few times making the solo a duet.
So the next day in Glee it is our turn to sing our song.
"I know that this is a song that most of you won't know, but I think that it has a powerful message." Quinn joins me and we sit on a pair of stools in front of everyone. The music starts slow and soft…
Kurt: When she was younger
Stood staring at the door
Waiting for the day that she knew would surely come
Quinn:Tied bows in her hair
Dressed as she thought you'd like
But as time ticked away
Promises fade one by one
Kurt: And now she's all grown
Made it through on her own
Now strong enough to see
That you've been where you want to be
Quinn: No longer dying inside
I will not let you define
Everything I am by one thing that I don't have
Cause I'm more than that
Kurt: I will not be made to hide
These tears won't fall for you this time
Both: I will not be ashamed
Of my name
Anymore
Quinn:Sometimes she wonders
Imagines what you're like
The emptiness inside that made you miss her life
Kurt: The ocean's widen
With all your silence
Leaves the daydreams behind
Childish fantasies unwind
Quinn: And now she knows
You're not coming home
Take the bows from her hair
She's been waiting twenty years
Kurt: No longer dying inside
I will not let you define
Everything I am by one thing that I don't have
Cause I'm more than that
Quinn: I will not be made to hide
These tears won't fall for you this time
Both: I will not be ashamed
Of my name
Anymore
We take each other's hands and keep singing together
No longer dying inside
I will not let you define
Everything I am by one thing that I don't have
Kurt: Cause I'm more than that
Both: I will not be made to hide
These tears won't fall for you this time
Quinn: I will not be ashamed
Both: Of my name
Anymore
Kurt: I will not
Quinn: I will not
Kurt: I will not
Quinn: Anymore
Kurt: Anymore
Quinn: Anymore
Both: I will not
Anymore
The music starts to fade and the song is over. We get a round of applause and we take our seats. Mr. Schue gets back up in front of the class.
"Now that is an anthem. You guys choose a song with a strong, clear message. It had powerful lyrics, and even though the music was softer, and slower, it still had a strong message. Great job guys, now everyone in the room has had a chance to share their anthems. But we do still have one left. Sue has agreed to do a song as well, and she wants all your help."
….
After we sing 'Sing' by My Chemical Romance. I notice that Landon was in the seats again. I excuse myself and go over and sit down near him.
"Did you enjoy the performance?"
He looks up from his sketch pad, "You guys are pretty amazing."
This is the most he has said to me, I am a little taken aback. But I don't let him see that. "I am glad you liked it. You know there are some free spots in New Directions if you would like to join."
He shakes his head, "I'm not much of a singer. Plus I don't do so well with crowds."
"That's okay. You are always welcome to join us though. You don't have to sing. No pressure."
"Thanks for the invitation. I'm not really sure where I belong yet. Things are about the same here as they were in my last school." His eyes go back to his lap, and that sad look comes back to his face. But then he looks up. "You know what; maybe I will come and sit in, it's not like I have anything else to do."
I can tell that he has some inner demons to fight, but that makes him no different from the rest of us. Maybe he will open up more. There are many possibilities.
I say my goodbyes and head toward the parking lot to head home, when I hear my phone go off. I pull it out to see who text me. Its Guest64.
Guest64: Sorry I haven't gotten back to you. I was dealing with some personal issues. I am not sure that I am ready to meet. But if we could keep talking I think I would like that. Thanks and sorry again
I am so happy to hear from him, I text back without even thinking.
Oh it's okay! I am just happy that you are okay! You had me worried there for a while! I hope everything is okay now, and there is no pressure to meet or anything. Of course we can continue talking. I have missed my talks with you! Just let me know when, or text me whenever.
I wait for a response but none comes, but at least he is okay. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my chest, and I can breathe again. Good thing it's the weekend again…
Song is Anymore by Emmy Rossum. Go and listen to it! It is AMAZING!
Also, if there are any songs you might like to hear in upcoming episodes, let me know, and I might try to fit them in!