Hola! As I promised, Edward´s moment. Thank you my dear, dear, dear beta Jo! Thank you all of you for your reviews and alerts. Thank you for everything!

Twilight=SM LOTR, the FF lol, is mine :)

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Chapter 19

EPOV

This is not the time to be freaking out. It's not. I can´t go back. It has to be now. Okay, who am I going to get to to believe that? Seeing all the people when I came into the pub was one thing, but now, watching everybody from backstage, where did all those people come from?

"Fucking perfect." I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed deeply. "I´m not going to make it tonight." I was so concentrated in my thoughts that I didn´t hear people coming up behind me. "Fuck!" I yelled, feeling a pain in my head. "What the fuck?"

"Stop being a pussy, bro. You can´t go back, and if you think you can run away, you are so wrong, dude. Jasper and me closed the doors and the security guy at the main entrance knows he can tackle you. So, be a man." Emmett laughed.

"Hmm, thanks for the advice, dude." I rolled my eyes. "Just for the record, I wasn´t going to run away."

"Yeah, right, you were there watching all those people and freaking out. You had that look, the same one you had when those fucking panic attacks were going to start."

"You remember those days?" I asked sadly.

"Of course. I was there, but I´m not stupid. You went through a lot of things. I saw you in pain, in the darkness. I saw you crying, shaking. I know you see me like the big brother, and you think nothing bothers me, but it's false, you know? I really felt bad for you, really helpless. For the first time I couldn´t do anything for you."

"You were there, and it's a big deal." Emmett breathed out and rested his hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah, but I felt like I was failing you. I´m the big brother, I´m supposed to be watching you and Alice. I should have kicked Jane´s ass that night and not you." I patted his back.

"You never told me how did you felt. Why now?" I looked at him, very surprised at his words.

"Because now you have a second chance. Our family is here, your friends, your woman. Everybody did something for you, but this is all that we can do. All the rest depends on you. It's your decision to face this and make a new beginning for you, and Bella, too."

"Who would ever say that Emmet Cullen is a wise pussy?" I joked, giving him a strong hug.

"Okay, okay. I have my days, and don´t push your luck."

"Thank you."

"No problem. Now get on stage and kick ass."

"And there's the real Emmett Cullen."

"You know me, I can´t be sentimental for too long. I´m going to find Jasper. I left him alone between lights and cables and I don´t know if he's still alive." We both laughed until we heard Alice coming.

"Be careful, don´t speak that way in front of her."

"What are you two talking about? Where is Jasper?" Alice stood there with her hands on her hips.

"Oh, nothing. Men stuff," Emmett said, running away.

"If I hear you talking shit about my man, you are dead," she yelled. At this point the situation was really hilarious to me and I couldn´t stop laughing. "And you Mister, get ready."

"Yes, Miss." How many times had I heard 'It's time'? I don´t know, but it was. My band was on stage, the people were outside waiting for us. My family, my friends, and my Bella. I started to feel nervous. This was going to be a big change for me. I closed my eyes concentrating on my breathing. One thing I have learned about breathing exercises is that they are really good to let stress out. I felt relaxed, calmer, but also I could feel her. She was here. I could feel her look, her presence, her warmth behind me. That is one thing that makes me smile.

"I can feel you, Brownie Eyes." I heard her giggles and she started to approach me. We held each other and it felt like an eternity. Sadly it was time to come back to earth. Bella was sure that I was going to be okay, that the show was going to be great. Sometimes I wished I had her confidence.

"It's time." I nodded without looking at her.

"Stay with me. Very close," I told her.

"I will, but eventually I have to see your parents."

"I love you," I said and kissed her. I could kiss her for the rest of my life.

"I love you, too." Bella gave me a smile.

"Let´s go people!" Alice yelled.

I completely forgot that feeling when you are walking on stage. Listening to the screams, the music starting; it was exciting. I had missed that feeling. Finally on stage, I waved to everybody. When I saw my Brownie Eyes, the music flowed.

But it was getting closer. The moment when I had to sing my songs. Can I do this? I cleared my throat looking at the people.

"Thank you for being here. It´s been a while and still I need to grease the wheels." I smiled hearing the laughs."If you look over there, to your right, left and center, well, this is not a drill, but you can see some people ready to jump on me if I don´t keep singing, so how about a little bit more?"

"One, two, three," I whispered and my band followed me.

I had no idea how long I played, no words came out of my mouth, just my fingers making the music. Until I heard her voice next to me. I looked at her, Bella was shaking, but she showed me the way, my path again. And I followed. After a moment that felt like an eternity, I heard cheers, shouts, and whistles. Bella was blushing and very embarrassed.

"Oh, my God. Tell me I didn´t do that." My Brownie Eyes hid her face on my chest and I couldn´t stop laughing.

"Yes, you did. I love you."

xxxxxx

The night was a win. A huge success, and all because of my Brownie Eyes. Again, she helped me. Again, she was there, and now I was here surrounded by my family and friends. All because of her.

"I wonder what the song is that you are mentally writing, Cullen." I turned around and found my old friend Demetri.

"You'll have to wait to listen to it, dude." We greeted each other with a big hug. "Has it been so long since the last time we met? You look old, man," I joked.

Demetri just laughed. "It´s good to see you again. It´s been a while. I´m happy for you, Edward. Your family told me what had happened and, seriously, you should have told me."

"I couldn´t do it, Demetri. It was my problem, not yours. Even if you had your suspicions. Now it's done. I´m moving on after complicated times."

"I see that. Your girlfriend is the kind of woman that's hard to find." I looked around and saw her. Bella was laughing with Alice. She must have felt it or something, because she turned around and gave me a smile.

"I know. She is everything to me. I´m here because of her, and after what she did tonight, I won't let her go. Never."

"For a moment you were in trouble, man. Like the saying behind every great man there is a great woman."

"I'll make a toast to that."

"Bella sings wonderfully. She could join you, if you wanted."

"She is great, but I don´t think she wants that. It's our thing, you know?"

"I bet. Man, I have to leave, tomorrow we are hitting the road again, but I´m really happy to see you and hope you can join me someday. We need your music."

"Thank you, Demetri. I guess we'll again be on the road. Maybe you will join my tour."

"I count on it. Say 'hey' to your family, and trust me on this, marry that girl. You won´t find another like her."

"I know. It's going to be an impossible mission, dude, but that girl is worth the fight." Demetri left and I was surrounded by my people. My family and friends. Marriage, I thought. It wasn´t a bad idea. After all, we were living together, we loved each other. I didn´t know what the road had in store for me in the coming weeks, but I definitely wanted to take that step.

"You're lost in your thoughts. Hmm. Not good," I heard from behind me. Turning around I saw my beautiful Brownie Eyes smiling. I sighed looking at the most incredible and the most stunning woman on earth. Definitely I want her as my wife.

"Come here, Brownie Eyes." Bella giggled and in seconds I had her in my arms. "I was thinking of you, beautiful." I kissed her forehead.

"Really? Something perv maybe? You know, there are a lot of people here. Don´t make me cross that line, not that one," she teased me.

"Demetri was impressed with you."

"Jealous?"

"Yes." She kissed me fiercely. "No."

She giggled. My Brownie Eyes was enjoying this too much. "Don´t be."

"And I´m very impressed, too."

"About?"

"Your singing. It's beautiful, Brownie Eyes."

"No, no. Don´t go there." I gave her my puppy dog face. "No, not that face. I won´t sing, I told you before, you are the musician in the family, not me. I did it for you. I still can´t believe I did that."

"You know what else he said?" I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her to me.

"Nope, but I can´t wait to hear it." She kissed my jaw.

"That I should marry you."

"What?" I laughed at her expression.

"And I´m thinking about it. It's a great idea." I teased her and Bella shivered. Her expression said it all. She was surprised without any reaction. If I didn´t know panic attacks, I would say she was going to have one. I smiled and pulled her to my chest where she finally relaxed. Knowing the effect, I was going to play a little bit more.

"Marriage," I whispered into her ear seductively. Bella tensed up again, and I rubbed her back. "Someday, but not too far away."

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Ohhhh. Evil Edward *shaking head* What is Bella going to do now? I can´t stop laughing, I´m evil too *Evil grin*

You know what to do :D Happy Holidays! See you soon...