I do not own the characters of Neon Genesis Evangelion, nor any other aspects of it. Although Eva Unit 05 did dissapear under mysterious circumstances...what're the salvage laws in that part of the world?
Rating: T - a fair bit of swearing (this should probably be rated higher)
Initial Peturbation
CHAPTER 9 - Critical Point
No questions asked. That's just what Shinji had when he got balled up into the Section 2 sedan (black, naturally). It was late-afternoon and the sky was already darkening. Asuka had gone out shopping, that universal therapy. Shinji had been absently chopping vegetables for dinner while listening to his dusty S-DAT. Now he was sat in-between two burly suited men in sunglasses, a bottle of the foul-tasting 'pilot pre-battle supplement' concoction in his hands. Yet Shinji asked no question.
He didn't want to hear the answers.
"Get your hands off me!" he exclaimed when he wasn't exiting the car quickly enough for the agent's liking. He glowered at the glorified bodyguard, straightening his shirt with an aire of dignity. He boarded the elevator to Nerv's core silently, surrounded by darknesses personified.
"This could be bad, kid. I hear the test-site is the target zone." one of the men remarked.
"Shut up Sheffield!" another grunted.
"Hey, he's gonna know anyway. It cant hurt to be nice to the kid. He's got it tough, right Shinji?"
Shinji gritted his teeth.
"Nobody pays you to talk, especially not to the kid." the grunter told him.
"I'll bet the Commander doesn't want you to talk to me." Shinji said bitterly, breaking his internal vow of silence. "I make a better pawn if I know nothing."
That shut them up. Except for an under-breath "Poor bastard." from the chatty one.
Section 2 left him as he passed the Operations point, presumably to take a break. 'Probably their only chance,' Shinji wondered. 'Maybe they actually like Angel attacks, they get to eat donuts.' he thought irritably as he pulled on his plug-suit.
'Go directly to Evangelion Cage 2" read the big instruction sign in the locker-room. Mentally shrugging, he jogged to the Cage, bypassing the briefing room.
The Eva was launch immediately, and Shinji found himself popping up out of the ground on the outskirts of the city. Unit 00 was already there, Eva-sized bo in hand.
"Rei, what's going on?"
She answered calmly. "There has been an explosion at the Matsushiro testing facility. A blue-pattern was detected at the site at the time of the explosion. No contact with the facility has been made, and the Commander is our commanding officer."
Shinji absorbed the information pensively. "An explosion...Touji..."
Unit 02 burst out of the ground, joining the prototype and test-type. "What the hell is going on! Why won't anyone tell us anything?"
"Matsushiro exploded, and apparently the Angel is there." Shinji said morosely.
Asuka frowned, "Misato..." she whispered.
"Indeed." a voice came over the intercom. "I am in charge of this sortie. You will move out to the given coordinates and await my command."
"Father..." Shinji growled under his breath.
The trio of biomechs moved out together, Shinji lagging just a bit behind the others. It was getting darker by the moment. '6.27pm. I should be letting the potatos sit and heating the broth.' he noted absently.
"We're in position," Asuka reported, having stepped ahead of Unit Zero to reach the target coordinate first. "Awaiting further orders." she said expectantly.
"Acknowedged." the Commander replied shortly.
"What's our tactical situation?" Asuka questioned pointedly.
"Stay in position, Pilot." Ikari ordered, letting a tinge of irritation enter his voice.
Shinji unsheathed his katana and began spinning it in his Eva's hand. Bored with that, he started twirling it, committing it's already well-known heft to memory.
Asuka puffed in irritation. "Shinji, stop that! It's annoying."
Shinji ignored her, and began practising sweeping cuts in the air.
"I'm warning you!"
"No extraneous chatter!" the Commander barked.
"Well tell us something! We've been waiting here for ages!"
"SILENCE! Pilot Sohryu is on report."
Asuka growled in irritation. Shinji kept sparring. Rei stood motionless.
Minutes passed.
Shinji realised that he could barely see the katana well enough to spar, and put the weapon away. He would leave switching to night vision until later.
"Pilots at the ready." the Commander's voice said. The three tensed, looking to the horizon where Matsushiro lay.
"Mein gott...how could it have been possessed?" Asuka gasped.
Shinji sighed a heavy breath. "Not Touji, not Touji, damnit. Not Touji."
He gulped. Everything seemed very slow. He had time to think. Time to act.
'No...I'm a coward...I don't want to act.'
Touji will die.
'Fuck. Fuckit.'
"Asuka, Rei." he said loudly. "Ano...okay, okay...Asuka, we'll attack the Eva. I mean, the Angel. Damn. We...we'll try and take it down, get it's attention. Rei, you sneak around the back of it, alright? When you get the chance, spear-tackle that bastard to the ground. Onto it's front. We'll get Touji out, okay? That's what we'll do, we'll get the entry plug and Touji out."
Asuka brandished her twin Kodachi. "Not a bad plan...let's do it!"
"Assuming that the plug is in the Eva, I will comply, Shin-chan." Rei said.
Fuyutski raised an eyebrow back on the command deck at Nerv. "Ikari...your son is challenging your authority."
The Commander replied impassively, "It is irrelevant who provides tactics. We shall see the scenario played out. Pilots, we have information that the plug is inside Unit 03. Proceed."
"That sounds like fatalism to me me, Ikari."
"You'll see, Old Man."
Shinji held out a restraining arm. "No, Asuka. If we use the weapons, it's too dangerous for Touji."
"What!" she squawked. "We're not fighting humpty-dumpty here Third Child - we can't give the enemy that much advantage that we're trying to protect it!"
Shinji's hoarse voice came through quietly, the fury choking his words. "That's my friend in there. I will not take the chance of him getting hurt."
He watched as Asuka replaced her weapons.
"Alright, dammnit." Shinji called. "Let's go!"
The gentle valley splitting the hills toward the possessed Eva curved slightly. Rei took a low route through the topography as Units 01 and 02 took to the high ground, fanning apart to meet the still-distant enemy. They started moving toward the black Eva at walking pace.
"Ayanami?" Shinji said questioningly.
"Still in transit." she answered.
"Look at that thing. It's like a puppet...like a doll..." Asuka said in disgust. Indeed, the black Eva's gait was sluggish and ungainly, a marionette with strings held by a disfunctional group of children. And yet, the movements had an oddly predatory feel. Entirely purposeful, and full of malicious intent. The neck slumped, like a muscle-bound brute with no mind of it's own, just a black and terrible goal. It's steps were heavy, the arms swinging in sympathy but no grace in a single motion.
"Alright Asuka, I'll go first and you grab it, alright?" Shinji mumbled uncertainly.
"Pah. Battle plans never survive contact with the enemy. Just try not to get in my way." Asuka answered.
"Asuka..."
"I know, I know. We'll save your stupid friend first. Idiote."
"I am in position."
"Alright Rei, we're starting our attack. Asuka, let's go!"
Unit 01's pace suddenly burst into a power sprint toward the Eva Possessed. Bardiel's jaw cracked open as the two Evangelions dashed toward it in a full offensive rush. Eyes glowing, it roared in jubilation, flinging it's arms out at them.
"Gah!" Asuka spluttered.
"Garghchk!" choked Shinji. Opening his eyes, he found his Eva dangling from Bardiel's arm at a distance of several times the arm's natural length from the Eva. It's eyes bored into his. From the corner of his eye he could see Unit 02 caught in the same trap.
"Nrrrrrghck!" he rasped as he brought his hands up to pull at the elongated forearm, trying to slacken the terrible pressure at his neck.
Maya's voice echoed in his ear. "The neck armour is buckling! Both Eva's in danger!"
"HRRRRRRMMGH!" Asuka's voice smouldered over the comm. link. Unit 02 released it's shoulder holster and painfully reached into it to retrieve the progressive knife with one hand as it grasped at it's neck with the other. With the weapon in hand, she proceeded to cut at Bardiel's forearm. The knife buzzed, slicing through the armour like a carving blade through plastic. Finally she was into it's flesh, and then it's bone as purple blood gushed around the wound and the intruding knife.
Distracted by the pain, Bardiel's grip on both the Evas slackened, but not enough.
Unit 01's hand clamped harder to the arm, trying to crush it.
"It's no good!" Maya wailed. "The knife can't cut through the bone - it must be something to do with it's stretching!"
"AYANAMI!" Shinji gasped.
Four Evas tumbled to the ground as Rei charged at Bardiel from behind like a bull. Unit 01 was thrown a small way, but Unit 02 fell awkwardly. Momentarily stunned, Asuka couldn't get up right away. Leaving Unit 00 to face Bardiel alone.
"Nobody messes with my homeys, bitch." Rei monotoned, real anger distorting her voice an octave higher. She pounded the fallen Angel's head deeper into the dirt, and tugged at the partially exposed entry plug. Bardiel twisted sideways, using a lanky leg to knock Unit 00 away.
"Oh no you don't!" Asuka hollered and dove onto the prone black figure. It roared, throwing an arm around in a loose roundhouse. She should have been able to avoid it, it should have just annoyed her when it connected, but something strange happened.
A sickening crunch sounded. Unit 02 fell to the ground like a ragdoll. Asuka's eyes went wide as pain beyond comprehension tore her body away from her.
"OH GOD!" Maya shrieked. "UNIT 02'S SPINAL NERVE HAS BEEN SEVERED!"
Asuka just lay in her seat in shock. She couldn't move. All she could do was stare at the image projected in her plug, of the cold green ground. She could see the ground shake as the collosal machines moved about her, hear the bass rumble of their struggle. But she couldn't move. Minutes passed painfully, but she couldn't think. She could only wait for the inevitable outcome which she could no longer influence.
Meanwhile, Unit 01 had regained it's feet and rejoined the fray.
"You goddamned MONSTER!" Shinji wailed, pinning the beast as Unit 02 fell. He grabbed the black Eva in a headlock, struggling to maintain his hold as Bardiel bucked and wallowed. Unit 00 pinned it's legs by thrusting it's jagged knee armour into the back of the black unit's knees, bursting through the flexible armour of the area. Even as the black Eva heaved and shook, she forcefully dragged the white cylinder of the entry plug from it's back, meter by tortuous meter. Several times she had to stop, readjusting her position as the balance of power shifted.
"I've got him." she reported finally. Just then, Eva 03 managed to overbalance Unit 01. Shinji fell back a little as Bardiel's leg once again connected solidly with Unit 00, throwing it over.
"No!" she gasped as the entry plug fell from her hands. Trying to recatch it, she accidently batted it away violently. It was flung about wildly through the air, away from the battle.
"GNNOOO!" Shinji screamed. He grabbed the Angel's shoulder, and began ramming his fist into it's face. Blank eyes grinned back at him. Seemingly oblivious to the pounding being received to it's head, Bardiel's arms came up and grabbed Unit 01's neck even as the black armour started to crack. Shinji immediately panicked and began to pry at the crushing fingers that constricted his throat once again.
Mistake.
Bardiel roared in Unit 03's approximation of laughter, whirling around and bodily throwing Unit 01 away. It slammed into the side of a hill, it's armoured form cutting into the ground several meters with the impact.
"Pilot of Unit 01 unconcious!"
Bardiel turned around to face it's only remaining threat, ignoring the downed Unit 01 as it had the broken Unit 02.
Unit 00 had once again taken to it's feet, battered but undefeated.
"I find your actions...unacceptable." Rei monotoned.
Unit Zero brandished the bo, swinging it toward the demonic presence. It fell heavily on it's shoulder, cracking at the armour when she released the trigger. An intense pulse of photons burst from the landed tip, melting the armour and cooking flesh, sending a powerful concussion through the Eva. It sprawled backwards, retinas fused from the light output.
Rei came upong it, drawing the bo back to deliver another blow at the Eva's chest. The Angel lashed out blindly with an elongated arm, knocking Unit 00 off it's feet again. It sprung up like a fluid and managed to land on blue machine. It's cracked jaw breathed a cloud of vapourised purple blood and held it's arm over Unit Zero's left shoulder. Opaque white liquid seeped out of the armour and fell onto the struggling form. In sank in, running in rivulets about the taken limb.
"Cut it off!" Ikari roared.
"No! She still has voluntary control of the limb! Biofeedback confirms it! She's holding back the invader!" Maya gasped.
"It would appear that she's unable to continue combat anyway." Fuyutski mumbled. Rei's stricken Eva shook as it fought off the infection.
"Activate the Dummy Plug in Unit One!" the Commander ordered.
Maya gasped. "Sir, are you sure? It's not ready yet!"
"It's better than nothing! Which is what we have right now!" he barked back.
"Activating Dummy Plug."
"So much for faith." Fuyutski grumbled.
"God helps those who help themselves." Ikari growled.
Unit 01 awoke.
"89% of emotional variables unknown. We won't have much control." a female tech reported.
"As long as it works."
"Objective set, enabling modified A10 link."
Unit 01 leapt off the hillside. Bardiel, which had been considering it's prey in unusual regard, turned to face the renewed threat. It roared, joyous at the renewed chance to battle. Rubber arms flew out to meet the charging Unit.
The katana slashed out in a wicked arc, severing the limbs. Unit 01 swung again artlessly, beheading the beast to the throbbing beat of squirting fluid. Again, down from the shoulder diagonally through the chest. Up through the thigh, cutting through the abdominal cavity. Bardiel was shredded, riddled with deep slashes, and down.
Unit 01 continued to slash, incising into the chest cavity to tear at organs and pull them up from the shell of Unit 03. It dug the sword in, and it jammed between two exposed ribs. The purple unit, showered in bluish-red blood and gore, growled in frustration and pounded the last of the organs into paste. It then wandered over to find the dismembered head, crushing it with a powerful blow.
Then it turned to Unit 00.
"Oh my god! It's registering Unit 00 as a part of the Angel!" Maya gasped.
"Shut it off!" Ikari barked.
"Shutting it down...refused! It refuses to shut down!"
"Eject the entry plug!"
Hyouga looked over his shoulder at the Commander. "We can't! Unit Zero is on it's back!"
Unit 01 pounced onto the shaking Unit, and growled in satisfaction. Grasping the left arm, it snapped the bone and began to tug the arm away from the prototype's body.
"No! Eech!" Maya squealed.
"Rei..." Gendo whispered.
Unit 01 tore the arm off of the Evangelion, breaking tendons and cartialge to send the limb arcing through the air. It then wound an arm back to throw a punch.
"Shut off the dummy-plug life-support! Increase core pressure to 600 kilopascals!"
The arm unwound, unleashing a thunderous impact at Unit Zero's neck.
Nobody moved as the purple behemoth collapsed, rolling off of Unit Zero lifelessly.
"All units...have gone silent." Hyouga breathed.
The blood-red sunset died on a battlefield barren of victors. The members of Nerv were forced to look upon sullied ground and the cost of defeating the Godly Messengers.
Asuka woke slowly. She sat up a bit, aware that something was wrong. She squirmed a little. 'My body feels like it's wrapped in plastic.' she thought.
The girl grimaced in the private hospital room, the antiseptic smell making her feel unhappy. Visiting a hospital never meant well, in her experience. It used to mean people dying. Now it meant that she or her friends had just visited death.
She got up slowly, shocked to find that walking was a little difficult. She found her way to the en-suite bathroom in the hospital gown, and sat to relieve herself.
'Gott, what a battle. One stupid Eva versus three...I got trashed in the first few minutes. I guess we won, at least. But it wasn't me who won. They did it without me.'
'How did that rubber-Angel get me! A lucky hit! We make our own luck damnit...maybe it was the damage when it was choking me. Maybe. It's not good enough, Asuka!'
'I hope Shinji's okay. And Rei. Oh Gott, and Misato. Baka-Touji too, for Hikari's sake. Scheiss, why can't they leave my friends out of it!'
She held a hand at eye-height and flexed it. 'Still numb. I hope it's some medication or something. Oh Gott, don't let it be permanent!'
Finished, she left the room awkwardly, unhappy at being clad only in the gown. But she couldn't wait around to get dressed. She needed answers.
Naturally enough, the Pilots tended to recuperate in adjacent rooms. Asuka nervously inspected the opposite room, only half-expecting a fellow pilot. Afraid of what she might see.
Shinji lay, still as death on a bed. The curtains were drawn, the room dark and murky.
Asuka made her way to the bed, and inspected the pilot critically. No obvious damage, she observed. 'Wait...under his fringe. A bandage. Sheist.'
"Shinji?" she called meekly, gently.
'Asuka.' he mouthed, opening his eyes slowly. 'Headache.'
Asuka mouth warped into a wry smile. 'Baka.' she mouthed back. She put a hand on his, smiling at him. He smiled back and closed his eyes.
She silently squeezed his hand and turned to go. He shifted and clutched at her before she could move. 'Stay.'
Asuka rolled her eyes and carefully picked up the visitor's chair, bringing it over to the bed. She set it down with a slight thump. Shinji winced, bringing his other hand to the side of his head.
'Sorry.' she mouthed. He smiled his forgiveness.
She sat down and Shinji closed his eyes again. She was surprised when he reached his hand up onto her head, and started gently stroking her hair. Asuka smiled and closed her eyes, reaching her hand up to gently stroke the hand that stroked her.
"Well, I see that you're both fine!" Misato said as she entered the room.
Shinji jolted upright and clutched at his head in pain. Asuka got up and angrily pushed Misato out of the room. 'Shutup!' she mouthed urgently.
Misato paled and held out an apologetic hand before letting herself be ushered out into the corridor. 'I'm sorry!'
Asuka carefully closed the door behind them. "Misato!" she hissed. "He's got a headache you bitch! Concussion, I guess!"
Misato held her face in her hands, "I'm sorry! Sorry sorry sorry! Didn't know!"
Asuka rolled her eyes. "Of course not, Major Idiote!"
Misato looked her up and down. "Well, at least you're alright. I'm glad."
Asuka blinked. "And you!" she grinned. She noted the bandages and head wrappings with chagrin. "How about you? I was worried when we heard...we all were."
The older woman smiled gently. "I'm...okay. Ritsuko too, but we lost thirteen personnel...technicians, engineers, scientists...it was bad. We didn't do too good this time, kiddo."
Asuka said, "Well, at least all the important people are okay. How's my Unit 02?"
A shadow crossed Misato's face before she dismissed the callous comment and grinned. "You'd never know Ritsuko had just been in an explosion, the fun she's having with the challenge of fixing the Evas. Unit 01 is okay, your Unit 02 requires some work to repair. Unit 00 is bad, and of course we lost Unit 03."
Asuka's face darkened. "Touji...how is he? And Rei, is she okay?"
"Touji's...in a medically-induced coma. Severe high-gee wounds, internal...yeah, it's bad. As for Rei, I havent had a report on you three except that you're all in hospital."
"Yeah...damn. We're all here, huh?"
Misato looked away. "I'm sorry we make you do this, Asuka. To you, to Rei, and to Shinji."
"Yeah...you should be. He doesn't belong here, Misato."
The Major shrugged helplessly. "Let's go see Rei, hmm? Then I'll return you to your boyfriend and say 'hi' quietly."
"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Asuka grumbled.
"She's in constant pain - something that I have an idea of how to exorcise, but it will take time."
"That is not my concern, doctor. First priority to the Evas, and then her ability to pilot. We have no time for humane indulgences."
"Sir. Any load on her nervous system will affect her piloting ability."
"Indeed. I leave it to you to judge where our resources can best be used."
"Yes sir."
"And you, doctor. Are you...functional?"
"Yes, sir."
"Good. We will both be able to work toward working off our fatigue."
"Sir...with the amount of repairs required for Units Zero and Two, I can't really afford the time. Not to mention our latest Project-E developments being destroyed with the Angel."
Ikari raised an eyebrow. "Very well. All work and no play, Ritsuko. But you will do as you see best."
"Of course, Gendo. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Yes. Goodnight, doctor."
She looked whistful while she took a sip from her mug after he left her office. 'He's so different under his hard 'Commander' act. Like a wounded dog. I wonder, if he could ever show Shinji that side of him?' Ritsuko shook her head to exume herself of meaningless fantasies.
"I'm touched," she heard as a puff of smoke rounded the corner of her office. "I'd assumed that side of him died with Yui Ikari. I thought only Rokubungi remained."
Ritsuko rolled her eyes. "Jealous, Kaji?"
Kaji grinned. "Always, precious. I wonder, does the 'damaged goods' act take the shine off the all-powerful appeal, or does it make a complete package?"
Ritsuko rolled a leg over her other to sit back casually. "In general, I wouldn't know. But with him, it works."
The spy smiled knowingly. "Yes, I suppose it's an enourmous complement to your femininity. So, what have you got for me?"
"Seele 06 left me a message, apparently feeling me out for a cat's paw. I gave it to Mother to analyse. Here." she pushed an A4 sheet of paper toward him.
Kaji took it and folded it up, placing it inside his jacket. "I take it you accepted?"
"Still trying to find out my allegiences?"
"Of course, when I can but follow."
"Now Kaji, you don't actually want to try to lead me to believe that you're as innocent as that?"
"I suppose innocence was rarely a card I could play."
"Funny that. Well, shouldn't you be going out to play with Misato? I know she's in need of comfort right now."
"Well, with both her kids banged-up...you're right, I'll go and impersonate a decent person for a few hours."
"It's a role you play well."
"It wasn't always an act, Rits. Take care of yourself too, you look like hell. I'll be seeing you."
"Bye."
Shinji gingerly supped on a bowl of congee, sitting up in bed as Asuka hovered by him. "Domo," he whispered as she took it and placed it on the bedside table.
She gave him a smile and gently pushed him back into a lying position. He settled back and gazed through the open window. Sunlight filtered through.
"How's Touji? Is he okay?" he asked quietly.
Asuka nodded. "Sure, he's fine."
Shinji frowned. 'He hasn't come to visit. Ayanami neither. Something's not right.'
"Really, Asuka. How is he? And Rei?"
"I told you, they're both fine."
"Asuka, really! I need to know." he said, raising his voice slightly for the first time since the battle.
Asuka sighed. "Touji's in the hospital, recovering. Rei too."
Shinji moved to get up. Asuka started, and began pushing him back onto the bed. "Vorhang dummkopf!"
Shinji resisted her. "Asuka! This is important to me!"
"Idiote! It's important to me that you stay put! You've got a skull fracture, junge!"
Shinji gingerly let himself be soothed back, gently resting his aching head on the pillow once more. "I know, I know. Have you seen them?"
"...ja. Rei can't talk or use her left arm. And Touji's still unconcious."
Shinji looked at her. "And you. You're not better yet, are you? You're not just staying here for me, you're here because of your injuries too. What's wrong, Asuka?"
Asuka bit her lip. "Ich...I feel numb below the neck. Not completely numb, just sorta dull or something. But it doesn't make any difference, ich bin fein."
Shinji looked thoughtful. "What about piloting Eva?"
She looked downcast. "I don't know yet."
Shinji nodded, thinking again. "Asuka...could you visit Touji and Rei for me? Tell them I'm sorry I can't come visit, and to get better for me?"
Asuka smiled sadly. "Baka. Touji's sleeping."
"I know. That's why I want you to do it."
She sighed and stretched, looking at the ceiling. "Fine. As long as you stay here and get better. Baka."
"Thanks, Asuka."
She turned to leave.
"Oh, Asuka...why are you speaking in German so much?"
Asuka looked startled. "I am?" She thought for a moment. "I guess it just feels around you. Baka." she threw the last in for good measure as she left with a smile she knew was mirrored by his.
"Dr. Akagi? I think you should have a look at this."
"What's wrong Maya? Let's see...oh dear."
"Is it due to the feedback, ma'am? I was sure the A10 shunts were working."
"Well, an organic-synthetic interface is always going to be a weak link. We can be thankful that it worked at all."
"Ma'am, she could have been killed!"
"Yes. Us too."
"I can see both sides of the argument for the dummy-plugs now, but it seems to be choosing between a rock and a hard place. I couldn't control that horrid thing..."
"Ssh, Maya. It wasn't your fault."
"Frankly ma'am, it was our fault. Just because we had no choice doesn't mean we're not guilty. Poor Rei...the A10 shunt didn't work at all for her. At least they cut in eventually for Asuka."
"Mmm, I know. We'll be able to assess the damage when they come in for tests...but honestly we can't expect good news."
"Yes ma'am. I'm beginning to understand what you meant about not being able to afford to have scruples."
"Don't be so hard on yourself. The fact that you accept it means you'll be in a position to remember them when you can afford to."
"I hope so."
"Meanwhile, our Second is in trouble. See what you can do with the personal data, we may be able to tweak the threshold levels."
"Aye, ma'am."
"Asuka? You can go now. You're finished."
Author's Rant:
It's been a busy week, so no complaints! Let's see how much trouble the kids are in for with the 13th (since Iruel hasn't made it's appearance yet).
/ Omake for Chapter #9 /
Hikari giggled. "...his sensitive side."
Asuka looked aghast. "And which, exactly, is that stooge's 'sensitive side'?"
Hikari blushed a deeper red. "His...backside..."
"..." Asuka sweat-dropped.
"He asked me to smack it...he likes that..."
"..." Asuka lapsed into shell-shock.
"And in return, he..."
"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Asuka screamed. "I can't take anymore!"
"That's what I..."
"SHUTTUP!"
"Geez Asuka, get with it. I never figured you for a prude."
Asuka looked sulky. "Well, it's just...we're not as promiscuous where I am from..."
"Ooh...poor, innocent Asuka-chan..." Hikari said silkenly. "Just ask Shinji, he really knows what he's doing...why don't we go on a double-date? Or I can give you some lessons right now..."
Asuka fainted dead away, unable to contain the nose-bleed inducing thoughts of Shinji...and Hikari...
Touji popped up from the bushes behind Hikari. "'Sensitive side'" he snorted.
"Well, it would be if I..."
"Look, I told you - first we date, then we can try stuff. Good work on taking out the devil, here."
"I know...you owe me two-hundred."
"Cash!"
"Either that or naked pushups."
Touji went rigid in shock. "No way! You're such a pervert, Hikari." he said, counting out notes.
"I have an older sister." she replied with a shrug, recounting the bills and pushing them into her bra.
Copyright 2006, but this week's special: each paragraph for only 50 cents! Get in quick!
-fin-