I do not own the characters of Neon Genesis Evangelion, nor any other aspects of it. I gave Unit 01 to my sister, after I had an interesting time getting it through customs.
Rating: T - a fair bit of swearing (this should probably be rated higher)
Initial Perturbation
CHAPTER 13 - Overshoot
Shinji woke up from his daze as familiar landmarks went by. He noticed the turnoff to Misato's apartment go past. "Are we going to Nerv?" he asked.
Kaji eyed him through the rear-view mirror. "Yes."
"Does...my Father want to see me?"
"You've been ordered back to HQ. I'm not really sure why." 'Although I can guess.'
Shinji waited sullenly in the car while Kaji went into the Nerv building, leaving the boy to sit in the gloomy, fortified carpark. An armed guard would pause on his patrol occasionally, only to look at the emotionally-weary pilot and talk into his radio. 'I'm still here, dammnit...' he thought in irritation.
"With all due respect, the boy's had enough. How much of that iron grip are you going to exercise on the kid's fragile heart?"
"His heart is irrelevant. That he is alive, is. That he will serve our purposes, is more so."
"If you break him, he'll be of use to no one. Least of all you."
"He has been contaminated by that woman.. The illusion of false motherhood has been imprinted on his mind. I must ensure the damage is undone."
"Don't undo the damage, let it heal. Let him go home, let Misato fuss over him for awhile and let Pilot Sohryu give him some reason to keep living."
The screen stayed static as the Commander's stoic visage looked at the agent, but didn't really see. "Very well. We will take whatever action deemed necessary after he has reacclimatised here. I will hold you responsible for his well-being, agent."
Kaji puffed up his fringe when the screen went blank. "Hmph."
Shinji followed Kaji up to Misato's apartment in a vacant daze. They were the same steps he had trod a thousand times, but they seemed different somehow. He'd been away what, six days? Seven? But the world was darker now.
Kaji stood aside as Shinji put his key into the lock. Ami had kidnapped his stuff along with him, solving the immediate clothing problem ahead of time. And now the problem of getting in.
He opened the door and stood at the threshold. His fringe dangled over his eyes, thanks to his depressed, slumping posture. "Uhm, thanks Kaji-san. Bye."
Kaji looked at him in concern. "You don't want to even think about everything, huh? If you can go back to where you were, that's good. But don't let this fester too long, Shinji."
Shinji carefully kicked off his shoes, and closed the door. "Tadaima." he said, mostly to himself.
'So much for me being joyfully thanked by our grateful Major.' Kaji thought ironically. 'Poor kid...'
Shinji padded into the kitchen, eyes still cast low. He went to the kitchen for a drink. He found a clean glass in the cupboard.
That was odd.
'Who's...been cleaning up? Are they even still here...?'
Shinji looked around for the first time since getting in. The place was clean. Not quite spotless, but everything more or less in it's place.
'It usually takes Misato and Asuka ten minutes to mess something up...'
"Shinji?"
The boy turned. It was Asuka.
"SHINJI!"
Said victim found himself bowled backwards into the kitchen bench as the full weight of an Eva pilot impacted on his small frame. "Aah!"
"Shinji no baka! You dummy, where have you been! Damn you stupid Ikari, baka baka baka!" Asuka cried, latching onto him like a limpet.
Misato rubbed her eyes as she came into the room, leaning against the doorway and grinning like a loon. "Damn you two, not on the kitchen table."
Asuka blushed and pulled back. She seemed unwilling to break contact fully, however, and kept a hand by his side. "If you ever leave again I'll kill you." she growled.
"Uhm...sorry?" Shinji said in surprise.
"Yup, that's him alright. We accept no imitations, the genuine Shinji Ikari is home!" Misato said as she walked over and engulfed the teen in a way that would take Asuka several years to rival. The bust/height ratio would never quite match as well as right there and then, however...
"Get off him you whore!" Asuka howled.
'Since when did every female I meet want to mother me?' Shinji wondered absently.
"Baka! Stop enjoying it!"
"Don't worry Asuka, I'm sure he'll enjoy yours as much in a few years. Or maybe decades." Misato sniffed happily with a cocky glance at the teenager's bust.
"Damn you, let him go!"
Misato let him go. Shinji smiled in a happy daze at his roommates. "I-it's good to be back." he said.
"Dinner." said Misato with a nod towards the refrigerator and a merry twinkle in her eye.
"Waarck!" Pen-Pen deigned to comment in confirmation of Misato's request.
Unit 00 inexpertly twirled it's shock-bo in the simulator. A frown creased Rei's fine features as she concentrated on the weapon.
Ritsuko cursed. "That's not good enough, Rei. You're completely exposed and the MAGI Angel simulator has all but Gaghiel having critically damaged or killed you!"
"I must familiarise myself with the weapon in order to improve."
Ritsuko's brow ticked. Maya sat back in her seat. "Ma'am, this is ridiculous. She's dropped twenty-three points and seems to have lost all of her combat skills and battle sense, since the accident. This doesn't make sense! It's not one-in-a-million, even the MAGI say this is impossible. Not even the Thirteenth Angel's attack can explain this."
The doctor watched the five-day-old pilot bat ineffectively at the ethereal Angel. "Rei, practice with the Progressive Knife for now. We'll put you on an intensive combat training program to get you 'back' up to speed." she said to the girl in the machine.
Maya frowned, looking to her superior for an explanation. "What's going on here, sempai? This doesn't make any sense."
Ritsuko massaged the bridge of her nose, trying to exorcise the tick. "All things have an explanation. However, sometimes it never deigns to make our acquaintance, Maya. That's the reality of life. It can be arrogant and stubborn, like a man."
"If you say so, ma'am, but I really think we should be investigating this more. Motor coordination shouldn't be affected by amnesia. It's learned on a subconcious level."
"I know that, Maya." Dr. Akagi snapped. "We'll deal with the facts we have and not speculate about useless things, alright?"
"Yes ma'am." Maya moved her seat back in to her terminal sulkily. 'Except a certain scientist I know speculates about everything.'
Shinji closed his eyes while his hands automatically went about the process of washing the dishes. It felt better, to be alone. It was evening and the light from outside was pretty dim. It felt right, not to turn the light on.
Solitude.
'From where I was forged, I return. Back to nothing. Dust to dust.'
He paused a moment too long, looking at the boning knife in his gloved hands. Gazing at the edge. Memorising it's tip.
He put the knife onto the drying rack carefully. No need to dull the blade.
Asuka watched in silence from the doorway. Music still blared from her room, the light emanating at the end of the hallway behind her.
'He's back...but he's not back.' she thought, perturbed. 'Maybe a part of him didn't come home with him.'
Shinji continued washing.
Asuka cleared her throat. "A-hem. Well, since the sink is busy I guess I'll help you dry so I can get a glass of water sooner." she enunciated officiously. Shinji looked back at her blankly as she fetched the dish towel.
"Uhm...drying the dishes won't get you your drink any faster."
"Oh, so now you're too good to accept my help, Third Child? You should be happy when good fortune smiles at you so magnanimously."
"Anno...where did you learn a word like that? I'm not sure what it means."
"You should know! It's your language dummkopf."
Shinji just shrugged and went back to his dishes.
"Hey! Don't ignore me! I'm honouring you with my presence, the least you can do is talk to me!"
"Uh...about what?"
"I don't know! Do I have to do everything around here?"
"I'd...rather not." Shinji said, concentrating on scrubbing the colander in his hands.
"Baka! What's wrong with you!"
"Nothing..."
"It was that bitch who kidnapped you, she did something to you. Did she hurt you?"
"No...well, sort of. Never mind."
"What did she do to you Shinji?"
"I said NEVER MIND!"
Shinji was gripping the colander rigidly. "Just...I don't want to talk, alright?"
Asuka paused in her drying, studying the fragile boy. "Do...you wanna talk about what happened? I mean, I want you to talk to me about it. What happened?"
Shinji ignored her as he moved onto the next dish.
"Did she tie you up? Hit you?"
Still he ignored her.
"Keep you confined? Starve you?"
No answer.
"Draw smiling flowers on your face and make you wear pink?"
Shinji sniggered. "Uhm...no...I mean, how did you guess?"
Asuka smiled broadly. "Hah! No-one can keep quiet when Asuka Langley Sohryu is on the case! Pink, huh? That's a crime against your puny allotment of masculinity. No forgiveness! Uh...she didn't make you wear a dress did she?"
"Yeah, just like the Sailor-Scouts."
"Hmm, this crime just gets worse and worse."
Shinji sobered. "She was...nice to me. She was so nice, Asuka. Like she meant it when she said she cared for me. I guess she must have, taking me away against my Father's will and everything."
"She was nice!" Asuka scoffed in disbelief.
He nodded. "She...was mothering. Not like Misato is, I would say that Misato is like a big sister. But Ami...she took care of me, Asuka. I wasn't her real son, but...I called her 'Mum'. I called her 'Mum', Asuka!" Shinji broke down, collapsing to his knees in front of the sink, holding his wet gloves up.
"Scheiße!" Asuka swore and touched his shoulders.
"Don't touch me! Get away from me."
"Shinji!"
"If you get close to me, something will happen to you too. It's probably too late for Misato..." he mumbled, pushing her away.
"What are you carrying on about, Third Child? Gott, you need a psychologist."
Shinji let out a humourless cackle. "Yeah. A psychologist would fix all my problems, make them all go away in a cloud of drugs. I'd be like a dummy-plug, I'll just do what my Father tells me. That bastard." he seethed.
Asuka sat down next to the boy, sitting in the kitchen and observing it from a different point of view. Pen-Pen's, to be exact.
"Y'know..." Asuka started quietly, "I lost my real mother too. You know when I talk to 'mama' on the phone? It's really my stepmother. She tried to replace my real mother after she...died."
Shinji lifted his head and looked at her.
"I guess I never actually gave her the chance to actually replace Mama. I...couldn't let her replace the real thing, you know? Either she was Mama, or she was not. I don't hate her or anything...but she's not Mama."
Shinji blinked and let his head rest against the bench, still looking at her. "I...get it, I think. I called her 'Mum'...never 'Mother'. Because...she isn't Mother. She's someone else."
They sat in comfortable silence, reviewing the complicated relationships that ruled them. It seemed only moments later when it was getting too dark to see.
"I'll switch on the lights." Asuka said, standing up.
Shinji smiled at her in the darkness. "Thanks."
"I reaaaallly don't need this..." Kaji groaned, draping his forearm across his eyes. Fuyutsuki was standing by Ritsuko's desk, the two senior Nerv personnel looking at the agent of one accord.
The Professor's eyebrow quirked in amusement. "For a szechuan-spice chef, you're kind of under-prepared for Hell's Kitchen."
Kaji slumped into a seat and looked at the older man with the disinterest of a captured criminal. "I'm more of a ramen man myself. Although Misato almost cured me of that, many years ago."
Ritsuko chuckled dryly as she poured the beleaguered man a coffee. "Ah, men. Were you a wise-cracking type of man in your younger days, Professor? Will Kaji eventually try to emulate a wise-man after he's gained a minimal level of maturity?"
"I've always leaned towards the academic, but I hear from Section 2 that Kaji's played the fatherly role to young Shinji on a couple of occasions. Of course, that may have been a gambit for the Major's attention."
"Can we leave my shallow motives out of this? If I must be shackled to a dungeon and dully tortured, my briar-patch would be the aforementioned Director of Operations. She knows just how to grab my..."
"Gah!" Ritsuko pouted. "Shut up already! Kouzo has decided to go along with our plan."
Kaji sat up. "What!"
Kouzo fingered his chin thoughtfully. "Mmm. The Doctor's plan piqued an emotional response I hadn't felt for some time, ever since we brought those kids into this war. No doubt Gendo would have my head and your balls for this, but in the scheme of things that doesn't seem so bad any more. I'll cover for you as much as I can."
Kaji shook his head and chuckled. "Is anybody loyal to that SOB, or has he managed to become the most dangerous man in the world all by himself?"
"Lets say that his backing was mostly conditional. His predecessors didn't leave much of a legacy when they were...dealt with. The one who actually managed to achieve SEELE's objectives was always going to be of a certain...character." Fuyutsuki mused.
"That man is the reason any of us lived through the Third Angel's attack." Ritsuko pointed out sourly. "Anyway, with the Sub-Commander's help I think we can get 'it' back and I can start the project under Ikari's nose. How soon can you get it here, Kaji?"
The Agent glanced at his watch. "About 6-ish, depending on traffic."
Ritsuko looked startled. "Just how close is it?"
Kaji grinned. "In a lovely little place with a view and a garden. I'm sure she's enjoying it as we speak."
(Hey Shinji!)
Shinji grinned wryly. "What's up, Kensuke?"
(Man, you gotta tell me what happened in the battle! The whole city is a wreck and I think even the Geofront got damaged, there was this giant hole in the ground! C'mon man, you're my inside contact!)
The teenaged pilot puffed air, vexed. "You know Section 2 monitor this line. It's not exactly a nice story to tell, anyway."
(They're the best type! Real-world stuff! Accidents and injuries and chain-of-command and court-martials!)
"You're obsessed. C'mon, you must've heard this stuff from Touji by now anyway."
(Nope, that guy is even more tight about it than you. I mean, it musta hurt to get injured but he's got all these cool attributes now! Like a in a RPG!)
"Sorry Ken, but...err...orders and all that."
(Yeah, I know. You're a model soldier, Shinji! Anyway, at least tell me what you've learned in training! I haven't seen your sword-form for weeks now.)
"Uhm...I haven't been for a while now. Since you guys moved away."
(Damn. It must be tough, cooped up there with the Devil. Or are you two together again?)
"Uh...I don't know."
(Hah! Touji owes me twenty. Anyway, gotta go. Dad's looking at the timer and groaning.)
"Sure, well thanks for calling."
(No probs, you're my inside man and my buddy!)
"Eh, okay. Say 'hi' to Hikari and Touji for me. Are they official yet?"
(Nah, they're like a couple of shy geese or something. Tell Rei I said 'hello' and the devil that I looked up her number and it was 13-13-666.)
"I'll, uh, do that. Bye!"
(I just thought of that one, good huh? Bye!) click
Misato loomed over the sleeping boy. "Let's go shopping, Shin-chan! You need some new clothes, and we can do the groceries too."
"We're running out of extra-chili instant ramen are we?" Shinji groaned, wiping the sleep from his eyes. "Why don't you get the Yebisu men to bring it with them when they do a delivery?"
"No room, smart-arse. Get your scrawny butt into some shopping clothes, chop-chop! Leave Asuka, maybe she'll wake up next time I prod her with a pencil. Not that she doesn't shop every week anyway."
"Not the pointy end?"
"No...maybe next time I'll use the retractable one on her desk. Staedtler. I'm sure she'd prefer that."
"You're so cruel, Misato-san."
"I'd send you to wake her, but then you two would just be in there forever. I'm too young to be a grandma already!"
"Someday you'll realise that that joke is getting old."
"Nahhhh...hurry up or I'll have another beer."
"Hai."
Shinji went about the process of 'getting ready'. His body moved, the tasks of putting on clothing and brushing his teeth, popping some toast and fetching fish for the resident marine exterminator. He didn't really notice - his thoughts were elsewhere. Centered mostly near a town not far from Osaka.
"Shinji, have you seen my sports bra? The black one with 'piping hot' written down the side?" Misato called out.
"It's in the dryer."
'Would she still care about me if I didn't do the laundry? Yeah...but with no Eva? I guess I wouldn't even be here...still in that granny flat in Sensei's backyard...'
"Have you fed Pen-Pen?"
"Yeah."
'I wouldn't have met Asuka either. She's still be in Germany or America...she wouldn't be here. Maybe Misato wouldn't be either. We'd all be living our seperate lives. I'd...still be alone...'
"Have you had breakfast?"
"Yeah..."
"Well get in the car then. Let's hit the road!"
Shinji barely noticed the considerable gee-forces as the little coupe tested the mechanical grip of the straight-laced city roads. The world outside went by in a blur, bright colours that teased his eyes but he didn't rise to them. He was looking inwards.
'Eva...it's given me worth. I'm worth something, so I'm a target. Father needs me, Ami wanted me, Misato has me. Without Eva, none of that would be true. If someone else was it's pilot, I wouldn't have to be here. I could go away...'
"Hey, Shinji? Earth to Shin-chan, Earth to Shin-chan. Come in, Shinji."
She was waving a hand in front of his eyes as she took a 90 degree turn at 40, one-handed while watching her teenaged passenger.
"Uh, yes Misato?"
"Whoa, who's a little space-cadet today?" Misato teased as she slammed on the brakes and pulled on the handbrake to drift through a tight corner. 'Off-camber left coming up...second gear 3800rpm into the bend...feed in the power...' she mentally figured.
"I'm...just thinking."
"Well, don't make a habit of it okay?"
Silence as Misato concentrated on watching the red flag...err...light.
"You're pretty distracted today. I guess you've had a lot on you plate these last few weeks. Well, you can just relax and let us take care of you for a while. You deserve a break. Take-out tonight, okay?"
"No, it's okay. I can...keep going."
"That's brave of you Shinji, but you should know we're here for you. If you can hold out, the Commander said there's only a few Angels left. Then you can plan for your future."
Shinji frowned. "I...don't need to do that."
Misato blinked and took her eyes off the tachometer to look at him. "Of course you do! You've got to think about your future, you know. College, buy a house, get married, have kids..."
"I don't think so."
"Heh, I know you're a little young to think about these things, but..."
"I'm just...waiting for an Angel to claim me. You know? One of them will do it sooner or later, right? The Angels...maybe they're trying to help us? To take us to the other side of living. Maybe we're better off there?"
Misato stared straight ahead at the clear road in front of her, haunted fear impressed into her eyes. "Shinji? Don't...say such thing alright? You're freaking me out..."
"Is that why Kaji sent Ami there, Misato? Because she's better off?"
Shinji was thrown forwards in his seat, straining against the seatbelt as the tyres shrieked and the blue Renault's chassis groaned under the braking load. Wide-eyed, Misato pulled the car up and quickly unstrapped herself and got out of the car. Holding her head between her hands, she paced back and forth in frightened indecision. She looked back at the boy, still sitting in the car. Then she turned around and took a step. Then she turned around again.
Dashing to the car, Misato opened the door and stuck her head between the front seat. "Noo, Shinji. You weren't supposed to know that! He had to do it, what else could we do? Either that...or let Section Two have her...no, Shinji. It was better for her, but not for you. We have to protect you, we need you."
The Major looked at the boy's blank face. He sat, dead-panned, staring at the back of the seat in front of him. Not lifeless. He was too rigid to be lifeless.
Misato swore under her breath and took out her mobile. "Shit. Get me Section Two. Chen? Good. I need a 27-B on the Third Child. That's right, suicide watch! Well you go tell him like a good little boy, but make fucking sure you set the 27-B protocols first. You got that? Alright. Out."
Shinji's lips moved to let a whisper slip past. "...she's gone..."
"You took your time."
Kaji shot the origin of the barbed comment a dangerous look. "I got here as soon as I could. Beyond the call of duty."
"Is there a higher calling than this? Here we're operating on the level of the gods, or trying at least."
"Humph. Power beyond imagination is a clear sign of delusions. Riddle me that one."
"Quite. The task hasn't changed. See to it."
Kaji saluted. "Aye-aye, Sub-Commander Sir!"
Fuyutsuki rubbed his brow. "Let's have none of that. Keep her alive until we've gotten a bit more control around here."
"I would have preferred the role of 'handsome prince', but being 'sleeping beauty's keeper' will have to do."
Misato had taken him home after that. She kept looking at him at intervals, between pedestrians and red lights. Her lip was bleeding slightly from where she had been nervously nibbling at it.
Then she went shopping. Though she had doubts about the effectiveness of retail therapy on this occasion.
She knew she'd be buying vegetables and quality meat for Shinji to cook. 'Or should I do it myself? No, damnit, don't want to make things worse. Ritsuko, I really need to go drinking right now!'
She took out her phone a she drove. "Misato? What's up, it's before midday."
"Sorry Rits, a bit of an emergency. I think Shinji's...come out bleeding after being close to a hedgehog."
The faux blonde blinked at that one. "Uhm, sure. Look, I'm in the middle of something here..."
"On a Saturday? I thought you'd finally gotten your weekends back again."
"Uhh, something came up as usual. Look, Shinji's a good boy...just give him some TLC, or some time alone, or a pornography magazine to keep his mind off things."
"Ritsuko!"
"What? Look, I really gotta go, I'll talk to you later."
Misato pouted. "Fine. Maybe I'll ask Kaji to have a chat to him...maybe understanding will help. Or maybe he'll try to deck him, that could be therapeutic, right?"
"Misato!" Ritsuko scolded. "Don't play at being a quack psychologist!" Distracted, she spoke away from the phone. "No, turn it the other way! Jeez, don't hold it like that! These things were never meant to be moved..." she turned her attention back to Misato. "Look, I understand Kaji's doing a special project for the Sub-Commander so don't bother calling him. I'll catch up with you later. Ja ne!"
Misato stared at her silent phone, eyebrows narrowed. "Something stinks. Maybe I'll try Hyuuga, he's always got his nose stuck into things."
Shinji sat listlessly on a seat in front of the TV. He idly flicked the Saturday morning cartoons on.
Asuka was up, slumping around in her pajamas. "Oh, baka. What's on?"
"Samurai Pizza Cats."
"Is Polly in this episode?"
"Nah. Just Speedy and Guido. You think Guido would make a good match for Rei?"
"Hah! Just because he's blue? Yeah, I can just see his 'charm' working on Wunder-mädels personality. Hey, did you finish my cocoa-pops?"
"I put them on a higher shelf after Pen-Pen found them."
"Baka penguin."
"He got it in his eyes. I thought he was crying remorse, but it was cocoa."
"Heh heh. Stupid penguin."
Shinji watched contentedly as Asuka curled up on the couch. She watched him watching her.
"What are you thinking, baka?" she queried in a jocular tone.
"About you." he said.
She smiled indulgently. "And what are you thinking about me, baka?"
Shinji rested his chin on his fist. "I'm thinking how you act so strong, so belligerent. I'm thinking that you tell the world that you're the best because you're not sure if you're the best, and you're waiting for it to be proven. Because, when it's proven, you won't have to say it anymore."
Asuka rolled her eyes, and scratched the side of her head thoughtfully. "Hmmm. I don't think I like you understanding me too well." Shinji just grinned. Asuka fixed him with a predatory glare. "I think you owe me an ice-cream, Third Child. Double-choc! And Cherry! Schnell!"
The boy chuckled. "What, and spoil your cereal? Later. After cartoon hour."
"Baka! It lasts until noon!"
"Lunch then."
"Your treat."
"Deal."
"Wundebar!" Asuka cackled contentedly. "Where's Misato, I thought she was dragging you to the shops?"
Shinji shrugged. "Dunno."
Asuka fixed him with a look. "You're different, you know that?"
He looked away. "Must be the silver lining."
"Eh?"
"'For every silver lining there is a dark, dark cloud.'"
"Humph. Don't go all morose on me now, Speedy has to take out the giant mecha with his stay-sharp ginzu pizza-knives."
"Are you...calling me short?"
"Ya-huh."
Shinji stood up. He loomed over the couch, making Asuka suddenly feel rather vulnerable. She felt her leg twitch as she saw the manic glint in his eyes.
"Tickle attack!"
"AAAAA!" Asuka shrieked, managing to deafen Shinji's right ear. She tried to roll away, but the boy pounced before she could defend herself.
"NOOO!" she gasped, trying to cover her vulnerable bits as Shinji switched between them rapidly. Finally she kicked up a pillow and managed to get one up on him. They tumbled to the floor in a mess of limbs and touches.
Shinji realised his hand was on her shoulder, just above her breast.
She looked into his eyes.
He moved his head closer. Hearts pumping hormone-charged blood around their bodies. They could feel blushes heat their skin clear down to their legs.
He kissed her. Close-mouthed, gentle and soft like a jelly. He wrapped his lips lightly around her upper lip. Asuka closed her eyes under his touch.
He moved his head closer, sliding his nose past hers, to kiss the side of her mouth.
She giggled. "You've got a big nose." she purred.
"So do you." he grinned back.
They regarded each other's eyes from point blank range, seeing the tiny flaws and details they'd never seen before. They could smell each other's skin and breath.
'Like...being 'home'...' Shinji thought.
Asuka turned her head. "I...need a shower..."
Shinji pulled back quickly. "Oh...uh...sorry."
She grinned at him. "Oh no you don't! I just woke up, so I need to wash. We can...keep going afterwards, if you like."
Shinji sighed in relief. "Eheh...uhm, yeah. But...what about lunch?"
Asuka paused. "Hmm. You could...take me to a movie, Third Child..."
"Uhm...yeah..."
The red-headed teen shook her head in mock disgust. "So romantic...not! Behave while I'm gone, okay?"
Shinji watched her go and shook his head thoroughly as the door closed. "Man...I felt like I was someone else just then."
He picked up the spilled bowl of cereal off the floor. "Maybe she'd be proud of me..."
"Man, it's late."
"You get used to it, after you've played at cloak-and-dagger for while."
"Heh, you Agents all talk like that. Must be nice to get around, I get to sit right under the Commander's nose all day long."
"That doesn't sound pleasant."
"It's not so bad. He's mostly only there during the battles. The Sub-Commander is usually there, but his vision isn't so good anymore. Can't see what I'm up to."
"What are you up to that you don't want people to see?"
"Oh, this and that. Emails, operations news, latest trends. When operations gets a bit slow, I like to write song lyrics."
"Seems like you're a kid with some substance to support your ego."
"Who are you calling 'kid'? The long hair? Keeps the ladies interested. I don't need stubble for that."
"Touche. Got any cancer sticks?"
"Nah, it's not my karma. Try the doc, she keeps a pack or six around."
"This deep in the complex?"
"Hell, man, she's the only one who seems to come down here. This is, like, the bottom of the Pribnow box. Those freaky mutilated Eva bodies are just through that wall."
"The perfect place for a clandestine contact-experiment."
"Duh. That's why we're here."
Author's Rant:
-
Next up, we play with metaphysics and see just how screwy things can get. Don't worry though - there should be more fan-service than in the series. Maybe some comprehensibility as an added bonus, too!
Rahhel, thanks for fixing my offenses against the German language! And, of course, pyramidgirl89 for her continued support.
Omake for Chapter #13
Due to the current adverse economic circumstances, the light at the end of the tunnel has been switched off until further notice. On hot days, windows above the third floor will be opened for your benefit.
"That's just great, Ikari!" Fuyutsuki snarled sarcastically, "You've plunged the world into an economic crisis!"
"Indeed."
"I told you to clean up your finances, but noooo, you had to overextend Seele's credit on building giant robots. Then you just had to accessorise them. Two-tone paint? Sticker packs and mood lighting? Spoiler extensions?"
"They express my masculinity and individuality."
"And the pyramid! In a gigantic cave big enough for a city! What, you're trying to be an ancient Pharaoh from Atlantis or some mixed-up history shit like that?"
"A diversionary tactic to confuse the enemy."
"Like making little kids pilot said robots!"
"They are not 'little kids', they are teenagers."
"Just! And what's this? Saving money by leaving the end off of your logo? Pah! And your mission statement; 'Evil Angels from Outer Space are Coming, we'll protect you with our giant, purple horn'd robot'...is that the name of a porn site? What are you on, and where can I get some?"
"I cannot disclose my sources."
"Face it Ikari, you've failed the scenario. You're ruined."
"The outcome is subjective."
"I'm afraid not. I'm giving you an SH for Sloppy Housekeeping, IT for Intelligence of a Turd, and an F, for Fail."
Gendo sat, stunned. "Not again. I must repeat final-year AGAIN? This will terminally affect my Yui-and-the-Antarctic honeymoon scenario."
The Sensei just shook his head as the young man slumped away from his office at Tokyo-U. "Humph. Who'd ever put him in charge of anything?"
Copyright 2006
-fin-