"I'm gonna miss him." Huey says, placing a hand on my shoulder. I nod once, my silent tears falling from my eyes. I couldn't stress to you how much I was a wreck. Kyrie was too. I was afraid he'd end up harming himself or others. "I'm glad you came and met Granddad. He always complained at how Riley would go off at all times of the night for some girl."
"Sorry about that." I mutter, chuckling a bit. I wipe my face, taking a deep breath. "Can you… tell me what he's said about me and my brother?"
"He didn't really talk about Kyrie as much as he did you." Huey says, taking the seat next to me. "But, he spoke about you all the time. I remember once, he called me up while I was still away at college and was raving about how he met the best girl in his life. He said he would do anything to keep you happy. He went on and on about how you were a beautiful model and how much he was in love with you. Then he said that he was afraid to show you off because he knew you'd leave him." I exhale. I would never leave Riley.
"I remember him calling me too." Mr. Freeman says, Huey getting up to help him sit. "He went on about how you were his soul mate. Which was surprising to me, because when he was younger, he would go on and on about how he hated women and called them hoes. But then he went out with this one girl, I want to say was his first love and his whole attitude changed. He changed completely. He became more mature. He did a lot for this girl. He became a better man for this girl."
"Her name was-"
"Celeste." I say, nodding. "He told me about her."
"Yes. But she just up and left." Mr. Freeman continued. "Now, he may not have shown it, but I knew he was devastated. You could see it in his eyes. But he kept on doing the things he did when she was with him, because he found out he enjoyed them. She may have made him that better person, but he made it his mission to keep on doing that. Then, one day, he gets into an argument with me and instead of making things worse, he leaves. This turns out to be the same day he met you and your younger brother. He comes back after being with you the day after, apologizing to me and telling me he met some perfect people. I remember talking to him, and I remember telling him 'you don't think she's just using you?' and he gives me the most offended look. Now, it's nothing against you sweetie pie, I was afraid that it'd be another thing like how it was with Celeste. Riley was taking up several jobs and barely coming home for you and I was worried." I nodded, understanding. "He said he never wanted to see you struggle and that he's never loved someone as much as you did. And when I visited him in jail a day or two before he… ahem, he told me everything. He told me about everything. He said he couldn't see you like that, stressed with bags under your eyes. Working hard for him and your brother. He told me he didn't deserve it. He told me that he didn't deserve you." Mr. Freeman clears his throat, his voice cracking.
"You don't have to say anything else Mr. Freeman."
"What Riley told me was that he felt as if he was done. And I when I asked him what he meant, he said that he felt as if he was done on this earth. He went on to tell me he had never really believed in God until you, and that he knew that having you came with a price. He thought that his life was his payment, and that he had to go. He cried then. I hadn't seen him cry since he was a little kid." Huey says, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "He said he couldn't bear leaving you, but he knew that if he stayed, things would continue to go wrong. He saw the man who was following him as an bad omen. An omen that his days are numbered."
"The man… in black?" Kyrie asks, and I turn to face him. He's been silent this whole time. "He's been following me too." He wrings his hands, slightly nervous.
"Riley was paranoid." I mutter, shaking my head and fighting back tears. "That guy wasn't an omen, he was one of OG's members." I whisper, my voice trembling. "It wasn't anything… like that, it was-"
"Ray, regardless of what you think… that's how it was for Riley." Kyrie mutters and I close my eyes tightly, my hands going onto the table.
"Why didn't I know? How could I have sat there with him when he's felt like this? I needed him and it was my fault that-"
"Sweetie pie, please." Mr. Freeman says, placing his hand over mine. "I know it's hard, but it isn't your fault. You cannot read minds."
I shake my head. It was my fault. I lost him. I never knew how empty my life was without him. I always feared that I would lose him to another girl, but this… this is much worse. I'd rather him reject my love and leave me than this.
"In a letter he wrote me that was given to me after his passing," Huey starts, lowering his head. "He talked about nothing but omens. Bad omens. He said that everywhere he went, he was being watched by the same man. A man in black, like Kyrie says. He said he felt as if God was talking to him, telling him that it was time." I bite my bottom lip to keep from sobbing. "Whether it was just hysteria and paranoia or how he felt about it… it happened."
"I'm so sorry." I cry out, the sobs bursting from my mouth.
"Rayen, please don't." Kyrie says, placing a hand on my shoulder, but I couldn't stop crying. He felt this way because of me. He went crazy because of me. It was my fault, no matter what people. All of this. If we wouldn't have ever seen each other. If only I would have pulled Kyrie's wrist once more, continuing to treat him like a child with or without Riley, none of this would have happened. This whole thing was my fault.
And now; Mr. Freeman was in tears, a lone one slipping down his cheek; Huey's head was lowered, his eyes tightly closed to keep from showing emotion; and Kyrie had me, a hysteric almost widow, in his arms, trying to soothe me with calming words.
But it wouldn't work. Nothing would. I felt terrible. I ruined someone's family. I ruined someone's life. I ruined mine.
How could I live without Riley?
… I don't think I can.